materialistic narcissist

lemme tell u bout dis s c a m of a lifetime.

i decided to go to mîcháels today— mostly in search of some art supplies, but i’ve been eyeing this storage cart for a while. i had it in the back of my mind that i could possibly cop one.

i walked in and saw that there was only 2 people working, both distracted. still, the registers are next to the doors.

i went to the shopping carts, got one, and looked around a little. i got to where they keep these storage units and put one in my cart. i also got some new fabër-castêlls and mïcrøn pens whilst walking around after this. i concea/ed in a blind spot, but i also did something else; i pulled out an old receipt.

i get to the front of the store with the thing in my cart and i pick up the receipt, standing by the registers, regardless of the fact that nobody has noticed me. i pretend to be waiting, even though there wasn’t anyone checking anyone out and one employee was messing with a broken register trying to fix it. i then pretended to be frustrated, looked at my receipt, and then just grabbed the box and walked out (as if i was tryin to return the unit and just decided to walk away).

can’t say i’m not freaked out, because it was kind of bold, but with no cameras and non attentive SAs, i think i’m ok. and i have a cool new art cart now :))

saved: $59 + $135 in art supplies

first and foremost, always conceal in a blindspot! if there aren’t any natural ones, duck down to create one or, if you’re with a lifting buddy, have them stand between you and the camera.

♥ clothing rack

pick up an item and walk over to a clothing rack. go to a clothing rack and, with the same hand as the item, pretend to look through the clothes. as your hand is deep in the rack, either sleeve the item or drop it into your purse. this is a great, natural way to create a blindspot. 

♥ double and sleeve

this is the most basic sleight-of-hand and is something every lifter needs to have in their tool belt. this works for long and small items, like lipgloss or mascara. grab two of the same item, hold them as if they’re one, and slide one into your sleeve. you can do this while swinging your arm to propel the item into your sleeve, or just put it subtly in with your fingers. 

♥ drop

this works for bigger items. wedge several items between your elbow and ribs.  “accidentally” drop one of them from your elbow into your bag as if you had too many items and one of them just fell into your bag accidentally. 

♥ lightning conceal

this one is literally just putting something into your purse as quickly as possible. ONLY do this in a blindspot as it’s very obvious the intent is to steal the item. 

♥ starbucks cup

get an opaque coffee cup, cut an X into the bottom, and shove little items (concealer, lip gloss, mascara etc) into it. if you do it properly they shouldn’t fall you. you can also pad the cup. 

♥ food bag

get a bag of food from the mall food court. eat some and leave some food in there. drop items into your bag. if you get sussed, you can eat food out of the bag. an alternative of this is to put a hole in the side of the bag and put items through the hole rather than just through the top of the bag. 

♥ armpit

tuck something under your armpit and either walk out with it there or walk to a blindspot and lightning conceal. 

♥ long skirt

wear tight spandex and, when squatting in front of a low shelf at sephora or ulta, push your skirt up slightly and slide a small item into it. pallettes may fit in the waistband. make sure you practice this at home to make sure they’re tight enough and nothing will fall out.

♥ phone

i lifted flowers for myself bc my boyfriend n i are fighting but i still love him so i lifted lingerie and gifts for him for vday i’m unstable

ulta: rockateur: $29 MB gel: $25 MB cleanser: $15 MB moisturizer: $18 MB buffering lotion: $19 tarte mascara: $23 brow wiz: $21 UD primer: $34 benefit primer: $31

kohls: frat boy blush: $13 even stevn foundation: $22 girls getaway trio: $25 balm voyage: $40 aloe socks (2x$10): $20 bra: $36

sallys: palladio brow gel: $5 face secrets brush: $5 hair dye: $5

aerie: undies: $13 leggings: $20 bathing suit bottoms: $37 top: $33 one piece bathing suit: $44

VS: bra: $60 one piece: $60 red panties: $17

target: its a 10: $20 batiste: $13 epic ink liner: $8 nyx slip tease: $8 nyx lip liner: $4 nix soft matte lip cream: $8 beuaty blenders:  $10 bathing suit: $40

weis: hella protein bars: $20???? coffees: $7???

I went into town today with a pair of scissors and a stitch remover to try out removing tags for the first time ever. 

The leather crop was about $40 from MYER. The tags there are made in a way that makes it really difficult to take off without making a huge hole, but then I found this top and it only had a sticker on the swing tag that I just ripped off. 

The skirt was $60 from General Pants and I’m seriously in love with it! I grabbed two other pairs of shorts along with the skirt and went into the change room, poked a hole with the stitch remover and put the tag in a pair of shorts which I put back in the sale section. 

I haven’t been that nervous in a long time, I’m so relieved that none of the sales assistants tried to talk to me because my voice probably woulda been shakey as hell. 

The “ Fuck me “ haul. Only 10 pictures so I have to post the rest separate??

This applies to Panera as well as any restaurant that keeps prepaid online/ to-go orders out in the open for people to pick up…

Usually I’ll just walk in and go to the shelf that they keep the bags on and I read the labels pretending that I’m looking for my name. If I see something I like I’ll grab it and walk out casually.

IF YOU’RE PICKY LIKE ME…and nothing there sounds good, I’ll either sit down and pretend I’m waiting for my order and when they put a new one up I’ll check that one out.

Orrrr you can just sit down for a little while and then ask the expo person “hey how long on the online order for *insert name*”. When they tell you they don’t have a to-go order by that name, they’ll probably ask what it was. That’s when you tell them what you really want (don’t get too much or it’ll be sus) and VOILA they’ll make it for you and apologize :-)

Some of these might seem pretty obvious but I just know from other ppl irl they don’t seem to do/know this and spend heaps of money when they don’t necessarily have to. Sorry if this is disappointing 😂

💸My fav thing to do is scope out stores I like on their online store. For example I like c1tybe@ch a lot, and they stock a lot of nice CK underwear. But a bitch knows I’m not finna pay $49.99 for a pair of underwear, and for some reason my hook hasn’t been working on their tags.

SO I checked them out online, not only did they have a waaaay larger range of CK on their site than in store, but at least half the range was reduced. So I bought a pair of underwear and 3 bralettes for half price or more, things that were better than they had in store. I saved $90.00 from that.

💸A fake/decoy/spare email- so you know when you go online or in store and they always harass you for your email with the offer of 30% off your next shop when you sign up! (I kno it’s annoying when SA do that but trust me they’re being forced to by their managers-speaking from personal experience here).

Give them the spare email, take advantage of the money off. It may not seem like much but I have gotten basically free postage, or a considerable chunk of money taken off my orders online from doing this. Saving any amount is good. I got $15 off an order from l@terg@tor which left me paying hardly anything. Sometimes you can even earn points and get money off.

💸The shops “per kilo/LB etc” scam. Sneaky ass grocery shops love doing this. Once I was shopping with my dumbass man child ex, and he wanted grapes and was like “mad they’re only $3 a kg!” But they were prepackaged in a bag. He went to grab them and I was like hold up bitch, and I weighed the bag and the bag was 2.2kg. So I plucked off the excess amount til it was a kg. He didn’t even consider this. I know it doesn’t seem like much money but honestly it ALLLL ADDS UP. Grocery shops do this with a lot of their prepackaged shit, always check.

💸If something you like is on sale, grab a few. This seems so obvious but like my friends for some reason don’t do this. I am not out of my fav exfoliator and cleanser. They’re nearly full but they cost $10 each, they’re on sale for $5.70 so I got 2 or 3. This is especially great for people who don’t have a consistent or steady income, what happens if you run out at the same time you run out of money? Skin gon be fucked up til your next cheque.

💸DO SOME RESEARCH- LEARN YOUR SKIN TYPE AND LEARN ABOUT INFREDIENTS. DIY your shit. A full set of acrylics cost me $50, and that’s for a basic ass set, and infills every 2-3weeks is $35. Fuck that mess. Watch YouTube tutorials. Buy(or lift) the products and equipment you need. Say for tips, glue, monomer/polymer and top coat (or bond-aid, base coat etc if you wanna be full professional and bougie) costs $80 (in Australia that’s about what it’d cost for the absolute basics depending) that’s $80 for MONTHS or possibly a years worth of nails. And it’s a fun skill to learn.

Skin care, $30 for 60g of bentonite clay mask? I think the fuck not you trick ass bitch. Do your research on skin and learn what you need. 1kg of organic natural bentonite is $20-30 on eBay. That’s literally years worth of amazing skin cleansing action. Don’t believe what cosmetic and skin companies peddle out to you. They giving you shitty chemical filled product at fucked up inflated prices. You don’t need 28 different petrochemical oils and fragrances on your face. $80 for farsali face oil? Don’t be tricked by the pretty colours and sparkles it’s glorified fools gold. $12 bio oil is the BEST shit I have ever used on my face. It doesn’t stop there, what’s great for healing your skin? Zinc. What’s expensive as fuxk? Zinc supplements that you don’t even know are going to work if you ingest them. What costs $6 and no one knows about? Sudo-cream. Nappy cream. Zinc oxide cream. You got a pimple or broken skin? Smear that white gold on your face before bed like a mask and wake up and wash it off tomorrow to see that goood shit work. DO YOUR RESEARCH. $150 for a lash growth serum huh? If it’s $150 it gotta work. And you know what, it does. I use it. My lashes are fuxkin long and lush. Do you know what doesn’t work? Paying $150 for 10ml of product. There is a glaucoma eyedrop medication that is the same shit as what they put in lash serum which is what makes them grow. An online pharmacy can have it for under $10. You’re welcome. (Don’t put the eye drops in your eye, just the lash line)

💸if you’re not into walk out lifts at grocery shops and you buy them, know what you need before you go in. Then go online or check their catalogues to see what’s on sale. Always check the reduced section. Don’t blindly pay for shit. Check multiple grocery shop catalogues and online to see where has the sales on what you need. PRO TIP: in Australia at least, there is a law that say, if steak is advertised at $8/kg, and you scan it and it comes to anything MORE than $8/kg, you get it for free. So ALWAYS FUXKIN CHECK WHO DOESNT LOVE FREE MEAT EXCL VEGANS/VEGETARIANS!?

💸Another probably obvious one, is to do grocery shopping towards the closing time. Fresh/cooked foods will be reduced as fuxk because they can’t sell them the next day. I’m talkin roasted chickens/meat, pre-made salads and sandwiches, sushi, pre-made pasta/rice etc you can always grab a bargain.

💸NUTS, expensive as fuck right? Well they are in Australia homeboy. Some places have bags/containers of nuts and a self serve nut bar. Compare the prices. A kg of almonds might be $10 from the self serve bar, and a 650g container of almonds might be $8, what would you buy?

🌸🌷The Cat is in the Bag Haul🌷🌸

🌸 Pink kitty mini backpack: $19.99

💐 Pencil cases: (they move and shift but idk what it’s called :P) $2.99 ea (x2)

🌷Cute lil composition books: $1.99 ea (x3)

🌼 Panda pencil pouch🐼: $1.99

🌸🌷Tax & Total Saved: $32.72💕🌷🌸

figured i’d make a post about things i’ve personally learned boosting since i’ve only ever seen one other real post about it but it’s fucking awesome.keep in mind, i only started boosting the day after christmas, so it’s only been about two weeks now, and i only use P0shmark and Merccari but i’ve already made over $700 :-) if u dont wanna read the whole thing you can skim by just checking out the stuff in italics

things that sell fast and are easy to lift: -Better Than Sex mascaras (waterproof or normal) I sell these for about $13 on p0shmark and they normally go within a day or two -Tarte shape tape (if you want to keep the fact that these are stolen items, i’d only ever lift the same shade or similar shades. it’s kinda shady if one days you’re selling a fair neutral and a week later you’re selling a dark saying “it was a christmas gift and doesn’t match me” like bitch we all know nobody thought for a sec that that was your color lmaooo) -ANYTHING FENTY BEAUTY holy shit. small easy things in this line include the highlight palettes and the match stix trios -NARS blushes (specifically Orgasm and Deep Throat bc they’re popular on the internet) (i sell these in bundles of two and they go within the first 2 days) -NARS Laguna bronzer -BECCA highlighters -Too Faced sweet peach lip glosses -Kat Von D tattoo liner -Anastasia brow wiz

-small jewelry from american eagle, anthropolgie, francescas, hot topic things that sell fast and aren’t so easy to lift: -any of the fucking urban decay naked palettes -any of the fucking too faced sweet peach/chocolate palettes -subculture and modern renaissance holy shit these normally are out of my hands within minutes of being posted -high end perfumes (i don’t even fuck with this shit) -FENTY palette -literally like any palette that you hear beauty gurus on youtube mention ever -anything limited edition -shirts and sweats from PINK or VS (but mostly PINK) (but you pretty much have to make sure that logo is somewhere apparent on the garment bc that’s all people care about for real)  pretty much anything from the following brands will sell within a week at a decent price: -too faced, urban decay, tarte, anastasia, MAC, NARS, Lancome, Kat Von D, Benefit, Marc Jacobs, Chanel, PINK and VS, brandy melville, free people, Calvin Klein things you think might sell fast but actually won’t -bras from PINK or VS (bc there are so many fucking sizes) -foundations & concealers (bc there are so many fucking shades)

-skin care products (bc no one really gives a shit)

-stuff from Lush (people are hella sus of buying Lush products from places other than lush idky) (but if you’re gonna you’re gonna want to make sure to post a pic of the expiration date and if it’s outdated the price has to decrease by like 70% sorry babes) -anything high-end that isn’t spoken a lot about by beauty gurus on youtube (example: laura geller. her shit is awesome but nobody on p0sh cares about it bc she doesn’t give her shit away to youtubers for free reviews) other random tips -if you’re not selling a whole lot or you want to sell items quicker for whatever reason, do research on what are the hottest products in the hottest brands at any given time. limited edition shit will always sell well after it’s removed from the shelves, but people will still buy stuff from you even if it’s still selling in stores. example: look up “best drugstore lipsticks” and lift 5 of them and sell all 5 as a bundle for $15-$20. example: watch popular beauty gurus on youtube and their 2017 favorites videos. products that are repeated multiple times by multiple different people should go into a lift list for you. items like this, at the moment, include: tarte shape tape, tart gifted mascara, urban decay perversion mascara, laura merceir powder (you can get the tiny ones at sephora a lot of the time), mario badescu facial spray, MAC lipstick in velvet teddy and honey love, urban decay all nighter setting spray, NARS laguna bronzer, anastasia brow wiz, any of the mascaras by benefit, naked heat palette, sweet peach palette -take pics of the highlighters you’re trying to sell in good ass lighting where those bitches TWINKLE. this sounds like a dumb tip but good lighting (for everything really) is really important i’ve found -keep in mind the shipping price on whatever you’re selling. on p0sh it’s a flat rate of like $7 for the buyer, so you can’t sell something at full price or even $7 beneath full price because that will make no sense to the buyer. As a rule of thumb, if it’s a lifted good i’m selling, i sell it for about 45% off. if 45% off still doesn’t cover shipping costs then you have to knock it down a few more bucks. So basically anything that sells at retail price for $14 or less you’ll have to cut it down more than 45% in order for the buyer to consider it a good sale. Often times people on p0sh will ask if you will sell the same thing to them on Merrrcari and some ppl think this is sus but honestly people just want the better shipping options Merrcari offers -BUNDLE ITEMS. for exmaple: instead of just selling ONE pantie for $5 to 6 people and then having to package 6 boxes with one pantie each, just sell 5 panties as a bundle for $15-$20 to one person. this is still a good sale for the buyer, you make more money quicker, and you have less work to do -if you want to be cautious of anyone finding out that the items you’re selling are stolen, make every clothing piece the same size (or at least around the same size) with maybe the occasional “this was a christmas gift and it’s too large/small for me yadda yadda yadda”. Also, you DON’T have to and really SHOULDN’T provide “reasons” as to why you’re selling everything you’re selling. non-suspicious people don’t even consider explaining why they’re selling the item, and if you prelude every sale with a “this was too big/small”, “not my color”, “ my fashion style has changed” etc, it’ll look more like you have something to hide than if you didn’t say anything at all. Also, i know you’ll probably be apprehensive of including any real pictures of yourself for your info page, but the more innocent and non suspicious and typical you look to the public the more typical you will seem. you could also prob find pics online and use those and use like a fake college -include pics of the serial numbers of EVERY makeup product you purchase and boost, assuming you really did steal it and its authentic. this eliminates any suspicions that you’re selling fake goods, which is a common suspicion people have when one is selling a lot of high-end product for relatively cheap, with new things constantly showing up in their closet -take good fucking pictures. just fucking do it. it helps so much. it makes you look professional and gives people reason to trust you and your “business”. also be fucking nice

-pretty stuff will always sell faster than ugly stuff. this is why palettes and highlighters go quicker than, say, skin care. skin care items are often items that have to be sought out, where as the sweet peach pallete is something someone may not have known they even wanted until they saw it posted. you know? doesn’t matter how high end that skin care is bby people on apps like p0sh and merc are only window shopping for shit they dont’ have to worry about not working out. appeal to the single moms drunk on wine scrolling through their phones at 11pm