lain's brain

Did that person subtweet you? Was that Instagram story a little too on the nose with a situation you've had with a friend? Surely that person meant this in their message and not something else?

Reading between the lines. We've all done it, even me!

I used to think I was a detective, constantly scanning through each message, each story, each tweet, even through in-person conversation, hoping to get a clue or even the "true answer" to what a person was saying. I'm pretty sure that meme they just posted now was about the situation we had last week.

Yikes! I used to do it a lot too, and by then, it has caused misunderstanding after misunderstanding. It has even caused some of my friendships to split after feeling incredibly anxious about a message! (Maybe you think this post is about you?)

So what do we do? We know we are curious and anxious beings, wondering why the other person isn't honest about what they are saying. "If they are annoyed/upset with me, they can just DM me and we can straighten it out!"

And that thought is correct. BUT! In saying that, not everyone will be able to have the capacity to do so. Again, under the assumption that the message they're making is about YOU.

Should a person be upset or annoyed or angry or anything, it should be up to them to confront you about it, to sort it out. But if not, it's best to chalk it up to two things: 1) The message isn't about you. 2) The message IS about you, and they are a coward for not reaching out to you and sorting it out like an adult. And now? Rest your brain. Reading between the lines will always set you up for failure. Log off or restrict your social media time if you need to. And focus on the person that matters most: YOU!

I wasn't necessarily influenced by the recent movement of going semi-analog. I am however, very interested in how people are progressing to "dumb" their phones, to reduce the connection they have with the online world.

I got myself a dumb phone in this instance because I was honestly fed up with my iPhone breaking and shattering for the third time in a month. I figured I'm too clumsy for a smartphone and ended up going back to basics. I only really use my phone to look at instagram anyway, which I can do when I get home from a long day at work.

It's been really fun so far just having messages and calls from the people that matter most to me. Social media is still very much something I need to rely on for promotion and archive purposes, but otherwise it has been very refreshing not looking at it all the time.

In search of the things that matter...

Last year around this time, a friend offered to help me recover photos from my old Nokia E63. At this time, I was all about archiving - desperately recovering anything I can find that I can truly claim as MINE. A house fire, many stolen/lost/corrupt hard drives/flash drives, and just sheer clumsiness have now resulted in a very weak archive of my life.

I look at what was the remnants of my "bedroom". I place it in air quotes as it was just a little bed crammed behind my parent's room, with only a curtain between us for my "privacy". In this I was experimenting with a lot of things. I rolled and spray painted the walls with stencils I made. I used wall decals possibly bought from Typo (the most "indie" shop you could find in Sydney at the time), and had an instax wall. It was as "Tumblr" as you could get. I can even see remnants of Purikura photos taken with friends back in high school (rest in peace to Capitol Square for taking them down after 10+ years of running).

This photo is a bit of a nothing photo, but to me, this is archive. This is what my life was literally like about 16 years ago. And I think thinking of it now... I'm still this person back in high school. Still experimenting to see what looks good. Taking more risks now with the same skinny wrists. But it's great.

And that's what matters.

Love,

"Everyone's making a zine these days!" (As written on my 2026 prediction bingo.)

Everyone's making a zine, a blog (hi, everyone!), starting a new account, working on something, etc. And I think that's a good thing. It's important to not only keep ourselves productive (rest is productive, too!) but also to channel in something we have always had inside of us.

I have always been a person of many words. There is always something in my brain that I just need to put out there into the world!

For the longest time, I was in hiding. Mostly out of anxiety, but also from fear of what other people would think of me when they see what I post, or whatever I showcase in public. And I think for once, I want to let that fear go.

I've done it on numerous occasions before -- streaming, tweeting, even having a tumblr "blog" here (if you know, you know), but I think it's time I finally start fresh and have myself, once again, back in the public space.

With the resurgence of things going analog or at least back to 2016, and inspired by a video by @mothcub, I now present this blog. Ideally I would like to use it for thoughts I just have in my brain, as it can be quite random, but also use it as a media log to strengthen my skills in reviewing and forming opinions as a media enjoyer.

With that being said, thanks for reading this far and hope you enjoy the show!

Love,