grieving for my younger self right now, one direction was my whole life

if i look back, i am lost
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ellievsbear
The Stonewall Inn
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I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

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YOU ARE THE REASON
Xuebing Du
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@kittemily
grieving for my younger self right now, one direction was my whole life

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The indifferent universe holds me like a baby nonetheless
every once in a while i think about
the only time ive ever felt loved was when i was eating a red berry parfait and walking to the library but a girl ran smack into me getting us both covered in berries then she grabbed my hand and said “ill never be sorry enough, but you look so beautiful” and she ran away and i just have to live w this empty hole where my heart lay
in that moment i really was ready to do any thing if she had held onto my hand and ran in to traffic i wouldve followed like a lost puppy smeared in red sugar entranced as persephone was to the pomegranate i wouldve died right there with out a second thought and i couldnt even fault her for beguiling me so, in that moment, love was so easy ; it was blameless.
crush by richard siken // richard diebenkorn // richard diebenkorn // if there’s a way out i’ll take it by lora mathis
If you are beginning your semester of school this upcoming week or sometime soon; I am wishing that you transition smoothly into your academic environment. I hope that you develop comfortable relationships with your professors and instructors. I pray any financial burdens that have arisen be resolved timely and easily.

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Catherine Gildiner, Good Morning, Monster: Five Heroic Journeys to Emotional Recovery
richard siken my beloved
— dissociation
the book of disquiet by fernando pessoa // a breath of life by clarice lispector // againts the mass of the night by kaye donachie // how to dissapear completely by radiohead // normal people by sally rooney // rené magritte // virgina woolf // by me // enrico robusti
Friends to lovers + “we could’ve been doing that the whole time?” = chefs kiss
— Banana Yoshimoto, Kitchen
[text ID: Maybe someday I'd be able to think it over calmly, in a brighter place than this, full of sunlight and flowers. But by then it would be too late.]

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Archilochos translated by Anne Carson, in “Eros the Bittersweet”
— Letters to Véra, Vladimir Nabokov
[text ID: You came into my life—not as one comes to visit (you know, “not taking one’s hat off”) but as one comes to a kingdom where all the rivers have been waiting for your reflection, all the roads, for your steps.]
kind of want to be taken to a cool museum by someone who's obsessed with art. just want to let them lead me around by hand & fall in love with them as they excitedly explain and educate me about what they love the most.
- Mahmoud Darwish from 'Memory for Forgetfulness: August, Beirut c. 1982 (tr. Ibrahim Muhawi)
— Anaïs Nin, The Diary of Anaïs Nin: Vol. 1 (1931-1934)
[text ID: I postpone death by living, by suffering, by error, by risking, by giving, by losing.]

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i wish to be more poetic, more romantic, more classy yet i stumble around like a thirteen year old boy with no sense of direction
-William Wordsworth