Natalia Rybka (Polish, 1988) - Untitled (2015)
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Natalia Rybka (Polish, 1988) - Untitled (2015)

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the carp have yellow eyes that shine between murky depth sweat fell down his chest in the roman sun red feathers dust above the crowd gathered round "Have you ever seen the way..." drip. "The rising sun smothers a mother's love?" drip. drip. "Can you feel her eyes?" drip. drip. drip. gazes swivel in skulls trying to disguise the wind blowing down the backs of their neck green gears grind groaning growth grandiose geese get greedy go growl "There is a fear you refuse to make language for, as though your linguistics could smother. such a human folly." a dampness creeps further clumping what longs to be free "Do you think you could recognize the way your life predicts your death? Do you like to toil such a torture?" was this done special for me lemon lemon ice cold salt sit spit slit split.
sea, swallow me
hello,
I'm pleased to make your acquaintance. We are two people who have unknowingly shared a vulnerable thing, our home.
When I was 5 years old my family bought your house. Which once housed the whole lives of the family before mine. I met the old couple one time. All I can remember from it was staring at the blue and white tiles behind the kitchen sink. Before it was your sink, or my sink, it was her sink. Their dog is buried in the backyard, past the rose bushes that my dogs ate down to stubs in the flowerbed.
I'm curious if you've ever wondered about me, the same way I still think of them. I must confess, when I lived in your home, I never thought about you. At the time, that house was my whole world. But, I think of you now. I hope you love the walls and the floors and the trees and the swings as much as we all did before you.
May the legacy of your family fill your home.
Do take care.
"What do you think it would feel like to be someone else?"
Atonement (2007), Joe Wright

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Atonement (2007), Joe Wright
nowadays when I smile
I smile.
when my cheeks puff up and my lips drag across my front teeth it is only a smile.
its like I can finally start predicting relief when I glance myself in the mirror
I am crinkly eyes and asymmetrical dimples
nothing more but most importantly, nothing less
its just
a smile
I
there's someone who lives here with me
Lest, I get too lonely.
somehow she holds all the best bits of me at arms length
becoming the idol and the shallow shadow.
I found myself in her, the way I could glance the way her face stretched with sleep in the morning. or the way late at night I could look out at the glittering map and watch the way her hips moved as I spun around the room. she became beautiful slowly then all at once I couldn't look away. Her beauty became currency bartering my lonely heart. I'd tell her all my best quips wanting to light up her eyes. When I'd cry she'd run her eyes over my fair skin and hold my red camera to the mirror. it was the best she knew how to reach me, you see, she was stuck. Princess in the tower, rose in a glass case, never land always at sea.
on the desire to be understood and the conflicting pain and joy that come from it
daniel saint // frank bramleyâs âa hopeless dawnâ // richard sikenâs âthe torn-up roadâ // george orwellâs â1984â // nbcâs hannibal // greta gerwigâs âlittle womenâ // elliot knight // roman opaĹkaâs âadam and eveâ // tim kreiderâs âi know what you think of meâ
sometimes the good poet writes boring poetry
and you discover the artist that writes music right onto your skin, years after everyone else does
and the girl you thought was too cool for you, is sad to miss spending time together
and you turn around to find you're the object of someone else's fascination.
and I just realized it. i'm just like everybody else. a mess of a human, being.

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Graduation Poems - The Academy of American Poets is the largest membership-based nonprofit organization fostering an appreciation for contem
Relax
Bad things are going to happen.
Your tomatoes will grow a fungus
and your cat will get run over.
Someone will leave the bag with the ice cream
melting in the car and throw
your blue cashmere sweater in the drier.
Your husband will sleep
with a girl your daughterâs age, her breasts spilling
out of her blouse. Or your wife
will remember sheâs a lesbian
and leave you for the woman next door. The other catâ
the one you never really likedâwill contract a disease
that requires you to pry open its feverish mouth
every four hours. Your parents will die.
No matter how many vitamins you take,
how much Pilates, youâll lose your keys,
your hair and your memory. If your daughter
doesnât plug her heart
into every live socket she passes,
youâll come home to find your son has emptied
the refrigerator, dragged it to the curb,
and called the used appliance store for a pick upâdrug money.
Thereâs a Buddhist story of a woman chased by a tiger.
When she comes to a cliff, she sees a sturdy vine
and climbs half way down. But thereâs also a tiger below.
And two miceâone white, one blackâscurry out
and begin to gnaw at the vine. At this point
she notices a wild strawberry growing from a crevice.
She looks up, down, at the mice.
Then she eats the strawberry.
So hereâs the view, the breeze, the pulse
in your throat. Your wallet will be stolen, youâll get fat,
slip on the bathroom tiles of a foreign hotel
and crack your hip. Youâll be lonely.
Oh taste how sweet and tart
the red juice is, how the tiny seeds
crunch between your teeth.
âEverything is beautiful and I am so sad. This is how the heart makes a duet of wonder and grief.â
â Mark Nepo
fictional kiss things that end me
being unable to open their eyes for a few moments afterward
one small kiss, pulling away for an instant, then devouring each other
pressing their foreheads together while kissing
speaking normally, then after the kiss their voice is hoarse
guys furrowing their brow when kissing passionately
staring at the otherâs lips, trying not to kiss them, before giving in
running their thumb over the otherâs lips
when they lean forward a fraction as if to kiss the other person, then realize they shouldnât and pull back to stop themselves
ripping the other away -Â âno we shouldnâtâ - but when they kiss them again they moan and hold them close
one sliding their hand into the otherâs hair slowly
their entire body freezing for a second when their love kisses them
accidentally being forced inches apart from each other, staring at each otherâs lips, and just before they kiss someone pulls them back apart
when one stops the kiss to whisper âIâm sorry, are you sure you-â and they answer by kissing them more
a hoarse whisper âkiss meâ
then licks their lips and says âpleaseâ
I've made a raven cycle playlist on spotify. it's very bluesey king of yearning vibes. if any crazy people on the internet have song suggestions or also want to listen to music that makes you miss the fictional friends you read about in books, you have found the right post.
help me please I need friends who are also as emotionally invested in this as I am.
god calls me on the payphone, tells me there aren't enough magnolia trees in the garden. asks me a question. i spend my whole life answering it.

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there is magic in your fingertips
there is fire in your veins. there's a great rumbling that's coming from somewhere and I have yet to be able to tell if its coming from in here or out there.
have you felt it
can you feel it building in here
can we share it, I have to worry
if it isolates me more..
mymy myoh my
someday I will feel free I will be so big and strong that not even the clouds could see the top of me.
I wish to live above the clouds
have I become cynical and sad. gone from the whimsical and free/ I think I needs to get out of here and make a new place for me. but I haven't a clue where. that's not true I know where I desire to be. I feel it in my bones somewhere swimming with my marrow. I long to be there and I need to know how. I need you tell me right now because this is ridiculous. I get to live my life and follow my desire. somewhere out there is the place I belong and I will find it and fulfill that part of me. it is not the whole journey but its a step in the direction im heading. let the pieces fall in place like dominos. the trip is waiting for me. I can feel it. now show yourself. be in the power of this present moment. let me see you- take you in. bask in your glory and feel you under my skin. I will be free until the last breath I take. and then from there on I will be in the open air of the stary night sky. dark deep blues and rich creamy night air. floating weightless for oblivion and grounded in the core. somewhere too nowhere to be anywhere less than everywhere.
"hello,
a part of me is hurt and is looking to heal"
"have I reached the right address?"
"I was hoping I could tell you how it hurts; where the pain twists and bends. I brought a list of some of the places it's come up that I hadn't realized it was buried."
"do you think you could help me?"