a silly little guy

its awesome theres a vampire on sesame street because you need to introduce children to the concept as early as possible

Werewolves can only be killed by silver. Let the trolley run over the werewolf, it will survive.

I eat the werewolf’s ass. This solves none of the problems but I die doing what i loved.

Yeah. I’m the guy who impregnates the mannequins they put in the maternity section. It ain’t much but it pays the bills. Please no further questions at this time.

the worst thing in the world is doing things. the second worst thing in the world is not doing things. how has no one ever come up with a solution for this

modern art exhibit titled "I bet you won't kill yourself" that is just a loaded gun on a podium in a museum

Tee, (and i cannot stress this enough) hee

money beyond ypur wildist dreams

one hundred and seventy dollars

shawty more like a malady in my head if im going to be honest

the bus has me traveling to other locations in my city

I think they should make an animal that can phase through solid matter. And make it hostile

my uncle (named big michael, you will soon find out why) who is 6’9 (Now You Understand) just arrived to sleep over at our place, i was not informed, there are no lights on in the hall, he has a key, and it is 34 minutes past midnight. So that is all to say, I do think with some certainty, that I am now, officially, the first human being who has come this close to seeing the boogie man in real life, and survived. He unfolded himself through that door frame like a poorly made origami crane from hell.

ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to disappear at sea

Something you should always remember about every single person you see on this site is that they are a tumblr user. They are the kind of person who uses tumblr

i thionk we should dump hundreds of gallons of acid on lady liberty to turn her copper again. i think itd be cool. and i think the hudson bay could handle all the acid because its got that new yawk spirit.