Lazy Bitch

my favorite road sign is “falling rocks” like what am I supposed to do with that. what could I possibly do to avoid falling rocks while driving 70 miles per hour through an Appalachian ravine.

small brain “hotel california is about drugs” normal brain “hotel california is about the music industry” giant brain “hotel california is meant to be taken completely literally and The Eagles are still trapped there”

galaxy brain “hotel california is a negative yelp review with a 2 minute guitar solo”

"please advise" is the professional email equivalent of "girl help"

The most embarrassing thing In my life is whenever I see people and they ask what I’ve been up to . Literally nothing ever . Im like ohh you know this and that …. The usual ..

Not socialist in a “I won’t have to work” type of way but socialist in a “I’ll still be working but I won’t be worried I won’t make the rent” type of way. In a “billions won’t be hoarded by one person” type of way. In a “janitors, fast-food workers, child care workers, preschool teachers, hotel clerks, personal care and home health aides, and grocery store cashiers, will live comfortably” type of way. In a “the sick and elderly will be cared for” type of way. In a “no child should work” type of way.

In a “disabled people live comfortably even and especially if they can’t work” type of way.

In a "no one has to work themselves to the bone for bare survival" kind of way