today my line cook coworker suggested i do coke. then i asked what kind of egg he would be and he said ostrich

some mormons just invited me to church and when i said no they responded with “rats”

it recently dawned on me that i’ve become obsessed with just being a person in the way that i used to get obsessed with fictional characters. i watch videos about cooking and cleaning. i go online to find events and update my budget. im about to read the newspaper and then hang my clothes up to dry i can’t fucking wait

it just wouldn’t make fiscal sense for me to be full time non binary. today i was personally tipped $20 for being a girl

can’t talk to old people without hearing some cryptic shit that sticks with you forever

why do i own 8 mugs that are all too small for my needs. meanwhile my shoes have no soles left

overheard one of my coworkers asking the other if they’d fed me today. like a dog

just dawned on me that i have the whole rest of my life to make new recipes and try new foods… holy shit what a gift

become the guitarist you hate to see in the world

sometimes when i’m walking i think of myself as a car and my headphones as my speakers

slip resistant summer