you’re just jealous my blood is all over the floor and yours is stuck inside your body

MILD hurt/comfort? nuh uh. torture him. sepsis. swept downstream in a frozen river. 6 month convalescence. commit to it.

writing tip they don’t tell you is that in addition to reading good books you should occasionally read one really bad one so that it inspires you to write something better out of pure rage

did u know u could just draw bad and nothing happens did u know that

what people dont get about divorces is the Whole Thing About Dogs

i have written custody plans for labrador retrievers more complex than i have for children. i went to four years of undergrad, three years of law school, and sat for the bar exam to write up custody exchange provisions for dogs with hyphonated last names

my clients are paying $295 an hour for me to go to court and litigate who makes veterinary decisions for Chuckles the Goldfish and theres literally nothing i can do to stop them

my main issue with making aus is that i will also make sub aus. like the au but theres some different significant change or addition to it. and ill keep making these in my brain until theres like an entire ecosystem of them

for real hard blocked a 31 year old woman for calling herself “old af” i’m not doing this with you. get a grip.

they should invent a taking care of your own body thats easy