#liam hackett answer time

Firstly, please don’t ever feel rushed. Take your time and do what feels right for you. Know that your sexuality is a natural and wonderful part of you and although some people may not like it, that’s their problem and it isn’t ever anything you should try to change. Remember that the problem isn’t in LGBTQ+ identities, but the negative attitudes and prejudices that plague our society. If you’re not sure about your sexuality, that’s okay too. Don’t allow anybody to pressure you into putting a label to it or making your mind up because you don’t have to. Take it slow and go easy on yourself.

Surround yourself by people who are like you, whether they are people you know offline or people you meet online. Just speaking with other LGBTQ+ people and learning about their coming out experiences, will make you feel less alone. Seek out your role models and always remember that things really do get better. Not every coming out story is a positive one and sometimes it may not be safe to come out. If you suspect the people you live with may reject you, it may be an idea to either have a backup plan for the worst case scenario, or delay your coming out to them until you are no long dependent on them - and I hate to give that kind of advice because in an ideal world, people would understand it for what it is and never take issue with it, but we’re not quite there yet. 

When it feels right, start by telling somebody you trust and who you feel will be supportive of you. I know for me, once I said those words for the very first time, it felt like such a huge weight had been lifted. 

There’s a ton more information available here:

Top 11 tips for coming out: https://www.ditchthelabel.org/top-11-tips-for-coming-out-as-lesbian-gay-or-bi/

How to come out to homophobic parents: https://www.ditchthelabel.org/coming-out-homophobic-parents/ 

8 tips for coming out as trans: https://www.ditchthelabel.org/8-tips-for-coming-out-as-trans/

Can’t figure it out? This quiz might help: https://www.ditchthelabel.org/can-we-guess-your-sexuality/

Tumblr, ahhhhh! You’ve given me all the feels and if it wasn’t for pizza I could honestly sit here all evening answering all of the questions you sent. I’m so sorry if I didn’t get to your question, I tried to answer as many as I could in the time that I had. Thank you to all of you for sending your lovely questions, especially the ones telling me I look like Alexander Skarsgård (I don’t see it but v v happy to accept, I stan True Blood). 

I hope my advice has helped you on your journey to becoming fearless. I really can’t recommend my debut book, FEARLESS enough. I know I’m a bit biased but I put my heart and soul into this book and this was exactly what I needed when I was growing up. You can get your copy here. 

If you need advice or support, or got something on your mind, please don’t leave your question in my message box - you can post it to the Ditch the Label support community and get advice from our amazing support team for free - doesn’t matter what the issue is, there’s always somebody there to listen, so please utilise it! 

Give me a follow for good vibes on your timeline.

I’ll keep it to 5 key tips bc I’m running out of time and pizza:

1. Know that everybody else is feeling the exact same way and in the same situation are you

2. Use college as an opportunity to be whoever it is you want to be

3. In your first few weeks, you’ll find that people will be super keen to meet new people and make as many friends as possible, so if like I was, you’re scared of talking to new people, make the most of it and push yourself out of your comfort zone as often as you can

4. Find your tribe, this is a great opportunity to join societies and clubs of people with shared interests, your college may also have Facebook Groups or forums for new students to meet before the start of term

5. Start to change your language - it’s possible to trick your brain into converting feelings of anxiety and nervousness into excitement, just by saying you’re excited and shifting your mind to the positives and new opportunities you’re about to be given.

There’s so much more I could say because having gone through the same thing, I know it isn’t as simple as a 5 step process, it’s much deeper than that. I would say that Chapters 2, 3 and 5 of FEARLESS will be especially helpful for you.

Good luck!

First thing: normal is just an illusion society creates in order to try and pressure us all into conforming to crappy ideals. 

Whilst it may feel isolating at times, you definitely aren’t alone and I would argue we all experience some degree of anxiety. I’m not a doctor so I can’t comment on your treatment, but for me there are different things that help when I’m feeling anxious. Mantras, meditation, rest, exercise, tidying up (no idea), gaming -- find the things that help you with your day to day and go slow. 

The best progress is gradual progress, small daily challenges and changes are the best ways to heal. I know it sounds cliche but ‘a journey of a thousand miles starts with just one step’ is so unbelievably true. 

There are a bunch of articles and tips that I think you’d might like to read, hope they help. I’d also really recommend you spoke to your doctor and if possible, explore options of CBT therapy - I know it has a high success rate for anxiety. Remember that anxiety doesn’t define you and is treatable. 

Hope this helps a little on your journey,

When we’re stressed it releases a hormone called Cortisone which is primarily responsible for our ‘flight or fight’ response to things. The problem is, we’re not designed to feel stress as much as we inevitably do in our modern society. We know that stress in the short term isn’t much fun and affects everything from your emotions, behaviour and short-term health. We also know that over long periods of time, it can seriously cause complications with your long-term health, so it’s super important we all have our own toolkits for dealing stress.

In a way, crying helps release some of the negative emotions building up inside, but there are also other things you could be doing in order to reduce your stress and prevent it from getting that bad you end up in tears (think we’ve all been there tbh).

Have you ever been doing something you’ve enjoyed that much you literally lose track of time? It actually has a scientific term - it’s called your ‘flow’. When you’re in your flow, the idea is your mind can’t focus on anything other than the thing you’re doing that makes you so happy. We all have different things that help us find our flow - some people work out, game, design, build things, draw, honestly there’s an unlimited amount of things you could try. Find the thing that makes you feel the flow and make sure you’re building in time to do it - even if it’s half an hour a day, give yourself the space to do it and turn off all distractions.

Active exercise, like running, swimming and boxing are also amazing ways of reducing the cortisol pumping around your body and subsequently squashing down your stress. Exercise also releases feel good hormones. 

I find that when I’m stressed, writing good old lists always helps. Also for some reason, I’ll just have an overwhelming desire to tidy my room and sort out my cupboards. Different things work for different people.

If you want to learn more about stress, mental health and dealing with your emotions, chapter 4 in FEARLESS is your MVP. 

Hope this helps,

Yes to all of those things. Even though I just turned 29 and edging closer to my 30′s, I still don’t feel like an adult - I’m not sure you ever really do. We all worry but you can never let it rule your life - worrying just makes it happen twice. Easier said than done sometimes, but you’re not alone.