Liminal Princess

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Neuroqueer

Of asexual persuasion

I wasn't kissed as a teenager and now I'm a liminal space freak

I will always prefer carpeted hallways over vinyl floored hallways. Having a reflective surface as the ground ruins the appeal of liminal spaces for me. There is an element of chase to vinyl floor hallways. Any hallway is a passage, but where an unreflective carpet provides an idle stroll and an almost hazy sense of maybe-I-should-be-going-somewhere, there is practically a current of the sense that this is a passage in vinyl floored hallways.

I'll get more to this in a moment, but I was alone in school a lot. I was pulled out of class to be taken to private rooms, as many noticeably neurodivergent young children are. I was often alone with a supervisor in hallways or Quiet Rooms, and when I was very very small, these hallways seemed very very big.

I was also in hospital a lot. But this was a bigger, shinier place with more people and a much heavier sense of schedule. Easily publicly accessible, as much view to the outdoors as budget would allow, and the ever present feeling that I will be in and out at very specific times. And? Vinyl floors.

I can hear echoing footsteps and squeaking shoe soles just looking at it. The reflection of the lights and the echo completely oppose the sort of muffled sensory experience I want from these spaces. The width of the hallway, the lighting, even the door frequency are all fine. The floor brings too much awareness to it, I feel watched, and waited on. Chased.

The appeal for me is feeling completely and utterly lost in the depths of the building. My university building has some forgotten about hallways that are used as storage, and if you can squeeze past the dying Xerox, there is a door to a hidden Quiet Room. That's what I'm looking for, and the echoing, bright, reflective Vinyl Floored Hallway makes me feel like I'm at the edge of what I want to be in the middle of.

Now this. Do you understand what I mean when I say I could sit down here? I could sit down here and lean against the wall and it wouldn't feel hostile if someone walked past me.

This feels deeper, literally. Carpeted hallways just look like they're deeper in the guts (sorry) of the building. The quiet room behind the Xerox printer.

Yes I really like the set of Severance

These? Excellence. Falling asleep on anti histamines realness. Muffled footsteps, no windows, no acknowledgement (reflections, echoes, visible scuffs on the walls and floor). Unreality cunt.

Liminal horror is better when things are hidden from you, both in a literal sense with no reflections or echoing sounds, but also in a conceptual sense. The corporate, carpet wrapped office core simplicity of it all, and then something bleeding and beating and mangled at the centre.