Like Copper Like Salt

Jarda Klapek Czech brick layer and karaoke from Ostrava, tuna melt eating, Applebee's inhabiting, doppelganger aka alibi aka probable fall guy for Lestat de Lioncourt's shenanigans and possible human rights violations.

They will never figure out Lestat Jarda's real identity. Give him glasses and not even Apple Face ID can suss him out.

All of this is below a cut -- mind the tags.

I suspect this is a Rolin Jones joint. Music: Ravel's Bolero.

This is its own character in this trailer. Why? Why is this Lestat's depression music.

For the amount of times pingpong lady has appeared in trailers, she should get her own title credit at the same level as Baby Jenks.

I'm not sure why Lestat looks horrified here.

Shower Review: But if it's walking in on his tour bus shower -- nobody made him get a tour bus with a shower with no stall and eleventeen windows that don't seem to have physical shutters [iow not "smart shutters" that can malfunction with malware or ddos attack or a power failure] with a disco light waterfall showerhead on top of a wood (imitation?) floor. I'm sure Lestat enjoys giving night commuters a show. But what happens if he decides to take a dawn shower? Does he just combust naked? I'm not even sure there's a good drain here. This makes the men's locker room group showers look spacious, private and clean. Where is the rest of the band humans showering on the road? What if you have actual long hair attached to your head? I sincerely hope that Gabriella has short hair or that long hair is a wig b/c washing, drying and styling long hair takes three business days. Practicality 1/5 stars. Verve: 3/5.

I fucking hate Older Brother Vampire Bait here. Baby Lestat stutters and... was illiterate? No wonder he loves improv on a character rather than a set line. And music. Can Lestat sight read in his mortal life or does that only happen with vampire literacy?

Nothing says romance or seance like a lot of glasses and votives. Lestat is about to demonstrate his water glass skills for an intimate concert of three to seven guests?

"I think in the end I was pretty fucking great! " - This is either a really funny freakout or a really horrifying freakout.

Marius! Probably horrified at Lestat's horrible choices in home decor and home design throughout the centuries. Or maybe Lestat's violin playing effect on Akasha. I am personally horrified by this Caesar salad bowl cut he has to give himself every night in order not to look like a Merlin cosplayer in buckle shoes. Yes, those time periods do not go together.

Recording studio seance with mama?

Wow these vampires were ready to end him, hitwise.

This is not how you break pinata. Place the pinata where you can spin around blindfolded (without hitting the tv) and whack the candy out you coward!

This seems like he's giving a concert the day after halloween or he's hallucinating that. IDK

Time to talk to nature.

Is Real Rashid going to die? Or is baby Jenks wrong and she's going to die? RIP Real Rashid.

Ok, what got fire gifted here?

When your child self is latchkey kid unsupervised in a concert space around working musicians. Is child self reading? This is right in the middle of a section when Louis is asking adult vampire Lestat if he's fucking his vampire mother fledgling right now. The giant hand right by the child!?

Claudia in her trial outfit. I'm guessing this is before he goes on tour with the band.

I'm not sure who the woman is on the left but Antoinette sitting by a typewriter staring you down eating a sausage? A finger?

This is a mirror or a record but I think Lestat's just been turned here. Somehow I don't think Jefferson Airplane vinyl was involved but every memory we've seen it looks like Lestat is actively hallucinating.

Taking down someone who is literally dusty here.

Claudia is either repeating lines he's heard before or this is a remix from something else. Who is the "skinny little bitch?"

Toss the vampire! Whee!

This is obviously the masked guy during Lestat's freakout about how good of a job he's doing. Not ye old Parisian vampire playing ring toss the vampire in the 1790s.

Did Lestat write this himself? Was chat je pété used? Either way user The Vampire Lestat is not even the #1 Lestat scholar...(ha ha )

This is delusional and bombastic:

Lestat de Lioncourt's Genius bio: Step into the limelight with Lestat de Lioncourt, a name that echoes through the corridors of music and mystery alike. With the debut of his first single, “Long face,” this iconic “vampire” has captured the world’s attention, earning rave reviews from critics and fans alike. This haunting melody, a blend of timeless elegance and dark allure, is just a glimpse into the multifaceted genius of the Vampire Lestat. But Lestat’s talents don’t stop at the microphone. Lestat, renowned not only as a musician and composer but also as an accomplished actor and shrewd businessman, is a true Renaissance figure of the modern era. His foray into music is complemented by an exciting upcoming project: a documentary directed by Pulitzer Prize-winning filmmaker Daniel Molloy, promising an intimate look into Lestat’s enigmatic world. From the silver screen to the boardroom, and now the recording studio, Lestat de Lioncourt proves that he’s more than a legend of lore; he’s a contemporary force, captivating audiences across all realms of art and enterprise. Keep an eye on this luminous trailblazer, for his creative journey is bound to leave an indelible mark on both the earthly and the supernatural.

"a name that echoes through the corridors of music and mystery alike" Someone was up until the wee hours of the night morning relistening to Andrew Lloyd Webber and was a minute away from getting DCMA taken down from calling a song "Music of the Night". Or this is just a fancy way of saying Lestat did musical dinner theater mystery murder gigs?

Keep in mind, in-universe, nobody knows who this guy is apart from his groupies for at best a year.

"haunting melody" doesn't describe Long Face musically in any way, at best it's an ear worm, which is not the same, or I've been haunted by several commercial jingles.

"a blend of timeless elegance and dark allure" Again, not the song at all, it's something you use to describe a heavy cologne.

"shrewd businessman" How is he a "shrewd businessman?" Isn't that Louis du Lac? What's Lestat’s cover story for being rich? He literally is living off a trust (he got from being murder suicided into vampirism.) If anything Louis is the shrewd businessman [his Dubai fortune, his burgeoning real estate empire in San Francisco]. Is he meta-textually referring to possible tie-ins in AMC (pom juice)? Meh.

"Accomplished actor" - he's stretching with his five minutes two years on the Parisian stage in 1793 ish? Or his one night only performance at Louis's trial? Or reality tv

Is he going to claim he wrote the "Wolverine Blues"? [He's not putting "Come to Me" on his rock album, lmao]

meta comment: Louis, Louis, stop writing fanfiction giving your white boyfriend credit for something black musicians did. That's one of many reasons Jelly Roll decided go north.

Louis claims he recorded and played all the instruments himself for "Come to Me." The AMC show premiere this season on June 7. Who was born on June 7th, and famously played all 27 instruments on his debut album For You and pretty much treated his bands as backup bands? PRINCE. In the book Lestat's first concert on his tour is in San Francisco at the Cow Palace, which holds 16,500 seats, a stadium Prince filled on his Purple Rain tour. Based on what we've seen of Satan's Night Out in the trailers, they couldn't hold a candle to the weakest of Prince's performance bands. Sorry, Lestat is no Prince (March 3, 1985 concert)

I suspect the show is going to give Nicholas' talents (in the books he's good enough to be a student of Mozart's who cannot help him get a royal composer gig) and compositions and plays to him or he's just going to claim all of those were his. Good thing Nicholas never haunts his ass in the books, waving his stumps around, complaining about his quill and violin carpal tunnel syndrome.

At least he doesn't claim to be an author and/or playwright. That might rest in Claudia’s diaries, or Sam's ( or Nicholas's) plays and Claudia will haunt him for copyright infringement and royalties on top of all the other ways he did her dirty.

How would he be "foraying into music if he claims to be "renowned" as a musician and composer already?

"Pulitzer Prize-winning filmmaker Daniel Molloy" There is one kernel of truth. In universe, Daniel Molloy is directing a documentary about him, and Daniel did win two Pulitzers. But he never won a Pulitzer Prize for filmmaking [afaik per other sites like the fake Linkedin] so "Pultizer Prize-winning filmmaker" is a bit misleading -- as you cannot win a Pulitzer Prize for film-making or making a documentary (and no one ever has.)

"silver screen" When was he in a movie? What kind of movie? Porn? Talamasca's NextDoor footage?

"legend of lore" What lore? Daniel Molloy's book? AD&D? Is he Bigfoot?

Louis du Lac definitely didn't write any of this.

Louis: "the lack of metaphor is so striking"

Lestat (having a time delayed argument ~90 years later and replying with something else): "Fuck you! Have all the similies! And the metaphors! I am the best! Beyoncé cannot sing! I am the "Renaissance" figure! I belong in the Louvre! Not her! My portrait! Not the gremlin!"

Meanwhile Gremlin lived during the *drumroll* Renaissance. With (book) Marius who attempted to be a polymath but did not really succeed with his paint by numbers studio, Roman baths, and house tours and Roman histories which he burnt. Marius later attempted amateur filmmaking in 20th century.

I wonder if in-universe Daniel Molloy is already in in art museums. There are several museums Eric Bogosian is in, as a subject of art or adjacent to one of his early experimental shows.

"Multifaceted genius" - trope-tastic phrase, but now I wonder if he's describing himself as a prism, literal prism and has now ascended after discovering Pink Floyd.

"luminous trailblazer" Yes it's a metaphor, but literally this is funny. He's not the moon. He's not a glowing light source setting things on fire in his wake for a path 💀. Or will he be? I think he's going to fight the Beyhive, lose, and then enter Sandman Akasha.