good mourning

“you’d be surprised that i didn’t take out of my professor’s eyes when she said ‘no wonder you gained so much weight that semester…’ my daughter was right there with me and i had to hold back.” she admitted. looking back at her life for the past five years, she could barely recognize herself from when she got out of princeton. “how about something right now? can i take you out to go get lunch? we could also just stay in?” she nodded her head towards her room. “or am i asking for too much.”

“ah, that is some true character development there. guess all it takes to change someone is a few years and a kid, right?” karina let out a dry laugh, arms crossing over her chest. talking to everyone had just helped karina realize how little she actually changed over the past few years. “i mean, yeah, we could. we could just.. get room service.” she began, head nodding slowly as she started heading toward the other girls room. “or something.”

“thanks,” charlie smiled back. “you should meet her sometime. see the kid that has turned me into a total softie.” she didn’t know how far she could go with karina. last night would have probably ended wonderfully if she hadn’t just ran off like that. “how can i make it up to you? i’m sure there are something that i could do. perhaps… a redo of last night?”

“i mean, yeah. i could meet her. that would be really nice. anyone who was able to turn you soft must be pretty special. so, sure. whenever you have time or, y’know, whenever.” karina knew very well that everyones lives changed a lot in five years but the concept of charlie with a kid was still baffling to her. “yeah, we could.. do that. do you want to just.. get drinks later again? we can meet at the bar or something.”

charlie was at a loss for words. the only thing that she could remember was that she went into full mom mode and left as soon as possible. “all ava could say was that alyssa was crying and the next thing that happened was i was out that door. no questions asked. i wasn’t thinking about anything else but to get to her.” she took one step closer to her, her features softening. “i’m not going to press it, karina. but i just want to know if there’s anything else that’s going on here.”

“alyssa.” she repeated the name slowly, lips curling up into a small smile. “it’s a very cute name.” her head was nodding slowly then and her teeth were biting softly into her lower lip. “motherhood is a good look for you, charlie. really.” clearly the news was shocking to karina and it was mostly her fault, anyway. she had cut ties with almost everyone from princeton when she left. “there’s nothing else going on here. just bitter you left last night is all. it’s alright though, okay?”

charlie could not believe that this was actually happening. hell, logan probably handled the news about her having a kid better than karina is. she followed after the girl, not really sure why she’s even keeping up. “hey, stop. please?” she stopped in her tracks, hoping that she would turn around. “i messed up last night. i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to just leave you like that. but why do i feel like it does matter? you wouldn’t be acting like this if it didn’t.” she looked down, taking a deep breath. “i’m sorry.”

karina turned around when she heard the other girls voice. “i just don’t get why you couldn’t just say something about it.” she offered a quick shrug of her shoulders, her hands moving to sift through her pockets for her room key. “it really doesn’t matter, charlie.” there was a pause between her words and karina was sighing softly, offering a sincere smile to the other girl. “congrats on the kid though. clearly you’re a great mother.”

“lying? hold on–” charlie followed karina into the elevator, awkwardly smiling at the other girl that was also there. “i’m not making up excuses, karina. i have a daughter.” she whispered as she tried to reason with her. “she’s five years old and was crying last night. the only thing on my mind was to get back to her.” she pulled out her phone, showing karina her home screen. “she is who i went back to.”

karina’s eyes shot over to charlie when she continued her spiel about a child. “she’s five years old?” she questioned, voice coming out no louder than a whisper. her eyes quickly became fixated on the phone screen in front of her. “she’s yours?” she questioned, taking the phone for a second to look at the picture better. “listen,” she began, handing the phone back to her just as the elevator beeped again. “i really don’t have time for this, alright? it’s fine. last night doesn’t matter anyway.” she was offering a quick smile at charlie before walking out of the elevator.

at that moment, charlie figured that it was not the time to be teasing her. she almost dropped the act until karina mentioned something about running off from anyone else. her guilt continuing to grow as the seconds past. “eventful. i had some things to take care of and i completely forgot to text you back.” she took a step closer to her. “hey, i’m sorry for last night. my, uh, daughter needed me.”

karina was quick to narrow her eyes at the other girl, arms crossing over her chest as she spoke. the words that fell from charlies lips had her at a loss for words. “you’re lying.” she mumbled, her attention being pulled from the other girl when elevator in front of them beeped. “you don’t have to make up excuses, charlie. it’s fine. don’t worry about it, alright?” karina made her way into the elevator then, her finger quickly pressing the button for the floor that she was staying on.

charlie’s eyes couldn’t help to look over karina, a lazy smile tugging at the corner of her lips. “oh?” she repeated back to her, only slightly amused. she mirrored the woman’s movements, her smile unfaltering. “hey karina, long time, um, no see?” she knew exactly what she had done last night. just one text from ava saying that alyssa woke up crying made charlie leave the bar immediately. not even a simple text to karina was sent. “how was last night?”

karina did her best to get to the elevator, her hand quickly pressing the up button when she got there. “fine.” she replied, eyes shooting charlie a look when she responded. she shoved her hands in the pockets of her jeans and pursed her lips together. “last night was just fine. thanks for asking.” there was only a brief pause before she was finally turning to look at her. “and how was your night? run off from anyone else?”

charlie was vigorously typing away at her phone. apparently her boss had no idea what a vacation meant with all the emails that he kept sending her. she honestly had no idea where the hell she was going in the first place. all she knew was that she was pacing around in the lobby.  “have that you asshole, piece of shit, fuck face–” she triumphantly pressed send, watching as her phone worked to let the email fly into whatever space without looking where she was going.

@kcrinamorenos

“could you watch where you’re–” karina stopped herself mid-sentence when she finally looked up from her own phone, eyes immediately meeting charlie’s. she had managed to leave her high and dry just the night before and karina was only a little embarrassed by the whole situation. “oh.” she mumbled out, clearing her throat. “sorry.” her eyes fell to the ground and she was quick to step around the taller girl, arms crossing over her chest as she attempted to escape.

what the fuck has karina been up to?

“so i’m assuming you like autumn?” she said, with a little laugh at the end. “It definitely breaks the traditional boundaries though.”

“i sure do. and, i mean, breaking the traditional boundaries is the whole point of doing it.”

“When their front yard looks like a murder crime scene.”

“how big of a crime scene? like, a single shooting murder crime or like a whole group of people died kind of crime?”

“i definitely would not fuck trump. he isn’t a person –– he’s a cheeto with a wig on. i think the pool of villains extends just to homicidal maniacs.”