Scars and Flowers

//I feel like once I went on hiatus back a few months ago when my life was falling apart, the little bit of people that knew of the existence of my OC Noel moved on. I don’t know--maybe I’m wrong to say that; I saw the new movie and was really not as into it because I’ve fallen away from the fandom so much during the hiatus. I’m no longer in the loop I guess and it bums me out because I loved being a part of something amazing that made me laugh and smile. 

I am currently debating deleting this blog all together to be blunt. A lot of people on my main TMNT blog (theturtlewithoutashell) did not take kindly to Noel since OCs are such a fucking issue in this fandom. I am ashamed of even creating her sometimes, which makes me feel like I was a mistake as a person since I relate so heavily to her inner turmoils--much like how I relate a lot to Raphael before I made her.

Noel was made out of pain and my ugliest illnesses, and for people to berate her as a character attacked me--and attacked my illnesses. I poured a lot of my issues onto her character, which was a way I was using to cope with real issues in my life that were trying to suffocate me. She is me in a sense, just me put into a fictional, mutant body. She’s a bit rough around the edges, but she’s just got a lot of walls up that can be taken down with some compassion from others. 

I was so excited to get her interacting with our turtle brothers, but I’ve been laughed at by quite a few canon blogs due to being a female OC...because all TMNT OC blogs want is smut and romance apparently..

She’s my baby, and she will always stay in my art archives if I walk away from this blog. I guess it’s best to keep original characters in the TMNT fandom to yourself and don’t say shit. I dunno.

//sup?

School almost landed me in the hospital this semester and I was taking care of my neglected emotions during that time. I know I will be done with classes around April 26th. This will give me more time to be on this blog and get back into the swing of Noel’s character!

Thank you all again for those that have stuck around. I really do appreciate it.

Thank you for sticking around.