Liam Hackett

taming yourself in order to please others 

letting fear hold you back from your dreams 

focusing on what other people think and say about you 

Remember that it’s about them and not you. Shield yourself from their negative energy and keep in mind that happy, confident people don’t go out of their way to try and drag others down. Rise above it and stay true to you. We all encounter rude and toxic people, but only you get to decide on how little or how much they affect you. 

Honestly, I felt so many emotions (and still do) - I’ve had major imposter syndrome throughout the entire process of writing FEARLESS, but then had moments of absolute clarity and excitement. It’s an emotional rollercoaster and so unique because you put out a certain vulnerability when you’ve worked so hard on something and then put it out into the world for others to consume and review. In all though it’s been an amazing process and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed writing it and sharing so many important lessons with the world.

Well firstly congratulations - it’s great that you’ve agreed to do something even though it terrifies you. It’s perfectly normal to be nervous and no matter how much you do something, nerves will always be there - it’s a sign that you really care about what you’re doing. My advice is to spend time practicing, maybe try playing in front of small groups if you’re able to. 

On the actual day, focus on your breathing - try some calming mindfulness before you go on stage or do whatever it is you need to do to feel a little bit less tense. I have a few things I do before I go on stage, the first is to change your language - instead of saying you’re anxious and nervous, say that you are excited, you’ll be amazed at the difference that makes. Another tip is to reflect on what it actually is that’s making you feel scared, whether it’s your performance, or the response from the crowd or whatever it is. Once you’ve figured it out, use a mantra to counteract those thought patterns. For example: if you’re worried you’ll mess up your performance and scared the audience won’t enjoy it, say and repeat something like... I’m a great performer, I know what I’m going to perform and the audience will love me. Use the mantra whenever feelings of nervousness set in.

You’ll most likely find that after about 30 seconds, your nerves will start to settle and you’ll begin to relax and enjoy the experience. Good luck and keep at it! It does get easier.

Tumblr, ahhhhh! You’ve given me all the feels and if it wasn’t for pizza I could honestly sit here all evening answering all of the questions you sent. I’m so sorry if I didn’t get to your question, I tried to answer as many as I could in the time that I had. Thank you to all of you for sending your lovely questions, especially the ones telling me I look like Alexander Skarsgård (I don’t see it but v v happy to accept, I stan True Blood). 

I hope my advice has helped you on your journey to becoming fearless. I really can’t recommend my debut book, FEARLESS enough. I know I’m a bit biased but I put my heart and soul into this book and this was exactly what I needed when I was growing up. You can get your copy here. 

If you need advice or support, or got something on your mind, please don’t leave your question in my message box - you can post it to the Ditch the Label support community and get advice from our amazing support team for free - doesn’t matter what the issue is, there’s always somebody there to listen, so please utilise it! 

Give me a follow for good vibes on your timeline.

Okay so I just counted the amount of pages in FEARLESS that talk about pressure and there’s 18! It’s a huge focus of the book - whether it’s pressure from your mates, society, social media or big brands. It seems like it’s definitely your vibe. 

Ultimately, find the right tribes and surround yourself with health relationships. A relationship based on conditionality of you acting a certain way or doing something the other person wants is not healthy. 

Yes to all of those things. Even though I just turned 29 and edging closer to my 30′s, I still don’t feel like an adult - I’m not sure you ever really do. We all worry but you can never let it rule your life - worrying just makes it happen twice. Easier said than done sometimes, but you’re not alone. 

I’ll keep it to 5 key tips bc I’m running out of time and pizza:

1. Know that everybody else is feeling the exact same way and in the same situation are you

2. Use college as an opportunity to be whoever it is you want to be

3. In your first few weeks, you’ll find that people will be super keen to meet new people and make as many friends as possible, so if like I was, you’re scared of talking to new people, make the most of it and push yourself out of your comfort zone as often as you can

4. Find your tribe, this is a great opportunity to join societies and clubs of people with shared interests, your college may also have Facebook Groups or forums for new students to meet before the start of term

5. Start to change your language - it’s possible to trick your brain into converting feelings of anxiety and nervousness into excitement, just by saying you’re excited and shifting your mind to the positives and new opportunities you’re about to be given.

There’s so much more I could say because having gone through the same thing, I know it isn’t as simple as a 5 step process, it’s much deeper than that. I would say that Chapters 2, 3 and 5 of FEARLESS will be especially helpful for you.

Good luck!

First thing: normal is just an illusion society creates in order to try and pressure us all into conforming to crappy ideals. 

Whilst it may feel isolating at times, you definitely aren’t alone and I would argue we all experience some degree of anxiety. I’m not a doctor so I can’t comment on your treatment, but for me there are different things that help when I’m feeling anxious. Mantras, meditation, rest, exercise, tidying up (no idea), gaming -- find the things that help you with your day to day and go slow. 

The best progress is gradual progress, small daily challenges and changes are the best ways to heal. I know it sounds cliche but ‘a journey of a thousand miles starts with just one step’ is so unbelievably true. 

There are a bunch of articles and tips that I think you’d might like to read, hope they help. I’d also really recommend you spoke to your doctor and if possible, explore options of CBT therapy - I know it has a high success rate for anxiety. Remember that anxiety doesn’t define you and is treatable. 

Hope this helps a little on your journey,

You can’t, I’m here forever.

It’s never too late to change your mind. You don't have to have it all figured out yet, some people do and that’s fine, but many haven’t which is also okay. Have an open mind and try as many things as you can, follow your heart and go with what will not only pay your bills but will also feed your soul. There’s an entire chapter all about careers and figuring it out in FEARLESS, chapter 6 (I just checked and the second page of that chapter literally says in bold caps IT’S NEVER TOO LATE TO CHANGE YOUR MIND.)

You’ve got this and you will be exactly where you’re meant to be.

I think we all have our own individual journeys when it comes to being fearless, and it means different things to different people. When I think about the person I was 15 years ago, I would walk around with my head down hoping nobody would notice me. I didn’t have many friends and didn’t think much of myself. I’d struggle to talk in front of 3 people, never mind an entire room. Today I’m a completely different person and I’m no longer afraid of what other people might think or say about me. Fear is no longer something that holds me back, it’s just something that I observe and overcome. Fear to me is a challenge and I think facing your fears, whether it be fear of rejection, failure, large audiences or putting yourself out there, is something we all must do in order to live our best, happiest and most confident lives. Becoming Fearless isn’t just a journey and something you achieve, it’s something you have to stick to - a mantra and a new way of life.

In FEARLESS, I talk about some of the biggest fears we all have and share tools and techniques needed to overcome them. Here’s the chapter list:

Fear of being yourself (delves a lot into stereotypes and societal pressures)

Fear of being judged (looks a lot into unconscious biases and how people make snap judgements, including methods to make your judgements more informed and friendlier)

Fear of not fitting in (finding your tribe and understanding personalities, how they’re formed and adaptive behaviours)

Fear of your emotions (all about mental health and managing your emotions)

Fear of expressing yourself (explores interests and hobbies and the links with stereotypes and societal pressures)

Fear of being a failure (my toolkit on figuring it all out career wise)

Fear of not being good enough (everything from body image and beauty ideals to building confidence and self-esteem)