lilbluekit

The heart wants what it wants. The body needs what it needs. The brain knows they are both daydreaming fools, yet tries to convince them both to accept things how they are. But things that have been said have planted seeds of curiosity, hope, and (surprisingly) doubt. What would life be like to have both the wants and the needs fully met? Could they be? When does one confess the feelings that have been growing? They would be well received, wouldn’t they? Surely, as wonderful as the daydreams built by these questions and hopes are, the reality is that it will never work. None of it. Not what there is now, not what there might be if one only became brave enough to share. None of it will work because at the core there must be something wrong if despite having more than most, there is still more wanted. It’s less about greed, and more about an inability to be satisfied. Needy, not greedy. At least not on purpose. When does one give up on the wants and needs and just prays that what one has will be enough?

It’s late when the world stills enough to actually breathe and focus on more than the daily chaos. The moon is my confidante, the keeper of all my heartaches and worries, my dreams and wishes. She is the one to grant me peace when it can be given. Her glow gives life to night’s magic as it drifts through my windows and kisses my tears. Elsewhere the same moon shines her peace and magic down on those I hold dear. Do they confide in her too? Maybe a day will come when I won’t need her light to soothe my racing mind, maybe someday life will be easier to bear. Simpler anyway. But the mom hasn’t told me when that will be or what it will look like.