Erik when twitter dies

playing resident evil is very stressful because there are monsters and hot people everywhere

(sees that a girl is upset) do you need me to make the world awash with blood over this minor inconvenience, queen?

I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"

lowkey I kinda hate money. If you hate money too, send it to me. I can dispose of it properly

love lying in job applications. Like. What the hell, sure. I am suited to fastpaced high pressure environments. No i will not kill anyone if i get even a little stressed out