heavy is the head

Okay, phew! I mean, I totes would have never said that to your dad, but he wasn’t the tourney captain while I was the head cheerleader, or in my classes since I was a little girl. Way diff. I’ll just like assume the ‘and chill’ part, but we don’t need to talk about that part of things. ROAR is so fun to watch, though; I’m like super into watching it, I even thought about trying out for it but I’ll like, let Mulan’s daughter have her only girl thing in that, just like Gracie had the only girl thing on tourney for ages. Maybe we’ll start with like, friends just skating in a straight line; I mean, would it be weird if I went and did that with Mason and Cassie? Ice skating is kind of datey but I can so do my own thing. Totally, although one seems like an antihero at first kind of until you get to know them, I guess? You have to see the show and see but most of the cheerleaders could easily be genderswapped if more boys try out.

I can’t even imagine what my dads reaction to hearing that would be, so that’s probably for the best; you and I are always going to be the same age and be schoolmates, though, which I certainly hope changes the way people look at me versus the way they look at him. It’s crazy to think the next generation is going to look at me like that...but I digress, my apologies. ROAR is highly fun to watch, yes! I’m sure Lydia wouldn’t mind if you tried out but it’s very kind of you to let her have her sport, Head Cheerleader. I...don’t think it’d be weird, no? Blake and I never mind when our friends join in on activities, and ice skating doesn’t have to be datey if the situation is right; besides, Mason and Cassie are two of the most agreeable people on the planet, but you know this. Antiheroes are fascinating, I’m glad there’s such variety! It sounds like you’ve really thought this through, Madison, I’m so happy for you!

If only forgetting were as easy for me! Maybe. Is this what it feels like to be a real girl for a change? To like, have all kinds of crazy theories about why this is such a big deal to her? Maybe living with Persephone is finally starting to rub off on me. Maybe Kelsey and Leo are actually just that cool and it’s not them trying to hide? Although I don’t know, I personally don’t get why Olly would want to be friends with the guy who was trying to ruin his relationship. Friends close, enemies closer? Ugh, I feel like I don’t even get what’s going on in my own cousin’s brain anymore, this is so weird. Why do people love high school drama so much? I hate this. How come you guys get a name and we don’t? We could be Pemma or Emsephone or something, otherwise you guys seem more important. Don’t let Persephone hear you call her the mom friend, though, oh my Beast. It’s kind of true, but still! I don’t want it to hurt her feelings. And I love you guys, you know that? I just never meant to cause so much trouble.

You haven’t seen THAT much, if you look at the ratio of what you know and what’s transpired, if that provides you comfort... I would have no idea what being a “real girl” is like, but my brain provides me with crazy theories too, always, so it sounds more like you’re finally giving into the drama bug just a little bit. It might have to do with the fact that you feel like you know your cousin less, when previously he was your number one - it’s a disorienting feeling and stress makes falling into overthinking and theorizing much easier. Perhaps a heart to heart with Oliver or some cousin-bro-date would help? I have no clue, I’m sorry. It’s a couple name, Emma! Will plus Blake equals Wake! If you’d prefer to be called Pemma or Emsephone let me know and I’ll do so, but it may lead to people who aren’t me getting the wrong impression, you should be warned. I called myself the dad friend in the same breath, it was hardly meant with offense! I quite like her being the mom friend, actually; it makes me feel so much less old, but I can keep it hush around her. I love you too. It wasn’t just you, it was a whole situation. And we’re so young, I’m sure this is the first of numerous altercations we’ll have, as awful as that sounds. We have a whole life left together, though. Or at least I’d like us to.

It’s cool, I’m gonna chalk it up to you being really crazy that day – and ignore the part where maybe it’s good that the boring stuff you’ve got to do for the rest of your life doesn’t make you wanna die. Yeah, but me and dad together? We’re like, a swirling vortex of doom sometimes, especially hwen I’m off school for the summer. Promposals, huh? Can’t possibly imagine what you’d want to know that for, but dude, you know I love making a scene.

Was that a silver lining about me being productive? That I just heard from your mouth? Beast, I love you so much; it’ll be nice to never want to die, but you were stuck with me forever anyway so I doubt that would’ve been much of a concern, even at your vortex of doomiest. Jane is a saint for dealing with you two, goodness; I can’t imagine having a husband AND a child like you without losing all my hair. Right? Promposals are a totally random thing to bring up with one’s significant other before prom. Also, hypothetically, if I don’t show up to lunch on some day, just assume I’m on my way and wait in the cafeteria for me, please? Thank you for taking in my not at all suspicious request.

You could always… ask first? Alert them that you have to clear up some space for your new regime and ask for their preferences on whether they’d stay, or if there’s somewhere in particular they’d like to go? One time I went particularly crazy and ordered them in a rainbow, but then changed it back the very next day, that was a terrible system. Right now I have a shelf of classic literature and mythology and philosophy, separate from my young adult fiction shelf, and so on and so forth.  It wasn’t a conscious effort to replace you, you know. I just… was excited to meet new people, to learn from someone who’s so different than us. And I know I handled things badly with Leo at first, don’t you think I still beat myself up for that every day for hurting Oliver, even unintentionally, even just a little bit? But now they seem to be getting along and it’s just better. Not better than being friends with you guys, but the situation, getting to know them so that they’re not a threat? That’s been really good. I want to go with you guys, I do, but I also want prom to be really special and what if she decides in the middle of it that I’m still not good enough for her cousin and I just fall apart on prom night? And if we don’t encourage Kelsey and Leo to go they might not go at all, I don’t want the VKs to all be sitting at home on a night that’s supposed to be fun for all Auradon Prep students, you know? I mean, would it make you feel better if we tried to have a game night this week? Before I make any decisions about prom? Because I want to be your friend, I’ll always want to, of course. I just feel like a fish out of water right now, I suppose.

...Did you know that the notion of asking is almost always the first thing I forget? It sounds so obvious when you say it though, so thank you so much for being a sounding board/voice of reason/friend! I feel so foolish. While a fan of rainbows, personally, I can’t imagine that’s a very constructive book order at all! Genre seems by far to be the most effective, but perhaps there’s something else we haven’t discovered yet. Oh, as for philosophy books, though, there’s quite more than a few in the royal library that I recommend checking out; it’s been a bulk of the reading I do as the new king, and it’s actually quite fascinating? I know it wasn’t. I know, but it felt...not great to watch. I was jealous, I suppose, and I’m very sorry for that because of course you can have as many friends as you like, and I can’t imagine who wouldn’t want to befriend you. And I’m glad it feels so much less threatenign with the Leo/Oliver/you situation now.. the only times I messed up badly with Blake were solely on my shoulders and I wish I had someone else involved to get to know and feel like I could smooth it over and stop feeling randomly guilty, so I understand. Emma isn’t going to just flip out on you! And if you agree to go to prom with us and Oliver, she’ll probably greatly appreciate that you’re all involved in something and not being decisive, and I just.... think that having a game night this week is a really sound idea. Brilliant, really. We should definitely do that, if you’d be up for it! I’m so certain that after that you’ll realize that the ocean wants you in it just as much as it did before and you can come back in the water any time.

Layoffs definitely seem harsh, you’re right! You could always secure jobs for them in other castles and redistribute them? Just tell them they’re great workers but Auradon City feels a bit crowded? Tidying up is good for anxiety, you’ve got a good point there – usually I just reorder the books on my bookshelf when I’m having a bad day, though, I can never decide which organizational system I want to use for very long. I never want you to experience that either, I hope you know that. I don’t think she has a date? Although maybe she and Leo could come along and go together as friends or something, since we’ve been spending a lot of time with the both of them? But I understand if that’s too much of an imposition on you guys, the four of you deserve to have fun with or without us. Or I mean, if Olly wanted he could go with you guys instead too and I could meet him at the dance, whatever makes everyone happiest.

There’s an idea; I feel a little guilty even doing that though, which is ridiculous, I know, and as King I should have more of a backbone, but I suppose I think that once people are used to something they’d rather keep it that something as long as possible. Nonetheless, it’s a great idea, Princess Becca, and I’ll keep it in mind should I need to think the staff. Reordering books is great for the anxiety! I usually go by genre and then by alphabetical order, author’s last name of course, but there’s so many great systems you can go by; what are your books currently styled in? Honestly? I can’t speak for everyone but what would make me, personally, the happiest is going to prom with my five best friends. And I really don’t see why we shouldn’t? It’s not like Emma’s mad at you for anything Oliver related anymore, Emma and you ultimately both just want Oliver to be happy, and you two have gotten along before that, and besides, hiding from us replacing us just sad for us. Like we were just disposable friends to you,  and meanwhile we’re holding our hearts and spots open for you....or maybe it’s just me. It could just be me, since I’m sure Blake and Emma probably would be good with you two coming back but don’t think about it as much and it’s hard to tell what Persephone actually cares about, but I adore you, and Oliver. And I miss how it was with the six of us. And if you have no interest in going back to how it was ever or trying to move towards a similar future, I’d prefer to know sooner rather than later. I”ll be your friend, one on one, regardless, and no one hates each other so it’s not like anyone would be forbidden from speaking or anything dramatic but it would be better for me and my brain to know if there’s a chance or if I’m giving metaphorical mouth-to-mouth to a nonbreathing entity. I apologize if that’s too forward or too personal, but there you go.

Dude, you’re stuck with me, I’m not gonna let you be boring or bored, just deal with it. Uh… nope, I’m gonna pretend that I didn’t hear that. Or that I was giving you a blowjob under the table while you were filling out the forms and that’s why it was exciting. Sign me the fuck up, man, I bet Tarzan and Jane will be relieved to have me out of the house for a few weeks so that they don’t have to stress about the risk of someone breaking mom’s good china.

You can’t pretend you didn’t hear that, what if it’s a sign? A sign that I’m a lost cause to the boring side and neither you nor the best blowjob in the world can keep me sane? Not to scare you off or anything, because you’re stuck with me regardless, but I thought you deserved a warning. As if your dad randomly accidentally breaking some of the china isn’t always a risk, but I’m glad! I miss them - I’m going to pop by some time and surprise them for a visit. OH and speaking of surprises - insert causal and completely normal segue here - what’s your stance on promposals?

Go no further than that, I know enough. Viney I can definitely do, don’t worry. I’m way more into making everyone flower arrangements for prom than I am into prom, this is actually kind of fun. I don’t know, apparently when someone’s annoyed at someone else the person who did the annoying thing just runs away. Maybe she only hung out with us long enough to get Olly to fall for her and now that she has him, she wants cooler friends or something, I don’t know. Still freaked out by dream boy? I thought it was cool once you talked to Blake about it, though! I don’t know, what happens if none of that stuff works? Are you guys all going to be disappointed in me for ruining the Game Night 6 forever?

That was a barely veiled attempt at innuendo, my apologies. I forget you’re already privy to too much information about what goes on there. I’m glad you’re having fun with it! See?! There’s something in the prom experience for everyone! It’s called fight or flight, I suppose she just felt like running? I can’t quite say I think she only hung out with for Oliver’s sake, and I flatter myself in thinking there are no cooler friends than us, but your guess is as good as mine. What, no, I don’t know - telling Blake made that part much better, but I don’t know, having Leo and Kelsey along would feel like a very clear buffer in my opinion and if we have that, why bother pretending we’re all going together at all? If none of that stuff works? I know I’d occasionally wonder how things otherwise might have been different, but you didn’t ruin anything and I wouldn’t think of it like that, ever. Besides, Oliver is your cousin, you’ll never lose him completely. Blood is thicker than water. And moreover, Wake and Emma and Persephone were kind of the original four anyway. We’re good like this, too - my one true love, my best girl, and the mom friend to my dad friend. That’s all I need. I hope it’s a good enough little group for you, too.

Really? I mean, if you guys like, Bring It On and chilled maybe Blake would be into it? Sorry, is that like inappropro to say to the King of the kingdom, though? I don’t know, like ice skating seems super hard but I’m in great shape? It just depends if I had to like, unlearn cheerleading skills to be able to do it, I’m kind of old for somebody just starting, you know? I should like hang out in Arendelle more and learn just how to go in straight lines first before I start thinking about flips and twists and stuff. Oh, really? A literary mag sounds totally cool, I wish I had time to work on that too but I’m sure you remember that being a captain of a year round team keeps you busy busy busy. Totally! Any of the head cheerleaders, really, even if I get left behind at the other school and turn out to be a total backstabbing biatch.

It’s a little inappropriate to say to the King of the kingdom, but I also happen to be Will, your classmate who’s totally fine with you alluding to the sex I could potentially have with my committed boyfriend - and it’s definitely worth a suggestion to him, I’ll let you know. If we watch the movie, I mean, not necessarily about the “and chill” part. Oh, I know what you mean - growing up I really liked playing ROAR and thought it would help with tourney, but the throws are completely different. It was an unlearning process, which sucked, but ultimately I think made me stronger in tourney than I would’ve been if I were coasting. Arendelle and their ice rinks are always open, though; if you end up becoming a prized figure skater as well as a head cheerleader, I think you may just take the cake as far as athletes at this school, though, most only do one sport at most. Yes, no, absolutely, being in charge takes a lot of time - I’m already curious how you’ll balance cheer and the musical at once but I have total confidence in you. So there’s more than one protagonist in Bring it On? That’s nice - a few people can all feel like the stars. It’s a mainly female cast, too, right?

Do you do anything like that in Auradon City? I mean, you must have more servants in the castle than the rest of us combined, but you’re also the most responsible person I know and I could see you wanting to take care of your own affairs. Especially because Merlin knows what kind of things Blake leaves behind in your room! Do the servants ever give you funny looks after they’ve cleaned things up? No, no, you’re absolutely right, people should always try to make time for their friends, lest they lose them and well — losing friends is never a very good feeling, I’m sure. Oh, um, surprisingly I haven’t put all that much thought into planning what happens before or during prom, actually; if Oliver would like to do that, though, then of course I’d be up for it. Emma’s his best friend, I’d hate to accidentally separate him from her. I had thought about maybe doing something involving Kelsey, but I hadn’t actually asked her about any specifics.

Actually, though we do have plenty of servants (almost too many, if you ask me, but lay-offs seem even more harsh so my mind isn’t made up), I’ve taken to cleaning my room from a very young age. They still go in now and then and tidy up but for the most part? I like having it nice and neat for them, especially given who my near-constant companion is - I like to avoid those funny looks if at all possible, and besides, tidying up is good for the anxiety. Losing friends is one of the worst kinds of losses. I never want to experience that. I was thinking just a Game Night kind of thing, but if you wanted to invite Kelsey and whoever her date is if she has one, that could be neat. We like being amicable with the villain kids, and if it means more time with you, it’s even more worth it.

Your funnest days aren’t behind you, you just gotta figure out how to have a different kind of fun. Oh yeah, I’ve watched you grow lots but you’re not like a grandpa, I can still find ways to get you to be more exciting than you think you are. I’ve been doing it since we were five. A whole month? Daaaamn, I feel like it should be the month before we go back to school, but I don’t know. It’s you and it’s me, there’s no going wrong with that combo.

Thanks for not giving up on me, love, even if you might be sooorely mistaken. The other day I had fun filling out forms. I had fun filling out forms! Clearly it’s my brain getting used to being senile! But if anyone can get me back into chec, it’s you. A whole month! I think it’s totally doable, and we’re more than ripe for another like wake-cation. 

Yeah, I guess boutonnieres are what I mean! Those are the ones for boys, right? Well, you’re the king, you could always order him to wear a flower if you wanted, but he’d probably just get revenge on you somehow later. I can help you design one that looks vine-y so he likes it better? Or is that weird? Uh huh, talking, we’ve all seen how much you love talking at game night. I did forgive her! Or I would have, if she hadn’t gone and made a big deal out of nothing. People are allowed to be annoyed when someone hurts their best friend, aren’t they? If someone upset Blake a lot you wouldn’t just instantly get over it while he was still sad, would you? I doubt it’ll ever go back to normal, now — even if they came back I bet they’d want to bring Leo and Kelsey now, and that’s not six, that’s eight. Which doesn’t bug me, but I don’t know… Didn’t we all learn this year that sometimes stuff changes and it’s not always a bad thing? I can try to talk to Becca, I guess, but I’m not sure it’ll get through to her. And I’m not good at talking! Do you think if I sent her a plant she’d come?

Yes, Emma my dear, those are the ones for boys. I’m not much for ordering Blake around except for in very very specific situations, of which this one doesn’t qualify. I like him being himself anyway more than I like him stuffing himself into the most formal suit he can find for me, but if we can present him a viney option? That’d be most genial, Emma, thank you! It’s not weird at all! Ssshhh, lest the kingdom think their king is a heathen. People are completely allowed to be annoyed, but we can be annoyed with friends and still keep them as our friends, yes? Friends get bugged or peeved at each other all the time, it’s totally normal! I...yeah, no, I don’t like the idea of change, especially not if it includes Leo; I quite liked our six. And it would mean a lot to me if you could see if it was repairable. And if it isn’t, that’s...that’ll be okay, too. We’re humans, the creatures of adaptibility, and so long as I have you and Blake and Persephone, I’ll be more than content. Sending a plant could work! She knows that’s how you talk! Or you could send Persephone with a message, or Oliver - use your common links.

There was only one that was in theaters and the rest were straight to video but like, what great videos they were! Every one was koala tea, you should have a marathon with Blake! You do, though; did you see her in Nashville or Heroes or Ice Princess? Ice Princess is personally my fave, I love female athlete things — it’s almost as pretty and intense as cheerleading. And probs more rare, I’m not too intimidated to admit that! You could like, do backstage stuff, that doesn’t take nearly as much time as acting rehearsals, I bet. And then you could brag about being like a super duper well-rounded king who’s showing an interest in the arts, people care about those, you know. No, no, there are totes other roles besides just cheerleaders! And some roles with cheerleaders where you don’t have to actually cheer very often, like the people from her old school.

Maybe we will! I’ll suggest it to him, at the very least, or maybe I’ll do something like that with Emma instead - she seems like she’d be more amenable to sittin gstill that long. I saw her in Ice Princess, actually! Movies that include royalty in the title called to me, even when they weren’t actually about princesses, as it turned out; it was a great flick, though. I really liked the undertones of stressing to be the best and the spirit of determination. Do you think you could ice skate if you tried? It seems to me that a lot of the skill sets from cheerleading and ice skating cross over but of course I could be really wrong. I want to be well-rounded, I do! I’m helping Becca start a literary magazine, but I could afford something more artsy, so long as I don’t have to cheerlead. I’m an athlete but only barely, I doubt I could handle the stunts. I take it you’ll be trying out for the lead?

I bet there’s a lot of stuff that you don’t know about Bring It On, King Will. Like, do you know the names of all five movies? And that the musical is actually a totes different plot, but it’s most similar to Bring It On: All Or Nothing, the third film in the franchise starring Hayden Panettiere? Petitions are totes fun, I love setting up tables in the cafeteria and wearing my cheerleading uniform during school hours and rallying people to good causes. And what better cause than the most fun musical of all time being performed at our school? Don’t answer that, I totes know there are better causes out there, but it was for dramatic effect – see, I’m a shoo in for the drama club already! 

Wow! No, I can’t say I knew any of that - heck, I didn’t even know there were five whole Bring it On movies! I do know who Hayden Panettiere is, do I get any points for that? Regardless of the content of the movie and musical, I’m glad you found something to be passionate about that you can share with others - I’m sure the drama department will appreciate the input, particularly with that petition. I wasn’t going to point out all the better causes, don’t worry; after all, who can deny that we need fun once in a while too? Not that I was going to audition, but would all people trying to audition need to be skilled on some level of cheer or can people like me squeeze through the cracks?

No, they’re like all of them. It’s spring time, Will, not the dead of summer in Agrabah! Are you and Blake wearing those boot things guys put on their shirts? Or is he too cool for flowers? Um… I don’t know, why? I mean, prom’s not really that big of a deal to me so I don’t care if Becca’s around or not, but I’m sure she’s already gone and made plans with her other friends, since she seems to love doing that so much lately. Would I love to have Olly around? Of course, he’s my cousin and my best friend, but it just depends on if his girlfriend actually cares about whether or not he wants to be with his friends for the night.

Oh. Well, I don’t know, I’ve never personally interacted with any plants other than the ones you introduced me to! Do you mean boutineers? I don’t know, I like the idea of wearing them, they are quite traditional, but I haven’t really run it by Blake. When I get the chance to talk to him in person we discuss other things, not really prom details, but that’s a good point. Emma, come on! You know it’s not that Becca doesn’t care about what Oliver cares about, she’s just worried. If Oliver was willing to forgive her, shouldn’t that make it easier for you to be more accepting of her? We’re the Game Night 6! There’s a 6 in our name and we can regroup and call forth whoever we need to to fill that void, but it was always supposed to be us six, and of course if we never bind together again, I’m on your side, until we die, but it doesn’t have to be that way, right? If you just let Becca know she had no reason to be scared of us, things might go back to normal.

Don’t invite my boyfriend to the party, got it. Thanks for the instructions, dude; I can definitely manage that one. It just gives you a few hours to miss me – you’re always extra fun when I’ve been gone for a while, so I’m not complaining.

I’d like to promise that one day I’d be fun enough to attend with you, but my funnest days are behind me; I’m becoming an old man right before my very eyes, I hope that’s not a dealbreaker. At least in summer there’ll be less for me to do - I’m trying to block us out a whole month in the clear for you to throw killer parties that I can actually attend and not just attack you with all my pent-up energy after, even if that’s fun too. Any requests for a month in specific?