Secretly not a bird

More fun facts about ancient Celtic marriage laws: There were no laws against interclass or interracial marriage, no laws against open homosexual relationships (although they weren’t considered ‘marriages’ since the definition of a marriage was ‘couple with child’), no requirement for women to take their husband’s names or give up their property, but comedians couldn’t get married

It’s Adam and Eve not Adam Sandler and Eve

I want to expound upon “comedians couldn’t get married” thing because it’s actually really interesting. Satire was respected in Ancient Ireland. It was thought to have great power, enough to physically maim the subject one was making jokes about. Satirists could bring down kings with a witty enough insult. That was actually their original function. When the king didn’t do right by his people, a bard was supposed to compose a poem so scathing it would raise welts on the king’s skin to oust him (it was illegal for a “blemished” king to rule.) Unwarranted satire was considered a form of assault. So what it boils down to is ancient Celts being like “These people are too dangerous to reproduce. DO NOT TRUST THEM WITH CHILDREN. EVER.”

whats a king to a bard

Thats literally a dnd skill

#have you ever been so annoying you caused the reinvention of an entire literary genre

Hoooooolyyyyyyyy shiiiiiiiiit

well, well, well, if it isn’t the feelings i’ve been trying to avoid