Beetlejuice,beetlejuice, BEETLEJUICE!

if you are a game designer and you force me to kill wolves AND you have them make sad puppy noises I'm killing you

see this never happens in spider solitaire for windows

this fucken pic is seriously ruining my life i can not leave work anymore without telling my coworkers ‘im SUCH a girl who leaves in an hour’

they got fired for this BTW

i dont know exactly how to articulate this in a way other people havent but everything is too fast now. 24/7 news cycle, online focuses that last for hours instead of months or years, songs written just so ten seconds can go viral. movies and books churned out to meet some nebulous income quota. idk. im motion sick

theres a knight in my backyard stabbing the ground with his sword trying to render my soil barren by killing the worms but luckily ive trained them all in classical ballet and they keep pirouetting away from the blade

you can’t get sentences like this anywhere else

Claudius to Hamlet, act i scene ii, Hamlet, by Shakespeare, 1609 AD

Geometry was so fuckibg stupid omfg “prove this is a triangle” I literally know it’s a triangle like intuitively bitch

it’s oingo or be boingo’d on this bitch of an earth