not sure who's still on here. i've had this tumblr since 2012; i was 16 then. i became increasingly inactive on here since 2020 due to all the life changes as an adult, familiarizing myself with my (then) depression and anxiety, and just choosing which social media apps to keep and delete.
nearly 5 years ago i thought i'd never fall in love again and was in a state of heartbreak and uncertainty. i've been in my healthiest and most loving relationship for (approaching) 4 years now. i've been a labor and delivery nurse for just a year longer, approaching 5 years now.
there was a period in time after getting covid where my anxiety really took a dive because of suffering from long-covid, and i was paranoid i'd be in a permanent state of fatigue, horrible stamina, and malaise. it got me so anxious my chest felt tight and i had to get my heart checked out to see if there was anything wrong. turns out...really was just anxiety and one hell of a case of PTSD as a result of long-covid. this is what led me to get started on anxiety meds because of the constant fight-or-flight state i was in; i couldn't take it anymore, and i couldn't live like that anymore. and i'm so glad i did, because it helped me take back my life.
what other updates have i got for you? life is truly beautiful; that sums up what life's been like for the past 2 years.
i'm only getting older but i also feel younger at the same time. i've surrounded myself with precious friends that channel and heal their inner children like me. they are my safe spaces and love me for who i am. i'm able to advocate, heal, see, and do all the things little kris would've wanted. i travel, i play video games, i lift, i record precious moments, i do all the things. i understand my anxiety more and properly medicated myself to function normally. the late 20s are underrated and are waaay better than the early 20s. i'm more comfortable with myself and am much more at a place of stability. i understand life more. i understand me more.
a lot of my family and friends are getting married, owning houses, and starting families. while my boyfriend and i are wanting to get married and own a house together someday, we aren't sure if we want kids. it seems like a heavy no right now. i don't think i care enough whether i end up becoming a mother one day or not. whatever decision we decide though, i know it'll only lead to a beautiful life together.
what have you been up to?
what important lessons have you learned within the past couple years?
are you proud of who you are right now?
i'd like to think of this as a check-in. maybe i'll do another check-in in a couple years.
i hope you all are doing well too, whoever you are, wherever you may be ♡
yousharknotpass
romaincrisis
2087
germansingergirl
