SOMNUS

I’m never on here anymore and honestly it’s only helped solidify my satisfaction with life as of late. I can focus on things that really matter to me that I never found the time or energy to do before. I even have 5 plants in my room that I’ve been keeping alive the past 3 months (which is a huge accomplishment since i could never keep anything alive before), I have more drive to do things because I’m not secluding myself and letting my mental illness (depression) take control of me. I’m actively helping my family around the house and learning new life skills on a near daily basis. I make sure to get out of the house and see friends once a week or so, I’m getting my drivers license, being promoted to a Supervisor, legal changes done with, plan to apply for the next school year and working out nearly every day, on top of daily responsibilities like chores that just come with being an adult. I’m doing more for myself than I ever have before and I thank my friends, family AND myself for getting me this far, self improvement can be addictive in some ways. :) 

Sometimes it takes experiencing something bad in order to realize how lucky you had it before, that alone can be enough to change your outlook on things and take more time to appreciate the people that truly matter. Not every day is perfect but I feel like I’ve conquered some big obstacles in my life and despite the fact there will always be those bumps along the road, thats all they are in the end, and it doesnt matter because I know I’m heading in a good direction. 

As much as I wish I never wouldve made certain life choices in the past, because I can clearly remember how hard they were to survive, those choices are what have gotten me here to this day, in this moment. Those choices are what helped me grow as a person and improve myself exponential amounts from who I had been beforehand. I have the drive to do better after experiencing the bad.