Julian Bashir falls in love with riding hounds after moving to Cardassia and essentially becomes the Cardassian equivalent of a horse girl. He’s obsessed with riding hounds. He wants a riding hound. He NEEDS a riding hound. He begs Garak for one. Garak is Castellan so he doesn’t care and just gives his husband anything he wants. But of course Julian picks out the worst riding hound ever. It sucks. It’s an absolute waste of oxygen. It’s mean, it always bites, it doesn’t listen to commands, it spits acid if you get too close, it projectile shits all over the stables on a regular basis. It’s name is Rootbeer. Julian named it. Garak hates Rootbeer. He spends a ridiculous amount of time each day plotting out creative ways to get rid of Rootbeer instead of working on his official duties. But he never follows through because Julian loves Rootbeer, and Garak is whipped. So Rootbeer is here to stay. Rootbeer hates everything, including Julian. Especially Julian. No amount of patience, expert training, raw meat treats, or love will ever make Rootbeer become a functional riding hound or care about anything except itself. Sometimes, Castellan Garak looks up from his seemingly never ending pile of paperwork, and stares out the windows of his executive office, at the stables beyond the back edge of the gardens, with a fiery hatred in his eyes, a hatred so passionate that he has to fight hard against the overwhelming urge to bash his own head against his desk in frustration. Because Julian is happy and that’s all that matters.
