đif u like caleb xia (and also specifically fem caleb), madoka magica, ace attorney, and land of the lustrous, letâs get married (âĄËÍ ęł ËÍ) âĽď¸
đtags: #lovefromjelly (posts by me!),
#jellySSR (my favourite posts, not selective serotonin receptor ijbol)
#apple_jelly (caleb postings!!)
#jellytalks (rambling/yapping)
#talktojelly (asks!!)
đmy ult groups (ŕˇËáľËŕˇ) loona, zb1, kep1er (㼠ᴠ_á´)ăĽâĄ
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Qualityâ Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
summary: in which you forget to tell the lads boys that you love them.
ft. xavier, zayne, rafayel, sylus & caleb
notes: suggestive comments so MDNI / NSFW, xavier is pathetic again, zayne is kinda evil (lovingly), rafayel is stupid, sylus is lovely, caleb is strangeâŚno explicit mentions of gender (!!!), a few suggestive comments but thatâs it (i think)
p.s. iâm like genuinely knocking tf out whenever i hit post so if something is grammatically incorrect or i accidentally post my entire life on hereâŚlook away until i wake up maybe!
a/n: this is kinda bad iâm SORRYâŚiâm sleep-posting this iâm so tiredâŚty for reading (- -)(_ _)
Warnings: +18 (mdni) fem!caleb, brat!caleb, authoritarian!zayne, fem!zayne, threesome, strapon use, tit worship, oral fixation, infantilization?, masturbation, brief feet stuff?, voyeurism, nicknames (pips, little jasmine, jasmine, honey), mommy kink, use of jeijei, theyâre not blood related, Caleb is a brat and Zayne puts her in her place duh, lemme know if I missed anything!
Inspired by this wonderful piece of art
Your eyes nearly rolled to the back of your skull as Calebâs thick strap hit a particularly deep spot within your cunt. Each roll of her hips had you losing your breath, a breathy moan falling past your lips. You tried to muffle your sounds by hiding your face in the comforter, but the one rearranging your guts wouldnât allow that.Â
You felt a hand at the back of your neck before you were propped up onto your knees, your back pressed up against Calebâs soft breasts.
âSo fucking cute when you get all whiny like that.â Caleb teased, a hand coming to settle on your jaw, manicured nails digging into your cheeks as she forced you to look at the view before you.
Zayne looked like a vision, reclined against the pillows with her legs parted, offering you an unobscured view of her perfect, pink pussy that was being stretched out by elegant, scarred fingers. There was nothing you loved more than to see your girlfriends in such a vulnerable state. Whenever you saw either one of them bare and spread out before you, youâd get this certain look in your eye. Youâd look at them as if they hung all the stars in the sky themselves.
The raven-haired female must have curled her fingers into that specific spongy spot as a startle moan fell from her lips, back arching and pushing her perfect tits out for the whole worldâyouâ to see.Â
Your bottom lip quickly found itself caught between your teeth as you wanted to take her lovely dusty rose-colored nip into your mouth.
Brought back to the present as the tip of the strap fucking you open, bullied your cervix, the back of your head knocked against Calebâs chin before falling along her shoulder.Â
âPretty, isnât she?âÂ
Caleb questioned, but to whom the question was directed remained unclear.Â
âStunning.â
Was Zayneâs response while you let out a whiny âyesâ, the pit in your stomach growing by the second. It didnât help when Caleb moved her hand from your jaw down to your belly, pressing down on the bulge that formed when she bottomed out.Â
âCan feel you trembling, honey. You gonna cum? Gonna soak jeijeiâs cock, huh?â
Once you felt your body stop shaking, you fell face-first onto the bed as you were no longer held up by Caleb. Hearing a familiar squelching sound, you glanced up at Zayne through your lashes, unable to even lift your head at the moment.Â
There she was, cheeks rosy from the orgasm she had given herself as she watched you reach your very own high. The pink color had traveled down her neck and onto her heaving chest. With a sigh, she slipped her fingers out of herself before trailing them up along her pelvis and in between her tits. She oh so unintentionally brushed a slick-covered finger along one hardened bud, the juices sticking to the skin.
Your mouth watered and your lips fell open at the sight of her breasts. They were begging to be sucked and kissed and played with, and you were more than happy to do so.
Zayne knew how much you enjoyed having their boobs in your mouth. Which is why she couldnât help the slight smirk that graced her face. Curling an elegant finger, she gestured for you to crawl over to her.
Using what little energy you had just recovered, you tried to inch your way over to her. You were stopped by a pair of hands that settled on your hips and pulled you back onto a plastic cock that was immediately nestled between your puffy folds.Â
Calebâs name fell from your lips, your tone whiny and frustrated.Â
âWhere do you think youâre going?â She asked, bringing a hand down against the fat of your ass in a harsh slap, which earned her a cry. Gripping the base of her fake cock, she nudged the tip along your tender clit. âDonât run from jeijeiâs cock.â
Hazel eyes rolled, Zayneâs annoyance with the younger femaleâs greediness evident.
âDonât be a brat, Caleb.â Zayne stretched out a hand towards you and wiggled her fingers, gesturing for you to grab onto them. âYou may be her jeijei, but donât forget who her mommy is, yeah? Câmere, little jasmine.â
Before Caleb could stop you again, you slipped from her grasp and settled yourself between Zayneâs spread legs.
She didnât give you another momentâs notice before her hand slipped into your hair and tugged you towards her mouth. Tongue pushing past your lips, you could taste your lip gloss that clung to her lips since the kiss you gave her when she got home.Â
She was rough, stealing your breath without hesitation and biting your bottom lip, hard enough to pull a cry from you.
âOh, hush now. You can mouth off to Caleb all you want, but not to me.â She reprimanded, the stern expression replaced with something soft as she nudged your head towards her chest. She pushed herself up on the pillows. âHave your fill, but make sure to stick your ass out for this one. Otherwise, we wonât hear the end of it.â
Caleb scoffed.
âI can hear you, you know?â
âThatâs why I said it.â Zayne retaliated, a hand brushing your hair back as you were too busy nuzzling the swell of her breasts to even pay attention to their bickering. âHave at it. Before I change my mind.â
Caleb mumbled under her breath, bed shifting with her added weight as she positioned herself behind you. She was just about to push the mushroom-shaped head past the opening of your hole, but was stopped by Zayneâs foot that pushed against her toned stomach.Â
âBe gentle. Yâfuck her like a damn brute.â
Caleb smirked. Bringing Zayneâs manicured foot up to her lips, she pressed a kiss on the pad of one toe before taking one into her mouth. She pulled it out with an obnoxious pop, then spoke.
âIf youâre jealous, just say so.â
Zayne tugged her foot away, an aghast look on her face.Â
âGet on with it before I change my mind.â
By the time Caleb slipped her strap back inside of you, you were too caught up on suckling on Zayneâs tit. The slick that the black-haired female spread there mixing with your spit, the taste of her lingering on your tongue. You toyed with the hardened bud, alternating between caressing it with your tongue, harshly sucking on it, or nibbling on it softly.Â
Zayneâs head fell back onto the pillows, raven hair spilling around her, the harsh contrast in color causing the blush of her cheeks to be extremely noticeable.Â
âNot so rough, jasmine. Iâm not going anywhere.â Zayne said at a particularly grueling suck.
Every moan, mewl, whine, and cry caused vibrations to travel from her sensitive nipple to her sopping cunt. Zayneâs gummy walls fluttered, the empty feeling leaving her frustrated. Sheâd have to take up Caleb on her offer after the two of them put you to bed, as the current moment was about you.Â
She could tell you were close as your suckling would lose its rhythm and her teat kept falling from your mouth before you hastily shoved it back into your mouth. Desperate and needy, your oral fixation was being satisfied while your sloppy hole was stretched and filled.Â
âDâyou like how jiejie and mommy take care of you, pips? Need mommyâs tits and jiejieâs cock?â Calebâs form curled over yours, her words brushing along your ear when she spoke. âAlways so good and needy for us.âÂ
Squeezing Zayneâs tit with your hand as the other was too busy being lavished by your tongue, you begrudgingly let it fall from your mouth as both your loversâ names fell from your lips in a breathy tone.Â
Your breathing was picking up, toes curling, and hips pushing back against the purple strap as you tried to take jeijei deeper into your warm pussy.
âLook at you. Canât get enough of us, can you?â
You whined and shook your head.
âPleaseâŚneed itâŚneed to c-cumâŚâ
With your head on Zayneâs chest, you looked up at her, eyes pleading.Â
âBeen a good girl, m-mommy. Can cum, r-right?â
âCourse. Whatever you want, jasmine.â
Angling your hips and causing Caleb to scratch the itch growing in your lower belly, it took only a few more precise thrusts before you found yourself drenching Calebâs dick in your cream and lathering Zayneâs chest with open-mouth kisses.Â
The two older females spoke in hush tones, cooing and shushing as you came down from your high, you lay there, enjoying the attention they lavished on you. Caleb was quick to clean up the mess between your legs while Zayne offered you sips from your water bottle, which they kept filled with ice-cold water on your nightstand.
You remained in Zayneâs embrace, covered in a warm blanket, and cheek smushed against her tit as you slowly drifted off. Once you were asleep, the two made sure to put you in a comfortable position, tucked away in the bed you shared.Â
Caleb moved over to the dresser, going to pull out a spaghetti strap and pajama bottoms, but was stopped by Zayne, who pressed herself up against the younger female.
âDonât get dressed just yet,â Zayne smirked as she felt Calebâs figure shiver when she brushed her lips along the expanse of Calebâs neck. âDonât you want the chance to fuck me like a brute?â
Caleb smiled, looking at Zayne through the mirror before them. She couldnât help the little voice in her head that spoke, pleased with how her day had turned out.Â
'Must be my birthday or something.'
I love boobs and want them in my mouth 24/7 so naturally I wrote this...anyways, not edited as usual.
sypnosis: a night out with your best friend caleb ends how it usually does, rubbing your pussies together all night!
content: fem!caleb donât like donât read, if you donât like fem!lads then this isnât the blog for you. big boob caleb, caleb in a miniskirt, reader wears mini shorts, wlw, best friends caleb and reader, best friends who fuck, best friends who are also possessive of each other, touchy in an uber, oral (r and c receiving), reader likes it messy tbh, big clit fat pussy caleb, they both canât stfu, scissoring!!, mating press scissoring?, squirting (r and c), lots of fluids, theyâre playful w each other, reader loves calebâs boobs and wants to be suffocated in them (me projecting), mention of round 3 (i had to stop at some point), too many mentions of calebâs pussy, interchangeable use of cunt & pussy, not proof read, one mention of abuse but no actual abuse just a reference to being marked up
wc: 3.4k
yap: whew⌠blacked out when i wrote this iâm not even joking, i let the voices take over and i think it turned out okay! i fear iâm gonna be posting fem!lads bc theyâre hot? i actually kinda love this one heh.. @luvinbloom @xinghuisknight my pookie biscuits who listened to me speak on this
the music pounded deep in your chest, flashing colored lights occasionally showing glimpses of peoples faces. your pregame shots had dwindled down to a comfortable buzz, warming your insides and curling on the edge of your mind. your small circle was on the edges of the dance floor, loud voices and flushed cheeks making a smile stay permanently on your face.
"c'mon, let's dance!"
caleb called out as she held your hand, purple eyes shining bright as her head tilted toward the crowd. nodding in agreement you let yourself be dragged away, hand tight in your best friends as she pushed past sweaty bodies for you. your eyes trailed down her body, teeth digging into your lip at the way her mini skirt shifted with her movement, flashing you her thin panties that were in your favorite color.
you were also wearing her favorite color against your cunt right now.
caleb came to a stop and spun around, an easy smile on her face as she started dancing, body swaying to the beat. your own body began moving, hips swaying and ass shaking as you let the atmosphere take over, mind emptying in the hot club. you were locked in eye contact with caleb, her tall frame blocking out anything that wasn't her.
"you havin fun honey?" she yelled over the music, body inching close so she could hear you. unsure if you were warm from the bodies around you or if it was the proximity to her, you laughed softly, hands coming to rest on her hips. tugging her closer, you were chest to chest, the plush of her breasts pushing up as you squished together.
"'course i am, i always have fun when you're around." you tease, guiding her hips in time with yours. you both followed into what was comfortable, many nights grinding against each other in clubs or at parties making you move like clockwork. your eyes flickered around before a smirk curled on your lips, "i think someone else is enjoying the view."
caleb didn't even follow your gaze, simply laughing at your words, breath fanning across your face. "maaaybe they're lookin at you and your sexy thighs in your tiny little shorts." to make her point her hand moves down the curve of your ass to your thighs, copping a squeeze on the way there.
laughing, your gaze drops to her chest. she wore a dark patterned mesh long sleeve, showing off her entire upper body except for her boobs held by a simple dark purple braâ and even then her boobs were definitely making an appearance tonight. "maaaybe they're lookin at your fat tits."
a pinch to your ass made you yelp and glare at her, she didn't look apologetic at all. "you like these fat tits." caleb teased, voice dropping as her lips brushed against the cusp of your ear. you couldn't even refute her statement because it was true, you spent half your time buried in her chest with a smile on your face.
"yeah and you like that i like 'em."
caleb shrugs, standing back to her full height and spinning around. her ass presses against you, hips pushing back to grind against your front. pushing your hips against her ass your hand comes to rest on her stomach, palm warm against the scratchy material.
getting lost in the music the world outside your bubble disappears, the only thing you can feel and see is your best friend. time passes, minutes or an hour you don't know, all you do know is that your buzz is wearing off and your feet are getting tired.
"m'ready to head out baby." you speak into caleb's ear, meeting her soft gaze. she nods and leads you back toward your friends, hugs and squeals of goodbye filling the circle before you're feeling the cool breeze of the night.
the music still thumps behind you as you wipe at your chest, a light sheen of sweat covering the skin. "this way honey." caleb helps you into an uber, saying brief greetings before the car is on the way. music filters loud enough through the speakers that you have to stay close to caleb.
"i need a shower so baaad."
"take one with me? i wanna lay down and you take forever."
you pout up at her, nose scrunching when she pinches your warm cheek. "i don't take forever." you grumble, pushing your head into her damp neck. her hand feels up your thigh, big palm squeezing the fat and kneading it like a cat.
"sure you don't." she sighs out when your lips start planting wet kisses against her neck. crossing her legs she tilts her head to give you more space, hand wandering to the inside of your thigh and caressing the sensitive skin.
this was your normal, kissing your best friend âdrunk or soberâ and feeling each other up like you were a couple. not wanting to get freaky with someone else near, she keeps her hand there, simply letting you mouth at her neck as much as you wanted.
your head started to dip lower when the car came to a stop, a lazy smirk on your lips when you get out and head up to caleb's apartment. you cling to each other the whole way there, teasing touches and soft words that make tingles go down your spine.
after kicking your shoes off you beeline straight for her room, fingers already working to take off your accessories. caleb comes in a minute later, bare feet padding on the floor and hands full of snacks and water.
your stomach growls at the sight earning you a laugh from caleb. she's sat on the bed, skirt spread open and showing off her panties. climbing on the bed, your knees come on either side of her, straddling her lap and wrapping your arms around her neck. her hands come to your ass, grabbing handfuls as she smirks up at you.
"thought you wanted to shower?"
kissing up her neck, you catch her shiny lips in a deep kiss, feeling her moan vibrate into your mouth. her tongue slips into your mouth, the warm muscle massaging against yours. the kiss turns messy, spit dribbling from your lips and the sound of your tongue against hers fills the room.
her hands guide you to move, rocking your clothed cunt against her lap making you moan into her. using your weight you lean forward, forcing her to lay flat on the bed. she looked beautiful like this, eyes dazed and her hair fanned out around her.
"these are pissing me off." she said as she tugged at your clothesâ quite literally your top and shorts. smacking a kiss on her lips you sit up, pulling your thin top over your head, boobs falling once they're free as her fingers worked at your shorts.
"i shouldn't be the only one."
caleb laughed softly at your pout, clumsily taking her shirt off as you adjusted to shimmy out of your shorts. her fingers played with the edge of your panties, snapping the band against you softly.
"fuck, i love when you wear my color against this cute pussy."
clenching around nothing, you grind softly against her abdomen, more of a mindless movement to ease the tension in your clit. her eyes darkened as she watched, hands tugging you up her body to hover over her face.
"c'mere honey, sit on my face."
not even hesitating you lowered, head titled down to watch as she kissed up your cunt. caleb's tongue licked fat stripes up the flimsy material, suckling softly to get a taste of your arousal. her fingers wrapped around the edge before you heard a loud riiiip, the cool air she blew against your cunt making you shiver.
"caleb! you have got to stop ripping my fucking panties!" you whined out, glaring at her when you felt her smile against you. she placed kisses against your clit before bringing it into her mouth and sucking it like one of her lemon candies.
"sorry honey," she mumbled against your wet folds, dipping her tongue through them. "i'll make it up to you." she pushed her face up, tongue slipping into your hole and nose pushing against your clit.
moaning softly, your hips rocked gently against her, clenching around her tongue as she thrusted it in and out. reaching a hand back, you pushed her bra down, mouth watering as her boobs spilled out and jiggled lightly with her movements.
you grabbed onto the fat, rolling her pretty nipple between your fingers. caleb moaned against you, a wet smack resounding between you as she pulled away, head dropping against the bed as you continued to play with her nipples.
"m'sensitive honey- shit."
smirking down at her you lifted yourself off of her face, moving down her body and licking at her wet face. "wanna play with you too~" you said, lips pressing kisses against her skin as you made your way down her body.
your lips brushed against her nipple, lips catching onto the perked bud before you sucked it into your mouth. caleb whimpered, fingers lacing into your hair as you mouthed at her tits. pulling off with a loud pop you continued your descent, sucking dark marks along her skin.
her skirt was flipped up, panties in your favorite color darkened by her arousal. "mmm~ i love when you make a mess for me cay." you said as you slipped her out of her bottoms, spreading her legs wide to stare at her twitching pussy.
you dove in, tongue slipping out and jaw hung open to greedily gulp at her wetness. her fingers tightened around your hair, back arching as you sloppily made out with her cunt, wads of spit dripping from your mouth and down her ass.
"fuckin love this fat pussy even more." spitting against her cunt, you sucked her big clit harshly, head shaking side to side. caleb moaned loudly, hips bucking up making you follow the movement before letting go.
you could feel your arousal dripping down your pussy as you watched her clit fall back into place, fat hood twitching. burying your face in her puffy folds one last time, for fun of it, tongue gathering up the fresh slick dribbling out.
her hand fell from your hair as you pulled away, moving to lean over her panting body. "ride this pussy, wanna feel you against me." she said as you got into position, one leg over hers in the classic scissoring pose. she hooked a leg around your ass, holding you up as you lowered down.
both of you moaned out at the contact, the heat of your pussies making your mind hazy. all you could think about was her, how wet she felt against you, how her fat clit rubbed against yours in that delicious way that had your toes curling.
holding the leg in front of you, your hips rocked a steady pace against hers, whimpering at the loud smacks resonating from your cunts. "fuck this pussyâ yeah, juust like that, you love f-feeling myâshitâfat pussy on you honey?"
you moan through a laugh at her words, hand coming to rest against her toned stomach. "fuuuck, you know i do baby. love how loud she gets for me- fuels my ego." you bat your eyes at your best friend, leaking more at her smirk.
caleb grabs her tits, holding the bouncing fat as her fingers tweak her darkened nipples. "that's my job." you tease, circling your hips just right to get her to whine out for you.
"y'seem busy, just helping you out~"
caleb's hips start bucking up, helping grind her pussy against yours. sweat drips down your bodies, thighs tensing and ass jiggling from your thrusts. "well then, keep playing with 'em for me yeah?" you smile sweetly at her, watching as she does what you said.
the bed creaks softly with your thrusts, not that you notice. your thoughts are only about you and caleb, how close you both were to cumming. you loved when nights out ended up like this, both of you playing with each others cunt until you were so overstimulated it almost hurt to breathe.
that familiar coil twisted up in your gut, hips pushing harder against her cunt. fuck she felt so good, how her clit caught juust right against yours, wet smacks ringing in your ears from how wet you both were. "g'nna cum baby, want my cum all over you?" you panted out.
caleb's head nodded frantically, hips working harder to bring you both closer. "yeah, yeah, wanna feel you stick to me- w'nna feel you twitch against me." her words have you moaning out, a few more grinds of your hips and your head is thrown back, a moan of her name leaving your mouth.
caleb moans with you, fingers pinching hard at her nipples as she feels your clit twitch violenty against hers, sending her into her own orgasm. "honey, please- fuck." she can't even form a sentence as you keep moving against her, working you both through your highs.
panting, your hips slow their rocking as you take a look at your best friend. her face was flushed red, lips red from her teeth and her nipples so hard from her pulling.
bracing against her and the bed you slowly lift off of her, your moans mixing at the thick, creamy strands that stick your pussies together. her pussy was painted in your mixed release, white smeared allll around her fat clit and dripping down her puffy folds.
"my turn~" caleb says as she sits up, holding you close and flipping your positions. you tilt your head up to kiss her, hand resting against her neck as you spread your legs. caleb settles between them before she pushes them back, folding them to your chest and exposing your pretty cunt to her greedy stare.
she resists taking a lick and mounts you, slotting her fat pussy against yours like a missing puzzle piece. your clit twitches against hers at her heat and she begins grinding, your pussies spreading wide in this position.
caleb leans over you, big boobs swinging right in your face as she stimulates you. hands gripping her ass, your lips catch onto a nipple, cheeks hollowing as you suck it deep into your warm mouth.
she moans loudly, pressing your thighs further down with her weight. the angle makes your pussies smack against each other louder, holes leaking and trying to grab onto each other. the feeling of her puffy lips spread apart has you whining against her nipple, eyes looking up at her.
"fuck- can't look at me like that honey, makes me wanna fuck you until you can't walk, until all you know is my name and how my pussy makes you feel."
releasing her nipple, you pant against the other one. "do it. w'nna mould our pussies together forever~ never wanna leave here." your weird words makes her laugh hotly, teeth coming to bite at your calf.
"you have such a way with words." she teases, watching your tongue flick around her swinging nipple like a kitten with a toy. you have that glint in your eyes, the one that tells her she's going to spend all night right here and wake up later with stiff muscles.
"y'love it!"
your lips finally wrap around her nipple and your head bobs as you suck, heavy lidded eyes boring into hers. she feels you move, feels your hips tilt until your cunts are matched up perfectly, the obnoxious smacking of your folds against hers sending shivers down her spine.
your hands find purchase on her back, nails digging into the shifting muscles and dragging down the expanse of it. "shit! g'nna walk outta here bruised up and people are g'nna think something bad."
her words have you giggling around the bud before you let go, nails digging into her back again. "nooo~ they're gonna know how good you fuck me." your smile has her clenching around nothing, cursing under her breath.
"you like thatâ like when people know it was you who fucked me so good i can't walk, you who makes my throat sore from screaming your name alll night long."
your words were true. caleb loved when your legs trembled slightly as you walked around the mall, when peoples eyebrows furrowed at her possessive grip on your waist and her smug smirk when you rasped out your words.
"buuuut i'm the same. i like when people see the marks i left on you, the bites you show off so proudly for everyone to see, how you let me boss you around."
you loved when caleb walked around with your marks on display for the whole world to see. loved the way men's gazes averted once they saw the hickeys littering her chest, loved when that flash of recognition crossed their face as she did exactly what you told her to.
caleb was moaning loudly, hips canting hard and fast, so fast you could feel your mixed arousal smearing around your thighs and dripping down your ass.
white hot pleasure twisted tight inside of you, bubbling up and causing your stomach to tighten. "fuck baby, you're gonna make me cum. pleaseplease make me cum?" your begging has her cooing, hand coming to push away sweaty strands of hair stuck to your face.
"g'ahead honey, soak me, make me a fucking mess."
your nails dig into her neck as you pull her closer, leaning up so you can capture her lips in a messy kiss. the band in your stomach snaps, a guttural moan tearing through your throat as your pussy gushes against her.
the feeling of your wetness shooting against her has caleb moaning into your mouth, tongue licking away the strand of spit from your lips and she looks down. your squirt splashes against her, wet droplets reaching your mound from her thrusts.
"fucking- god honey-"
your fingers play with her sore nipple sends her over the edge, the sound of her own cunt gushing out has you meaning along with her. hips still rocking, your clit twitches in overstimulation, small spurts of squirt pushing out as her forehead drops onto yours.
you can hear the drip, drip of your squirts leak down your bodies and onto the bed. caleb whimpers into your mouth and you cup her face, pulling back to wipe at the sweat beading down her face. legs trembling, you go boneless once she moves off of you, her own thighs quivering.
caleb flops onto the bed next to you and you cling to her, propped onto your side and fingers pushing her hair away from her neck. "fuck." is all she says as her gaze sluggishly makes its way to you, pupils blown wide and eyes glazed over. you doubt you look any better.
"yeah, fuck. my pussy is so sticky."
caleb laughs, glancing down at your mound so you spread your legs for her. your cunt was painted in white and slicked wet, clit twitching uncontrollably and folds so puffy.
"thought you wanted that?" she questions and quirks an eyebrow at you. you giggle and roll onto her body, legs straddling her thigh and head coming to her chest.
"m'not complaining! though she's starting to miss you~"
"you insatiable freak."
caleb props her head against the pillows and looks down at you. you had your head squished âliterally squishedâ between her tits, hands holding the fat around your head. little happy, content noises vibrated into her skin makes her shake her head as she reached for her phone.
"m'gonna order some food, you want anything in particular?"
your head started to pull away when she spoke again, "and don't say my pussy."
it was silent before you pushed your head back between her tits. caleb brought a hand to your hip as they began to rock against her thigh. she clicked through the delivery app and moved on autopilot to order, clicking the phone off once it went through.
"round three in the shower?"
for someone who couldn't feel their legs a minute ago you shot up, hand pulling caleb to follow you into the bathroom. "wanna ride your face!" you quipped and she felt wetness drip down her leg. it was going to be a long night.
did u make it to the end?? the way i wanted to keep this going but i literally had to stop at some point since thereâs no plotâŚ
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sypnosis: a night out with your best friend caleb ends how it usually does, rubbing your pussies together all night!
content: fem!caleb donât like donât read, if you donât like fem!lads then this isnât the blog for you. big boob caleb, caleb in a miniskirt, reader wears mini shorts, wlw, best friends caleb and reader, best friends who fuck, best friends who are also possessive of each other, touchy in an uber, oral (r and c receiving), reader likes it messy tbh, big clit fat pussy caleb, they both canât stfu, scissoring!!, mating press scissoring?, squirting (r and c), lots of fluids, theyâre playful w each other, reader loves calebâs boobs and wants to be suffocated in them (me projecting), mention of round 3 (i had to stop at some point), too many mentions of calebâs pussy, interchangeable use of cunt & pussy, not proof read, one mention of abuse but no actual abuse just a reference to being marked up
wc: 3.4k
yap: whew⌠blacked out when i wrote this iâm not even joking, i let the voices take over and i think it turned out okay! i fear iâm gonna be posting fem!lads bc theyâre hot? i actually kinda love this one heh.. @luvinbloom @xinghuisknight my pookie biscuits who listened to me speak on this
the music pounded deep in your chest, flashing colored lights occasionally showing glimpses of peoples faces. your pregame shots had dwindled down to a comfortable buzz, warming your insides and curling on the edge of your mind. your small circle was on the edges of the dance floor, loud voices and flushed cheeks making a smile stay permanently on your face.
"c'mon, let's dance!"
caleb called out as she held your hand, purple eyes shining bright as her head tilted toward the crowd. nodding in agreement you let yourself be dragged away, hand tight in your best friends as she pushed past sweaty bodies for you. your eyes trailed down her body, teeth digging into your lip at the way her mini skirt shifted with her movement, flashing you her thin panties that were in your favorite color.
you were also wearing her favorite color against your cunt right now.
caleb came to a stop and spun around, an easy smile on her face as she started dancing, body swaying to the beat. your own body began moving, hips swaying and ass shaking as you let the atmosphere take over, mind emptying in the hot club. you were locked in eye contact with caleb, her tall frame blocking out anything that wasn't her.
"you havin fun honey?" she yelled over the music, body inching close so she could hear you. unsure if you were warm from the bodies around you or if it was the proximity to her, you laughed softly, hands coming to rest on her hips. tugging her closer, you were chest to chest, the plush of her breasts pushing up as you squished together.
"'course i am, i always have fun when you're around." you tease, guiding her hips in time with yours. you both followed into what was comfortable, many nights grinding against each other in clubs or at parties making you move like clockwork. your eyes flickered around before a smirk curled on your lips, "i think someone else is enjoying the view."
caleb didn't even follow your gaze, simply laughing at your words, breath fanning across your face. "maaaybe they're lookin at you and your sexy thighs in your tiny little shorts." to make her point her hand moves down the curve of your ass to your thighs, copping a squeeze on the way there.
laughing, your gaze drops to her chest. she wore a dark patterned mesh long sleeve, showing off her entire upper body except for her boobs held by a simple dark purple braâ and even then her boobs were definitely making an appearance tonight. "maaaybe they're lookin at your fat tits."
a pinch to your ass made you yelp and glare at her, she didn't look apologetic at all. "you like these fat tits." caleb teased, voice dropping as her lips brushed against the cusp of your ear. you couldn't even refute her statement because it was true, you spent half your time buried in her chest with a smile on your face.
"yeah and you like that i like 'em."
caleb shrugs, standing back to her full height and spinning around. her ass presses against you, hips pushing back to grind against your front. pushing your hips against her ass your hand comes to rest on her stomach, palm warm against the scratchy material.
getting lost in the music the world outside your bubble disappears, the only thing you can feel and see is your best friend. time passes, minutes or an hour you don't know, all you do know is that your buzz is wearing off and your feet are getting tired.
"m'ready to head out baby." you speak into caleb's ear, meeting her soft gaze. she nods and leads you back toward your friends, hugs and squeals of goodbye filling the circle before you're feeling the cool breeze of the night.
the music still thumps behind you as you wipe at your chest, a light sheen of sweat covering the skin. "this way honey." caleb helps you into an uber, saying brief greetings before the car is on the way. music filters loud enough through the speakers that you have to stay close to caleb.
"i need a shower so baaad."
"take one with me? i wanna lay down and you take forever."
you pout up at her, nose scrunching when she pinches your warm cheek. "i don't take forever." you grumble, pushing your head into her damp neck. her hand feels up your thigh, big palm squeezing the fat and kneading it like a cat.
"sure you don't." she sighs out when your lips start planting wet kisses against her neck. crossing her legs she tilts her head to give you more space, hand wandering to the inside of your thigh and caressing the sensitive skin.
this was your normal, kissing your best friend âdrunk or soberâ and feeling each other up like you were a couple. not wanting to get freaky with someone else near, she keeps her hand there, simply letting you mouth at her neck as much as you wanted.
your head started to dip lower when the car came to a stop, a lazy smirk on your lips when you get out and head up to caleb's apartment. you cling to each other the whole way there, teasing touches and soft words that make tingles go down your spine.
after kicking your shoes off you beeline straight for her room, fingers already working to take off your accessories. caleb comes in a minute later, bare feet padding on the floor and hands full of snacks and water.
your stomach growls at the sight earning you a laugh from caleb. she's sat on the bed, skirt spread open and showing off her panties. climbing on the bed, your knees come on either side of her, straddling her lap and wrapping your arms around her neck. her hands come to your ass, grabbing handfuls as she smirks up at you.
"thought you wanted to shower?"
kissing up her neck, you catch her shiny lips in a deep kiss, feeling her moan vibrate into your mouth. her tongue slips into your mouth, the warm muscle massaging against yours. the kiss turns messy, spit dribbling from your lips and the sound of your tongue against hers fills the room.
her hands guide you to move, rocking your clothed cunt against her lap making you moan into her. using your weight you lean forward, forcing her to lay flat on the bed. she looked beautiful like this, eyes dazed and her hair fanned out around her.
"these are pissing me off." she said as she tugged at your clothesâ quite literally your top and shorts. smacking a kiss on her lips you sit up, pulling your thin top over your head, boobs falling once they're free as her fingers worked at your shorts.
"i shouldn't be the only one."
caleb laughed softly at your pout, clumsily taking her shirt off as you adjusted to shimmy out of your shorts. her fingers played with the edge of your panties, snapping the band against you softly.
"fuck, i love when you wear my color against this cute pussy."
clenching around nothing, you grind softly against her abdomen, more of a mindless movement to ease the tension in your clit. her eyes darkened as she watched, hands tugging you up her body to hover over her face.
"c'mere honey, sit on my face."
not even hesitating you lowered, head titled down to watch as she kissed up your cunt. caleb's tongue licked fat stripes up the flimsy material, suckling softly to get a taste of your arousal. her fingers wrapped around the edge before you heard a loud riiiip, the cool air she blew against your cunt making you shiver.
"caleb! you have got to stop ripping my fucking panties!" you whined out, glaring at her when you felt her smile against you. she placed kisses against your clit before bringing it into her mouth and sucking it like one of her lemon candies.
"sorry honey," she mumbled against your wet folds, dipping her tongue through them. "i'll make it up to you." she pushed her face up, tongue slipping into your hole and nose pushing against your clit.
moaning softly, your hips rocked gently against her, clenching around her tongue as she thrusted it in and out. reaching a hand back, you pushed her bra down, mouth watering as her boobs spilled out and jiggled lightly with her movements.
you grabbed onto the fat, rolling her pretty nipple between your fingers. caleb moaned against you, a wet smack resounding between you as she pulled away, head dropping against the bed as you continued to play with her nipples.
"m'sensitive honey- shit."
smirking down at her you lifted yourself off of her face, moving down her body and licking at her wet face. "wanna play with you too~" you said, lips pressing kisses against her skin as you made your way down her body.
your lips brushed against her nipple, lips catching onto the perked bud before you sucked it into your mouth. caleb whimpered, fingers lacing into your hair as you mouthed at her tits. pulling off with a loud pop you continued your descent, sucking dark marks along her skin.
her skirt was flipped up, panties in your favorite color darkened by her arousal. "mmm~ i love when you make a mess for me cay." you said as you slipped her out of her bottoms, spreading her legs wide to stare at her twitching pussy.
you dove in, tongue slipping out and jaw hung open to greedily gulp at her wetness. her fingers tightened around your hair, back arching as you sloppily made out with her cunt, wads of spit dripping from your mouth and down her ass.
"fuckin love this fat pussy even more." spitting against her cunt, you sucked her big clit harshly, head shaking side to side. caleb moaned loudly, hips bucking up making you follow the movement before letting go.
you could feel your arousal dripping down your pussy as you watched her clit fall back into place, fat hood twitching. burying your face in her puffy folds one last time, for fun of it, tongue gathering up the fresh slick dribbling out.
her hand fell from your hair as you pulled away, moving to lean over her panting body. "ride this pussy, wanna feel you against me." she said as you got into position, one leg over hers in the classic scissoring pose. she hooked a leg around your ass, holding you up as you lowered down.
both of you moaned out at the contact, the heat of your pussies making your mind hazy. all you could think about was her, how wet she felt against you, how her fat clit rubbed against yours in that delicious way that had your toes curling.
holding the leg in front of you, your hips rocked a steady pace against hers, whimpering at the loud smacks resonating from your cunts. "fuck this pussyâ yeah, juust like that, you love f-feeling myâshitâfat pussy on you honey?"
you moan through a laugh at her words, hand coming to rest against her toned stomach. "fuuuck, you know i do baby. love how loud she gets for me- fuels my ego." you bat your eyes at your best friend, leaking more at her smirk.
caleb grabs her tits, holding the bouncing fat as her fingers tweak her darkened nipples. "that's my job." you tease, circling your hips just right to get her to whine out for you.
"y'seem busy, just helping you out~"
caleb's hips start bucking up, helping grind her pussy against yours. sweat drips down your bodies, thighs tensing and ass jiggling from your thrusts. "well then, keep playing with 'em for me yeah?" you smile sweetly at her, watching as she does what you said.
the bed creaks softly with your thrusts, not that you notice. your thoughts are only about you and caleb, how close you both were to cumming. you loved when nights out ended up like this, both of you playing with each others cunt until you were so overstimulated it almost hurt to breathe.
that familiar coil twisted up in your gut, hips pushing harder against her cunt. fuck she felt so good, how her clit caught juust right against yours, wet smacks ringing in your ears from how wet you both were. "g'nna cum baby, want my cum all over you?" you panted out.
caleb's head nodded frantically, hips working harder to bring you both closer. "yeah, yeah, wanna feel you stick to me- w'nna feel you twitch against me." her words have you moaning out, a few more grinds of your hips and your head is thrown back, a moan of her name leaving your mouth.
caleb moans with you, fingers pinching hard at her nipples as she feels your clit twitch violenty against hers, sending her into her own orgasm. "honey, please- fuck." she can't even form a sentence as you keep moving against her, working you both through your highs.
panting, your hips slow their rocking as you take a look at your best friend. her face was flushed red, lips red from her teeth and her nipples so hard from her pulling.
bracing against her and the bed you slowly lift off of her, your moans mixing at the thick, creamy strands that stick your pussies together. her pussy was painted in your mixed release, white smeared allll around her fat clit and dripping down her puffy folds.
"my turn~" caleb says as she sits up, holding you close and flipping your positions. you tilt your head up to kiss her, hand resting against her neck as you spread your legs. caleb settles between them before she pushes them back, folding them to your chest and exposing your pretty cunt to her greedy stare.
she resists taking a lick and mounts you, slotting her fat pussy against yours like a missing puzzle piece. your clit twitches against hers at her heat and she begins grinding, your pussies spreading wide in this position.
caleb leans over you, big boobs swinging right in your face as she stimulates you. hands gripping her ass, your lips catch onto a nipple, cheeks hollowing as you suck it deep into your warm mouth.
she moans loudly, pressing your thighs further down with her weight. the angle makes your pussies smack against each other louder, holes leaking and trying to grab onto each other. the feeling of her puffy lips spread apart has you whining against her nipple, eyes looking up at her.
"fuck- can't look at me like that honey, makes me wanna fuck you until you can't walk, until all you know is my name and how my pussy makes you feel."
releasing her nipple, you pant against the other one. "do it. w'nna mould our pussies together forever~ never wanna leave here." your weird words makes her laugh hotly, teeth coming to bite at your calf.
"you have such a way with words." she teases, watching your tongue flick around her swinging nipple like a kitten with a toy. you have that glint in your eyes, the one that tells her she's going to spend all night right here and wake up later with stiff muscles.
"y'love it!"
your lips finally wrap around her nipple and your head bobs as you suck, heavy lidded eyes boring into hers. she feels you move, feels your hips tilt until your cunts are matched up perfectly, the obnoxious smacking of your folds against hers sending shivers down her spine.
your hands find purchase on her back, nails digging into the shifting muscles and dragging down the expanse of it. "shit! g'nna walk outta here bruised up and people are g'nna think something bad."
her words have you giggling around the bud before you let go, nails digging into her back again. "nooo~ they're gonna know how good you fuck me." your smile has her clenching around nothing, cursing under her breath.
"you like thatâ like when people know it was you who fucked me so good i can't walk, you who makes my throat sore from screaming your name alll night long."
your words were true. caleb loved when your legs trembled slightly as you walked around the mall, when peoples eyebrows furrowed at her possessive grip on your waist and her smug smirk when you rasped out your words.
"buuuut i'm the same. i like when people see the marks i left on you, the bites you show off so proudly for everyone to see, how you let me boss you around."
you loved when caleb walked around with your marks on display for the whole world to see. loved the way men's gazes averted once they saw the hickeys littering her chest, loved when that flash of recognition crossed their face as she did exactly what you told her to.
caleb was moaning loudly, hips canting hard and fast, so fast you could feel your mixed arousal smearing around your thighs and dripping down your ass.
white hot pleasure twisted tight inside of you, bubbling up and causing your stomach to tighten. "fuck baby, you're gonna make me cum. pleaseplease make me cum?" your begging has her cooing, hand coming to push away sweaty strands of hair stuck to your face.
"g'ahead honey, soak me, make me a fucking mess."
your nails dig into her neck as you pull her closer, leaning up so you can capture her lips in a messy kiss. the band in your stomach snaps, a guttural moan tearing through your throat as your pussy gushes against her.
the feeling of your wetness shooting against her has caleb moaning into your mouth, tongue licking away the strand of spit from your lips and she looks down. your squirt splashes against her, wet droplets reaching your mound from her thrusts.
"fucking- god honey-"
your fingers play with her sore nipple sends her over the edge, the sound of her own cunt gushing out has you meaning along with her. hips still rocking, your clit twitches in overstimulation, small spurts of squirt pushing out as her forehead drops onto yours.
you can hear the drip, drip of your squirts leak down your bodies and onto the bed. caleb whimpers into your mouth and you cup her face, pulling back to wipe at the sweat beading down her face. legs trembling, you go boneless once she moves off of you, her own thighs quivering.
caleb flops onto the bed next to you and you cling to her, propped onto your side and fingers pushing her hair away from her neck. "fuck." is all she says as her gaze sluggishly makes its way to you, pupils blown wide and eyes glazed over. you doubt you look any better.
"yeah, fuck. my pussy is so sticky."
caleb laughs, glancing down at your mound so you spread your legs for her. your cunt was painted in white and slicked wet, clit twitching uncontrollably and folds so puffy.
"thought you wanted that?" she questions and quirks an eyebrow at you. you giggle and roll onto her body, legs straddling her thigh and head coming to her chest.
"m'not complaining! though she's starting to miss you~"
"you insatiable freak."
caleb props her head against the pillows and looks down at you. you had your head squished âliterally squishedâ between her tits, hands holding the fat around your head. little happy, content noises vibrated into her skin makes her shake her head as she reached for her phone.
"m'gonna order some food, you want anything in particular?"
your head started to pull away when she spoke again, "and don't say my pussy."
it was silent before you pushed your head back between her tits. caleb brought a hand to your hip as they began to rock against her thigh. she clicked through the delivery app and moved on autopilot to order, clicking the phone off once it went through.
"round three in the shower?"
for someone who couldn't feel their legs a minute ago you shot up, hand pulling caleb to follow you into the bathroom. "wanna ride your face!" you quipped and she felt wetness drip down her leg. it was going to be a long night.
did u make it to the end?? the way i wanted to keep this going but i literally had to stop at some point since thereâs no plotâŚ
maintenance day â suggestive [cw] body horror (?)
a/n. based off of this mutualâs art (please check them out! (@applepuppy77)). sorry if there are mechanical inconsistencies, this is out of my profession. iâve only tinkered with my pc before
âCaleb, are you sure you donât want a break⌠youâre panting a lotâŚâÂ
Thereâs a strained smile on Calebâs face, thick eyebrows furrowed as beads of sweat line his forehead and drip down his cheeks.Â
ââŚCaleb?âÂ
âHah⌠Iâm fine, pips. Keep going.â The quiet whirl of the mechanical parts that make up his abdomen fills the silence, mingling with Calebâs uneven breaths.Â
âIâm nervous, you have to tell me when it hurts, okay?â You bite your lip, picking up the circuit board with care. âYou know Iâve only worked on your arm before⌠what if I mess up?âÂ
âYouâll be okay,â Caleb assures you, lashes fanning his cheeks. His eyes are hazy, half focused on his open stomach, and half focused on you. âIâll guide you if you need help. Just⌠trust your instincts and remember the techniques from when you helped me with my arm.âÂ
You shuffle to make yourself comfortable in his lap once more, trying to ease the stiffness in your body. âOkay. Iâm going to install the piece now. Ready?âÂ
âReady.âÂ
With slow movements, you carefully insert the mechanism until you hear a click, narrating as you go. âItâs in. I need to make sure itâs stable though, tell me to stop if it hurts or feels weird.âÂ
Fighting to keep still Caleb leans forwards, smile wavering. âTighten the south bolt tighter than the others. There should be a red mark on it. It loosens too easily.âÂ
The system is glaringly more complex than his arm, multi-coloured wires threading around the main central core in the middle. You let your eyes trail down towards the bolt he mentioned, nodding.Â
âMkay. Tightening it now.â Taking a deep breath to stop your hand from shaking, you take the small wrench and lean in, a tight furrow between your brows.Â
The second you touch the metal connecting his main system to the circuit, Caleb jerks forward, a breathy gasp escaping his lips. His hand curls around the lower half of his face, muffling his sounds as he flushes red of either embarrassment or arousal.Â
âHah⌠pips. SlowâŚhaaah⌠down, fuck.â He curses when you tighten the bolt while heâs somewhat distracted, his head jerking back and ramming into the wall behind him.Â
âItâs doneâŚ! Did it hurt? Sorry, I thought it might be better if I was slightly quicker.âÂ
âNo, it was only a pinch.â Calebâs cheeks burn a brighter red and his eyes have yet to clear, still glazed over. They dart away from yours when they make contact. âMind helping me close up?âÂ
âMhm,â you say absentmindedly, mind wandering elsewhere. âMasochist.âÂ
âIâŚaha, whaâ?âÂ
Your fingers inch forward again to trail down the stabilizing rod, letting your fingertips trace each ridge and texture. The whirling of the fan gets louder as he overheats, his eyes widening at the betrayal.Â
After a moment Calebâs eyes drift shut, shuddering as his hand reaches out to grasp your wrist, though not stopping you.Â
âYouâre not going to stop me?âÂ
âYou know I wonât. You can do whatever you want to me, Iâd take it all.âÂ
He lets your curious fingers wander, body tightening beneath you when your touch reaches the newly installed component, vibration humming through the metal.Â
âAhââÂ
The sound escapes him before he can stop it, eyelids fluttering shut.Â
âSensitive?âÂ
âNo,â he says quickly. You raise an eyebrow. âMaybe a little,â he admits.Â
âA little⌠hm?âÂ
Calebâs throat bobs as he subconsciously spreads his thighs apart below you. Your fingers brush a bundle of colored wiring near his core, and he jolts. The reaction is immediate, and the lights beneath his synthetic organs flicker erratically.Â
âWow,â you whisper before you can help it.Â
âHah, donât...â His voice comes out wrecked, breathless around the edges. âYouâre making it worse.â
âWorse?â you echo, as your thumb strokes carefully along one of the wires. A shudder tears through him.
âFuck.â The mechanical whir deepens in pitch, and his hold on your wrist tightens.Â
âCaleb?âÂ
âThatâs⌠thatâs enough,â he pants, voice strained.Â
âPainful?â You pull away, watching him carefully.
âSomething like that.â He motions for you to close up his abdomen, sighing in relief when heâs finally protected from all your teasing. Calebâs arms loop around your waist as if he doesnât want you to move away yet, holding you tightly against his chest. âThank you, pipsqueak.âÂ
You lean into him, humming in response. âYou know I could have turned you off?âÂ
âIf itâs you touching me, I want to experience all of it,â he murmurs, nose brushing your shoulder. âHelp me next week?âÂ
You sigh affectionately. âSure.â
xiayizhou04âs masterlist âą applepuppy77âs art
warnings. fluff, kind of crack, boss x employee dynamic, caleb is WHIPPED, caleb is also really clingy, reader is an #ihatemybf warrior (in the most loving way possible), suggestive, established relationship
preview. caleb's texts with assistant!reader throughout the day.
a/n. this is just an experimental SMAU spin off for these fics since people wanted more of their dynamic :) enjoy! part 1 part 2
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childhood bestfriends caleb and nonMC!reader, who he's secretly in love with while she thinks he likes someone else
warnings. angst, fluff, rejection, she fell first he fell harder, caleb is down bad, groveling, miscommunication, caleb sucks at feelings, slow burn, childhood friends to lovers, he gives her a nickname adjacent to pipsqueak
preview. "I love you," he says, pressing his forehead against yours. You want to tell him that it's not fair to treat you the way he does and expect you not to fall for him. That holding your hair when you vomit, falling asleep at your bedside when you're sick, and his eyes closing in on you in any room is not fair. "Then prove it to me."
wc. 8.4k (she's hefty...)
You proposed to Caleb for the first time when you were nine years old, with a flower ring.
The winter air had nipped at your flushed cheeks as you stepped into ice, holding it out to him. Your breath had puffed into the air like a dragon, and you nuzzled your chin further into the wool of your scarf to keep warm. It had been the only flower left after fall had faded away, yet its white petals stood brilliantly in between your fingertips, weathering against the cold.
The child in front of you was closed off. Eyes narrowed, fists balled inside his pockets, and usually adorning a solemn look on his face. Though, it had certainly gotten better since you first met him as one of Grandma Josephineâs adoptive children. Back then, he hadnât even spoken muchâonly keeping MC tight at his side, as if she might disappear if he didnât. He wasnât rude by any meansâŚjust, cautious. Too aware for a child of his age.
But without a doubt in your mind, he was the most handsome boy youâd ever seen.
Heâd raised his brows. âYou just met me last week.â
âItâs love at first sight.â
He rejected you, naturally, but it did little to make a dent in your childish heart. Not when his purple hues gazed into your own, with a softness that didnât seem intent on hurting you.
The next two decades becomes a perpetual cycle of this encounterâin which you learn that Caleb is a very caring person.
In that time, you learn a lot about him, aside from his gorgeous face. You find that heâs fond of nicknames. Pipsqueak for MC. Splints for you, when you launched yourself off a swing and broke your wrist trying to impress him. Safe to say, it didnât impress anyone but your doctor, who was baffled you managed to fly so high into the air with your 11-year-old legs. Caleb held your other hand tight in the emergency room as you wailed helplessly, waiting for the doctor to ease the pain. Youâd be lying if you said you didnât cry just a tad longer to keep your hand in his.
âThis thing is so ugly,â you whine, picking at your cast as he walks you back home. âDo you think Iâm gross now, Caleb?â
âItâs not ugly. You need it to get better.â
âI thought youâd fall in love with me if I went high enough,â you sniffle fake tears, which he reads in an instant. âI did go pretty high up, though. So maybe you like me at least.â
He laughs, and you scowl, insisting that you arenât joking. So instead, he smiles and holds your free hand in his again. Your heart skips a beat. A childish, but innocent love fluttering in your chest. âCome on, splints. Letâs go watch TV, and I can sign your cast.â
The broken wrist is so worth it.
With MC being two grades lower than the two of you and thus having a different schedule, it doesnât take long before youâre doing practically everything with Caleb. Heâs your seatmate in class, the two of you walk to and from school, and there doesnât seem to be a moment where you arenât glued at the hip. Throughout all of this, you make sure you shoot your shot whenever the chance arisesâeven when it doesnât arise at all.
âYou get any chocolates for Valentineâs?â you ask as you plop down in your seat with your lunch, not-so-conspicuously eyeing his desk as his friends begin to crowd around the two of you. It didnât take long for Caleb to adjust to ordinary school life. After his initial bumpy introduction where he seemed hesitant to get close to anyone his grandma would introduce him to, he was quick to adjust to a level of charisma even you havenât gotten to.Â
By now, heâs charisma personified. You, yourself, have no idea how quickly he adapts to things. Though, you do recall that after an exam measuring his intelligence, he was told he couldnât lower his grade by two years to be with MC. So you suppose heâs rather brightâalmost as much as his face.
âToo many,â one of his friends groan, dragging his hand down the side of his face. âLifeâs so not fair, dude.â
âJust a few,â Caleb laughs, turning to feel me stare at him expectantly. âMost of them are obligatory. I just helped a couple people out during gym.â
You glance at his friends. âHow many is a few?â
âAt least five,â another one grins. He wiggles his eyebrows at you, and his friend snickers at his shoulder. âYou jealous?â
Itâs not like your crush on Caleb is new news. In fact, itâs practically common knowledge at your school, given how open you are with your affection with him. Asking him out with a giant poster on orientation day, sending him notes with hearts littered everywhere during class, and refusing to be subtle when youâre discussing it with your friendsâŚit tends to add up. Most people believe your relationship to be strange, but those who matter thought of it as the norm, so it doesnât really matter.Â
âJealous? I donât think so, why?â
âMost girls would be if their boyfriend got a bunch of chocolates,â he responds, to which Caleb immediately reminds him that youâre not dating. Then his friend sighs. âItâs cute when girls get jealous, isnât it?â
At this, your ears perk.
âShould I be jealous?â you ask Caleb, making his friends erupt into snickers. âDo you think itâs cute too?â
He rolls his eyes and flicks your forehead softly. âDo you ever ask normal questions, splints?â
Throughout your childhood together, everything involves him. Family dinners, graduation, holidays, all of it. Of course, this means that MC is there for all of it too. Youâre helplessly in love, but youâre not stupid. You know what love looks like from the movies their grandma would play on their TV. He cares for her with a different look in his eyes. He protects her with a lovingness in his voice that he doesnât spare for you.Â
The same fingers that flick your forehead touch her arm gingerly, like she could crack in half if he holds too hard. He doesnât touch her very easily either, whereas he often falls asleep with his head fully leaning against your shoulder on the bus ride home. He wakes up at the crack of dawn to make her lunch, while the two of you munch on sandwiches from the school cafeteria during lunch breaks. He scolds you when your clothes are tossed on the ground while he folds hers without her having to ask. He never enters her room to protect her privacy while he lounges in yours like he owns the place.
Your Caleb, you have found, is different from MCâs Caleb.Â
MCâs Caleb is easy to depend on. Trustworthy, perfect, and never makes a mistake for the life of him. He never loses his cool in front of her, never has a hair out of place, lets her win at all the board games, and always has this clear but dazed look in his pretty purple eyes. Your Caleb has none of that. Your Caleb teases you mercilessly when you lose the card game for the fifth time in a row. Your Caleb passes out on his desk while studying for an exam, essentially drooling on his notebook to lie to MC that heâs naturally talented at math. Your Caleb sends you stupid videos about plane models and forces you to sit through a thirty-minute explanation about it.
You know he likes her. He knows you know he likes her. She doesnât know anything at all. All jumbled up, like a wordless pact ready to crumble at any moment.Â
Of course, this means that he prioritizes her over you at times. All the time. Itâs to be expected. Sheâs family, youâre not. Youâve grown used to it, and so has he.
MC doesnât notice though, because she doesnât have to. Because to her, Caleb is just a slightly nagging but cool adoptive brother. Nothing more, nothing less. And youâre one of her childhood friends, and Calebâs best friend. Nothing more, nothing less.
The first year after you graduate high school is a dramatic shift from your cozy hometown. You somehow manage to get into the same college as Calebâand you attribute his tutoring to be the main culpritâthough in different majors. Itâs a lot to convince him to go so far from home given that MC is still at home, but after a lot of reluctant discussion, he agrees.
âTake off your shoes at the door,â he reminds you as you barge into his dorm room after a particularly difficult exam for one of your classes. You do as he asks, grumbling about how he has no mercy for the fallen, tossing them haphazardly beside the door and prancing past him. He takes the time to tidy them up, as if heâs expecting it. âHow was your exam?â
âAwful. I went through war.â
Caleb grins as he sits down at the coffee table beside you, watching as you bury your face into your arms. âAnd whose fault is it that they didnât want to study?â
âYours.â
âFunny,â he snorts, and you feel his large hand ruffling the top of your head. âItâs alright, splints. I can tutor you a bit earlier on the next one.â
âEven you canât save me for this class.â
âIs that a challenge?â
He ends up cooking up something quick in his makeshift kitchen (essentially just a rice cooker), while you laze around on his bed, scrolling aimlessly on your phone. Once heâs finished, you scarf down his food like a man starved, lips stretching widely. At times like these, youâre oddly grateful for his hopeless love toward MC. How else would he have learned to cook such good food? âYou should honestly be a chef, Caleb. Actually, no, that would mean other people would eat your food. I guess you can just be my personal chef when weâre married.â
Caleb remains completely unaffected, wordlessly cleaning the plate in front of you. âI didnât realize I was engaged.â
âWell, now you know. Not sure if you remember, but I had fireworks for you and everything when I proposed. Plus an orchestra.â
He hums, looking up as if heâs in thought, and then nods. âNow that you mention it, that does sound familiar, splints. How could I forget?â
You shrug. âYou tell me.â
His face falls as you pace to the door and begin to put your shoes back on. âWhere are you going? Arenât you done with class?â
âGoing out. I deserve it after that exam.â
âWith your friends?â
âNo, with four guys,â you joke, but he doesnât seem to find it very funny. âIâm just going to a club. I wonât be back too late.â
Heâs already grabbing his jacket. âI can come.â
You push him back with your finger by the nose, and he blinks in surprise, making you laugh. âNo need. You have exams too, yâknow.â
âIâm done studying.â
âLiar.â
Though it takes some convincing, you eventually have him sit at his desk once more. He manages to nag a whole lot as you leave, reminding you to call him once youâre done so he can pick you up, but you just wave him off as you leave out the door. You take your time getting readyâdolling yourself up to hide the dark circles beneath your eyes. As you get ready, you video call MC, where she asks how you and Caleb have been doing in her absence. She rants about her days with her grandma, complaining about how quiet the house is when Caleb isnât home, though she indulged in the beginning. She asks you to show her your outfit once youâre done, and she beams brightly in your screen, squealing about how youâd likely get a boyfriend soon that you can tell her all about.
You just smile, because you donât know how to tell her that the only boy you want is wrapped around her unknowing hand.
The club is loud. Where the music rumbles through your feet to the tips of your fingertips, and the lights are flashing in a dimly lit room. Your friends flock to a table and order drinks while you let yourself feel the music and crack a joke or two once in a while.
A group of guys approaches you with easy smiles and louder voices than necessaryâconfidence sharpened by cheap cologne. One of them leans against your table like heâs done it a hundred times before, asking your name, where youâre from, if you come here often. The usual.
You answer, choking out a laugh to humor his unfunny jokes alongside your friends, while the swigs you take from your drink become deeper and deeper.Â
Heâs not bad at flirting, you think. Subtle, and not too glaring about it. But you donât particularly enjoy humoring it, and it becomes gradually more apparent as your eyes keep drifting elsewhere and you keep having to ask him to repeat himself. Youâre growing bored. Irritated.
Because heâs not Caleb.
It hits you in strange, inconvenient flashes. The way this guy stands just a little too far away. The way his voice doesnât quite reach you over the music, even when heâs close. The way you donât feel that familiar, grounding presence like an anchor holding you to the ground.
You find yourself glancing past his shoulder. Half-wishing to see Caleb there. Watching. Hovering.
But thereâs only strangers. Blurred faces and flashing lights.
âYou okay?â the guy asks, tilting his head.
âYeah,â you say too quickly. âLong week.â
He grins, like thatâs an invitation. Says something elseâsomething about getting you another drink, maybe dancing, maybe getting out of here.
You nod again. Smile again.
Across the room, your friends are already disappearing into the crowd, dragged toward the dance floor by laughter and hands you donât recognize. One of them glances back at you, gives you a look that asks âyouâre good, right?â before sheâs gone.
You sit back down at the table when the guy steps away. Maybe to grab drinks, maybe because he senses your attention drifting. You donât really care which.
The music swells in your chest. The lights flicker. You wish you could enjoy yourself, but itâs particularly hard today.
You take another sip. Then another. Your phone rests face-down on the table, but you flip it over anyway.
No messages.
Of course not. He cares, but not like that. Not in the way that he would spam MCâs phone whenever he didnât know where she was or how she was doing. No, not like that at all.
Another sip. The glass is nearly empty now.
And suddenly, youâre pressing send before you can even register whatâs happening.
[you]: hi
The answer comes immediately, the grey bubbles popping up on his end of the screen.
[futre hubs <333]: do you need me to come pick you up?
[futre hubs <333]: i can
Youâre not sure why you feel like shit, but you hate it. In moments like theseâmoments where the alcohol lets you lower your walls and truly thinkâit hits you like a truck, like a deeply sinking feeling in your chest. The years of rejection after rejection that the two of you frame like a bitâas if your feelings have become so miniscule that it no longer even phases him.Â
It hurts, a bit. More than you let yourself feel.
Youâre not sure how much time passes. Maybe minutes or maybe an hour. Thereâs buzzing throughout your body. The grip on your waist belonging to the man youâve been half-heartedly entertaining suddenly becomes harsher, snapping you out of your trance. It feels unlike Caleb, but you let it sit anyway. However, the hand moves to your wrist, and youâre being pulled out of the crowd towards the wall.
Too touchy. Heâs saying something into your ear, and you feel his breath against your skin. You donât like it. Too close. The buzzing feeling feels more like an alarm now.
The words either go unheard due to the music or donât deter him. You want to go back. Back to Caleb. In the moment, you begin to thinkâalmost as if the world is in slow motion. Perhaps the drinks, you think. You wonder if Caleb will leave you. You wonder if heâll leave to go be with MC. You wonder if the years youâve spent expressing your love to him meant as much to him as it did to you, or if he just found it plain annoying. You wonder if now that youâre in college, heâd want to explore other people, and heâll finally find an outlet to get rid of you for good.Â
But you know he wouldnât. Because he cares for you. Just not as much as he cares for her.
You wonder if heâs ever looked at you with the same softness he does with MC.
Someone pulls you away from the man and into their chest, and the worries dissipate in an instant. His scent. His warmth. You knew heâd come. He always does. It only takes a warning glare from Caleb before the man disappears into the crowd again, and you feel the grip on your wrist loosen. Caleb stares down at you, your back still to his chest as you blink wearily, almost in slow motion, and he sighs. He doesnât give you the same smile he gives to MC when sheâs in trouble.Â
A part of you wishes he wasnât always there for youânot when itâs so different from how heâs there for her.Â
You sit idly in front of a convenience store parking lot while Caleb fetches you some water and ice cream. You have your knees to your chest, arms pulling them close as you shiver against the cold autumn breeze. You shouldâve brought a jacket. The buzzing, hot feeling of the alcohol is subsiding too quickly.
âDrink.â You feel a water bottle press against your cheek from behind, and Caleb plops down beside you with a plastic bag. He notices how youâre holding yourself together and frowns. âAre you cold?â
âNo.â
âI told you to grab a jacket.â
âYou nag too much.â
He snickers and twists open the cap of the water bottle for you to drink, which you sip carefully. He strips his jacket off and drapes it over your shoulders, and you immediately bury yourself in it. It smells like him.
âWhat kind of woman do you like, Caleb?â
âYou and your questions.â
âI want to know.â
He shifts to face you, motioning for you to lift your arms. He grabs either side of his jacket and pulls it shut, fumbling with the zipper until he manages to zip it to your chin. You can barely claw your hands out of his sleevesâthe fabric almost engulfs youâbut he just laughs. âMy type? A woman who brings jackets when itâs cold.â
You scowl, making his laugh echo louder. âOther than that.â
âA woman who goes to class in the morning.â
â...Other than that.â
âA woman who doesnât leave her clothes all over my floor when she feels like sleeping over.â
âSomething else.â
âA woman who eats healthy, balanced meals. A woman who doesnât steal all my pens and then still ends up asking me for more. Maybe someone who doesnât pass out drooling on my pillow. Or someone who doesnât let half the world know that they like someoneâhell, maybe even the entire world.â
Caleb glances at you, chuckling to himself, but stops the moment he sees that youâre not laughing with him. Your head hangs low, your feet shuffling anxiously. His face twists, and suddenly the air thickens. âSplints?â
You pick at your sleeves. âSo just not me?â
âI was just kidding around.â
âJokes have some truth to them.â
âNot all of them. I didnât mean toââ
âItâs okay, Caleb,â you finally meet his eyes again, and shrug. âI know you like someone else. Iâm not an idiot.â
Silence commences, like a bell dropping on your head.
Caleb shifts his weight, one hand coming up to rub the back of his neck. Itâs a nervous habit youâve seen a hundred timesâusually followed by some half-joke, something to smooth things over.
But nothing comes.
The space between you suddenly feels too small and too big all at once. You try to act normal. You really do.
You fiddle with your sleeve again, smoothing it down, then pulling at it, then smoothing it again. Anything to give your hands something to do, so they donât reach for him out of instinct.Â
Caleb glances at you. Then away.
Then back again, like heâs trying to solve something written across your face but canât quite make out the words.
âHey,â he starts, softer this time.
You hum in response, not trusting your voice yet.
Another pause. God, itâs awkward.
âI didnât mean it like that,â he mutters again, quieter now. Not defensive. Unsure. âYou know I think youâre amazing.â
Just not enough.
âI am pretty great,â but it comes out too soft.
Neither of you knows what to do with another stretch of silence. So you opt to drink some more water instead.
âWhy do you like me so much?â He eventually mutters out as he bites his bottom lip, eyes falling to the ground like he canât bear to watch your expression. âYou could do a lot better.â
You smile, but itâs half-hearted. âHow could I not?â
He pauses, as if choosing his words carefully before his voice comes out in a soft whisper. âYou mean so much to me. Youâre smart, beautiful, and everything good in betweenâwhoever gets to call you theirs is the luckiest person I know. And you know Iâd do anything for you.â
Despite their sweetness, his words feel like judgement wrapping around your heart in vines, squeezing just before itâs about to pop. You wish you could block your ears out for what comes next.
âBut it canât be me.â Calebâs lips purse, brows furrowing as he looks away. âI canât give you what you want.â
The rejection hurts more than you realized it would. You want to tell him that itâs not fair to treat you the way he does and expect you not to fall for him. That holding your hair when you vomit, falling asleep at your bedside when youâre sick, and his eyes closing in on you in any room that youâre in is not fair.Â
Instead, you nod. And you swear to yourself that youâll swallow this sickening lump in your throat that makes you want to hurl and sob at the same time. That youâll bury it deep in a graveyard within you that even the closest person to you would never know of. Especially him. Â
âI donât want it, either,â you snort back, immediately perking up to slap his back in what results in a jolt. His shoulders tense as he blinks wide at you, unsure of the sudden shift in atmosphere. âI donât want feelings that belong to someone else, dumbass.â
Once it sinks in that you mean it, a smile finds its way onto his face, though something flickers beneath it, like a flash of something you donât want to look too far into.
Not because you still had hope, but because whatever existed between you had never been something as simple as a crush. It had rootsâtangled deep into your souls and impossible to pull free without tearing something open. You wanted to keep what was left. Even if it lingered just a little longer, and even if you pretended not to see the splintering strands in the string tying you together.
So you let it settle. Let it rot somewhere you couldnât feel it.
The two of you fall into the kind of closeness that youâve always had, and time passes as if it was always meant to be this way. Itâs easier this way. For a while, it does work, but nothing ever really stays under wraps. Despite your incessant protests in telling yourself itâs fading, the scars heâs inflicted on you are just that. Scars. Unmoving yet subtle.
The thinning thread finally snaps a few years later, when MC develops feelings for a coworker in the Hunterâs Association. The day the cracks in the glass bridge holding you together shatter beneath your feet into a million different pieces.
âWhenâs the last time youâve slept?â
Heâs sprawled shirtless on the couch of his apartment in Skyhaven, freshly out of the shower after you arrived to visit him for the first time in monthsâonly to see that heâs nearly overworking himself to death. Despite him going off to the DAA after college, youâd kept close contact, the connection between the two of you never wavering regardless of your restricted time. It only changed after news of MC broke out. Worried, youâd rushed to Skyhaven to make sure he was doing okay, which youâre clearly glad you did now. Youâd practically had to drag him to the shower to keep him from passing out next to the front door in his gear.
Caleb, clearly, is off. You suppose you donât blame him. The woman he loves is yearning for another. Almost poetic, really, but you donât like seeing him this way. Especially when you know what it feels like yourself, even if youâve gotten used to it. Gotten over it. He looks like a kicked puppy. Hurt, like a dog whoâs just been scratched by its owner.Â
âI dunno.â
You peer into the empty abyss that is his fridge and frown. Thereâs a few measly apples sitting inside, and a half-eaten protein bar thatâs been there for god knows how long. âWhat the hell have you been eating?â
He responds with a grunt, letting his head fall back against the sofa. You decide to make do with the instant noodles he has stashed in one of the cupboards and bring it over to him once it seems mostly done. With a fork, you stick out a few noodles to his face, urging him. âEat.â
âNot hungry,â he mutters.
âDonât care. Sit up.â
He opens one of his eyes to peek at you, which somehow urges him forward. Thereâs darkness beneath his eyesâeven stubble littering his chin from a few days worth of not shaving. You want to reach out and poke fun at him, but the state heâs in deters you. Instead, you silently feed him, watching him chew his food while staring at your hands. It makes you wish you put on a fresh set of polish before you came.
You twirl another small forkful and hold it out. He leans forward this time without being told, taking it quietly. His shoulder brushes yours as he settles back against the couch, and you can feel his skin through your shirt.
âThanks,â he mutters, voice rough from disuse more than anything. âFor coming.â
âYeah,â you say, quieter now. âSomeone had to make sure you didnât rot in here.â
He huffs a faint laugh, though it doesnât quite reach his eyes. âProbably wouldâve. Dramatic way to go out, huh?â
You nudge his knee with yours. âStarving to death in your own apartment? Real heroic.â
A ghost of a smile flickers across his face. It makes your heart flutter. Stupid feelings.
ââŚthanks for coming, splints,â he says.
Your chest tightensâsharp and sudden. It feels like itâs threatening to feel something thatâs not yours to feel. So instead, you look down at the bowl, pretending to focus on separating another bite. You twirl your fork, more carefully this time. âI had to. You werenât responding, so I thought you died, or something. Open.â
He rolls his eyes, but obeys anyway. âBossy.â
âLearned from the best.â
His lids flutter shut, voice dropping to a lower hum. âI missed this.â
Your hand stills. âWhat?â
He shrugs, eyes still closed. âYou being here.â
His hair is sticking to his forehead, still damp from the shower. Before you realize what youâre doing, you brush a stray strand of hair off his forehead. You speak quietly. âYou look like shit.â
âWow,â he mutters. âYou have a way with words.â
You frown, and without thinking, your hand lingers at his temple for just a second longer than it should. His skin is warm, still hot from the shower.
âIdiot,â you whisper.
He catches your wrist. Not tight, not stopping you. Simply holding it there for a moment that feels too long and not long enough at once. Your eyes meet for a fleeting moment, and then youâre looking away, setting the mostly finished bowl of noodles onto the coffee table to pull away.
âDonât make this a habit. Iâm not flying out here every time you forget to eat.â
âCould,â he murmurs. âYou would.â
You donât respond to that, because heâs not wrong.
ââŚIs she okay?â
It slips out of him like instinct. Like breathing. And just like that, everything shifts. You donât answer right awayâinstead, your fingers tighten slightly around the fork.
âSheâs fine,â you say eventually. Leave it, you plead in your head.
âDid she say anything?â he asks, sitting up a little more now. Thereâs something in his eyes, like heâs searching. âWhen you talked to her.â
You shrug, trying to keep your tone even. âJust normal stuff.â Stop, you think. Please stop talking.
âLike what?â
âLike her job. Her grandma. Nothing serious.â Shit.
He frowns slightly. âShe didnât mention him?â
There it is. Itâs always about her.
You know heâs in a vulnerable spot right now, but it does nothing to ease the sudden flame roaring in your chest. Whether itâs from years of repressed hurt or shame, all it amounts to is a relentless ball of rage inside of you that leaves your nails digging crescents into the palms of your hands. You stare at him, chewing on the inside of your cheek as you inch away from him.Â
âDoes it matter?â
Calebâs face relaxes. âWhat?â
âWhy does it matter what she thinks about him? She likes him, end of story, no?â
âI just want to know if heâs a decent guy.â
Your ass. âThatâs not really your business, Caleb, but sure. Heâs a great guy. Amazing, honestly. Heâs really gentlemanly and checks every single box. He lives above her apartment, so theyâre right next to each other. He treats her gently, too. Iâd bet every girl would jump at a chance to date a guy like that.â
Youâre not sure where the words are tumbling out of, but itâs too late to go back. Neither do you want to.
âI wonder if he has a brother. Maybe MC could set me up or something.â
âOh. Is heâŚâ Calebâs back straightens, and you notice his fingers digging into his thighs. â...handsome?â
âDidnât you hear me? Iâm telling you, heâs perfect. His face could pay for the Linkon rent by itself.â
He suddenly stands, and you glare up at him through your eyebrows. âWhy are you talking like that?â
âI donât know what youâre talking about,â you scoff.
He narrows his eyes. Itâs something you havenât seen in a while, since Caleb rarely gets upset at you. âYou know exactly what Iâm talking about, splints.â
âCan you just spit it out? What am I saying differently?â
âYouâre angry.â
You stand, following suit. He looms over you to have his shadow essentially engulf you, and you wish you could kick his ankle so he falls to the ground. âMaybe if you werenât so irritating, I wouldnât feel so annoyed right now.â
âWhat?â
âItâs hard to watch, Caleb,â you hiss out in exasperation, throwing your hands into the air. âItâs always pipsqueak this, pipsqueak that, pipsqueak what. Seriously, weâre not kids anymore, you need to get over it!â
Youâre not sure if youâre talking to him or yourself anymore.
âCan we calm down and talk? If Iâve been talking too much about it, I can stop, soââ
âWe havenât seen each other in months, Caleb! And all you want to ask me about is how sheâs been? Why donât you ask her yourself, if youâre so curious? Oh, but you canât, because you always have to be perfect in front of her. So instead, you dump all of this on me. Your goods and bads, all of it, just for me to get kicked to the curb like Iâm some dispensable object.â
âWhat?â his balks. âDispensible? Are you serious? As if I havenât gotten you out of every little thing youâve gotten yourself into the past decade of our lives? As if I havenât picked you up every weekend from your friendsâ places at three in the morning? Like I havenât called you every single weekââ
âWell, I want you to stop that!â your words spit at him like weak knives, growing louder by the second.Â
âYou didnât seem very against it the last forty times.â
âI am now.â
âWhat has gotten into you, splints?â
âDonât call me that right now,â you glower, and you try to ignore the hurt flashing across his expression. âIâm just sick of seeing you follow her around like some wet dog. She doesnât see you like that, canât you see that?â
Your breathing begins to stutter, and you suck in a deep breath through your nose. Your chest stings, and you pray that you donât lose composure so the tears threatening to bubble at the corners of your eyes remain hidden.
âYou told me that you couldnât give me what I wanted. Well, she canât either,â you bore holes into his chest, too afraid of what you might see if you look up. âIf I can get over my stupid feelings, so can you.â
But youâre not over it. Not at all.
He opens his mouth to respond, but nothing comes out. For the first time in a while, youâve rendered him speechless, and it feels even worse than what it felt to be rejected years ago. Youâre not sure how your nails havenât drawn blood at this point. Youâd rather that they do, so you have some excuse to use the restroom.
âItâs not fair what you do, Caleb,â you try to will your tears to stay at bay, but you canât help them. They sting, blurring your vision as you drop your head in some pathetic hope that he wonât face them head on. âHow you treat me when you donât like me like that is not fair. At least MC doesnât know, but youâyou know, and yet youââ
The rational part of you says that itâs not entirely his fault. Sure, you insisted on staying by his side. Sure, you insisted that you could push down your feelings. Sure, youâve promised a lot of things, but itâs his fault too, for being the way he isâso kind, so thoughtful, just so him.Â
You wipe desperately at your tears. It was a lost cause from the start.
âPlease donât cry.â His face drains of color, apparent even against the dim lighting in his apartment. He steps towards you, and you take a step back. âPlease donât cry, splints, just not that.â
But when your tears refuse to cease dripping down your cheeks, your face flushing in humiliation, you feel both his hands cupping either side of it. He tilts your gaze up, and you realize that heâs only inches away from you, so much so that you can feel his breath against your skin. Itâs moments like these that you lose yourself in his beauty. The deepness of his eyes that seem to peer into your very soul is one of the first features that you fell in love with as a child, and it hasnât changed since. Damn him. You blink, eyes wide while his own flicker to your lips.Â
âBe as mad as you want. Hit me, hate me even,â he whispers, his nose almost touching yours now. His thumb pad smooths your tears away. âBut donât waste your tears on someone like me.â
You think you might be imagining things. Because with the tension that nearly suffocates you and his lashes almost fluttering against your skin, you think he might be about to kiss you.
A sharp pain jabs you in the chest. Is it pity? A consolation prize dressed up as something softer? Is it to smooth things over, to make this moment easier for him to leave behind? Or is it rebellion? Something reckless from the fact that he canât have her? Your tears have dried up, but the rest of your body seems to weep, as no excitement, no butterflies course through your veins.Â
Why is it always something else? Why is it never you? It only hurtsâbecause even now, youâre just the place he empties everything he feels for her.
Instinctively, you press your palm into his lips to push him away, and it feels like the air itself has stilled.
His breath lingers against your skin. Yours stutters like itâs forgotten how to exist in the same space as him. The air is so thick you could slice it with a knife.
Eventually, he pulls away. Caleb stares at you with an expression you havenât seen before, though you donât look long enough to analyze it. Wordlessly, you gather your things, stuffing your jacket into your bag and stumble over to the doorâall while he stays locked in a petrified state, like heâs processing what he just did. Your gaze remains fixated on the wooden panels of the floor while you pack, refusing to look any higher in case you might see anything other than his feet.
âDonât follow me,â you tell him as you leave.Â
You donât wait to see if he hears you.
The journey home feels like thereâs a gaping hole in your chest, and all you can do is stare out the window as you feel the vibrations of the train through your fingertips. Outside, the world blurs past in streaks of dim lights and shadowed shapes, and you wish that your feelings were as fleeting as the buildings blurring by.Â
You try to count the number of trees you see. Not on the warmth of his breath against your palm. Not on how close heâd been. Not on the fact that, for a second, you almost let him.
If you hadnât pushed him away, would it have meant anything? Or would you have just been a mistake heâd regret in the morning?
Your phone buzzes frantically in your pocket, and you pull it out to see his name in big bold letters. Heâs texting you simultaneously, apologizing in so many different ways that they all start to blend into one message you donât plan on reading. You refuse to give into what your heart wants. Itâs hurt you too much in the past. So instead, your thumb hovers above the âmuteâ button.
You press it and shut your eyes.
Even if itâs difficult to adjust the first few weeks without him, you canât bear to face him either. He shows up at your door. Nearly every day for some time, knocking softly and asking if youâd be willing to talk. When you simply plug in your earbuds and bury yourself into your bed, he apologizes through the door and leaves you something to eat. You tend to throw it out at first, but after a while, you figure itâs just a waste. Just like that, a month goes by. And then another. Then another. Until you canât count them on one hand anymore. He comes by once every two weeks or so now, likely busy with his work.
Despite how much your body seems to miss his presence, you wonder if you should distance Caleb permanently. Itâs a daunting idea. One that you never wouldâve thought just a few years ago, but the embarrassment runs deeper than you want to admit. The feelings youâve tried so hard to hide clearly arenât hidden. Is this sustainable?Â
Regardless of what you think, he comes around like clockwork.
âAre you in there?â He knocks gently on your door, voice soft. He probably knows you are.
âNo.â
He chuckles from the other end. âRight. Happy birthday, splints.â
You glance at your phone calendar. Heâs right.Â
As usual, he begins to talk about random events in his life that he hasnât had the opportunity to tell you, and while you usually muffle it out, you decide to quietly shuffle over to the door today. To tell him, maybe, that you donât want to keep doing this. Or maybe just to hear his voice, you donât know. Either way, you slide your back down the door where heâs on the other side, pulling your knees into your chest.
âI donât know if youâve read my text, butââ
âI donât read them.â
Caleb stops, and you can almost hear his breath hitch. You usually donât give him more than a few words, much less a full sentence, so it seems to have taken him aback. After the brief remission, you hear him clear your throat. âSplints, can you open the door? I want to talkâapologize to you.â
Silence.
âOr I can do it out here. Thatâs fine,â he sighs. âI want you to know that itâs okay if you want to hate me forever after this. I wonât keep clinging to you if you at listen to what I have to say, but I really justâI need to say that this is my fault.â
You half-heartedly hear his words drone on, his confidence wavering every so often while you pull up his chats on your phone. You have no idea how you hadnât folded and read his chats until now, though it mightâve been more so for your own peace than anything. Thereâs too many to scroll up to, so you read the most recent messages, squinting in the dark against the light of your phone.Â
[1:41PM]
[caleb]: are you eating well?
[caleb]: i made this today
[caleb]: [image attached]
[caleb]: your favorite dishes :) iâll drop them off at your place later
[caleb]: i hope youâre not just throwing them outâŚwouldnât blame you tho
[caleb]: at least take care of yourself :)
[8:13AM]
[caleb]: hi splints :)
[caleb]: you probably watched it already but that movie you wanted to see came out a week ago. I went to go see it
[caleb]: i still think itâs kind of badâŚbut it was entertaining
[caleb]: unless you wanna argue about it ?? :3
[5:32PM]
[caleb]: ranked first today
[caleb]: i was excited to celebrate it with you and then remembered :/
[caleb]: it doesnât feel as good when i canât tell you lol
[caleb]: hope youâre okay
[11:23PM]
[caleb]: i wish i hadnât been so stupid
[caleb]: i didnât deserve you back then
[caleb]: i still donât
[caleb]: i shouldnât have lost my cool when you were over here. didnât like hearing you talk about that guy like that
[caleb]: im sure heâs a good looking guy, and i know youâre particularly weak to good looking guysâŚ
[caleb]: i was being childish and i wish i couldâve explained it to you then
[caleb]: i know you donât owe me anything and you donât have to listen to what i have to say
[caleb]: but i never wanted to make you feel used, and i never did. if that even sounds believable lol
[caleb]: it was never about her
[caleb]: thereâs so much more i want to say but iâll say it in person
[caleb]: miss you a lot
[caleb]: sleep tight
You wish the tightness in your chest would go away. You wish you didnât feel his sorrow through him. And you wish you didnât care about your own feelings for him.
âI love you, splints,â he murmurs, and your attention tears away from the chats, your phone nearly clattering onto the floor. Your eyes widen, suddenly regretting that you missed the first half of his speech.Â
âNot in the way you say it to your friends, or the way you say it to family. Youâre my life, and youâve been my life since the day you gave me that ring. I care for MC, but what I feel for you is different. Itâs always been different. I realized that years ago, but I was afraid that it wouldnât be fair for you. I thought you deserved someone better than someone who doesnât know how to understand their own feelings.â Your throat dries. âI thought it wasnât fair because Iâd already put you through so much.â
âAt the same time, Iâm a selfish guy, you know? I couldnât let you go either, because I couldnât bear to see you with someone else. I wanted it to be us, and the only way I could think of existing without feeling like I was ruining you was to stay how we were. Stagnant, I guess,â he chuckles, but it feels sad. Weak. âIâm an idiot when it comes to you, you know.â
You donât respond.
Not because you donât have anything to sayâif anything, thereâs too much. It crowds your throat, every word scraping against the next until none of them can make it out. Your fingers hover uselessly over your phone, screen still lit with a conversation you canât even remember reading.
âI love you.â
The words echo, but they donât land the way you once dreamed they would. They donât bloom or soften or fix anything. They just sit. Too heavy. Too late.
Your chest tightens, aching outward like itâs trying to break free. Because youâve wanted thisâGod, youâve wanted thisâfor so long that you stopped letting yourself imagine it could ever actually happen. It should feel like relief. Instead, it feels real, but fragile.
Because you remember too much. The almosts. The waiting. The way you learned how to swallow your emotions when he built a wall between the two of youâand that doesnât disappear just because he finally found the words.
Your hand curls slightly against the door, fingers brushing the cool surface.
Even with all that, you still miss the warmth of his skin. How his hair felt through a towel as you dried it. How heâd flick your forehead when youâd get a question wrong during one of his tutoring sessions. How heâd tease you about your grades or interests, and learn more about them anyway. How heâd message you throughout the day about random endeavors. How heâd always be there. How with just a call of his name, he wouldâve crossed the continents for you. His eyes. His lips. His face. His painfully handsome face.
You remember him in all parts of your lifeâand not a single moment youâve spared has gone without him. You remember how he held your hand when youâd broken your arm, and the way heâd lifted you into the air and embraced you when you were accepted into the same college as him. You remember how heâd pet your hair as you complained about him going too far for the DAA, promising heâd visit often. And he did. He always kept his promises.
Your body moves on its own, as if this was how it was always meant to be. The door slowly creaks open.
ââŚWeâre a mess.â
A faint, tired smile is all you can give him. Still, when he sees you, the world seems to stop for just the two of you, and it takes him a moment to fully register that youâre really there. That youâre not just a figment of his imagination, and he hasnât truly lost you forever as heâd feared. âThis doesnât mean youâre completely out of the woods. Iâm still mad.â
âYou should be,â he whispers out, nearly breathless.
Hesitantly, you step towards him. He reaches his arm out, brows furrowed cautiously like heâs not sure if heâs allowed to even blink right now. The tips of his fingers twitch towards you. You raise a brow, and he swallows the lump in his throat, retracting back until you nod.Â
Realizing you donât have shoes, you step onto the fronts of his shoes one foot at a time, taking his hand until youâre flush against him and heâs already engulfing you into a crushing embrace. His arms wrap around you, strong and warm. He smells good. Though you canât confidently say the same for yourself given the state youâre in, he drops his chin into the crook of your neck and inhales deeply, like a man starved.
âNote to self,â you mumble. âDonât propose to any handsome guy you see.â
Caleb laughs, airy this time, and you feel it against your collarbone. âI thought you were going to leave your husband out here to die in the cold.â
âI should divorce you. Weâre not even married yet.â
He grins, lopsided. âYou should.â
âI wonât.â
âI know.
You bury your face into his chest, fingers digging into the fabric on his back. âI donât want a version of my life without you, Caleb. As annoying as you are.â
He pulls away for a brief moment and places a kiss on your cheek, his own dusting red. Flowers feel like theyâre blooming on the spot he pecked, but somehow, it feels natural. Youâve always been close to him physically throughout your upbringing, even if it never involved lipsâthat was new territory. You cross your arms, relying on his hands around your waist to keep you upright. âTell me more.â
âYou nag too much.â
He kisses your nose. âHm?â
âYouâre emotionally repressed.â
âOuch.â He kisses your temple.
âYouâre too good at things you donât try at.â
Your jawline.
âYouâre unstable. Youâre too protective. Youâre stupid.â
âI love you,â he says, pressing his forehead against yours. His lips hover above your own, just centimeters away.
Your lashes flutter against his. âThen prove it to me.â
âI will,â he whispers, just as his mouth slots against yours, and a warmth blooms throughout your chest. You melt into him, like you always have and you always will. âIâll prove it to you for the rest of my life.â
caleb x reader texts after you get your very own apartment for the first time and move out of gran's house. problem is, caleb spoiled you a bit too much by doing everything for you, and now you go to him for everything. inspired by this tiktok
âź set pre-explosion (and relationship!), just around the time you're taking hunter exams, which would make you roughly around 21-22
note: i tried to replicate the game's ui best as i could, but of course it's not perfect đ that apple pin placement drove me CRAZY. but alas, my spite persevered against months of procrastination on this workskin project with my anger at fake text generators on play store being so ass. i hope you enjoy!! (pls don't talk about the voice note discrepanciees i wasnt paying attention and am too lazy to go back to the htmls and change ;;;;;)
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