🐟┆Kaji!! ꒱

I've learned that to be holistically healthy, one needs to develop and maintain all optimal functions of oneself: Physical, Emotional, Social, and Mental.

Obviously, Jotaro excels in the physical category. He's conventionally attractive, taller than the average male population, well-defined with a muscled build, fit as hell, street and book smart, and highly in tune with his environment making him adaptable in any circumstance.

He's "strong" in that aspect we all know at a superficial level.

However, we start to see the core problem once we strip this good-hearted man of his physical appeal:

Emotional? He believes he doesn't need to express them to others because why should he. He refuses to process them and instead keeps them behind a locked wall of stoicism and aloofness.

Social? Can't communicate to save his life. He's reclusive and doesn't know how to socialize outside of work. Guarded and skeptical around others. Too much of a workaholic to bother making new acquaintances (if he even knows how) outside of familial connections.

Mental? At 17, he went on a death crusade over Asia and the Middle East, almost died numerous times, and most likely lived with unresolved PTSD that carried over into adulthood, and further deteriorated his already poor social and emotional skills.

What do we have then? If we look past that powerful exterior of a man, we have inappropriate emotional expression, poor socialization, and constant fatigue of dealing with bullshit that relates to his trauma.

And this is what we mean by his "core": His mindset. His inner machinations. The soft spot his enemies would need to target in order to defeat or kill him, strategy-wise.

I. Emotional

We pretty much already know how this man handles emotions. And this may come off as "irrelevant" to the dudebros and the meme riders who believe "haha feelings are for pussies, I advocate for edgy autistic Florida man who don't give a fuck, elopes with dolphins, and berates women".

But believe it or not, he has them, just like any other human being on the planet. I said it once and I'll say it again: Not everyone will wear their heart on their sleeves. Some will convey emotions publicly with no issue, while others would prefer to keep to themselves.

But how does this contribute to him being "weak" at his core?

Essentially, it's similar to how someone with depression may behave (not everyone, some of them). One may appear friendly, sunny, and bubbly to everyone around them, not knowing they're actually suffering from a void that eats them up from the inside when alone.

For his case, it may look like he doesn't care about what happens to him and everyone around him, considering his nonchalant and aloof behavior, but beneath that cold exterior, he cares way too much for his family, friends, and allies. He feels too much to the point where once his allies are endangered, he would sacrifice his well-being without a second thought.

And that's an issue to him.

To him, emotions make him vulnerable and in his circumstance where enemies are actively hunting him down trying to find his weak spots, his emotions should be kept behind doors because he doesn't know how to regulate it on the outside so it's either total stoicism or lashing out.

I found someone saying this line about him that fits him so well: "He's a good person who doesn't know how to be a good person."

This is a man who means well and truly wants to help out of the goodness of his heart, but because of his inability to convey his emotions properly and is unable to pick up emotional cues, it can lead to shit tons of misunderstandings due to inappropriate tone & expression, and that can change how someone views him in the long run, thus leading to unintended deterioration of personal relationships (which contribute to the social aspect of his weakness).

I found a visual representation of what I just said above. Just to give context: The show is about a married couple who struggles to keep their relationship afloat, having to navigate through family politics, work & life balance, and miscommunications so they could find why they loved each other in the first place.

The emotionally-reserved character here with the poor communication skills is the girl. She's a CEO who just received a call, came out from work, and meets with her husband, asking him to accompany her to a doctor's appointment.

Observe how she thinks she views herself VS how others actually view her as.

Other's POV: Demanding, brash, and insensitive Her POV: Anxious, hesitant, and confused

Now remember what Araki had written about Jotaro? "He doesn't believe he must reveal his emotions to others because he thinks everyone can figure him out, leading him to be a victim of misunderstandings. Others think him to be cold-hearted, rebellious, and insensitive."

II. Social

With emotions as our base foundation to poor communication skills, this leads us to his weak socialization aspect.

In a recent quote reblog about how he was raised as a child may have contributed to his tough persona, I mentioned something about his need of "Security".

Growing up, it was mostly just him and his sweet pacifist mother Holly. Joseph couldn't have visited often (he hates Japan) and his dad is a busy musician with a packed schedule on tour. As a kid up to early adolescence, he was coddled by his mother and raised as a good student. Everything was going great for him.

[In popular headcanon] Once he passed puberty, the change to his Part 3 MC era began. People began picking fights with him and bullying him, and he began to see the world as a threat to his safety. Knowing his mother, he wouldn't rely on her to defend him against these dangers. She was too kind, too friendly, too loving for her to deal with the harsh life he now has to deal with.

So he had to be the stronger one for both of them. He already had the physical attributes for it, so why not use it to his advantage?

He got on the popular delinquent trend back in 80's Japan, integrated a couple of cool masculine-esque personalities as his own from his favorite Western and Crime media, and is then able to project this menacing aura everyone should be afraid of, to ward potential threats away from him and his mother.

But Mijin, how does this make him weak? What does this have to do with his need for security?

Think about it: The poor guy's already introverted, doesn't feel comfortable with his emotions that he can't express properly, and now he has to be skeptical with people around him because he realized how shitty society can be, which leads to intimidation that wards off not only potential foes but potential friends as well, making it look like he's anti-social.

On the outside, people are likely to think that he likes being this way when in reality, he seeks a reliable support system on which he can lean onto. Everyone with a sound mind wants that subconsciously because we are social creatures. It's part of our nature.

He's constantly fearful of his surroundings, growing even more vigilant as he ages, but he doesn't look afraid because he chooses to put on a brave face to challenge said fears instead of acknowledging he's scared. I read somewhere in an ask that's not mine that in the manga, some panels actually depict Jotaro shaking/trembling in a mix of fear and adrenaline during some of his fights.

He wants to be around people who he can trust. People who he can lower his defenses with. People who are capable of protecting him just as he is capable of protecting them. People who can face his intimidating aura and challenge it to stand on equal grounds with him or to remind him of his place when he goes too far with certain things. Hence, why he seems comfortable being with the Crusaders.

For once, he wants to feel safe.

To not feel like he has to be this strong pillar of hope that everyone depends on.

To be someone being protected, instead of the other way around where he was always the strong protector. He wants a life of normalcy where he can just be a marine biologist and a professor with a loving family he can come home to.

But that can't happen. The inner circle of friends he counted on is either dead or far away, leaving him even more fearful of the world around him. This results in even more guarded skepticism, always watchful of who's an enemy Stand user and what their Stand could do. Because of his cautious nature, this leads to minimized socialization with others.

With little to no solid support system he can count on, he has no one he feels completely secure with because he believes danger will always come to hurt and/or kill those near him. He doesn't want to burden others with the issues & responsibilities of dealing with Stand users. He wants them to live the normal life he could no longer have.

He doesn't trust in the capabilities of his loved ones when it comes to defending themselves against the amount of potential threats and dangers he has faced, and yet he cares about them dearly. So, he commits to what seems to be the most practical solution in his mind: Self-Isolation.

To be a distant beacon where danger is attracted to and away from those dear to him.

(As we see in the beginning of Part 3 where he willingly locks himself in jail as soon as he sees himself as the threat, and in Part 6 where he stays away from his family once he realizes his enemies were targeting him).

"Your family is your weakness."

All this leads him to become what Araki always envisioned him to be: A lone hero.

III. Mental

Now onto the last part, this part of the essay will focus more on the popular headcanon the community has made about him: "Jotaro has PTSD."

Considering what he's been through at only 17, it would be no surprise that he'd acquired major trauma after those 50 days. Think about it- he gets injured more times than he can count, almost dies numerous times, sees his grandfather get "killed" in front of him, and all this combined with the constant reminder that his mother's life is also on a time limit. A failure to kill DIO meant a failure to save Holly.

The amount of pressure and risk he had to endure for her (and there will still be people who adamantly believe that he hated Holly because he said "bitch" to her twice in the first two episodes).

Now, remember when I said about him having this mentality of over-independence when dealing with stressors? It was still manageable during Stardust Crusaders, but because of what had transpired in Cairo, that mindset carries on to the rest of his adulthood, more so if we consider that he most likely didn't get any therapy or treatment for his trauma.

It might be normal for a teenager to hold onto this stubborn notion of "I can do this by myself" and be casual about it, but with trauma now involved, that notion warps into a persisting belief of "by doing this myself, no one else will get hurt" (i.e. refusing help, doing solo fieldwork, self-isolation).

But Mijin, you keep saying "mentality" this, "mindset" that. What are you talking about?

There's an old Tumblr post I found that talks specifically about this in great detail, but to put it shortly: Jotaro has always wanted to do things by himself because he believes that not only will the task be done with, there would be no one else involved with it, making it better for him to cope mentally if ever shit hits the fan (tying back to poor emotional expression and insecurity in bonds).

If any injuries were to be inflicted, he would be the one to receive them, and he alone, because who knows how he'll react and/or cope when his allies are harmed instead of him over and over again? (refer to the trauma of Jotaro surviving Cairo while the majority of the team that went with him died a.k.a "survivor's guilt")

(Also, refer to how he had exhibited great distress when Jolyne was about to be struck by a rain of knives that Pucci sent)

This might also be the reason why he's more self-sacrificial as an adult: Will be the bait during the rat episode instead of Josuke, takes the brunt of Sheer Heart Attack's explosion to spare Koichi, dives straight onto a path of bullets to save Jolyne, etc.

The only possible solution so he could snap out of that belief he holds on to is that strong, reliable support system he internally needs. People who can help him without sustaining fatal injuries in the process [social]. People who he can approach to release any pent-up frustrations and inner conflicts [emotional].

If he had found those people, then he might have been able to deal and/or cope with his trauma better instead of letting it linger and change his outlook in life [mental].

But we all know how his life went in canon. One moment he's a kid playing ball with his mother, then in his last, he dies by having his head bisected by a time-altering Stand.

Jotaro is a person with a gold heart and a rough exterior. Someone who wants to help and protect his loved ones from the unpredictability of the world the best that he can. But even then, his best wasn't enough. His fear was masked with an air of strength and capability, perhaps as compensation for everything else he lacked:

Adequate processing of emotions.

Stable connection with familial, platonic, and romantic bonds.

A sound mindset that stems from effective coping for his PTSD.

Confession

When his feelings for you start to bloom it isn’t sudden or loud, no frenzied butterflies in his stomach, no heart beating out of his chest. Instead it’s slow, gentle like a snowflake quietly floating down until it finally touches your cheek, contact soft as a kiss.

He feels lighter when you’re near him. His shoulders are less tense and his smile comes easier.

Unfortunately, Jotaro has maxed out perception so he realizes the change pretty fast as well as what caused it.

So now what? He’s definitely not gonna make a move, but he also refuses to stay away from you, so he just opts to ignore it until it goes away.

This tactic, surprising nobody but him, doesn’t work out.  Quite the opposite actually, because as we know trying not to think of something just makes you think about it more.

Unable to stop himself from stealing a few too many glances, standing a bit too close and talking to you a little too softly.

These actions too subtle for anyone to pick up on it, but he himself is painfully aware of every single one.

For Jotaro to even consider confessing he must have it bad for you; it has to actively keep him up at night.

And it does. In bed, completely alone with his thoughts he looks back on your last interactions. His ‘lack of self-control‘ makes him feel horrified, though at the same time even just the memory of you manages to clear up the dark clouds in his mind a bit which ends of making him even more horrified.

Safe to say he gets way too little sleep during this time.

Maybe it’s sleep deprivation or maybe he’s just at the end of his rope, either way he finally breaks.

You merely asked him whether he was alright since he seemed so tired recently when he slips up.

“Kinda hard to fall asleep when you refuse to get out my fucking head.“

Did it make any sense to blame you for this? Obviously not, but he’s exhausted and grouchy and just really needed to complain.

The weight of what he just said hit him even before you could ask him what he was talking about.

Even in this state he could’ve probably gotten himself out of that situation without admitting anything, but he chooses not to. He’s not a coward nor someone who backtracks so he decided to just see this through.

*sigh* “Good grief, alright, guess this had to happen at some point. Honestly thank fuck I can finally get this off my chest. I can’t do this any longer. You’re always there, at the forefront of my mind, no matter what I can’t stop it. And for some goddamn reason I don’t even really want to instead I wanna be near you all the fucking time.“

He’s clearly frustrated, exasperated even, but he’s not angry, not at you at least. His hands are placed on the back of his neck and he absolutely refuses to meet your eyes, using his hat as a shield. He – the great Jotaro Kujo, one of the most powerful stand users ever and famously unbothered – was nervous.

You’re obviously aware of how uncomfortable he is both right now - post confession and with emotional vulnerability in general, so you opt not to drag this out.

You pull him close (more accurately he lets you pull him close) and kiss him, pouring all your emotions into the kiss. His surprise is quickly forgotten. His hands find your waist almost instinctively as he kisses you back. For once he is completely unguarded, he lets you feel his relief, his joy, his adoration.

Once you pull apart, you can still clearly see it all in his eyes. He truly tore down his walls for you.

He realizes then just how deeply he really feels for you and even more shockingly he doesn’t feel the need to hide it from you.

Relationship

You’re the only one allowed to casually touch his hair. He even beefs with his barber regularly.

Pretty much whenever you’re in his way, he just wordlessly picks you up and places you back down a few inches to the side.

To him you weigh nothing. Doesn’t matter if you’re 2000 lbs, he picks you up with the same ease you would a plate.

I know it’s clichéd, but he absolutely gives you his jacket when you’re cold. It feels way more special though, since he never takes it off otherwise.

Big on quality time. Just likes being near you, even if you’re just sitting next to each other in silence. The both of you on the couch, you using him as a backrest, each focused on your own thing (for him most likely a book) is a regular occurrence.

He’s been through a lot so he really treasures those peaceful moments when it seems no stressor or threat could ever reach inside your little bubble.

Usually doesn’t have a very long lasting social battery even in one-on-one situations. With you it’s different. “You don’t drain me like everyone else does“. Might seem innocuous but he basically just admitted you’re his favorite person.

When he’s touch starved (which is rather often) he simply takes your hands and places them where he wants them, primarily his hair, face and shoulders. If you don’t get the hint and dare to take your hands away he’ll “glare“ displeasedly (it’s more of a pout but shhh).

In crowds he walks behind you, holds onto your wrist or has you hold onto his coat sleeve, so he doesn’t lose you.

Always conscious of your safety. Walks on the side of the road, tugs you towards him when you’re about to walk into something, catches you if you fall etc. These aren’t dramatic displays, they’re casual, instinctual.

In general not the biggest on PDA, at least the more explicit kind. He won’t make out with you in the presence of others for example.

At the same time, he simply couldn’t care less what others think so he absolutely will have you sitting in his lap if he feels like it (and you’re ok with it obviously).

When you’re sick, he simply forbids you from getting up. He’ll make sure you get the absolutely best care possible while also regularly chastising you for stuff like not wearing a coat when you went out the day before or simply for getting sick in general.

He can read you like a book. He always knows how you’re feeling and what you need. He does whatever is necessary to make you feel better when you’re feeling down. Anything from a hug to a complete vacation.

He discreetly solves any problem he can for you. You know exactly what happened when your rude boss is suddenly nothing but nice and polite towards you, but you don’t bring it up. He doesn’t want you to. His goal isn’t your appreciation, it’s simply seeing you happy.

He does still enjoy receiving words of affirmation, although he isn’t the best at handling them. Especially in the beginning he can’t really return them, but he so obviosly enjoys them you find it more cute than rude.

[Compliment] “You always say stuff like that.“ “You want me to stop?“ “Hell no.“

Not the jealous type. He’s fully secure in himself and your relationship.

Does not tolerate any disrespect towards you. Apart from his own of course.

Teases you quite a bit but never crosses the line to actually make you feel bad. He knows all your insecurities and triggers. Never uses them against you though, even in the worst of fights.

If you’re insecure about some part of your body, he’d call you dumb because “there‘s obviously nothing wrong with it“, yet from that moment on you find him caressing or kissing said body part noticeably more often.

Don’t try to talk badly about yourself while he’s in earshot. He will shut you up, quite possibly not very politely but his hearts in the right place.

Not into kitch. Dates and gifts aren’t stereotypically romantic but personalized.

Likes involving you in his interests e.g. through aquarium dates but also partakes in yours.

Is secretly really happy you get along well with his family and friends. Especially Holly positively loves you. Once she’s been informed about your relationship, she immediately recognizes you as her daughter/son/child(?) in law.

Likes cuddling but not really while sleeping. The max is letting you use him as a pillow, which is only possible because he sleeps flat on his back aka like a corpse anyway.

Carries you to bed if you fall asleep anywhere else.

NSFW

Doesn’t see the appeal of quickies, partly because he’s not really into public stuff but primarily because he way prefers to take his time.

Not submissive. Sorry, I just can’t see it.

Strength and stamina maxed out. He could hold you up for hours on end.

Kinda obsessed with your neck. Kissing, sucking, biting or choking – if you’re into that.

Loves feeling you up. Big hands gripping your thighs, squeezing your ass, caressing your chest, stroking your back – they’re just all over you.

That’s why his favorite foreplay is making out with you on top of him. It gives him access to all of you. When he wants to escalate the situation, he’ll pull you into him, letting you feel how much he’s enjoying this – you.

Likes pinning you. To the mattress, against the wall, doesn’t matter.

He’ll deny it to his dying breath, but he isn’t that quiet. He isn’t very loud, but he definitely makes noises, especially when he‘s close.

Heavy breathing, swearing under his breath, groaning, even moaning from time to time.

Particularly audible when you give him head, partly because he can’t muffle his sounds in your neck.

Loves throwing you on the bed/couch or whatever else is safe to be thrown on.

He’s big on eye contact. He’ll often grab your face and make you look at him again if you stop, especially when it’s because you threw your head back in pleasure. He wants to see how good he makes you feel.

During intimacy he gets possessive. You’re his and he wants to hear you say it.

Likes leaving marks on you. Not even for others to see. He just likes how they look on you.

Couldn’t imagine anyone more enticing than you if he tried. Even when he’s getting off by himself, you’re the only person on his mind.

Afterwards he’s completely focused on you. Does or brings you whatever you’d like without you even having to verbalize your wishes.