queen aelin

neil:

listen to me

acknowledge me

respect me

unless i perform the “soft, accommodating, feminine” woman first. i am not soft and accommodating. i am not all that feminine. i’m not good at it and i don’t want to be good at it. i just want to be me. i want to be able to talk about things upfront and directly like men are allowed to do without being immediately dismissed because i’m threatening. 

People seem to want more of Nicky and the twins, so I figured I would deliver.

Aaron does not ask Andrew to speak at his trial. His defense attorney pressed him to ask because otherwise, the case is all unsubstantiated.

Aaron will not ask. Andrew already said he didn’t want to. Aaron is not about to press him.

Nicky, of course, is freaking out. He’s the only one (other than perhaps Katelyn) that Aaron has kept updated at all.

“You have to ask Andrew. Are you crazy? Do you want to go to prison?”

He basically gets told to fuck off. But Nicky isn’t the type to leave well enough alone— let alone ‘not well at all’ alone.

He goes to Andrew.

Andrew is understandably pissed that Aaron hasn’t told him anything. He doesn’t say anything, promises Nicky nothing. But he shows up. Of course he does.

The trial is the most godawful thing Nicky has ever witnessed. It’s almost worse than seeing Aaron cling to Andrew in that bloody bedroom. Because Nicky sees it all again. And worse. Oh, God— he loves it as Andrew relives it.

Nicky cries through the trial. He can’t stop himself. Andrew doesn’t look at him. He doesn’t look at anyone. Except once. One time, Nicky sees his gaze flicker and rest on Aaron, whose head is bowed. His hands clasped in front of him. Nicky sees his shoulders shaking.

The twins do not talk on the way home. Nobody talks. Neil drives. No one else can.

Aaron stops going to Wednesday therapy sessions with Andrew. He doesn’t tell Nicky why— he just avoids him altogether. He avoids everyone altogether. Even Matt rarely sees him.

Andrew doesn’t go after him. He just… lets Aaron be.

Nicky can’t stand it. They’ve come so far to let it all go now, after everything. After what Andrew has confessed.

At first, Nicky is mad at Aaron on Andrew’s behalf. How can Aaron abandon Andrew knowing what they now know?

Then Nicky remembers. Remembers that quiet, withdrawn little boy with bruises covering his skin like spots.

He wants to ask Neil to help him. To fix them. But the time for Neil’s interference has come and gone. He has done all he can do for the twins— because he is limited by loving Andrew and not Aaron.

Nicky does not have that excuse. He loves both of them. He understands both of them. He knows he can’t fix them: they have to do that. But he can damn well try to get them on track.

He goes to Andrew.

“Talk to Aaron,” he says, one day after practice. Andrew shoots him a blank look, but Nicky sees the muscle in his jaw flutter.

“I’ve said all I have to say.”

He’s angry. God, of course he is. But Nicky knows it’s out of hurt— and out of anyone, Nicky knows Aaron the best.

“He’s not going to be the one to talk to you. He’s not… look, when he was a kid, Aunt Tilda used to pinch him when he would speak. She always shushed him. She used to say him talking gave her headaches. That’s all he knows, Andrew. Is how to shut up when someone is hurting. How to withdraw. Like— like his presence somehow makes everything worse.”

Andrew says nothing, but his face twitches. Such small tells that Nicky is only started to understand.

“He’s not talking to Katelyn even.”

Andrew is selfishly pleased by this. Nicky knows he would be.

“I know it’s not fair to ask you— but please try.”

Andrew again, says nothing. He might as well be a statue.

“He loves you too, you know.” Nicky says it, because the twins probably never will. But it’s the truth.

The next day, Andrew waits outside of Aaron’s classroom. Aaron looks surprised to see him.

“Follow me.”

He doesn’t wait to see if Aaron will obey. He knows he will.

They round a corner into an empty Parkin lot and Andrew turns on Aaron, his mouth thin.

“I showed you mine, you show me yours.”

“What?” Aaron doesn’t know what the hell hes talking about and Andrew halfway wants to throttle him. He moves into Aaron’s space and his twin moves back, but not before Andrew’s hand snakes out and grasps his hair, holding him in place.

Aaron flinches but doesn’t try to pull away. Aaron always used to flinch when anybody moved to touch him. It sparks a small flare of rage in Andrew. Aaron is the one person he would never, ever hurt. Aaron should not fear him. But Andrew also remembers seeing Aaron for the first time, flinching hard when one of the juice guards moved to fast to usher him in. The ways Aaron’s face took on a shameful color, like he was embarrassed by his reaction. Andrew remembers the bruises coloring Aaron’s face— his own face, on someone else.

“You do not get to freeze me out,” Andrew says in a dark voice.

“I’m not.” Aaron’s heart hammers. Looking at Andrew hurts. It hurts so bad that he wants to gasp from the pain. He can still feel the warm stickiness of Drake’s blood on his skin. That was the last time Andrew touched him. The first time Andrew touched him at all. Bile rises high. Shame and fury and so much pain.

“I’m sorry about Cass.”

Aaron doesn’t mean to say it. It’s not what he wanted to say. It’s stupid to allay anything at all.

“I’m not sorry about Drake. But I’m sorry about Cass. If I— ruined that or whatever.” Aaron is no good with words. He never has been.

“Cass can go fuck herself.” Casual, harsh words that Andrew can barely spit out.

The twins are close enough to share breath. Andrew releases Aaron suddenly and steps back.

“I don’t want to—“ Aaron is struggling. He can’t find the stupid fucking words. “I don’t want to make you take me to those sessions anymore. If you want to go alone, I don’t want to… ruin that too.”

Ruin. Andrew stares at him. A little but of understanding linking them now.

“Come or don’t,” Andrew says. “But you don’t get to hear all of my truths without giving me yours.”

He walks away, leaving Aaron staring after him.

The next week, they go to sessions together. This time, Aaron talks.

Nicky can’t help it. He cries when Neil tells him. Neil lets him hug him tight.

The twins aren’t perfect. But they’re trying to be better.

character aesthetics:

If you haven’t read the whole All For the Game trilogy, don’t read this fic until you have (and seriously, what are you waiting for?!?!).  It’s a scene from The King’s Men from Andrew’s point of view, inspired in part by an ask Nora answered.  @catastrophicallyinlovewithbooks @wayfaringbibliophile @snaps7  I think you guys were interested in this one

“Thank you.  You were amazing.”

The words were innocent and mundane enough to not merit a second thought, despite Allison’s idiotically gleeful reaction.  It was the bleak finality in the tone, the soft good-bye in Neil’s eyes, that set Andrew’s teeth on edge.  Why now, why here?

Before he could push Neil against the wall, before he could force the answers out of him, the security guard turned and Wymack gestured for them to follow.  Andrew lined up right behind Neil, training his eyes on the back of his head.  He could get what he needed on the bus.

The rowdy crowd barely registered, until a bottle came winging over.  Andrew tracked it in his peripheral vision as it hit Aaron in the shoulder; at his brother’s curse he glared into the crowd, daring whoever threw it to try again.  More debris followed, all narrowly missing the team before the pigs appeared, yelling at the crowd and starting to muscle their way between the fans and the Foxes. Then a cooler flew over Dan and knocked down a Palmetto State fan and all hell broke loose.

The surge of bodies forced the team apart, the Binghamton and Palmetto State fans throwing wild punches and not caring who was caught in the crossfire.  Andrew was nearly swept under by several larger men, and he punched and kicked his way free, deciding against pulling his knives as he didn’t want the jail time.  Kevin, he had to find Kevin; the man could brawl on the court but was useless off of it.  Finally, he ducked under a swinging arm and saw Kevin, standing white-faced on the fringes of the fray as usual, no doubt cataloguing his teammates’ injuries.  Abby was next to him, but nobody else Andrew recognized.  He turned back to the brewing riot.

Matt’s head appeared briefly before snapping back as a punch landed on his jaw; he shook it off and ducked back in.  Andrew stood up on his toes trying to find Aaron or Neil, but neither was visible.  Landing a blow to the kidney of someone in a Bearcats shirt, he pushed his way through flailing bodies.  He heard Allison’s indignant shriek echo above the noise, and caught a glimpse of her being yanked sideways before a flash of bright hair indicated Renee lighting into the fool who grabbed her.  

Then there were sirens blaring and more lights flashing red and white, as ambulances and more pigs descended upon the scene.  Just as Andrew heard police dogs begin to bark, there was a blinding blow to the side of his head that nearly took him off his feet.  He reflexively grabbed the arm that had hit him and twisted up and back; as the torso dropped in front of him he swept out with his heel, hooking the ankles and dropping the grunting man to his knees.  A fist to the back of the neck had the man sprawling, and Andrew stepped over him, blinking against the white spots in the side of his vision.  There was a crashing of batons against shields, then the unmistakable whiff of pepper spray followed by wailing from whatever idiot got in the line of the spray.

As the cops began to get a handle on the chaos, Andrew heard his name being yelled and turned to see Nicky waving an arm over the simmering crowd.  He began elbowing his way towards him.  The density of people thinned and he heard Nicky yell, “Neil!  Hey, Coach, have you seen Neil?”  He moved faster.

The team was clustered near where the fight had started.  A cop stood on the fringe talking to Wymack.  Matt looked the worst for wear; Renee, cradling her arm against her body, wasn’t far behind him.  Kevin appeared untouched, and Dan, Nicky and Aaron weren’t too bad off.  Nicky looked like he wanted to pull Andrew into a hug but refrained.  “Andrew, where’s Neil?”

Andrew shook his head and turned to start searching but Abby blocked his path.  “Andrew, let me look at you.”

“No.”  

He pushed past her, and heard Wymack mutter, “Let him go, Abby.”  Footsteps sounded just behind him; he didn’t turn to see who it was.  The crowd had thinned out drastically but there were still enough people to block one smallish man from easy view.  Andrew turned to see if at least it was one of the taller people who had followed; it was Kevin.  

“Do you see him?” Andrew asked.

Kevin paused from craning to see over the people around them to shake his head.  They wove through the parking lot surrounding the stadium in a loose serpentine like hunting dogs but the only flash of red hair Andrew saw belonged to a young girl.  Kevin let out a strangled noise and lunged forward; there was a brief surge of something in Andrew’s chest that promptly died when he spotted the racquet Kevin had picked up.  Fucking Kevin.  Fucking Exy.  But it was Neil’s racquet, of course it was Neil’s.  The stupid-ass orange and white heavy racquet that only Kevin and Neil would care so goddamn much about.

He’s gone.

Andrew gritted his teeth against that voice in his head.  They walked another hundred yards before a flash of orange caught his eye, in the hands of some assholes who were decidedly not entitled to it.  He caught them up, Kevin hanging back like the coward he was, and just the flash of one of the knives in his bands had them dropping the bag and running off.

He’s gone.

Kevin came over and knelt next to him as he unzipped the bag.  Just Neil’s sweaty uniform and shoes and pads in the main compartment.  Andrew looked at the net pocket at the end; there was a flash of silver and the slight jingle of metal.  Neil’s phone and his keys.

Andrew pulled the keys out first.  He found himself tracing the edge of the key to the house in Columbia as he always saw Neil do and forced himself to stop. The phone, the phone had something, had to have something.

He flipped it open and checked the texts, all from the team except one, the most recent one, from an unknown number.  It just read “0”.  Nothing else, just the number.  He scrolled further but there was no other oddity.  The call log only contained his number, Wymack’s from the end of December, and then one from tonight from a 443 area code, an incoming call of 67 seconds and a call out that didn’t connect.  He pressed “send” and it went straight to a mailbox that was not set up.  Shit.

He’s gone.

“We should get back,” Kevin said.  Andrew gave him the finger and stood up, hefting the bag over his shoulder and turning to continue his circuit.  By the time they rounded the far end of the stadium and headed back around the long way, the lot was emptying out and there was no sign of Neil, no flash of red other than the Coke signs on the food stands.  They finished their lap, spotting the PSU bus but still no Neil.  There was relief on Wymack’s and Abby’s faces when they reappeared; it disappeared when Andrew slung the bag onto the pavement.

“You didn’t find him?”

Andrew gave Wymack a flat look in response.  Kevin shook his head.  “I think he must’ve run,” he says, glancing at Andrew.

“But why?” Abby asked.  “Why would he do that after all this time?”

Kevin looked like he was going to say something, like he knew something, but he stopped and shook his head again instead.  “I don’t know.”

“Bullshit,” Andrew said, and Kevin took a step back as Andrew turned to him.  Yes, Kevin definitely knew something; Andrew could read it in every line of his body, in the flat panic in his eyes.  “He wouldn’t have run without these.”  He held up the keys he’d found in the duffel.  Without his keys he couldn’t get into the dorm; without getting into the dorm he couldn’t get his binder with what was left of his money.  

Andrew pocketed the keys and the phone and turned back, noting as he did so that Matt and Renee were missing as well.  Sent to the hospital, no doubt, but that didn’t matter.  He made another circuit of the stadium and this time nobody followed him.  Still no sign of him, and Andrew could feel it then, feel the fire burning in his veins, the fire that his damn medication had damped for so long.  

If we don’t find him I will burn this place to the ground.

This time when he made it back around Abby wasn’t taking no for an answer.  When he waved her off, she promised him that Wymack would get security to open up the stadium for them to search.  She did a concussion test and felt gently along his cheekbone and he forced himself to stay still, to not flinch, to not give her any reason to take him from here.  The light she shone in his eye was too bright and he blinked back against it.

“Andrew,” she said in her stupidly calm medical professional voice, “I need to take you to the hospital.”

“No.”  He started to walk away and she reached for him, stopping at the look he leveled at her.  

“You have some bleeding in your eye.  You could have detached your retina.  We need to get it checked out, if it’s not treated you could lose vision.”

“Fuck off, Abby.”  He ignored Nicky’s indignant reaction and turned to Wymack.  “I let her examine me, now get me into the stadium.”

Wymack threw his cigarette on the ground and stepped on it.  “Damnit, Andrew, you need to listen to her.  If Neil’s somehow in the stadium, he’s okay.”  Andrew started walking towards the gate; as he approached he spotted a rent-a-cop standing near it.  

The man shrugged when Andrew told him he’d left something behind, and let him in without protest.  He checked the stands first, running the steps as if he hadn’t just played the damn sport, as if it wasn’t past eleven at night.  There was nothing, no sign of Neil, and the fire in his veins flared higher.  He went below, to the visitors’ locker room but it was empty, even the trash cans had been dumped.  The showers were still damp but there was no other evidence they had ever been there.  He paused on his way back out, picturing Neil’s stricken face, hearing again the farewell in his words.  

Damn you, Neil.

When he emerged, Wymack was waiting for him.  “Andrew, you have to go with Abby and get checked out.  I’ll stay here in case he comes back.”

“Call the police.”

“I already talked to the campus police.  He’s an adult, Andrew.  They won’t do anything, not yet.”

“Call the police.”

Cursing, Wymack pulled out his cell phone and dialed. 9-1-1.  Andrew listened as Wymack explained the situation, about one of his players going missing in the riot that had just taken place at Binghamton.  Listened as Wymack described him: 5’3”, 135 pounds, red hair, blue eyes, tattooed number four on his left cheekbone.  Distilled to his barest essentials, missing all that made him Neil.

Andrew turned away from that useless thought as Wymack hit End on his phone and walked over to Abby.  “You can take me now.”  

The hospital was crowded with the fools who had been caught in the riot, and an hour passed before he was taken to a bed that sat in a hallway.  They didn’t even bother with curtains around it, the nurse took his vitals and a few minutes later the harried doctor came by with some fancy equipment.  Andrew didn’t speak to any of them as they dilated his eye and looked carefully at the internal structures, just hopped off the bed and walked away when they reported no damage to the retina and discharged him with some sort of drops to put in every four hours.

Abby took the bottle from him before he could drop it in the trash can, and they met up with Renee in the waiting room.  Andrew grabbed her chin and studied her black eye for a second. Despite the splint on her wrist she seemed acceptably okay, and she nodded to him with her slow smile when he released her face.  Then they had to wait around for Matt.

Andrew was ready to call a cab to get back to the stadium by the time Matt was discharged, even though he knew Wymack or Kevin or Nicky would’ve texted him if there had been any sign of Neil.  When the bus pulled back into the lot of course it was just as they had left it, a parking lot full of trash and the rest of the team.

He’s gone.

Andrew followed Abby off the bus and listened to her give Wymack a status update on the three of them.  Dan and Allison went onto the bus to check on Matt and Renee; Nicky and Kevin sidled closer to Andrew.  Aaron was sitting on a bench a little ways off and he was just staring at Andrew.  He wanted to go over and make him stop but it wasn’t worth it.  

Instead he started walking again, then jogging, lapping the stadium again, and there was still no sign of him, still nothing but the burning hollowness growing in his gut.  He wanted to start dismantling the stadium, tearing it apart bolt by bolt with his bare hands until they found some sign, some answer.  He pulled the phone out of his pocket and looked again at the “0”, looked again at the number he already knew by heart.  Who was this?  Who dared to call his Neil?  Who were they who were they who were they -

“Andrew.”  It was Wymack again, and this time he handed him a cigarette.  It had been hours since he’d had one and he took a long drag, letting the nicotine settle in just a little bit.

“We need to think about heading back,” Wymack said, carefully not looking at him.  

“No.”  It was Dan who spoke for him, who spared him the necessity of putting a knife in Wymack’s gut.  “Not until we know more, Coach.  We can sleep on the bus or something, but we can’t leave yet.”

Nicky and Matt nodded in agreement, and Wymack and Abby exchanged long looks.  In the end, everybody but Andrew filed onto the bus to sleep.  He stretched out on the bench Aaron had vacated, using Neil’s duffel as a pillow.  Not that he could sleep, when every time he closed his eyes he could hear a door clicking shut, the groan of a mattress as weight settled on it.  Not when eyes open or shut he could feel himself falling, falling, even as the ridges of the bench dug into his back.

Hours passed, and he didn’t know how long he had been shivering in the damp chill before dawn when he heard the bus doors open and Wymack emerged, phone held to his ear.  

“Yes, this is David Wymack,” he was saying as his feet hit the pavement.  “What?  Who- oh!  He’s where?”  His hand came up to cover his eyes and Andrew sat up and blinked to clear his eyes.  He could see a faint tremor in that hand in the bright lights of the parking lot, and suddenly he was at Wymack’s elbow without being aware he had moved.  “How the hell- okay, okay, I understand.  Yes.  Yes.  Damnit, I said yes.  We’ll be there as soon as we can, text me the address.”  He pulled the phone away from his ear and swore softly at the blank screen that stared back at him.

“Where is he.”

There was exhaustion and grief in every line of Wymack’s face when he turned to Andrew.  “Get on the bus, Andrew.”

“Where is he.”  The wind was whistling past his ears as he fell.  he’s gone, he’s gone, he’s gone

“Just get on the bus.”

Wymack turned and climbed the stairs and Andrew followed, so close he was almost stepping on him.  Abby was awake, and nodded at whatever Wymack muttered in her ear, but everybody else was passed out on the seats.  Everyone but Kevin.  Kevin, who could sleep anywhere.  Kevin, who was impossible to wake up, but who was looking at them now with eyes like burned-out holes.  Andrew went down the bus to sit behind him.

Abby got behind the wheel and the engine turned over with a throaty rumble.  The bus’s vibrations startled Dan and Renee into wakefulness, and at a gesture from Wymack they woke the rest of the team.  As Abby pulled out onto the stadium street, Wymack cleared his throat.

“I just got a call from the FBI,” Wymack said.  The team looked at each other in surprise and confusion - all but Kevin.  Andrew noticed the way he curled into himself.  “Neil has been found.  He’s in Baltimore.”

“Is he alive?” Kevin asked hoarsely.

“Jesus, Kevin,” Nicky said, startled.

“Really, Kevin, that’s…” Abby trailed off.

“Is he?” Andrew demanded, as Wymack hadn’t answered yet.

“Yes.”  Wymack rubbed the back of his neck.  “He’s alive, but he’s been badly injured.”  He raised his voice to be heard over the resulting exclamations.  “No, I don’t know how badly, I just know he was admitted to the hospital.  I don’t know what happened, or how he ended up there, just that he was taken in a raid on his father’s house.  They’re asking us to come down there so they can ask us some questions.”  

The bus was a cacophony of sounds, of voices, of questions and shouts and the creaking of vinyl seats.  Yet it went silent when Andrew turned to Kevin and said, “You know.”  Kevin’s green eyes were wide with fear and something else as he looked up at Andrew, but he didn’t reply beyond a quick shake of his head.  “You know something, and you’re going to tell me, right now.”

Kevin looked down, too cowardly to hold Andrew’s gaze.  With a quick lunge, Andrew got his right hand around his throat and shoved him up against the window.  “Tell me, now.”  There were more yells and the stomping of feet but when Kevin didn’t even try to answer, Andrew just squeezed, increasing pressure until Kevin was choking, until his face was purple and he was opening his mouth soundlessly, his hands slapping ineffectually against Andrew’s armbands.  He held on until an arm wrapped around Andrew’s own neck and more hands were yanking on him, twisting his left arm back and around, until slender fingers dug into the pressure points on his wrist and his hand went numb.  He was pulled back against a large body, and another was crowding him, shoving him by sheer force of mass up the aisle.

Kevin was gasping and coughing, Nicky and Dan were crowding around him, Abby yelling something from the front.  Wymack was still holding him, Matt still pushing him back, ready to fight even with the bruises and torn skin on his hands.  Renee was watching with her unfathomable eyes, and he knew she would stop him again, would do whatever she had to, would turn the blades she had given him against him if necessary.  Andrew didn’t give a shit about any of this, all he cared about was getting the truth, finally the truth.

It took a long time, too long, before Dan and Wymack would get out of his face; before they would stop yelling enough to hear him.  “He knows,” Andrew kept saying, and he couldn’t understand why they didn’t seem to see the urgency.  “He knows something about Neil, and he hasn’t told us, and now Neil is in some hospital because of it.”

Finally they stopped, and Kevin started.  Andrew watched him the whole time, watched every word leave his lips as he talked about Neil who was really Nathaniel, whose father was a hit man - the hit man - for the main branch of the Moriyamas.  Nathaniel, who had been sold to Tetsuji, who should have been like the useless Jean or Kevin or dead.  Nathaniel, whose mother had taken him and fled, who had never told him what they were running from, who had taught him to lie and hide and do whatever he could to survive but nothing about how to live.

And then the story was over and the sky was lightening and they were driving through New Jersey, and there was nothing to do but wait.  Years in juvie had taught him all about waiting, about finding that quiet place where the buzzing disappears.  Yet he kept finding himself playing with Neil’s phone, with his keys, with these pieces of him that might have been truth or might have been lies.  He should have known better, should have known when Neil asked him to let him go… but he had asked, and Andrew had agreed, and he didn’t know what scraps of him they were going to find when they got to Baltimore.  So he watched the bland scenery and fought back against the fall, against the dawning realization that Neil had done what he always had said he would on the roof; he had dragged Andrew with him, I am falling -  

The FBI had put them up in some cheap-ass motel with a pool that it was too cold to use.  They were herded into one room with double beds and not enough space, and there was some prick in a suit who kept fingering his gun and trying to act like he was tough.  

“What hospital is he at?” Andrew asked Wymack, who looked at him blankly.  “What hospital?” he asked the prick in the suit.

“It doesn’t matter,” was the answer, and Andrew debated pulling one of his knives.

“It matters,” said Wymack, staring down at the man.  

Another man and a woman showed up then, asking questions but refusing to answer any.  They hadn’t taken into account who they were dealing with, evidently, and when they refused to disclose Neil’s location they were met with stony silence from the Foxes.  Even Nicky kept his mouth shut by some miracle.  

Andrew had had enough, it didn’t matter what they said or what they brought for food or the fact that he knew nothing about Baltimore and had no clue where they were.  He found a map in the motel’s information book and began studying it, marking where they were and the three closest hospitals.  If they wouldn’t bring him to Neil, he’d go there himself.

An agent blocked the door when they saw where he was going.  He gave her a bored look that she met with an impressive one of her own.  “Coach, control your players,” drawled the big man who had been there first.  

“Andrew,” Wymack said, “you don’t want to make this more difficult for Neil.”

“We don’t even know for sure that they have Neil,” Andrew retorted.  “We’re going by their word.”

“Oh, we have Nathaniel,” the female agent said.  “But we don’t need to prove anything to you.  We need you to give us your statements, and then we’ll be on our way and you can go back to Palmetto State.”

Andrew tapped his lip twice, then pointed at her.  “Fuck that.  I’ll give you my statement after I see Neil.”

There was a chorus of agreement from the rest of them, and the female agent rolled her eyes and left.  Andrew tried to follow her - almost managed to - but the fat agent blocked him and pulled out his handcuffs.

“Coach, if you can’t control him I’m going to have to take him into custody.”

Wymack bristled, but he turned to Andrew, defeat written across his face.  “Just…just cuff him to me, I’ll keep track of him.”

The click of the handcuffs was familiar, as was the boredom of the confinement.  The others all found stuff to keep them occupied, the television or a book or just pacing up and down.  Andrew sat cross-legged on the bed and waited, counting breaths until everything around faded, but he couldn’t stop that sense of falling.

Just as Abby had broken out her kit to work on Allison and Renee and Matt, the female agent returned some time later looking irritated.  She handed her phone to Wymack, who glanced at Andrew then turned away as much as the cuff would allow while he pressed the phone to his ear.  “No, of course not.  Why would we?”  There was a long pause and Andrew could hear angry buzzing through the phone.  “Sure.  Sure.  Okay, I’ll move it.”  He handed the phone back to the agent and turned to Andrew.  “Get up.”

“What?  No.”  

Wymack ignored him and stood up.  Everyone’s eyes turned to him. “They’re going to bring Neil by when he’s discharged from the hospital,” he said.  “I need to go move the bus, they won’t come here until I do.”

“Why not?” Matt asked.

“Press,” guessed Allison, and Wymack nodded.  He looked at Andrew, a patient question in his eyes, and Andrew unfolded himself and got to his feet.  He scanned the parking lot when they reached it, memorizing the cars, the nondescript black and gray and blue sedans and SUVs that dotted the lot.  There were men dotting the lounging area in catalog-ready polo shirts and khakis, all obviously feds; same with the women who were settling onto lounges around the pool despite the temperature barely reaching the 60s.  Andrew wondered if anyone actually fell for this bullshit.

Wymack opened up the bus but waited for Andrew to be ready before he climbed up.  Andrew had to stand and brace himself while they moved to a lot behind an office building about half a mile away, the cuff not allowing him to reach a seat.  As soon as the ignition was off he was moving, Wymack cursing behind him and finally using his weight to plant Andrew long enough to secure the bus.

The walk back earned them more than a couple of looks, though Wymack tried to look casual about the fact that he was handcuffed to Andrew.  The difference in their heights made it impossible for Andrew’s hand to dangle naturally but he didn’t care.  Wymack accepted the silence until they reached the parking lot and there was a new SUV there.  “Andrew,” he warned, bracing himself against Andrew’s lunge forward.  “Be careful.  These are federal agents, and I have no idea what happened, why Neil is in their custody.”  Andrew ignored him, plowing ahead up the stairs.  “Andrew, they are giving us a gift -”

The sound Wymack’s body made as he hit the side of the motel would have been satisfying in another situation.  It was the understanding in his eyes that was unforgivable.  But Andrew didn’t have time to deal with that, so he let it go and pushed into the door, shoving the fed out of the way.  

the foxhole court, narrated by percy jackson.

“I Am Offered A Foxy Deal”

“I Meet The Worst Kind Of Twin Pun”

“I Get Dragged Into Some Gay Shit”

“My Troubled Past Comes Back To Haunt My Ass” 

“I Strip, But Not In A Fun Way”

“Coach Gets The Gang Together”

“I Have The Worst Night Out, Ever”

“I Get Dragged Into Some Gay Shit, Pt. 2″

“I Become Kevin’s Super Secret Project”

“I Go See A Doctor For The First Time”

“We Kick Serious Jackal Butt, Sort Of”

“I Don’t Want To Be On This Show”

“I Want To Be On This Show”

what what probably going through Rhys’s head on the summer court pleasure barge when Feyre stood up abruptly after seeing him shamelessly “seducing” Cresseida,…with her shields down, thinking about how UNHAPPY she was about the prospect of Rhys “bedding” Cresseida, Feyre wanting to “throttle” Cresseida for being the object of Rhys’s affection, how she wanted to feel loved and not lonely,…FINALLY an emotion instead of the emptiness that she has carried all up until this point.

So Neil has been living with Matt and Dan for like, years, and they love him and everything, but he can’t cook

He just, can’t. 

So they take an example of his cooking to the show and he just gets in. 

Automatically.

They won’t say I told you so but,,,

So he’s part of the top fourteen or whatever worst cooks along with, drumroll please…Andrew

He was nominated by Aaron and Nicky. They think he’s just the worst.

The most they’ve ever seen him make is microwaveable soup.

(He really just doesn’t give a shit)

And he doesn’t really care what he eats like half the time. Ice cream is what he cares about

But he made a promise to learn to cook so he’ll try

So all of the worst cooks are lined up and out walk the chefs- Kevin Day and Riko Moriyama

Bum bum baa!

And in this au Riko is still a dick, but not as extreme.

But Riko and Kevin have been battling it out since culinary school.

Riko insists he is number one

He is not

Anyway so the show is about to begin and Neil is like- why am I doing this? I’m not that bad? 

Okay, so the first round goes down and they want to know how everyone does without any instruction. So they can choose teams

So Neil is making his food and he’s like I’ll make my usual

He just takes a bunch of fruit and puts it on a plate

Like, whole pieces of fruit

Unpeeled, unsliced apples. Some grapes in a bowl

(Why would I cut up the fruit? I don’t need to cut it? I have teeth?)

And he just- takes a granola bar and sprinkles it on top

“For garnish”

And Kevin and Riko are like, he didn’t even cook anything???

Andrew just cooks a can of soup.

That’s all.

But he get on both Riko and Kevin’s radar, cause, I mean, he didn’t burn anything.

Anyway, they get to choosing who they want on their teams and they get going.

Andrew is on Kevin’s team, Neil is on Riko's 

Yikes.

And Neil just *clenched fist* hates Riko.

Anyway, so there are the basic challenges

Replicating a recipe

People around them are floundering

Stoves are being caught on fire

People manage to serve completely raw meat

Andrew somehow manages to stare into the camera like he’s on the office

Knife skills

Neil flies through these stages. He can slice and dice a chicken.

No hesitation

His knife cuts are precise and Kevin is wowed

He starts taking special attention with Neil.

He wants him on his team.

He’s doing enough to pass but he’s not on the top

Memory tests

Andrew has everything memorized so while people are sprinkling tons of saffron on their food he knows the correct ingredient is 

Riko is loosing it. Poor Jean is taking the brunt of it.

Week after week people are going home still not able to cook for shit

But back at the house Andrew and Neil are staying in bunk beds near each other.

And they start

#bonding

They met on the fire escape while smoking.

They started talking and they both noticed they are good with knives and they both have their fair share of scars

Andrew may or may not decide to try harder so that he can stick around.

Anyway, there’s a gelato flavor creativity challenge and Andrew wins because he is all about that gelato so Kevin gets to choose one person to take from Riko’s team to go on his own team and he gets to move one of his team members to Riko’s team.

He takes Neil, and gives Riko’s team Jack.

The rounds are progressing

Every time it cuts to one of Neil’s asides he says something scathing about Riko and how he treats his team

Roasted 

In his asides Andrew doesn’t say anything

Andrew learns to make desert.

He is happy.

They finally get down to the final two on each team

Neil vs. Andrew

Neil cooks up some fancy dish for Matt.

Matt takes a bite and cries

He literally gets up and give Neil a bear hug.

Andrew cooks for Aaron and he can tell is a way that Aaron enjoys it.

Yay

He has accomplished what he needed to. He promised he’d learn to cook and he did.

Aaron stops by him during the down time

“Now you can cook fro Katelyn and I”

“Not fucking likely”

Though he does make gelato for his nieces

Neil makes it onto the final round

Andrew holds out his hand and slides Neil a piece of paper from his armbands

All super-secret 

Once he gets behind stage 

Neil’s like “oh, what’s this?”

It is Andrew phone number.

He looks around and Andrew is already gone

Neil smiles and when he gets back to his bunk bed he types it in

Matt will finally be so proud that Neil actually uses his phone

Jean vs. Jack

Jean only plates 2 out of 3 plates of the main course- one for Kevin and one for his boyfriend Jeremy.

Riko is furious; he has no food. He feels betrayed

He sits there fuming

Jean’s food is good, but since he didn’t plate enough he loses

Jack wins by default

Jean walks away, one hand entwined with his boyfriends, the other flipping Riko off

Neil is cracking up- he used to share a cooking station back when he was on Riko’s team so they had a bit of bonding during the challenges

So now it’s down to Neil and Jack Neil is not going to let team pain in the ass winHe fights in the kitchen and Kevin gives him great recipes and

He sprints in the grocery store.

He grabs all of his items in record time

He’s spent a lot of time hiding out in grocery stores when he was on the run- he knows where something is stored

Jack barely practices because he thinks he’s hot shit

The showdown goes down.

The judges- Allison, Renee, Laila, and Sara are all there 

Neil’s food is better.

He is triumphant

Kevin is yelling

Riko is mad

Neil wins the money

After the show he asks Andrew over for dinner.

He cooks

It is delicious.