just some guy

"But there is one thing that can overwrite the dark...

A white pen known as hope."

Weird Vibes - submitted by kieriblade

(WIP) Finished the next part of the Deltarune animation

Ok for the sake of my beautiful vision, let's pretend this is happening in the dark world, Carol isn't the knight and I'm too lazy to design a dark world version of her

[ID: digital comic of Queen and Carol Holiday from Deltarune. Queen holds Carol's shoulders, and Carol sweats, looking at one of her hands. Queen's dialogue is in her capitalized case as she says, "Ok First Of All Under Any Other Circumstance I Would Have Been Like: Wow Lonely Mothers In My Area (Jackpot). But I Need You To Listen To Me This Time. Because If I Don't Tell You Nobody Will LMAO"

Queen leans in very close to Carol's face, their noses brushing and mouths an inch away from each other. Carol looks at Queen as she continues, "You Don't Know What You're Doing. And I Know This Because I Didn't Know What I Was Doing Too, Once. Take Care Of Noelle. Out Of All The Things You're Doing Wrong: That One Is The Wrongest. Noelle Deserves: Better. I Am: Better Than You."

Queen then waves and walks away, saying, "Ok Good Talk I Must Go Now Toodles Tell Noelle I Said I Found: Best Rom Download Sites For Her (No Virus)." Carol, watching her leave, thinks "What the hell was that."]

How even though you’ve had not even two minutes of screen-time, you’re already one of the most complex and captivating characters in all of Deltarune. Carol Holiday. How you sadden, terrify, fascinate, and absolutely enrage me all at the same time. Carol Holiday. How you manage to be so sympathetic, and yet so detestable. Carol Holiday. How I pity you for the pain you’ve endured, and despise you for all the pain you’ve inflicted.

Carol Holiday. How I love that the happy past you once had with your family and the Dreemurrs means so much to you that you’re willing to do anything to reclaim that happiness again. Carol Holiday. How I hate that your obsession with the past is denying everyone a future, for your family, your friends, and everyone in Hometown.

Carol Holiday. How I love that you treasured your daughter’s paper snowflakes so much that you had them bronzed so they can be preserved forever. Carol Holiday. How I hate you for allowing your own daughter to be locked out of her own house, and how the many rules you put in place to protect her are only making her more vulnerable.

Carol Holiday. How I love that you care so much about Noelle’s safety that you went out of your way to cancel a school day because of the rain. Carol Holiday. How I absolutely hate you for how, despite caring about her safety, you’ve inflicted so much emotional harm and abuse on her, how you have destroyed her self-confidence and self-esteem, and how your overprotective parenting is inflicting upon her the very harm you think you’re shielding her from.

Carol Holiday. How I love you for the almost-familial relationship you had with the Dreemurrs, and how you still care about them even after growing apart. How I hate that you’ve taken advantage of Asgore’s predicament and are straining at your relationship with Toriel by endorsing his futile attempts to get back with her despite how clear she's made it she doesn't want to.

Carol Holiday. How I love that you had such a good relationship with Kris, even though they’re so far removed from the perfection, orthodoxy, and normalcy you value. Carol Holiday. How I hate you for exploiting your relationship with them and taking advantage of their guilt and grief to rope them into a plan that is not good yourself and especially not good for them, and have caused them to betray the friends and family.

Carol Holiday. How I love that, despite all the crazy and scary stuff Kris used to do with Noelle, you still allowed them to develop a bond so strong and meaningful, that even after they’ve grown apart, they both still care so much for each other and want to reconnect again. Carol Holiday. How I hate you for refusing to allow Noelle to have a relationship with Susie and refusing to hear both of them out, despite the fact that they clearly love each other so much, and that it would be for the best if they were both together. 

Carol Holiday. How I hope that you will see the error of your ways and heal from the pain that your Dess’s disappearance caused you. Carol Holiday. How I hope that Noelle, Kris, Rudy, Asgore, Toriel, and everyone you've wronged crashes out on you for everything you've put them through.

Carol Holiday. How I love all the nuance and care Toby Fox put into your character. Carol holiday. How I hate the fandom for disregarding it so they can portray you as either a heartless villain or some poor, misunderstood saint that has done nothing wrong.

Forgive me for posting about this topic on Mother's Day, but I've seen a lot of discussion and debate about whether Carol is genuinely abusive to Noelle, and the reason I believe so is, interestingly enough, demonstrated in how she treats others besides Noelle. And that's because they reveal qualities about her that you see in a lot of toxic and abusive people.

The first red flag she has is that SHE JUST DOES NOT LISTEN! In the top-left screencap, Toriel is irked that Carol has been endorsing Asgore's attempts to get back with her, despite making it VERY clear that she wants to stay divorced from him. And the top-right one shows Rudy getting irked that Carol still refuses to let Noelle have her own key, which would stop her from getting locked out of the house. Carol isn't a bad mother because she makes mistakes; she's a bad mother because SHE ACTS LIKE SHE CAN NEVER MAKE ANY. Even though she does care about others, she always acts like she's the only person who knows what's best for everyone, and because of that, what anyone else thinks about what she does doesn't matter at all. She doesn't care about what Rudy has been saying about how her policy of "everything important stays at home" is getting her own daughter locked out of her own house, because she stubbornly thinks it's the best way to keep her safe. She doesn't care about how Toriel feels about Asgore constantly trying to undo the divorce (even to the point of stalking her!) because, being the reactionary she is, she thinks that Toriel's life would be better if she were back with him again, despite all of the evidence that it ain't possible. So if she's the kind of person who refuses to admit when she's wrong, then why did she apologize to Kris? And that's the thing: she didn't.

And that brings us to the second reg flag (and one that's no less sinister): she's willing to manipulate the people close to her to get what she wants from them (or what she thinks is good for them). In the bottom screencap, after ruining Noelle and Susie's date, she apologizes to Kris and then tells them they're always welcome at the house. If you pay close attention, you'll see that she didn't really tell Kris what she was "sorry" about. And that's because her apology is a classic "I'm sorry if I made you feel that way." In other words, her expression of remorse is only being done to ensure Kris still cooperates with her and helps her with whatever plan she roped them into by presenting the illusion that she cares about the impact her actions had on them, which is emphasized by the fact that she's not sorry for what she did to Noelle or Susie. The reason why her capacity for manipulation and deception is such a massive red flag is that it shows that she's willing to violate and breach the trust that all healthy relationships must have.

So there you have it. She's not an abusive mother because she's not perfect; she's abusive because she acts like she is perfect and that it entitles her to be underhanded and dishonest with the people closest to her, because in her view, only she knows what's best for everyone's happiness, and that goal justifies what means she used to accomplish it.

I can't stress enough how Carol Holiday is literally the perfect antagonist for Susie! Not just because she's such a complex and multilayered character in her own right, but also because she embodies the opposing themes that Susie embodies!

Susie has always been a person with destructive and disruptive tendencies, and she still has them even after her little arc in Chapter 1. But while before her acts of destruction were because she believed she couldn't do anything to change things for the better, now she's doing them TO BRING ABOUT CHANGE AND BECAUSE SHE KNOWS THINGS CAN BE BETTER NOT JUST FOR HERSELF BUT FOR THOSE SHE CARES ABOUT.

She's the revolutionary who throws down the old regime so that those under its heel can actually prosper! She's the spring thaw that melts away the long, brutal winter. And that's what makes Carol's character all the more compelling! Because she embodies said long, brutal winter! She embodies the old regime!

She's dissatisfied with things as they are, just like Susie is! But unlike the RADICAL Susie, who embodies going forward, the REACTIONARY Carol wants to return things to a certain point in the past (and you can't blame her, given how that past was a happy one with her family and the Dreemurr family still intact). But just like all reactionaries, she can't or won't acknowledge that it isn't possible and that her attempts to force everything back are hurting everyone, especially her loved ones!

And we can see the conflict between Susie and Carol, and what they embody affects their relationships with Kris and Noelle. Both Kris and Noelle's struggles parallel each other in how they are both being forced to be people who they aren't. Forced to play roles that they don't want to play and are hurting them both! Forced to accept that the powers that they submit to know what's best for them, even more than themselves! And then Susie, being the great disruptor and revolutionary she is, comes into their lives and shows them that they don't have to!

They don't have to accept what's been imposed upon them! They don't have to be people who they aren't! They don't have to let Dess's guitar stay in her room never to be played again, or keep being a puppet for some heart-shaped cosmic horror! They can be true to themselves, and they should be true to themselves! They should be free to let loose and embrace their weird, unorthodox, and freaky natures! They should because...

...despite everything, it's still you!

roki roki dess!!!

Odile et les Oiseaux

Yep, I didn't paint just one Odile but two. This idea was actually rattling around my brain longer but took me a bit to figure out exactly how I wanted to pose it out and finish it. Really happy with the final result!

I love how Odile talks to birds and other animals when you're hanging out on her friend quest. What a woman <333

Also this was the first painting I finished in the new year! And what a wonderful one to start out with~

Happy Birthday Odile!

Here's the finished version of the Odile Zine I drafted a few months back, just in time for her birthday!

If you want to print and fold your own copy, you can find the zine here on my Ko-Fi! (for free unless you want to throw some money my way)

And a bonus birthday doodle for madame~

Odile in a pinch!

My painted tribute to the lesbian catnip that is Odile's low hp sprite which I am not immune to.

This was my attempt at a full-body version, Odile wiping blood off her cheek as she gets back up to head into the fray once more, danger glinting in her eyes...

...alright that's enough Odile poetry from me