Letters I Sent

Dear Sen. Enzi,

Dear Speaker Vos,

Thank you for all that you've done to stop Governor Evers's efforts to alter election day in response to Covid -- expanding absentee balloting, extending the deadline for absentee returns, and outright delaying the election.  As you know, the more that Wisconsinites are able to participate on this election, the less likely it is that we'll retain an important seat on the Supreme Court.

The way I look at it, we win either way.  First, turnout is depressed enough in densely populated areas (more likely to be Democrat Party strongholds!) because they don't want to risk infection, and we retain the Supreme Court seat.  Or, they turn out heavily, they win the seat, and enough get infected and pass on that we are able to win elections for a decade or more!

That's grim I know, but I think if we're able to frame it that way to the public, we have a winning argument.  "Look, you can have your life or a Republican-led government."  A little long for a bumper sticker I guess but it would work well on a in a soundbite or an ad!

Dear Sen. Fischer,

Thank you for your leadership in Washington and representing Nebraska values.  I am writing with concerns about the future viability of the Republican Party given recent polling suggesting females are moving away from the party in great numbers -- I think I saw a poll suggesting the party is more than 30 points under water with them.

The stories were speculating if this is the beginning of a long-term swing, but if so, we need to start thinking about how to respond and what policies we can implement to help us succeed.  That is, to keep them from voting.  It will be harder than what we've done to keep blacks and other Democrat supports from voting though, because we at least have some plausible defenses for voter ID and other suppression techniques that we can pretend are the real reasons.

I'm having trouble coming up with policies that will keep women from the polls, though.  Maybe something like, anyone bleeding from an open wound or otherwise may not be allowed in a polling place?  We can just say it's for the health and safety of voters?  This won't impact most women, I guess something like 17-20% of voting-age women are menstruating at any given time, but that's a good chunk and a good start, no?

Dear Sen. Grassley,

I was pleased to see a day or two ago that you agreed with President Trump that the anti-Kavanaugh protestors were actors paid by George Soros to make it look like there was some kind of popular opposition to his nomination. 

I know in your position you have to walk a fine line, but I'm glad to have more insight into your feelings regarding the "Jewish Question," namely what to do with these "people" who are tearing America apart through their control of the media and banking.  I'm sure you agree that Jews are a greater threat than the blacks, since people like George Soros use their ill-gotten fortunes to try to buy their preferred policy outcomes.

Dear Sen. Cornyn,

Thank you for your support of President Trump and soon-to-be Justice Kavanaugh.  The stupid liberals are so mad right now and I'm sure you agree that it's hilarious.

My favorite part is thinking about how we defended President Trump when he fired former FBI Director Andrew McCabe days before retirement (haha!) for "lacking candor" in an interview with other FBI officials.  We pretended, like, "oh, lacking candor is a serious matter and Mr. McCabe's firing was totally justified."

I bet those stupid liberals thought we really meant that haha.  But here we are, Judge Kavanaugh didn't just lack cander but straight up lied to you to your face in your Committee!!  And does it matter??  Hell no, it doesn't, because we know a Justice Kavanaugh will support the President and Conservative policies just as strongly as we do.  Who cares if he lied to the Committee or what we said just months ago?  We certainly don't.  Doesn't matter. 

Dear Sen. Sasse,

Thank you for your support of Judge Kavanaugh.  I believe his placement on the Supreme Court is exactly what this Country needs, especially given how much the liberals have worked to oppose him. 

My son, who is no lily by any stretch, said he was a little concerned with how the Judge basically said he would oppose any liberal or Democrat that comes before him with the "what goes around comes around" comment.  I told him not to worry because with a Justice Kavanaugh, there'll be nothing holding us back from further voter ID laws. voter roll purges, and things that keep Democrats from voting.  With advancements on those fronts, combined with how effective our gerrymanders are, I told my son that there's nothing that the libtards will ever be able to do to stop our conservative agenda because they'll never have a majority in Congress or the Supreme Court ever again! 

Dear Senator Flake,

Haha, you almost got me!  

Thank you for backing down on your "real investigation" comments and for your support of Judge Kavanaugh.  I know you like to toy around with the idea of acting like a grown up or whatever, but jeez, you really had me going there when you said that the FBI investigation had better be a real investigation and not just a way to give cover for a Republican vote!  By all measures, that's exactly what the FBI did -- provide cover -- and you've announced your support for soon-to-be Justice Kavanaugh regardless.  You know, sometimes it's hard to tell when you'll follow through on what you say haha!

Dear Rep. Conaway,

As a strong Trump supporter, thank you for your role in hindering the FBI's investigation into President Trump's obstruction of justice and his campaign's work with Russia.

I am writing because I recently heard that Russia is still working to help our cause, and that they're looking for a repeat of 2016 in the 2018 elections -- that is, to help our candidates win. 

Dear Rep. Budd,

Thank you for your support of conservative values in Congress.

I am writing after a week of discussion about whether President Trump has the ability to pardon himself for crimes committed during his 2016 campaign, as president, and in his attempts to hinder the investigation of those crimes.  I am confident that Trump and your fellow House Republicans will make sure that he never in a position where he actually needs to pardon himself, but I am concerned that after his term ends in 2025, the truth of his actions will come out and he may actually be at risk.

I think the appropriate action is to allow former presidents to issue pardons after they're out of office.  Based on what we've seen so far, President Trump and his family will need it.  I know this is a major change to the constitution, but it may be more palatable to you and your colleagues if the new law were restricted to only current and future presidents -- we wouldn't want B. Hussein Obama or Bill Clinton to have this kind of power!  Bill would just use it to excuse his bitch wife for getting those brave men murdered in Benghazi (it's unbelievable she hasn't been arrested yet!), and Hussein Obama wasn't even a legal president!.

Dear Sen. Cruz,

Thank you for your support of President Trump and Attorney General Jeff Sessions' policy of separating children from their parents if they cross into the United States illegally.  However, after seeing that boarder crossings have actually increased since this great practice was put in place, I think we may need to do more.

As you know, these people are coming to the US because they're trying to escape extreme violence and gang activity in their home countries.  They see the US as more peaceful, a place where they're less likely to be killed or have a loved one kidnapped for ransom. 

What we need to do is make them associate the United States with fear and death too, a place just as bad as their home country.  Unfortunately, I don't think separating families gets the job done.  I don't know what could be worse than separating young, crying children from their crying parents for weeks or months -- I mean, that will probably create significant psychological issues in the child, and it's not like they'll have the money for therapy or anything!  Do we have to, like legalize summary executions by the Boarder Patrol and ICE?  We'd at least be able to defend it the same way, "well, if they don't want to be killed, don't try to cross the boarder!

Dear Sen. Enzi,

Thank you for your work representing Wyoming in Congress and supporting President Trump's agenda based on America's founding principles.

I am writing because I read earlier today that the voter registration rates among Americans under 25 are way up, and that people that age skew Democrat.  I am concerned that if they vote in November, we will lose our Congressional majorities because they don't support our conservative agenda yet.  

What should we do about this?  It seems like the most obvious action would be to raise the voting age so that these new registrants are ineligible to vote.  Can this be accomplished fast enough to be in effect by November?

Another option could be to make a law saying that no one can vote in the 2018 elections if they didn't vote in a previous election -- a classic "grandfather clause" type thing (it was effective at one time!!).  Same question, can this be done fast enough to keep these people from voting?

Dear Rep. Jordan,

Thank you for your role in pushing the FBI to reveal the source it had informing on the Trump campaign.  I was so pleased that Mr. Trump followed your lead by demanding the DOJ investigate the matter, and that the DOJ actually gave in to his demand.  

I know the liberal pansies are all in a tizzy over some kind of "independence of DOJ" bs, but I'm sure you are like me and thinking about what we can do with the President's new found ability to direct Justice Department actions.  Perhaps open an investigation into Jeff Bezos or other enemies of the conservative movement?  Open investigations into all the Democrat Party's 2020 hopefuls so we'll be able to say that the nominee "has been under investigation for two years!"

Dear Rep. Meadows,

Thank you for your efforts in forcing the FBI to reveal its source that informed on the 2016 Trump campaign in its investigation into the campaign's contacts with foreign governments. 

As you know, the way things are going with the Trump administration make it likely that there will be further wrongdoing that the FBI may investigate.  By forcing them to reveal this source within the campaign, it is now less likely that any other source will work with the FBI -- they won't be able to promise that the source will remain anonymous!

You are helping make it harder for the FBI to connect the dots on Trump's wrongdoing!     This is such a valuable tool for the administration and at the very least, it's clear we're going to need even more... let's say "help" in 2020.   The harder it is for the FBI to investigate, the better. 

Dear Rep. Nunes,

I am writing in support of your committee's efforts to get the country's intelligence community to withhold documents supposedly damaging to the country's national security in "service" of the committee's "oversight" of government operations.  We need to get them to finally say No to something so we can move to overhaul the Mueller "investigation" and finally shut down that threat to the Trump administration!  We can't let any more information get out about what he and the people around him have done!

We thought we had them with former FBI Director James Comey's memos, and like you, I was surprised when Deputy AG Rod Rosenstein actually released them! We were so ready to go with that impeachment resolution, and then he went and released them!  Did not see that coming!

Hopefully this new gambit to get him to reveal intelligence sources helping Mueller will be a line he won't to cross.  Please don't feel like it's something you shouldn't do follow through on because you once said you were outraged by the Obama administration's supposed unmasking of intelligence officials, or that Hillary Clinton was risking national security with her email practices.