put me in the time loop

Having fun by doing chores and listening to podcasts…. Now this is the Life!

Imagine being a barber and tuning into your weird ass town’s radio for the news or the weather only to hear the radio host doxxing you for giving his crush a haircut

[image description: a meme showing spongebob screaming to a disconcerted crowd, with the original caption edited. the text reads "i fucking love incomprehensible media. i want to finish the thing and not understand a single thing that happened" /end ID]

As a scientist I find the concept of Cecil freely yapping about Carlos on the radio so funny because if I was in the lab just going about my experiments and then some person on the radio started talking about how hot I am I would get clowned on it by my coworkers beyond belief. Every time I walked into the lab the grad students there would’ve been like “there he is with his perfect hair 😩” and if the centrifuge broke “try asking it to work with your sweet caramel voice 😫” like deadass the lab would be insufferable for months

sometimes being a fan of something means not wanting them to make any more of it

i would like a hug…. JUST KIDDING! i would like TWO hugs. (suddenly becomes cold and standoffish) i don’t need anything or anyone and i don’t want to talk about it.

duuuuuude you have GOT to come out tonight we're enacting cruelty upon those who have transgressed so badly that we can justify any act against them... and you KNOW we're interpreting our delight as moral righteousness... Yeah it's fucking crazyyyyyyy get an Uber

it takes a truly sick mind to fantasize about two real people being friends with each other #DarkRPF

there are places in the world today that are experiencing 40°C for the first time in recorded history. of course there's no way to know whether chucking billionaires into volcanos will appease the sun god but i feel we're doing the scientific method a disservice if we don't at least try

give it up for girls with vaginas and boys with penises

pause i forgot cis people exist this was intended as a celebration of bottom surgery

the dutch bike helmet discourse is still so funny. scores of indignant dutch people going on about how they dont need to wear helmets because everybody is used to bike based stuff and knows how to handle themselves, periodically interjected by people who work in emergency rooms in the netherlands talking about how many cases of bike fall related head trauma they see regularly.

proposing a new genre of fiction called an anti-romance where u r presented w a couple at the start & the story is about their emotional journey towards a catastrophic break up

will they won't they (end this farce). there's only one bed (but for some reason they don't really want to share it). out of context eavesdropping (that paints the relationship in a better light than it deserves). chasing after them to stop them getting on that plane (and stopping them from finally being free)

nobody understands my vision i don't mean any old story where a relationship fails and it's tragic or w/e i mean a story where the intention is for the audience to root for it failing the same way u root for it succeeding in a romance. & when the relationship finally implodes at the climax of the story it's all very cathartic & everybody cheers.

like have u never wanted a fictional couple to break up so badly it hurt?