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3 cookies deep and it all starts to make sense

Cup of milk and i start moving like neo

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chips1977

Went to the pawn shop to get my ant farm back snd they put different ants in it

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rockdistributor100

I Was So Good And Polite They Are Putting Me In The Touch Tank At Aquarium Tomorrow.

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easel-eisel

are you mad that the villain identified me as the most impactful party member to mind control

fruitsoftheape100

Welcome To The Penthouse Suite Of My Secxual Spire

blemgoid

my shift lead says im not allowed to do stealth takedowns on the clock anymore

bpdvibess

me (an adult): yeah I’m thinking about running away

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show me the law that says crime is illegal judge

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alandrosul

women in stem. women in root. women in leaf.

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lakevida

give me another amulet im not driving

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the new viral trend is swimming in the river with an abdominal wound! take an #AbdominalWoundRiverSwim and post your results

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wariofan63

Therapist: Donkey Kong will not briskly walk diagonally into your house. That’s just not a realistic thought.

Donkey Kong:

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Mutuals let me smell you with my antennas

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