Lesserworm

Naturally everybody will think it's fake because of the date only to lose their minds (both positively and negatively based on their opinion of trump) when realizing it's real

There will be massive celebrations in the streets and on social media and lots of predictable "don't speak ill of the dead" discourse about those celebrations

Weird evangelicals will pull some weird number trick talking about how Jesus was conceived on April 1st and that makes Trump a sort of messiah and people will make fun of that

The Republicans (after they're done with the faux-sadness and faux-outrage) will stomp over each other to be his successor but none of them will succeed. They'll tear each other apart and have no single nominee for the November elections.

There will be discourse about if Biden and the living former presidents should go to his funeral (they won't, he was a traitor insurrectionist)

The Ukraine-Russia War immediately goes in favor of Ukraine as morale in the Kremlin is reduced. China similarly backs off from its threats on Taiwan.

Ten thousand new memes are made, some sticking around for years to come.

(video and tweet source)

THE HANSHIN TIGERS HAVE BROKEN THE CURSE OF THE COLONEL!

For the people who don't know, in 1985, the Hanshin Tigers won their first (and at the time, only) Japan Series victory. Traditionally, they've been hard luck losers, and they're often compared to the Red Sox in the sense of their being overshadowed by the Yomiuri Giants, who, like the Yankees, have won more championships than any other team in their league.

When they won, fans resembling the players on the team were jumping into the Dotonbori Canal in Osaka - the fans would yell out a player's name, and a fan who looked like them would jump in. The problem was when they got to Randy Bass, who none of the Japanese fans looked like. They needed to find something resembling him and selected a statue of Colonel Sanders, who was white and had a beard like Bass, and threw it into the canal.

Colonel Sanders sank underwater, and the Hanshin Tigers did...horribly after that, usually coming in last in the league or close to it, to the point where the team was considered cursed by his presence in the canal. The team made the Japan Series a few times after that in the 2000s and once in the 2010s, but lost each time.

In 2009, the Colonel was located and recovered from the Dotonbori Canal, save for his left hand and his glasses. He's now at a location near Koshien Stadium, where the Tigers play their home games (and where the famed national high school baseball championships are played), and can be viewed there to this day.

Fans were, however, not convinced that they had earned the Colonel's forgiveness, since his hand and glasses were missing. In the image above, he's been given some replacement glasses, but he still lacks a left hand.

This year, Hanshin beat the Orix Buffaloes, a team that plays roughly 20 minutes away by train in Nishinomiya, 4-3 in a seven-game series. The curse is thus considered broken...so the fans did what they do best, and threw a fan dressed like Colonel Sanders into the Dotonbori Canal.

What Batman’s fans actually want: