assthrax

Everybody in the club Yield to my will

they used to make smackable technology. you used to be able to hit your tv when it didn't work good.

It just shifted to spanking your puppy’s ass, to make them take that thick knot. Like the good little play thing they are.

i don't really think it's like that at all

video game with a flaccid -> boner meter in the ui but the whole game it never changes at all and nothing makes the boner meter go up so youre jusg aware of the protags flaccid penis the whole time for no good reason

I love thinking about “lost episode” creepypastas from a production pipeline POV. I wanna be the guy who gets handed a script about a main character brutally dying with no actual plot and is like “Yeah sure. Greenlighted.”

it's amazing how an otherwise gorgeous and beautiful outfit can be absolutely destroyed by a woodchipper

star wars is so fucking stupid. yoda can't just have a walking stick he Has to have a magic wookiee painkiller gimer stick full of nutritious juices. ?

I'm still thinking about the guy who saw me realize my wheelchair wouldn't fit in the elevator because he (also a wheelchair user) was already inside it and immediately quipped, "This elevator ain't accessible enough for the both of us."