A perpetually exhausted pigeon

Tighari is the kind of man to help calm you down by pulling the threads from your hair and reminding you the spider is most likely out hunting, no where near its web, so you have nothing to fear. Only then does he smack the spider off your back while your distracted. "Thank Archons it wasn't venomous..." he whispers once the two of you are inside your shared dwelling, he spent the night dusting to ensure no other spiders could hide in your home.

Cyno is the kind of man who will delicately clean the threads from your face, kindly reassure your saftey alongside him, and pluck the spider from your head before proceeding to throw it as faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar away as possible. "Out of sight, out of mind." He says as you walk further away from the webs. You almost felt bad for the spider.

Kaveh is the kind of man who will laugh at you for walking into a spiders web, only to fall into an even bigger web a few feet away. He screams once the realization sets in that he has three spiders in his hair. "Don't- STOP LAUGHING AT ME! KILL THEM! HELP! He screams as you and Mehrak carefully remove the spiders from his long, blonde locks. It is only later that night, as Kaveh has been banished to the couch, that he realizes with horror...there was a fourth.

Alhaitham is the kind of man who watches you freak out over having a spider in your hair for a bit before plucking it out and tossing it toward a tree. He finds no reason for you to have freaked out that much over, "such a small thing."

"Besides, that one wasn't even that venomous...at worst you would've had a mild headach-"

With that rousing speech, Alhaitham joined Kaveh on the Couch of Banishment. Mehrak was more than willing to take their places as your cuddle buddy for the night.

"Is it still there, did you get it out!?" Kaveh whimpered as the spider escaped under the door. He was still unaware that the beast had fled after being smacked by a Claymore.

Alhaitham, however, did notice the spider flee from the home. However, the scholar was too preoccupied to make that fact known. "Would flowers make them feel better or would chocolate be better?"

Kaveh spun around and smacked Alhaitham with a pillow, "I'm gonna banish you outside if ya don't get the damn spider out of my hair!"

Wanderer is the kind of man who will blow away the spiders web before the two of you walk into it. You'll just freak out if you see it, so, it's best to save the two of you the worry and hassle. Practical and sweet, only for you and Buer of course, you wouldn't have even known the web was there if he had not told you about it. As you pass the remains of the web, a large, angry spiders rears uo on its legs and hisses at the both of you before being blown away with a flick of Wanderers wrist. Before you know it, there is an angry spider plotting revenge against the puppet.

Wanderer shrugged off the spider the size of your head, he's seen worse, he reassures. "I'm not hollow, so the worst that thing could think of doing is biting into my arm and breaking its fangs...why are you making that face?"

"It's alarming the first thing you thought of was that it would crawl inside you."

Wanderer grimaced, scratching at his arm nervously. "I had to pull eggs of Nahids favorite doll last week, it wasn't a pleasant experience i wanna repe-"

Imagine Lohen dragging a group of new recruits into the woods for training, today's lesson, Trust No One.

The camps set up, fire burning bright and warm, not a single stone out of place. The soldiers can't figure out why everyone told them to resign after learning their placements are within the fifth company. Vice captain Lohen has been so nice, after all, he even showed them how to lure the squirells over to pet them!

Then, as the night bleeds into dawn, under the cover of the forest, the squirells attack. As a unit they are strong, alone they are nothing.

And Lohen watches in amusement, as five men run screaming from the murder squirells.

The rabbits are the worst of them, personally trained by soulstealer and doomfanger to eliminate all in their path. Even cuter than the squirell menace, but just as easy to be taken behind enemy lines-for food or to become pets is unknown- for only the rabbits leave the kitchen unscathed.

Not even Varka is safe, as he spent his lunch break outrunning squirells with hearts full of hatred.

Lohen watched in amusement...before Varka yanked him out of the tree he was hiding in and threw his ass into solitary. Now the 'battle critters' are under strict supervision by Albedo to be studied and trained to avoid attacking the knights of favonius. One tried to bite Sucrose, but this only prompted her to study how it handles hillichurls.

Surprisingly, they love hillichurls! The hillichurls have even began making the more hostile animals into pets, wrapping them up in makeshift hats and scarves. It's adorable, and allows for better tracking!

So far, the others don't listen to anyone other than Lohen, since he brings them snacks and teaches them drills. They're getting smarter too! The animals in the forest are learning route patterns and simple commands.

"Stay."

"Treat?"

"Kill."

It's adorable, as long as you're not on the other end of the animals wrath.

Ocasionally, a squirell brings you little shiny rocks or trinkets, and you know exactly who hired this little delivery man. The small critters can even carry messages, as long as you give them treats before they set out and after they arrive at their destination. Lohen has begun using the animals to help keep in touch with you, often sending notes and small presents while he's away at the port or scouting around Mondstadt.

"I can't give them a refund for missing barrels unless they can prove the ship actually sunk during transport." He mutters into his breakfast. He can write a reply to the customer another time.

The owner of the Dawn Winery spends his mornings-the freaking crack of dawn- finishing off a check list for the next batch of wine being exported out of Mondstadt, ensuring not a single barrel is out of place before it departs for the port. Adeline will eventually drag him back inside for breakfast, where he is able to review the agenda for the rest of the day.

Before heading out he must sort through the incoming mail, and undoubtedly deal with less than pleasant replies from certain customers. As usual, there's complaints from a previous customer to sort through, though Diluc can't find it in him to handle such an unruly customer this early in the day.

By noon he's working a shift at Angel's share, preparing for the incoming Knights who will no doubt be 'treating themselves' after finishing their shifts for the day. Keaya is the first to arrive, still very much on the clock' and Diluc spends every minute waiting for Rosaria to come drag his brother back to work. Once Rosaria arrives and joins in slacking off, Diluc decides to take a lunch break. Thankful that the other bartenders have arrived to help run the bar. It's exhausting to say the least, but it's nice to see keaya hasn't hurt himself while Diluc was away with the Winery. He'd never admit it, but Diluc worries about his brother often.

Once the monsters have been dealt with and the patrolling knights have gone home, so to does Diluc finally return to the estate.

At night Diluc heads home, and 'The Dark Night' Hero heads off with a tip- curteousy of the calvary captain- to deal with a sighting of the Abyss Order. The commotion attracts a horde of hillichurls; and, unfortunately, a horde of cryo slimes which end up freezing his Claymore solid.

All the more reason to destroy the incoming hordes of cryo slimes.

And finally return to his beloved partner.

He tries to close the door quietly, not wanting to wake you up this late at night. The fireplace is going to combat the cold evening, so atleast you weren't cold while he was away.

However, he was rather grateful to see you were still wide awake, laying back in bed with a pile of books on your beside table.

"And where have you been?" You teased, setting aside the novel.

Diluc turns around, tossing his frozen Claymore by the fireplace. It'll melt by morning...probably.

"Slimes....too many damn slimes." He murmurs, staggering up to the bed.

You can only nod, leaning forward to catch Diluc as he falls onto the bed, still wearing his cloak. "Do you wanna change your clothes? Have some dinner?"

Diluc made a sound you could only imagine meant 'no' and wrapped his arms tightly around you, resting his head in the crook of your neck. Diluc was rather clingy when he was tired.

You ran a hand through his hair, taking down his ponytail and setting the hair ties aside on the bedside table. It would be tangled in the morning, but Dlic didn't seemed to care much about that at the moment.

"You didn't wake me up this morning." It wasn't an accusation, just an observation. You had missed him when Adeline finally dragged you out of bed, but he was already heading into town for work by the time you came down for breakfast.

Diluc nestled himself closer to you, drawn to the warmth of anything but a slime, "you were tired..." he muttered into your neck, "wanted you to rest a little more..."

"But I want to see you off in the mornings, so I know you're okay..."

"I'll wake you up next time..."

You laid back in the bed, being partially crushed under Dilucs weight as he drifted to sleep. It was a good thing the bed was so comfortable, or would would've had to wake him up just so you too could sleep.

You couldn't help but smile at how peaceful Diluc looked, it was rare for him to allow himself moments like this. To let those walls down long enough for him to relax after such a long day.

And only because a long day ends in your arms.

Drunken soldiers, nitpicking customers, cryo slime hordes, and lazy abyss spies; it's all worth the trouble if it means by the end of the day Diluc is Basking in the peace and quiet of the Winery wrapped in your arms.

If mondstadt is safe, then your safe.

And that's all that matters to Diluc.