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@kerochan85
main fallout titles + intro themes

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I’m cold and I have a headache so have a headache-y Tony in a warm sweater!
OKAY SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME HOW WE GOT FROM THIS
TO THIS
Are you freakin serious?!?! This is what the outfit looks like btw
The jeans are even kinda baggy at the shoe??? It’s more of a relaxed fit than skinny???
And she’s not really baring any skin??
Seriously she almost DIED fighting for her right to education and now she has the opportunity to study at Oxford and people are bashing her clothes 😒
She’s a fucking adult who’s done more the past 5 years for equal rights and education than most will do in their entire life’s
Things they don’t tell you about top surgery
- Talk to the surgeon about the size you want your new areolas/nipples (don’t be afraid to ask)
- Numbness. No one talks about this for guys who are about to have surgery. You’re going to be numb all in your chest area, especially where the incisions were. They cut nerves as they pass along your chest, and it can take up to a year to regenerate those nerves. Still, feels super foreign for the first two weeks
- Make your bed into a pillow chair, body pillow, two on each side, and two for your head.
- Sleep alone. I tried to sleep with my girlfriend and it was miserable. You really do need the entire bed for yourself
- Go on Groupon, & get yourself a 10 foot lightning cable iPhone charger, BEST THING EVER, can reach from wherever you are
- Don’t take a week off from work, take two. You will regret the one week, and love the extra time
- When they say “don’t move too much, even after the first week”. LISTEN. I moved way too much and got so sore super quickly.
- Drink lots of water & eat if your taking the pain medication, otherwise your stomach feels super funky.
- Get stool softeners, & don’t be afraid to take those babies. Don’t wait a week to poop. you’ll surely regret it.
- The drains are scary & they may hurt while draining or rewrapping your dressings, but once they come out, the second they do, its no more pain, its crazy.
i hope this helps someone, because i wish i knew all of this when i was having mine a month ago. Looking back its like everyone forgets all the real negatives, its a great experience, & i healed very well & quick compared to most, but the first few days are crazy. They hurt, suck but it gets better.
To the few guys I know having surgery this week!
-the headache you get a couple days after the surgery because the anesthesia is leaving your body hurts 200 times more than the surgery itself. And even that isn’t too bad.
-after a week or, you ITCH. It’s awful. Try not to touch your stitches too much. An ice pack will help.
Keep pets off your bed for the first night. I almost had a panic attack when mu dog jumped on the bed.
Iron Man’s what he’s waiting for.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I think we should tell John about us. -SH
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You both like sherlock, sherstrade, and johnlock.
You: I think we should tell John about us. -SH
Stranger: Why? You've always said you wanted to keep this private. GL
You: I'm tired of it. SH While the secrecy might have had it's perk. -SH I don't know. I feel like one of our killer. SH
Stranger: You know I don't mind either way. GL
Stranger: I've never been "closeted". GL
You: I think I want to tell him. SH
You: Just. How? SH I mean, I can't just pull a banner in the living room with "I 'm in love with Lestrade" painted on it. SH
Stranger: I mean, at least he won't be able to misinterpret that. GL
Stranger: Lestrade's in love with you too, by the way, you git. GL
You: I'm not a git. -SH
Stranger: You are a bit. GL
You: If I were, I would have just let him caught out with out pants down .SH
Stranger: Alright, yeah, you're not the worst. GL Just... tell him we're together. GL
You: Lestrade, we are together. SH
You: You almost spent more time at out place that your own. SH
Stranger: I know! And he somehow hasn't caught on yet. So use your words. GL
You: I'm terrible at that. -SH
You: I'll probably blurt out something equally embarrassing and rude. -SH
Stranger: At least it'll be honest. GL
You: Like the first time I asked to make love. HS
Stranger: That wasn't rude, you were sweet. GL
You: I did my research, and you were right. NO one said carnal interaction anymore. SH
Stranger: You didn't believe me? I'm hurt. ;) GL
You: I did believed you. -SH
You: But I wanted the fact too. -SH YOu know how I work. SH
Stranger: Of course. GL
You: I'll write him a text. SH
Stranger: Of course. Let me know how it goes, yeah? GL
You: [delayed] I think I broke him .SH
Stranger: What happened? GL
You: I told him. SH
You: And I was kind!. -Sh
Stranger: Sherlock, what did you say? GL
You: I told him you and I were in a serious relationship. SH That that was highly satisfying both on the emotional level and the carnal one. SH
Stranger: Jesus. GL
Stranger: Well, he's probably pleased you're happy, but he probably didn't want or need to know about our sex life. GL
You: He's louder than we are! .-SH
You: We know about his sex life and we never complain HS
Stranger: Yes, but he didn't outright tell us. That's more a problem of proximity. GL
You: It's not really a problem. SH
Stranger: What, overhearing John have sex? GL
You: Yes. -SH I find more disturbing the music played by Turner's younger ones. -SH
Stranger: Yeah, God knows why they like it so loud. GL Is John okay, though? GL
You: I might have recovered the orange blanket. SH
Stranger: Ah. GL
You: Oh, and he want to talk to you. -SH
Stranger: Yeah? GL
You: He said he wanted to do a shovel talk. SH
You: Or some other figure of speech I can't be arsed to remember now. SH
Stranger: Most likely a shovel talk. GL
Stranger: You... did tell him how long we'd been together, right? GL
You: I might have forgotten to mention that. SH
You: But I told him I love how you drool on me when you're tired. SH
Stranger: Then he probably thinks we've just got together, and I need to be warned not to hurt you. GL
Stranger: ... Thanks, Sherl. GL
You: Not good? SH
Stranger: It's fine. A little embarrassing, but I'll live. GL
You: Oh. -SH
You: I think I'm going to sleep on the sofa tonight. SH
Stranger: What? Why? GL
You: I might have mentioned all the things I love about you. SH
Stranger: Why does that mean you're on the sofa? GL It's a little embarrassing that John now knows I drool when I'm tired, but hardly row-inducing. GL
You: I told him about your stuffie. -SH
Stranger: God, Sherlock. GL
You: I love you. SH
Stranger: I love you too, you git. GL
You: Again. Not a git. SH
You: I just wanted to show John that I love you. Even when you snores or when you fart. SH
You: It's just, I think I'd be lost without you. SH
Stranger: ... Come to my flat tonight. I can't promise to be quiet. GL
You: Okay. SH
You: Should I bring my bag too? Or am I just going to get insulted because I'm an ass' Sh
Stranger: Definitely bring your bag. No insults. I just want to show you how loved you are. GL
You: Oh, that I know. SH
Stranger: I know you like when I prove it, though, sunshine. GL
You: Oh, that kinds of show. SH
Stranger: Mhmm. GL
You: I told John how long we've been together. SH
You: He threw a cuppa at me. And then hug me. SH
You: I think we should find a therapist for him SH
Stranger: Oh, darlin'. GL
Stranger: He means well. GL
Stranger: Doesn't like being left out of the loop though. GL
You: I'm being evicted for the night it seems. SH
You: Do you know anyone who can host a poor temporary homeless World's only Consultant detective? SH
Stranger: I think I know a place you can go. GL
You: Really? SH
Stranger: Come over. I'll make you dinner. GL
You: What is with you all ?SH Always trying to make me eat. SH
Stranger: You forget to eat. GL
You: I eat. -SH
You: I had a toast today. SH
Stranger: Well done, love, but that's not enough to sustain you. I kind of like your body not-emaciated. GL
You: I'm not emaciated. SH
You: I'm just slim built , and my bones are really thin. -SH
Stranger: I know you're not. You will be, though, if you eat any less for any period of time. GL
You: Pasta. SH
You: With the red sauce. SH
Stranger: Yes, Your Highness. GL
You: It's not like I can cook you something, Greg. SH
You: I think I burned your kitchen last time HS
You: Or was it the one at 221B? - SH
Stranger: I'm not asking you to cook, love. Just to come and eat, and let me enjoy your company. GL I think it was your last flat, actually. That dodgy place. GL
You: Oh right. The crack house. SH
Stranger: Yeah. You might've even /improved/ the kitchen. GL
You: True. Sh
Stranger: I like 221B, but why don't we spend more time at my flat? GL
You: Because you hate your bed? SH
You: We really need to buy a new one. SH That thing will crash on us one of these days - SH
Stranger: You wanna go bed shopping like a couple of old marrieds? GL
You: No, I want to go bed shopping so my old lover won't wake up with back pains and complain about them all day. SH
Stranger: Wow, rude. I should arrest you for insubordination. GL
You: I'm not in your division SH
Stranger: You're always my division. ;) GL
You: Well, I love to work under you .SH
You: Or above you, or in front of you. -SH
Stranger: So you do. GL
You: Yes. SH
You: I just stated that. SH
Stranger has disconnected.
[Sherlock (19) came back to his table from the bathroom in the local cafe to find a number scribbled on his notes] Who's this and why is there a number on my notes? -SH
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You both like johnlock.
You: [Sherlock (19) came back to his table from the bathroom in the local cafe to find a number scribbled on his notes] Who's this and why is there a number on my notes? -SH
Stranger: I'm John. I wrote down my number cause you're cute and I want to talk to you. I mean I wanted to come sit with you properly but I had to get going so I just left my number instead. JW
You: Cute? -SH
You: You though I was cute and wanted to talk to me. SH Yeah, right. SH Id you're one of those fuckers from school, well, as you eloquently told me last time§: Piss off. -SH
Stranger: Er, what? JW Told you last time? What are you talking about? I just moved here a few days ago, I've never talked to you before. JW
You: Oh. -SH
You: Sorry, that was rude of me. SH But given that I was the target of some many jokes like that, one can never be too cautious. SH
Stranger: It's fine, I guess I can see why you'd be cautious in that case. JW But hey if I'm bothering you tell me. I don't want to make you uncomfortable or anything. JW
You: Given that I'm just wasting time working on my ash compendium I can say I have time to talk. -SH
Stranger: Ash compendium? What's that? JW
You: A project I'm working on. -SH I'm cataloguing various kind of asher for better recognissance if needed while investigating a murder. Sh
Stranger: Oh like an index. But really? For investigating murders? You seem a bit young for that. JW
You: Please, I've been working with the police since I was 12. -SH
Stranger: Seriously? Are you some kind of genius detective then? I mean the police don't exactly consult with amateurs. JW
You: they are the amateurs. -SH
Stranger: What makes you say that? JW
You: The fact that I solves case for them' SH
Stranger: You're that clever, huh? Alright, I'll bite. Tell me about some cases. JW
You: Triple murder. Three weeks ago. -SH
You: I pointed them in the right directions and they made the arrest. SH
You: Idiot never thought of not using a ladder with a very bad paint job. I found a chip on it on his trousers. -SH
You: And it could have only be deposited here if he used the ladder to climb up to the second floor and kill everyone. -SH
Stranger: So /you're/ the anonymous tip-off they were talking about in the papers? JW
Stranger: Wow. And you got all that from a paint chip of his trousers? JW
You: That was me. SH
Stranger: Incredible. And you do that all the time? JW
You: Yup. -SH
You: It's easy, evena a cow could do that. SH
You: You just need to observe, not just see. SH
You: Wait, you were Jumper Guy. -SH
Stranger: Sorry? JW
You: Triple espresso, no sugar, jam doughnuts, and that beige monstruosity of a jumper. SH
Stranger: Ah so you saw me. And hey, that beige monstrosity was knitted by my gran and it's my favorite thank you very much. JW
You: You also dropped the sweet on your girlfriend. -SH
You: The one with the blonde hair that kept teasing you about being too shy. -SH
Stranger: Girlfriend? Pft, you've got something wrong there. Clara's just my friend. JW
You: Girlfriend isn't a synonyme for important one. -SH
You: Given that she's lesbian and engaged. SH
Stranger: Yes. She's engaged to my sister. How did you know that? JW
You: Ring on her hand. Too small to be from a man. Too shiny to be just a family heirloom. And she kept touching your shoulder, not a part someone interest in man would do. SH
You: Woman aim for biceps, or the occasional touch to the lower back. SH
Stranger: You got all that just from us standing at the counter? That's really impressive. JW
You: It's my job, I told you -SH
Stranger: It's still pretty incredible. JW
You: You should see me at work then. -SH
You: In fact, I might need a doctor around. SH
Stranger: How did you know I'm a doctor? Well, not quite yet, I'm still a med student. JW
You: Triple expresso. -SH
You: No sugar it's onlt something a med stud will get, to try not to succumb to bad habits and an early onset of diabetes. SH Given that it's the end of the session students need a fix to be able to do an all nighters. SH
You: And yoor shoes. The scuff on them indicated someone who have to stand and sit quite a lot. I guess you work in a clinic as intern. -SH
Stranger: Spot on! Wow, must be quite the event to see you work. JW
You: Usually it's me complaining about Anderson's idiocy and solve the crime. SH
Stranger: Still. Cute and a total genius? I'd still love to see it. JW
You: ugh, that word again. -SH
You: I'm not cute. -SH Puppies are cute. SH Killes try to escape are cute. -SH
Stranger: You are cute. Very cute. JW What was that last bit? JW
You: Killers trying to flee are cute. -SH
You: Braining them with a pipe is nice. -SH
Stranger: Jesus. JW You're something else. JW
You: I do studied baritsu when I was young. -SH
Stranger: Isn't that supposed to be in self-defense? And don't you need like a cane or something? JW
You: Cane pipe. It's the same. -SH
Stranger: Ha, suppose so. That's brilliant. JW
You: I could teach you some if you want. -SH
Stranger: I think that'd be pretty great. JW
You: If you get hurt, I won't be responsible for that. SH
Stranger: Ah don't worry about me, I can take some hits. JW
You: Yeah, some. -SH
You: But the human bosy isn't made for sustaining continuous attack. -SH
Stranger: Yeah, don't I know it. Trust me, I realized that after rugby and training. JW
You: Broken legs? -SH
Stranger: Yep. Can you tell what else? JW
You: Nose, five cracked ribs, and a limp. -SH
You: Which is psychosomatic. -SH
Stranger: Spot on again. I don't think that'll ever get old. JW
You: Well, if you want to die soon I heard they might be looking for doctor in the RAMF. -SH
Stranger: Mm, don't think I haven't considered that. My Da was in the army, he keeps trying to get me to recruit. JW
You: I don't think I'd like to know you die in some godforgotten land. -SH
Stranger: Oh? Does that mean you care? JW
You: Caring is a liability. -SH
You: Let's say I'm concerned I might loose a valuable asset. SH
Stranger: Aw, you do care then. JW
You: Not really. -SH
Stranger: Close enough. I'll still take it. JW
You: You're so confident, John Watson. -SH
Stranger: Woah, when did you get my last name? I still don't even have your first! JW
You: Sherlock Holmes -SH
You: And it was easy, I just had to hack into the Uni logs and look out for any John, med student who was in the rugby team SH
Stranger: Huh. Fancy name for a posh thing like you. It's nice. JW You hacked into the Uni logs just to find me? JW
You: Yes, Just to find you. -SH
You: And my name is not Posh. -SH
You: Nor am I. SH
Stranger: Oi, the shirt you were wearing probably costs more than my entire wardrobe. You're plenty posh. JW
You: It's just 15£. -SH
You: You must wear really poor thing to have it cose less than my shirt. SH
Stranger: Pft well it looked really expensive. Either way you're still posh. JW
You: God, just because I like to dress with style and comfort both in mind I'm deemed posh? SH
Stranger: Little bit, yeah. At least to us commoners. JW
You: You're far from being a commoner, John. SH
Stranger: Ha! With a name like John? Not really. I'm plenty average and I'm perfectly fine with it. JW
You: If you really want to believe that lie, John. -SH
Stranger: What lie? There's no lie. JW
You: You think you're average. That's the lie. -SH
You: Or if you preferer pop culture reference, I could quote the "Cake is a lie" quote. Sh
You: Whatever that mena. -SH
Stranger: You've never played Portal have you? JW Nevermind. JW
You: PLayed what? SH
You: as far as I know quantum physics are still far from opening portal around. SH
Stranger: God, you're hilarious. JW
You: That was not a humurous sentence. -Sh I just stated a fact. SH
Stranger: It's still funny to me. JW
You: I've been told I have no sense of humor. SH
Stranger: Sure you do. I mean you said you think braining criminals is fun. That's humor right there, though it's more dark than most people like. JW
You: Actually it's really funny. In a sadistic way, but still funny. -SH
Stranger: Exactly, see? JW
You: I still fail to see the humor in that. SH
Stranger: It's more funny to me than you I suppose. Just because you're aware of 'pop culture references' and are using them correctly, mostly, but you still have no idea what it means. JW
You: I looked it up on the net. -SH
You: I though that maybe if I spoke a bit less "common" you'd like me. -SH
Stranger: You looked it up just so I'd like you? JW
You: Yes. -SH Isn't that how social cues work? -Sh You say something so people like you? SH
Stranger: Well, it's more like 'Say something you think is funny and hope they laugh'. JW Hopefully the thing about people liking you is that they like YOU and not something you said. You know? JW
You: NOt really. SH I'm awful at taking social cues. -Sh
You: I'm terrible at socializing, full stop. -Sh
Stranger: I think you're doing just fine with me. I mean I like you plenty already. JW
You: Oh. -SH
Stranger: Hope that's alright. JW
You: it is. Sh I might have failed to realize you felt already emotionally attached to me. SH
Stranger: Oh yes a terrible oversight on your part. :) JW
You: I'm always missing some detalis. -SH
You: Stupid, stupid,stupid. SH
Stranger: Oh come on it's only natural. JW
You: What's natural? SH
You: ME missing things because I overlook them' Sh
Stranger: Well yeah. No one can understand everything at first glance. You can come close though. JW
You: Well, there's still Room for improvement, I'm just 19. -SH
Stranger: Then at this rate I'm sure you'll surpass all expectations without a hitch. JW
You: Funny. -SH
You: Do you happen to know a cop' Greying hainr, Not so idiotic as it would see at first glance. -SH
You: NAme's Ghunter? or something with a G. SH
Stranger: Sherlock, do you honestly think I would know any cops? JW
Stranger: And why anyway? JW
You: Because he just sat at my table and threaten me to destroy me if I hurt John Watson's heart. SH
You: Given that you're the only John watson I know, I thought you knew him. -SH
Stranger: Oh! Oh wait you mean Greg! Yeah I know him, I used to babysit his kid. I just almost never see him in uniform so I don't usually think of him as a cop. JW
You: He's not an idiot. SH
Stranger: Yeah I knew that. JW
You: I mean, he is, because how can one not notice that a girl was scammed behind his back is a n idiot. SH
You: But not the average idiot. SH
Stranger: Well he's got you there to show him to be more clever, right? JW
You: I did that. SH
You: He called me a meddling menace. And he had the nerve to say I'm a kid. SH
Stranger: He's not wrong. Actually, come to think of it, I've heard him talk about you before. 'Some nosy kid came in today and showed us up' is what he usually says. He's impressed by you though, don't worry. JW
You: I'm not nosy. -SH
You: It's not my fault they couldn't even find their own prick without detailed instruction and a map. -SH
Stranger: Please tell me you haven't said that to his face. Let me be there when you do, it'll be priceless. JW
You: I can show you the CCTV of the whole yard when I told them last friday. SH
Stranger: Oh god yes, please! Christ they must have been pissed! JW
You: [Attached video: Sherlockdotrynottopissoff theyerderstoomuch.lovemycroft.mp4 ]
You: Just ignore the name of the file. My brother is a sentimental idiot. SH
Stranger: This is a treasure. I am so keeping this. JW You're brother's got a sense of humor too. And a posh name like yours. Must have been hard to fingerpaint those in kinder. JW How did you CCTV footage anyway? JW
You: My brother have a minor position in the Government. -SH
You: Actually you might look out for a sleazy guy with a suit and an umbrella. SH
You: If he ask you to spy on me and give you money for it, get them. We might split. SH
Stranger: Are you saying your brother's going to bribe me to spy on you? The hell kind of extremism is that? JW
You: Brothery love, HOlmes Style, I guess. SH
You: I think he's a bother, but still. SH
You: ah, he might kidnap to do so, just to warn you .SH
Stranger: [delayed] Your warning came just a little late. JW
You: Sorry. -Sh
You: Is that what one should say if a brother kidnapp a possible love interest? SH
Stranger: I don't know, I've never exactly been in this position before. JW Also your brother says you should stop texting me so he can intimidate me properly. JW
You: Tell him to shut up or I'll tell mummy about the thing. -SH
Stranger: He said he'll tell her about the other two things if you do. JW You know, this isn't exactly working. He's not very intimidating. JW
You: Mention Bluebell to him. -SH Tell him you know about Bluie. SH
You: And that I might use said rabbit for my experiment. -SH
You: And tell Mum he kissed the Woman.SH
Stranger: Wow you two have a ton of blackmail on each other. JW
You: we're brother. What else did you expected? SH
Stranger: I don't know, maybe less blackmail? I don't use it against Harry. JW Then again, things are different between twins I guess. JW Oi, can I go now? I need to be back at the clinic in half an hour. JW
You: Twins? SH
You: Mycroft id 5 years older than me. -SH
Stranger: I think I've figured it out actually. JW
You: Oh, You have a twin Brother then. -SH
You: And a sister who's getting engaged. SH
Stranger: You're both terribly overdramatic. JW I don't have a twin brother. JW
You: I'm not overdramatic. -SH
You: (To John) [picture attached. A cctv still of Sherlock Pouting] We might believe that, Sherly. -MH
Stranger: Oh that's adorable. JW
You: What's adorable? SH
Stranger: That little pout you've got on right now. It's incredibly endearing. JW
You: I'm not pouting, John. -SH
You: Your imagination is going rampant it seems. SH
Stranger: Nope. Mycroft just sent me a picture over CCTV. Caught you red-handed. JW Or should I say red-faced? Cause your cheeks are pink too and that's just as cute. JW
You: JOhn, I might delay our conversation a little bit. I'm in dire need to call my mother now -SH
Stranger: You Holmes' are ridiculous. JW
You: Such a petty kid, my brother is. -MH
You: And we're not ridiculous, Doctor Watson. MH
You: Sherlock is under the illusion Mother do not know what happen in our life. -MH
Stranger: Still he's sweet. JW Yes you are. Your mother must put up with a lot. And it's not quite Doctor yet but I'm getting there. JW
You: With your mark and Sherlock tutorship in Chemistry you'll ace all of your exams. MH
Stranger: How'd you know I need help in Chem? JW No, wait. You hacked into the Uni logs, right? JW
You: Obviously. -MH
You: I have a folder on my lap with all your life printed on it. -MH
You: Child prodigy, but also a rugby player. MH How average. MH
Stranger: That isn't creepy at all. JW
You: Not really. -MH
You: Creepy would be knowing what you did with Mary in the Lab room, on your first day of college. MH
You: It was a sensible thing to stop because you ha no condom. MH I like that, .MH
Stranger: Okay that's enough thank you. JW
You: I'll let Sherly steam off a bit. You might want to check patient number three at the clinic. -MH
You: She's faking it just so you could touch her bosom. -MH
Stranger: Dammit, I knew she was fine. JW Are you done now? JW
You: Yes. I took the liberty to esconse this little chat from Sherly's graps, if you don't mind. -MH Also, please be careful with him. -MH He won't tell you, but he's really an amateur with romantic relationship. -MH
Stranger: You know I kind of figured that out for myself thanks. JW But yeah. I'll be careful. JW
You: Good day then, Doctor watson. -MH
Stranger: See you around, Mycroft. JW
You: Let's hope not. -MH
You: Call with Mum done. -SH
You: How's the clinic? You should be there, I think. -SH
Stranger: Yeah, Mycroft got his goons to drop me off. Much nicer this time around, that's for sure. I was in the boot earlier. JW
You: In the.. For god's sake. He's a beast. -Sh
You: See if I help him next time the prime minister misplase his stupid dog. SH
Stranger: Sherlock, I'm kidding. JW
You: Still not too fond of looking for dogs. SH
You: Last time the idiot left it at his mistress's place and asked me to locate him. -SH
Stranger: Oh that's pretty sad. JW
You: Stupid, not sad. -SH
Stranger: By sad I mean pathetic. JW
You: I mean you have the wits to keep up a relationship with another woman while being married to another and you forgot the dog? SH
You: I mena, how much more idiot you can get? SH
Stranger: Ha, I'm sure there's plenty more. JW Listen I gotta make my rounds now. I'm here for a few hours, so maybe I could text you later? JW
You: Definitely. SH Yes, yes, yes. -Sh
You: Sorry, I might be a bit eager to hear again from you. -SH
Stranger: Oh don't apologize, I'm glad for it. JW
You: Thanks. -SH
Stranger: Till later then, Sherlock. Have fun with your ash catalogue. :) JW
You: oh right, the ash. -SH I'll get back to study them. _SH
You: Now. SH
Stranger: Yep. Still cute. JW
You: Go work. -SH
You: Patien three is faking it though. -Sh
You: She just want to ask you out. -SH
Stranger: Alright alright I'll send her on her way. JW Bye now JW
You: Don't wanna. -SH
Stranger: Just for now. Later, remember? But I really do have to go, Sarah's started shouting again. JW
You: OKay. -SH
You: I'll go brain some criminals. -SH
Stranger: You're incredible. Turning my phone off now. JW
You: {delayed] You do know how to patch up injuries righT? _sh
Stranger: Yeah of course. Why? JW
You: I might have incurred in one while braining criminals. SH
You: It seems I have to learn ho to roll a bit better. SH
Stranger: What the hell happened? JW
You: I tried to roll out of a slashing with a knife but I was a bit too slow. SH
You: Got me on the flank. -SH
You: But it's just a flesh wound, not too deep but still need stitches. SH
Stranger: Jesus. Can you come by the clinic or should I go to you? JW
You: I can walk, John. SH
You: As I said, it's just a flesh wound. -SH
You: it's more toward my back, otherwise I'd have stitched it myself. -SH
Stranger: Is this a normal thing? Stitching yourself up on your own? JW
You: Yes. -SH
Stranger: That's worrying. JW
You: Why? SH
Stranger: What if you're actually hurt? Please tell you go to the hospital when something serious happens. JW
You: Last time I was at teh hospital was because I ODed. -SH
Stranger: ODed? Really? JW
You: I might have been addicted to cocaine for a little bit. -SH
Stranger: You? I'm not sure I believe that. JW
You: I was, John. -SH
You: NOt i'm just addicted to nicotine patches. SH
Stranger: Why did you use cocaine? JW
You: I was bored. SH
You: And mostly was because I culdn't shut down everything. -SH
You: I kept seeing thng, I had no momento fo respite. SH
Stranger: Shut down everything? You mean like sensory overload? JW
You: Yes. -SH
You: I kept gathering data, and they all just clutter up. It was like I had a white noise, a costant white noise I couldn't utne out. SH
Stranger: That must be maddening. JW
You: Cocaine was the only thing that shut down my brain for a while. SH
Stranger: Christ. Even with a reason like that it's not good for you. I'm glad you're over that. JW
You: I learned how to cope better with that. SH
You: It's a bit embarrassing how I picture the coping mechanism but it works. SH
Stranger: If it works it can't be so bad. JW
You: It's a toilet. SH
Stranger: Alright it's a little embarrassing. JW
You: It works. SH
You: I though about a trashing compactor, but it was impossible. HS
You: I can be more selective with the toilet. SH
Stranger: That's true. JW
You: I think I stepped on something. SH Anyway I'm outside the clinic. HS
You: You'll recognize me, I'll be the one glaring at his own shoe. SH
Stranger: Oh please, like i could ever forget you. I'm coming down now. JW
You: Sherlock was seated on the step of the clinic, analysing his shoe and the weird substance he stepped on.
You: He was sure it was of organic matter but only thing that might get him sure of that would be a test check. He brought the sdhoese closer to his face.
Stranger: John stepped out and raised an eyebrow at what Sherlock was doing, half-amused and half-worried. "Don't lick it." He warned automatically, sure that the strange boy would certainly do it.
You: "only way to discern if it's organic, John. Unless you ha ve a microscope I can borrow" he said, totally invested in the shoe , and ignoring the cute doctor who came to his rescue.
Stranger: "We have a lab, you know." He snorted, tapping his shoulder. "Come on then. Let's go inside and I'll patch you up, alright?" He smiled, trying to get his attention.
You: Sherlock looked around, taking in his surrounding and finding himself in fron of the clinic. "RIght, the wound, I came here so you could look at it". He stood up and on a whim took John's Arm under his and smiling asked him "Show me the way"
Stranger has disconnected.
Mary stopped by today. She wasn't alone... -SH(22. John's older and is divorced from Mary but they have a child. Sherlock and John are exclusive but Sherlock hadn't met Mary or the child until that day.)
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You both like unilock, johnlock, sherlock, parentlock, and kidlock.
Stranger: Mary stopped by today. She wasn't alone... -SH(22. John's older and is divorced from Mary but they have a child. Sherlock and John are exclusive but Sherlock hadn't met Mary or the child until that day.)
You: So she finally met someone? JW (32)
Stranger: She finally did. Yes. -SH
You: That's a good thing. -JW But there's more, isn't there? JW
Stranger: No, no I was just very surprised and caught off guard. -SH
You: Was she kind? -JW Please tell me I don't have to yell at my ex-wife because she was rudee to you. -JW
Stranger: No but the small person she brought with her was really quite shocked at finding a half naked man in your flat. -SH
You: You meet Hamish. -JW Shit, i didn't plan it to go that way. -JW
Stranger: No I assume not. He had no idea I existed, which was quite insulting in itself. -SH
You: I'm sorry, love. -JW MAry though it was better not to mention that I has a heathen who'll rot in hell because I have a boyfriend. -JW
Stranger: Christ, she thinks like that? That's awful. -SH Oh and yes. She was rude. Very much so. -SH
You: I'm ging to kill her. -JW
You: Okay, not literally kill her, because I don't look good in orange, but there will be a lot of yelling involved. -JW
Stranger: I don't know, you could kill her, I could frame it as a suicide. -SH
You: Love, no illegal thing before noon. JW
You: And let's not plan my ex-wife's murder. greg would not like it a bit. -JW
Stranger: How dull. -SH Really, she looked me up and down as if I was rubbish. I understand I was only in my pants but really, she just let herself in. -SH
You: She's not supposed to have the keys to my flat. JW Sicne I left the the house. JW
You: And the car. -JW
Stranger: And the child. -SH
You: Even the bloody garden chair. -JW
Stranger: Your child has very sticky hands by the way. -SH
You: What? _JW
You: In which sense? IN the "!sticky because he touched ajm" or the "sticky because he stole something?" kinf of sticky? _JW
Stranger: Sticky like he'd had his hands in sweets for hours. Awfully sticky. -SH
You: Oh lord. -JW She know I hate when he eats too many sweets. It's not good for his health. -JW
Stranger: Always the doctor. -SH
You: Not the doctor, the father. -JW
Stranger: Father. Right. Of course. -SH
You: Lord, I didn't want you to meet Hame with that witch around. -JW
Stranger: She really is a witch. He wanted to talk to me and she wouldn't let him. I wasn't bothered but I knew you'd be if you found out. -SH
You: Kill her, definitely kill her. -JW
You: HAme was in good shape? -JW
You: I haven't seen him much lately. -JW
You: And before you start the guilt conga, it's not because of you. -JW I mean, not because i spend time with you. JW
Stranger: I don't know, he looked a bit grubby. Behind the ears, under the jaw, places people don't wash properly. -SH
Stranger: It better bloody not be. -SH
You: You'd hate me if I say I miss him? JW
Stranger: No. I wouldn't. It's understandable from a logical stand point. -SH
You: And from an emotional stand? -JW
Stranger: I don't want to be the reason you miss out on seeing your offspring. -SH Perhaps you should go to a solicitor to organise a fairer custody plan. I've slept here for a /minimum/ of five nights a week for almost three months and I've not seen him once. That makes the times you see him a very,very low number. -SH
Stranger: I don't do emotional stands. -SH
You: Just for me? -JW please? -JW
You: I know it's selfish, but I want the two of you in my life. -JW
Stranger: Just for you, what? -SH
Stranger: I've suggested to try and gain more custody, that's supportive, I think. -SH
You: Sherlock, I want to know what you really think of this. -JW
Stranger: I think it's terrible you don't see him anywhere near as much as you should do because it's making you upset and I don't want you to be upset. -SH
You: I saw him last Christmas. -JW
Stranger: What? -SH
You: And then she started to, you know, start making up appointment that casually end up being on my visiting day. -JW
Stranger: That's absolutely ridiculous. She's withholding visitation rights because you dare to have a sexual relationship with a man? That's absolutely against the law. You could really sue her for that. -SH
You: Sadly I don't have money to pay for a lawyer. -JW
Stranger: Really John, you could. She's manipulative, you could definitely use that to make her seem an unfit mother and you could gain majority custody rights. -SH
Stranger: I could defend you a court of law. I'm definitely intelligent enough. -SH
You: But you haven't took a bar exam, love. JW I know you're smart. -JW
You: But without passing the bar, you can't defend me. -JW Even if I really appreciate the thought. -JW
Stranger: Right well I could tell you exactly what to say and you could represent yourself. That's allowed. -SH
You: If I don't get anxiety attack .JW Or worse. -JW
Stranger: This is entirely unfair though. -SH
You: She defined me us unfit cause I had a bit of PTSD episode. JW
You: You saw me when I have nightmares. JW
Stranger: Well she's a manipulative woman who uses her child as leverage for personal punishments. -SH
Stranger: Yes, I have, but he's not going to see that. How old is he? -SH
You: Hame? Three. -JW Four in seven weeks. -JW
Stranger: I really want you to do something about this. -SH
You: I'm sure he'll try to steal you from he. He loves science too. -JW
You: me*
Stranger: Really? -SH
You: Yeah. -JW
You: I remember him being one and half, and buggering me to do a bubbly volcano with vine. -JW
Stranger: You need to challenge this. -SH
Stranger: You absolutely have to. -SH
You: Challeng a bubbly vulcano made with soda and vinegar? JW
Stranger: Challenge not seeing your son. -SH
You: Right, that's me being the usual idiot. JW Sorry. JW
You: But, how? JW
You: I was stated unfit because of that fucking PTSD. -JW
Stranger: I could write a letter from a 'solicitor'. Scare her into thinking she's in trouble. -SH
You: Or I can go beg Harry into lending me some money. -JW
Stranger: Actually, she is in trouble. She's violated your divorce agreement. -SH
Stranger: Or that yes. -SH
You: You know she'll want us at her place at least once per month as repayment, right? -JW
Stranger: Us? -SH
You: And you can't stand her. -JW Hell, even I can't stand her most of the times, and she's my sister. -JW
Stranger: Harry? -SH
Stranger: Why? -SH
Stranger: Why, John? -SH
You: Because I don't know who else can lend me money for a lawyer. -JW
Stranger: Oh. Oh, I can. -SH
You: Sherlock I love you. JW But I won't send you bankrupted because of this. -JW
Stranger: You wouldn't. I have a sizable amount in savings. -SH
You: Since when? -JW
You: Did they finally paid you for your consulting thing? JW
Stranger: My family is really rather wealthy. -SH
Stranger: I've never mentioned it. -SH
You: What? -JW
Stranger: I didn't think it was important. -SH
Stranger: You know I went to private school, all of my university was paid for directly, my flat is paid for. -SH
You: Love, please tell me you're not related to a Mycroft. -JW
Stranger: Of course I am. -SH
You: He's your father, isn't he? -JW
You: O fucking hell, i 've punched your father. -JW
Stranger: Brother. When did you punch Mycroft?!-SH
You: Three month ago. -JW
You: THere was this idiot with an umbrella who couldn't take a no for answer, I got mad and I punched him. -JW
You: I think I broke his nose. -JW
You: The day I got home really late, and really mad. -JW
Stranger: Wouldn't take no for an answer in response to what, exactly? -SH
Stranger: Ah yes I remember. -SH
You: He offered me monet to spy on his little brother, whose name he didn't give me. -JW
You: And I said no. Quite a lot. -JW
Stranger: Ah. Shame, you should have said yes. -SH
You: What? -JW
Stranger: He's very protective over me but we won't go into that. -SH
Stranger: We could have split it, John. -SH
You: You're nuts. -JW
You: And I love you. -JW
Stranger: I love you too. Please excuse Mycroft. He's been like this since my late teens. He's incredibly involved, constantly checking up on me. -SH
You: I hope he mean well. -JW
Stranger: He does. I suppose he has reason to. -SH
You: But still, it's really annoying to be kidnapped in the middle of the grocers. -JW
Stranger: oh I can imagine. -SH
You: He's MI:6? Or Mob? -JW
You: Or from an alphabet soup agency? -JW
You: Because he have those superspy vibes. JW
Stranger: He's neither. He's slowly becoming the entirety of the british government and yet he seems to only be bothered about his little brother. -SH
You: What te heck? -JW
You: I punched the british Government? JW
Stranger: You punched my overbearing brother. -SH
Stranger: Let's just change the subject. -SH
You: I still need a lwyer. JW
You: Lawyer. -JW stupid phone with his tiny tiny keys. -JW
Stranger: As I said, large amount of money in savings. -SH Though I'm not allowed access to it directly...-SH
You: Is the reason related to that part of your life you refuse to tell me? JW
Stranger: Might be. -SH
You: It's a yes, then. -JW
You: You think that if you explain to them the reason you need the money might help? JW
Stranger: Yes. Though I won't be believed because I've tricked them before. You'll have to do it. -SH
Stranger: Does it bother you that I have things I haven't told you? -SH
You: Meeting the parents. -JW
You: Frightnening.. -JW
Stranger: Ah-ah, wrong again. Meeting the Mycroft. He's in charge of my finances. -SH
You: Oh, we're doomed then. -JW
Stranger: He'll know you're not lying instantly. It'll go fine. -SH
You: And no. I'm not bothered by the fact you have your secrets. JW
Stranger: Thank you for respecting my privacy. I just don't want anything to upset your perception of me. -SH
You: Sherlock, I'd love you even if you were a pidgen. -JW
You: I don't care about your past. It's what made you in the wonderful person I love today. -JW
Stranger: That's incredibly sweet. -SH I wasn't a pidgen, by the way. -SH
You: I don't even know what a pidgen is. JW
You: I wanted to write pidgeon. JW
Stranger: A bird, you idiot. -SH
Stranger: Ah I see. -SH
Stranger: Well, I wasn't either. -SH
You: Well, who know, maybe in a different life. -JW
You: NO, in a different life you were a cat. -JW
You: Of that I0m sure. JW
Stranger: oh I absolutely was. -SH
You: Lazy bugger. -JW
Stranger: I'm a human cat, yes, we all recognize that. -SH
Stranger: (Delayed) John, if I told you what I've been not telling you, then you might be a little bit less eager to have me around your son. -SH
You: Just tell me. -JW
You: And then we'll think about it. -JW
You: Together. JW
Stranger: Well I was very bored, very intelligent, disposable income. -SH In short, I had a rather bad drug habit. -SH
You: I saw the track marks. -JW
Stranger: ah, well, there you are then. -SH
You: Doctor here, remember? _JW
Stranger: Of course. -SH
You: Well, you're not anymore, so why would I care? JW
Stranger: Mycroft cut off my allowance to try and stop me, I befriended some questionable people to get drugs, I went to rehab. Now I'm all better. -SH
You: My question stand still. You're not anymore. Why would I care? -JW
Stranger: I don't know. People can be funny. -SH
Stranger: I love you, John. -SH
You: Love you too. -JW
You: So, do I have to dress up? _JW
Stranger: God no. -SH
You: To meet Mycroft, aka the British Government. -JW
Stranger: Absolutely not. -SH
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This is a birthday gift for anotherwellkeptsecret, because Kelley is one of the sweetest people in the fandom and also crazy talented and just lovely <3 <3 <3
and ALSO a gift for beautifulfic and The Gilded Cage, which is now finished and oh my god <3 <3 <3
One day, Sherlock met Billy the jigsaw
http://logs.omegle.com/24c68f6
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You both like johnlock.
Stranger: [Post TSoT, Sherlock left London just after the wedding, and only texted John once stating that he wasn't in danger, it's been two months since then] I'll be in 221B briefly this evening. SH
You: Sherlock! -JW Thanks gos. You okay? JW
Stranger: I am fine. I told you I wasn't in danger. SH
You: Two month ago. -JW
Stranger: It pertained to my entire absence. SH
You: And how could I have known that since that's the first time I heard from you in TWO FUCKING MONTH? -JW
Stranger: I can take care of myself, John. You have a life to attend to anyway. SH
You: Oh, ight. My so called life. -JW
Stranger: What do you mean? SH
You: Troubles in paradise, as they say. -JW
Stranger: What's wrong, John? SH
You: Everything is wrong it seems. JW
Stranger: How so? SH
You: Mary. -JW
You: It seems I am not as exciting as I was before the wedding. JW It seems even the way i breathe is boring or wornog. JW
You: Wrong*
Stranger: Nothing you do is boring, or wrong. She is the one incorrect. SH
You: I don't know, Sherlock. -JW
Stranger: What is it that you don't know? SH
You: I feel like something is missing now. -JW What if she's right? JW
Stranger: She isn't right. Not about this. SH
You: God, I'm going to divorce, am I wrong? JW
Stranger: Yes. You are wrong. You love each other. I vowed to be there for the three of you. I will not allow you to be torn apart because of this. SH
You: [delayed] It's because she's not you. -JW
Stranger: What? SH
You: She's not you, Sherlock. -JW That's the problem. HS
Stranger: You don't want me in her place though, John. You chose her. SH
You: Because you weren't there. JW
Stranger: No. SH
Stranger: You are happy with her. SH
You: I am not. -JW I've never been. JW
Stranger: You want a family. SH
You: I prefer having no family, but feel happy with myself. JW
You: I wouldn't inflict me as I am now to a child. -JW
Stranger: You would not want me as a partner, regardless. SH
You: Why? JW Why are you so sure I won't love having you as my partner. -JW
Stranger: Because nobody else has. JW
Stranger: *SH
You: I'm not everyone, Sherlock. -JW
You: And I do love you. -JW
Stranger: [Delayed] You what? SH
You: I love you, you idiot. -JW
Stranger: I don't believe you. SH
You: Tell me a way to prove it to you, then. -JW I'll do it. JW
Stranger: No. Don't. SH
You: Why? JW
You: And give me a good reaason. -JW
Stranger: I don't deserve you. SH
You: God, you're an idiot. -JW
Stranger: You deserve better than me, anyway. SH
You: I don't give a single fuck about who I deserve. -JW I love you. -JW And love isn't about being worth. -JW
You: It's about wanting to sacrifice yourself so the other one is happy. -JW
Stranger: That's what I'm doing, John. SH
You: and you're my happiness. -JW
Stranger: No. I caused you so much pain. That's impossible. SH
You: I want you. -JW And all the pain you've caused me. -JW
You: Because the happines you gave me, surpass that. -JW
Stranger: [Delayed] I love you too. SH
You: Think I can come home? JW
Stranger: You can, if I can. SH
You: 221B is your home, Sherlock. -JW
Stranger: There have been times when it hasn't been. I thought now was one of those times. SH
You: Idiot. -JW
Stranger: It's miserable without you. SH
Stranger: I am miserable without you. SH
You: Come home, love. -JW
Stranger: May I? SH
You: Mine was not a question, Sherlock. -JW
Stranger: Good. I missed you. SH
You: I missed you too, Sherlock. -JW
Stranger: You shouldn't. SH
You: Oi! We've already been overr that. -JW
Stranger: No, we haven't. SH
You: Yes, we have. -JW I do miss you, because I love you -JW
Stranger: You have nothing to miss. SH
You: Right, because the Sherlock shaped hole I feel next to me does not exist. JW Right. JW
Stranger: You have one too? SH
Stranger: A hole where I should be? SH
You: Yup, saexy. -JW
Stranger: Dear lord, John. That is not what I meant. SH
You: Okay, some things never change. You neveg get my jokes. -JW
Stranger: I suppose I should've seen it coming. SH
You: Nah. -JW
You: You'll never learn. JW
Stranger: I'm fine with keeping it that way. SH
You: God, it's going to be head in the fridge again, isn't that? JW
You: And mold in my tub. -JW
Stranger: The flat is clean at the moment. I haven't completed an experiment in weeks, and I've been away. SH
You: Better get a picture of that. -JW It's not going to last. -JW
Stranger: I won't be staying. SH
You: Why? -JW
Stranger: Most of my things are still in France. SH
You: Then I'll come with you to get them. -JW
You: I need a vacation, after all. JW
Stranger: You're married. SH
You: I want a divorce. -JW
Stranger: You both deserve better than an affair before you even discuss it. SH
You: Don't need to. -JW
Stranger: What do you mean? SH
You: It seems I've been ditched for... ugh.. Cavanaught. -JW
Stranger: Cavanaught? SH
You: Mousy idiot that lived down the street. -JW An Anderson lookalike. JW
Stranger: Ah. SH
Stranger: And the baby? SH
You: I don't really know, Sherlock. -JW
Stranger: As long as you're okay in the end, John. You have to be okay in the end. SH
You: I would love to have my baby, Sherlock. But only if you want her too. .-SH
You: JW*
Stranger: Of course. I'd want nothing more. SH
You: You sure? JW
Stranger: Of course I am. SH
You: Then I'll find te best lawyer my paycheck can find, and we'll fight her for custody. -JW
Stranger: That isn't needed. Mycroft will handle it. SH
You: Mycroft? -JW But he isn't a lawyer. SH
You: JW*
Stranger: We have a family lawyer, who he can contact, or he can do the paperwork himself. SH
You: Is there anything Mycroft can't manage? JW Or obtain? Or Do? JW
You: Your brother scares me sometimes. JW
Stranger: I told you before, he /is/ the British government. It's his job to scare people. SH
You: I thought it was his job to keep you from getting into too many troubles. -JW
Stranger: He's rubbish at it. You're much better. SH
You: Because I have ulterior motives for doing it. -JW
Stranger: Like what? SH
You: Like because I love you,. -JW
Stranger: Has that always been it? SH
You: [delayed] yeah. -J
Stranger: Fantastic. SH
You: in a good way ot a bad one? JW
Stranger: It could be considered both. SH
You: Why? -JW
Stranger: We've both been in love with each other this entire time, John. SH
You: We're idiots. -JW
You: But think about it, we've lot of time to make up with each other. -JW
Stranger: Exactly. I enjoy thinking about the latter. SH
You: Well, I'll start looking for old cottages, then. -JW
Stranger: There's no need. We own one in France. SH
You: Not in Sussex, Sherlock. -JW
You: Are there any apiary? JW
Stranger: I believe at the moment there are six individual hives there, yes. SH
You: So we're going to live in France once we'll retire. -JW
You: Well, I have time to learn French then. -JW
Stranger: I can teach you, if you'd like. SH
You: Right. JW
You: Before or after I tear your clothes away and ravish you? JW
Stranger: I could do it during, John. SH
You: I'm never going to learn a thing that way. JW
Stranger: I think you'd be surprised. SH
You: Only you could make sex a learning experience. JW
Stranger: Does it surprise you? SH
You: Not really. .JW
Stranger: Good. SH
Stranger: I should've come back sooner. SH
You: Yeah, you should have. -JW
You: But it's normal for us to be that stupid, so. JW
Stranger: I was extraordinarily dumb, John. SH
Stranger: I was scared to come back. SH
You: And now you're here. -JW That's what matter. JW
You: You're back, and you're mine. JW
Stranger: I've always wanted you to call me that. SH
You: MIne? JW
Stranger: Yes. I want to be yours. SH
You: Love you, my idiot. JW
Stranger: I love you too, my John. SH
Stranger: I find it difficult to think of a pet name for you. SH
You: Because you're not used to them. -JW
Stranger: No, I'm plenty used to them, but none of them fit you. SH
You: Well, try some. If I start laugh, I'll tell you. -JW
You: Does that mean I'm allowed to call you, I don't know? My Pufflekins? -SH
You: JW*
Stranger: Pufflekins? Really? SH
Stranger: I quite like darling. For the both of us. SH
You: Pufflekins was the most outrageous I could think of. -JW
Stranger: I could call you Johnnie-poo. SH
You: If I can call you Sherly-poo. -JW
You: God, if Lestrade hear us calling each other like that, he'll get hysterical -JW
Stranger: The whole Yard would be on the floor laughing. SH
You: And get us checked at the nearest mental health clinic. Booboo. -JW
Stranger: Lestrade would have Mycroft on the phone in seconds. Booboo is almost as bad as Sherly. Cuddlemuffins. SH
You: Of course. Sugarpie. -JW
You: And I still haven't used my favorite yet. -JW
Stranger: I feel like I should be scared. SH
You: ANh, you've heard it before. -JW
Stranger: Have I? SH
You: Yeah. -JW
Stranger: I probably deleted it. SH
You: Smartarse. JW
Stranger: I hardly see how that qualifies as a pet name. SH
You: It was an insult, Sherlock. JW
You: Not a pet name. JW
Stranger: That was my attempt at retaliation. Humour is not my strong suit. SH
You: Sunshine. JW
Stranger: My sweet. SH
You: Not good? JW
Stranger: Perfect, as long as we're not in public. SH
You: Right. BEcause we don't need to kill the Yard with laughters. JW
Stranger: No, we don't. SH
You: Where are you now? JW
You: BEcause I suddenly have this urge to kiss you. -J
Stranger: I'm still in Lille, I'll be leaving soon. As soon as I get there, John. SH
You: Should I wait for you at the airport? -JW
Stranger: I would love it if you did. SH
You: Can we spare each other the rom-com rush to kiss you?JW
You: That's too clichey even for us. -JW
Stranger: Of course. I agree. SH
You: But we'll do it anyway, won't we? -JW
Stranger: I don't doubt it. SH
You: I love you, Sherlock. -JW
Stranger: I love you too, John. SH
You: Hoe long before I finally get to kiss you? JW
Stranger: About an hour. SH
You: Too much. -JW
Stranger: We've waited so long already. This should be considered minimal. SH
You: Shit. JW
You: I forgot Glad at home. JW
Stranger: Glad? SH
You: Dog. -JW
Stranger: Oh. Of course. SH
You: Though about calling him Sherlock, but he's too stupid. -JW
Stranger: I don't know how I would've felt about that. SH
You: To share a name with something that crash into closed doors? JW
Stranger: To share a name with anyone, actually. SH
You: Come on. You can't be the only Sherlock alive. -SH
You: Actually I know you're not the only one. HS
You: JW*
Stranger: Who else do you know who's named Sherlock? SH
You: I don't know him personally. There's this american buffoon that has your name. JW
Stranger: Of course he's american. SH
You: Worse? Seems like he have a me. -JW
Stranger: He has a you? SH
You: A rehab assistant called Joan Watson. SH
You: JW/*
Stranger: Interesting. SH
You: Interesting? JW
You: Should I have to learn how to wear a bra, then? JW
Stranger: Good lord, no. I'll do research on them. SH
You: Thank god. -JW I don't think I'll ever find one that fit me. -JW
Stranger: I know people who could help with that. SH
Stranger: Not that you'll be needing it. SH
You: I'd prefer a corset then. -JW
You: If I have to dress up as a woman, I want to be stylish about it. -JW
Stranger: You look too good as a man for me to ask you to change. SH
You: Idiot. -JW
You: Youre happy I love idiots. JW
You: OKAy, not all idiots. Just a curly one. JW
Stranger: I'm glad the curly one is me. SH
You: What if I was talking about someone else? JW
Stranger: I'd be devastated. SH
You: Joking, sunshine. JW
You: Only you. -JW
Stranger: Good. I want to be the only one. SH
You: Weeeellll. -JW
You: You'll have to share me baby. -JW BUt only with a dog and a child. JW
Stranger: I'm fine with that. SH
You: Good. -JW
You: Just so you know. Gladstone is a bit territorial .JW
Stranger: I doubt it will be an issue. SH
You: We'll see after he pee on your leg. -JW
Stranger: You underestimate my dog whispering skills. SH
You: Sherlock, dogs and childen hates you at first sight. -JW
Stranger: Children do. Dogs are better. SH
You: Weren't there a chihuahua once trying to eat your calves? JW
Stranger: He was angry that they arrested his owner. I thought it only fair to allow him to express that anger on my legs. SH
You: Presumptious ass. JW
You: And he tried to chew them even before we did caught him. -JW
Stranger: Fine. Chihuahuas don't like me. SH
You: And there was that german sheppard too. -JW
You: The one who kept trying to mount your leg while growling. JW
Stranger: Fine. I see your point. SH
Stranger: (So sorry, brb)
You: ((oka))
Stranger has disconnected.
Stranger: ((Sherlock is, by far, the school’s most attractive student, and the star pupil of the dance class. John (18), the captain of the school’s elite rugby team, is just one of his many admirers. Unfortunately for the besotted blond, Sherlock is quite unattainable, and never seems to pay him much attention)). Did you like the flowers I sent for you earlier today? - JW
You: Ehn? They were yours? -SH (16)
Stranger: Yes. Of course. - JW
You: They were nice, I guess. -SH
Stranger: I thought roses were your favourite? - JW
You: I don't know. I've never received flowers before. -SH Waht should I do? Send you a thank you note? SH
Stranger: No - no, it's fine. Really. I just wanted to ask you out, actually. - JW
You: Me? You sure you want to date me? -SH I'm not the blond girl with pigtails, John. -SH I'm the very male one, even if I have to wear tights. -SH
Stranger: I know who you are. I'm not that stupid. - JW And I'd really like to date you. - JW
You: OH. -SH
Stranger: Yep. - JW
You: Oh. SH Again. SH Ehm, thank you, I guess. -SH
Stranger: So, you will go out with me? - JW
You: NO. -SH
Stranger: Okay. - JW
You: It's because I don't do dates. SH Nothing against you, John. -SH
Stranger: Right. I'm sorry. There a reason why? - JW
You: BEcause I'm too busy to date. SH Trainings and the shows. -SH I don't want to get involved and then delude people because I have more pressing matters than a date. -SH
Stranger: What if I was willing to be a second priority? - JW
You: And why would you do that? -SH I've heard that a relationship doesn0t work like that. HS
Stranger: Not usually. But I want you. Not anyone else. - JW
Stranger: I'm willing to sacrifice. - JW
You: And then you'll resent me because I'll be thinking of joining the Vienna's Ballet Company and not thinking about you. -SH
Stranger: I can live with that. - JW
Stranger: I'll take whatever time you have to give me. - JW
You: Even if it's just a few hours every now and then? SH
Stranger: Yes. - JW
You: I still don't get ehy you want me of all people. SH
Stranger: Because I love you. - JW
You: you don't even know me. -SH
Stranger: I've been at school with you for years now. - JW
You: And we've talked a few times. -SH Not enough to have you delevop deep sentiment toward my person. -SH
Stranger: If you don't want me, just say so. Don't discredit my feelings. - JW
You: I don't know if I want you, John. SH It's still hard to wrap my head around the fact you want me, of all people. SH
Stranger: Alright. - JW
Stranger: Take your time. - JW
You: Apologies, John. SH It was not my intention to belittle your feelings. -SH
You: It's just.. Noone has ever expressed an interest in me before. SH I mean, in me as a person. not just a body to fuck. -SH
Stranger: I see. - JW
You: I hope I was not tto rude. -SH
Stranger: You weren't. Let me know when you've decided. - JW
You: But now you're upset. -SH
Stranger: You could never upset me. - JW
You: You write like you're upset, then. -SH Short sentences. Veiled sarcasm. -SH
Stranger: There's no sarcasm. I'm just...a bit hurt, but, that's my fault. I should have known you'd say no. - JW
You: Why is your fault? -SH
Stranger: I'm not good enough for you. - JW
You: I never stated that. -SH
Stranger: You didn't have to. - JW
You: [delayed] I can try the dating thing, if you're still interested. -SH
Stranger: I will always be interested. But only if you're sure. - JW
You: I'm sure I want to try. -SH
Stranger: In that case, what are you doing this weekend? - JW
You: I have to practise a new routine. -SH
You: But you can come see me, if you don't mind classical music and me cursing like a sailor because I might miss a step. -SH
Stranger: Sure thing. That'll be cute. - JW
You: I am not cute. -SH
You: Cute is for babies. Or detached limbs. -Sh
Stranger: Detached limbs? - JW
You: Forget I mentioned those, please. -Sh
Stranger: Right. - JW
You: I might have never mentioned my secret pasison. -SH
You: passion*
Stranger: Oh? I'd love to know. - SH
Stranger: *JW
You: Investigate murders. -SH
Stranger: That sounds more up my alley than dancing. - JW
You: I could teach you how to dance. -SH It's not that hard. -SH
Stranger: I doubt I'd be any good. - JW
You: Practices make perfects. -SH We just have to have more lesson for you. -SH
You: Obviously i'll teach you. -SH
Stranger: We could try that. - JW
You: I won't even chew you out when you'll step on my toes. -SH
Stranger: That's very sweet of you, thank you. <3 - JW
You: What's a <3? SH
Stranger: It's a heart. - JW
Stranger: Tilt your phone round. - JW
You: Il look like a cat muzzle with a paper hat. -SH
Stranger: Other way round. - JW
You: Oh. -SH
Stranger: See it now? - JW
You: Yes. -SH
You: It's dainty. -SH
Stranger: Good. :) - JW
You: Another hat and some dots? -SH
Stranger: Smiley face. - JW
You: Other way around right? SH
Stranger: Yup. -JW
You: Sorry. As you can tell, I don't have many social relationship. -SH
Stranger: It's alright. You'll learn, love. - JW
You: Love? -SH
Stranger: Just a term of endearment. - JW
You: [delayed] I like it. -SH
Stranger: Really? Thanks. :) - JW
You: It's warming. -SH
Stranger: So is your smile. - JW
Stranger: (Hey love, did you wanna continue on email?)
You: ((yeah, definitely)
Stranger: ((What's yours email? I'll send this now :) ))
You: (([email protected])
Stranger: ((Thanks so much! Sending now))
Stranger has disconnected.

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You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You both like johnlock, Sherlock, and parentlock.
You: Are you Sherlock Holmes? HM ((Hamish Morstan (16). John and Mary broke up just before Sherlock came back and John never mentioned her. Hamish is John and Mary’s son but Mary never told John she was pregnant. Sherlock and John are now partners and it’s nearly 17 years since John least saw Mary. Tw: Mary died in a car accident recently))
Stranger: Yes. SH
You: Good. -Hm I need your help sir. -HM
Stranger: I do special rates. What is your problem? I am great with murder and missing persons. SH
You: I need to locate a man. -HM His name is John. But I don't know much about his. -HM
You: I just have a blurry picture of him with mum. -HM
Stranger: That is a common name.. SH
You: He was a doctor in london 17 years ago. -HM Does that help? HM
Stranger: A surname would help more. SH
You: It start with W. -HM
You: I can send you the picture if you want. -HM
You: Do you have kik? -HM
Stranger: No. I am normal. SH
Stranger: This is very unhelpful. SH
Stranger: Why do you want to find him. Is he an ex? SH
You: No, I think he might be my biological father. -HM And I'm normal too, just with kik I could have sent you the picture immediatly. HM
You: Emails isn't working now. HM
Stranger: I have no idea what a kik is. The picture doesn't matter. SH
Stranger: I see. It's usually an ex.. SH
You: I'm gay, but I'm not into elders. -HM
Stranger: I see. I assumed you were older. SH
Stranger: I take it he doesn't know about you. SH
Stranger: I'm bored and my partner has a soft spot for charity cases. SH
You: Iìm not charity. I can pay you. -HM
Stranger: (brb)
You: (kay)
Stranger: I will have my John as around for your dad. SH
Stranger: *ask
You: Fine. -Hm I sent you his picture. The blurry one. -HM I hope you got it. HM
Stranger: Oh god. SH
You: Yeah, it suck in quality. -HM But you can regognise the main features. -HM
Stranger: That's my John. SH
You: I mena, not everyone has blonde hair in London, and such a terrible taste in clothes. -HM
You: Wait.. What? HM
Stranger: That's my partner. SH
You: IS that a joke? HM
Stranger: Of course not. SH
Stranger: I wouldn't joke. SH
You: I asked, because mum say my sense of humor sucks. A lot. -HM
You: Used to say, right. -.HM
Stranger: I see. She's dead. SH
Stranger: I'm in shock. SH
You: Sit down and take really deep breath. -HM
Stranger: I didn't really think he had sex with women. SH
You: He's gay? HM
Stranger: He's married to me. SH
You: How the heck a gay man end up in bad with a woman? HM
You: Oh god. That would make you a sort of step-dad? HM
Stranger: Drunk probably. You're 17? I was abroad then. SH
Stranger: I suppose. SH
You: Oh god. You're curly. -HM
Stranger: Curly? SH
You: Mum, when she she was a drunk, used to insult a curly that took her jumper away. -HM Now it make a bit more sense. -HM
Stranger: I see. SH
Stranger: I suppose I better come pick you up. SH
You: Sh.. itake mushrooms. I forgot to introduce me. -HM I'm Hamish by the way. -HM
Stranger: ...Of course you are. SH
You: Well, it has been my name for the last 16 years. -HM
Stranger: It's complicated. SH
Stranger: John will want to meet you. You should come for dinner. SH
You: I0m in jail. Not sure the the ugly beast wil llet me go. -HM
You: Jail = foster home. Not a real jail. BEfore you jump to conclusion. -HM People tend to do that. -HM
You: Idiots. HM
Stranger: Not for much longer. SH
You: Why? HM Do you plan to help me escape? HM
Stranger: You will come here. SH
You: OH. -Hm
You: But you don't even know me. -Hm What if you two hate me? HM I don't want to impose. .-HM
Stranger: It's better than care. SH
You: Let's be serious. Even living under a bridge is better than care. -HM
Stranger: My flat is warmer than a bridge. SH
Stranger: You can have a DNA test and dinner. SH
You: Most flats are. Unless the tenant is an idiot who like to freeze off his balls daily. -HM or is dead. -HM
You: And a DNA test? -HM Do we really have to? -HM I faint at the sight of blood. -HM
Stranger: Yes you have to. SH
You: Can't we have the swab version? HM Drool contains DNA too -HM or I can give you a sperm sample. -HM
You: I tend to react violently to anyone holding a needle next to me. -HM
Stranger: Something. You'll have to eat vegetables as well. SH
Stranger: We'll sort it. SH
You: I like greens things. -HM I'm not a baby. It's not like you'll have to change my diapers, sir. -HM
Stranger: Do you have a middle name? SH
You: Yeah, but it's embarrassing. -HM
Stranger: It's Sherlock not sir. SH
Stranger: It would be easier to know your full name. SH
You: Hamish Scott Morstan. -HM
Stranger: That's hilarious. SH
You: What's hilarious? HM
Stranger: We've a dog called Scott. SH
You: Why do you go by your second name, sir? -HM
Stranger: Scotty. SH
You: I've looked it up on the net, and a pop up informed me of your full name. HM
You: I might have get a virus too. .HM
Stranger: My grandfather was called Sherlock. SH
Stranger: What virus? SH
You: Some shit called Mycsomething. -HM
Stranger: I see. SH
You: Opsie. LEt's forget I said that, okay? I never cursed, if anyone asked you. -HM
Stranger: I wont tell John. SH
Stranger: He'll like you. He loves children. SH
You: Thanks. -HM
You: But I'm not a child, you know. I'm 16 and 7 month. -HM
Stranger: I'm aware. SH
You: So, how long before you make me jailfree? HM
You: I hate it here. HM
Stranger: I'm on my way. SH
You: Does John know about this? HM
Stranger: No. You're a surprise. SH
You: You sure he won't get a stroke? HM
Stranger: He's not old. SH
You: Usually people don't go out for a stroll and come back with the long lost son of a partner. -HM
You: You know, that tend to make stroke happens. -HM
Stranger: I am aware. SH
Stranger: John is tough. SH
You: Does he still wear awful jumpers? HM
Stranger: I like his jumpers. SH
You: You have to admit that that Christmas jumper he had in that picture was an eyesore. -HM
Stranger: I made that. SH
You: Fine. I'll ignore them. -HM
Stranger: Good. SH
Stranger: Do you have siblings? SH
You: No. -HM
You: Mum never wanted other kids beside me. She said that I was enough of a failure to even bother having another. -HM
Stranger: I see. SH
Stranger: We have five. SH
You: Whoa. -HM Are you planning to have a whole rugby team? HM
Stranger: I have no idea how many that would require. SH
You: Me neither. -HM I'm not a sporty person. -Hm I prefer books. -HM
You: And chemistry. HM
Stranger: I see. SH
Stranger: I don't want to like you. SH
You: I don't understand. -HM
Stranger: You're quite nice. SH
You: Thank you. -HM But I stil ldon't understand why you don't want to like me. -HM
Stranger: Because I have a family. SH
You: Why I don't belong to. I understand. -HM
Stranger: I will try to be civil. And you should move in. SH
You: No. HM
Stranger: No? SH
You: I don't want you to be civil with me. HM
You: And I don't want you to suffer my sight. -HM I got it. You have your sons and your partner. -Hm It's understandable how you think I might disrupt things. -HM
Stranger has disconnected.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You both like johnlock, Sherlock, and parentlock.
You: Are you Sherlock Holmes? HM ((Hamish Morstan (16). John and Mary broke up just before Sherlock came back and John never mentioned her. Hamish is John and Mary’s son but Mary never told John she was pregnant. Sherlock and John are now partners and it’s nearly 17 years since John least saw Mary. Tw: Mary died in a car accident recently))
Stranger: It's Sherlock Watson-Holmes. Are you a client? You're young, and want me to help you find a relative? SWH
You: WAtson-Holmes? The website didn't mentioned it. -HM Anyway, yeah, in a sense I need you to help me get in touch with a relative. -HM
Stranger: I'm married to a man. Not everyone approves of that sort of thing. He's my sweetheart and father of my child. We've a little girl. SWH
You: Lucky you? -HM I'm an orphan. -HM But Mum mentioned a John WAtson in her diaries, and I need to find him because maybe he can be my father, .HM
Stranger: I see. There must have been a mistake. I'm sorry I can't help. SH
You: Fine. HM It was worth a shot anyway. HM Have a good life. -HM
You: [delayed] Look, i don't want anything from him but a signature on paper, so we can both go on with our respective lives. -HM
Stranger: What signature? SH
Stranger: You couldn't afford me fees is all. SH
Stranger: *My
You: Emancipations papers. -HM So I won't end up in foster. -HM
Stranger: I see. I suppose I could forge a signature for you. SH
You: You're afraid I'll ruin you perfect life, aren't you? HM
Stranger: I don't know what you're talking about. SH
You: You know him. -HM
You: John Watson. HM You married him. HM
You: and you don't want me around so I can fuck it all up. -HM
Stranger: You've done your research. SH
You: Anyone with half a working brain can type Sherlock Watson HOlmes on Google, come on. -HM
Stranger: John would have told me about you. He would have looked after you if he knew. He's that sort of man. SH
You: Mum fleed before. -HM
You: She told me there was this curly bitch that took my dad away from me. -HM
Stranger: Of course I don't want him to know about you. He has a family. SH
You: YOu have a family with him. -HM
Stranger: Exactly. SH
You: Fine. -HM I don't need both of you. -HM
You: I can always stay where I am. It's not like CPS is going to find me anytime soon. -HM
Stranger: You want to steal him from me. SH
You: I just want him ti sign a damn paper so I can go on with my life. HM
Stranger: I can sign it. SH
You: I don't want your pity. .-HM
Stranger: I dont want you to ruin my marriage. SH
You: And why a teenager would ruin your marriage? It's not like he can come back to mum. -HM
You: She's dead. -HM
Stranger: You called me a bitch. You hardly seem to want to play happy families. SH
You: I never called you a bitch. I merely reported how mum referred to yo... Wait... You are Curly? HM Go Figures. .HM
Stranger: I assume so. SH
You: Mum hated you with all her guts. -HM
Stranger: I didn't steal him. SH
You: is it true that she shoot you? -HM
Stranger: Yes. She shot me and John and her broke up while I was in hospital recovering. SH
You: Not a good thing to do. HM I think. HM
Stranger: Your mother thought it was necessary. SH
You: Mum though it was necessary to fill herself with vodka daily. She was not the best judge of character. -HM
Stranger: I see. I am sorry. SH
You: Why? HM Did you told her to drink herself stupid? HM
Stranger: John would have wanted you. He would have raised you. He is wonderful. SH
You: Pity I'll never know him. -HM
Stranger: You will upset our daughter. SH
You: When can I have my paper? HM
Stranger: As soon as you send it to me. SH
Stranger: When were you born? SH
You: May the 16th 1998. -HM
You: I'm almost 17. -HM
Stranger: I see. SH
Stranger: That's our wedding anniversary. Not the year but the date. SH
You: Another reason for you to open the damn mail and sign the paper. .HM
Stranger: Another thing you've ruined for me. SH
You: Well, too bad I can't kill myself. .HM
Stranger: I don't want you to do that. SH
You: Obviously. -HM
Stranger: I want you to not exist. SH
You: I reapeat: Too bad I can't kill myself. -Hm It's not like your precious family will be undermined my my demise. HM
Stranger: Not having you exist and wanting you dead are different. I wish you hadn't been created. I wanted a child that was both mine and John's but that wasn't possible. So John had one with a woman. And now he's another baby that's John's. SH
You: IT?S NOT MY FAULT: -HM I never wanted to be born. -HM I never asked for it. HM
Stranger: It's not my fault I married your father either. Neither of us new about you. SH
You: Why do you think I hate you? HM
Stranger: You keep saying Mary hated me. And you lied to get me to talk to you. SH
You: I am not my mother. -HM And I never lied to you. -Hm
You: Your site is terribly out of date. It never reported you marriage. HM I just took your full name and googled it. -HM
Stranger: I see. SH
Stranger: I suppose I aught to tell John. SH
You: I'll find another way. -HM I just have to keep hiding for another years. Hm It wont be that hard. -.HM
Stranger: He'll probably want you to move in. SH
You: Boring. -HM
Stranger: GIve you money for things. SH
You: Boring . Hm Again. I have a job. -HM
Stranger: Good for you.SH
You: It's not much, but I get to eat. .HM
Stranger: You could meet your sister. SH
You: Won't she hate me? HM
You: You said so. HM I'll upset her, .HM
Stranger: You upset me. SH
Stranger: I don't like sharing. SH
Stranger: I wanted to be special. SH
You: You are the one who shared his life with him. -HM You are special. -HM
Stranger: He was with a lot of people before me. SH
You: And he choose you, after all. -HM
Stranger: He probably has lots of bastards. SH
Stranger: He settled for me. SH
You: Nah. HM Don't think so. -HM
You: I found a picture of him. -HM He doesn't look like the type who practice bed jumping. -Hm Or anything remotely bad. -HM
Stranger: He doesn't look the type but he flirts with everyone. SH
You: And to whose bad he keeps coming back night after night? HM
Stranger: You texted at a bad time. I found messages on his phone. SH
You: Give me the number. HM I'll tell you to whom it belongs. HM
Stranger: It's his nurse at work. SH
You: Blonde? HM
Stranger: And pretty. SH
You: [delayed] I might have stalkered him. HM
Stranger: I don't understand. SH
You: I looked up for him, (okay several) And followed them for a while. -HM
You: The blonde bimbo just want to help him organize a surprise party for you. -HM
Stranger: I feel really shitty now. SH
You: Why? HM
Stranger: I've been mean to you. SH
You: I was not an angel either. -HM
You: MUst have took that from Mum. HM
Stranger: I worry I'm never good enough for him. That he only stayed because he felt bad about the shooting and my spine being broken.. SH
You: Idiot. -HM
Stranger: That doesn't make me feel better. SH
You: Because you know you are an idiot. -HM 17 years with him, and you're still afraid of that? Hm And let me guess. He doesn't know. -HM
Stranger: I'm a coward. SH
You: NO, you're human. -HM
Stranger: I told John about you. SH
You: And? -HM
Stranger: He wants to meet you. SH
You: What about you? -HM
Stranger: .I don't...SH
You: You don't want to meet me. -HM That's okay. -HM Just have him sign the paper, please. HM I won't meet anyone of you if you are not okay with this. -HM
Stranger: I feel like you're a cukcoo. SH
You: The term is sociopath, thanks. -HM
Stranger: No. I mean. A cuckoo bird leaves it's eggs in other nests for other birds to raise. I had my perfect nest and now am discovering there has been a cukcoo egg sitting in the nest all these years waiting to hatch and spoil everything. SH
You: Oh. -HM No, I won't. -Hm I'll just take my signed paper and disappear. HM