My Personal Trash Can

Gale Dekarios has a habit of counting stars when he can’t sleep. Not aloud, never aloud, unless someone asks (Gods, he loves it when someone asks), but in the quiet of his own mind, tracing constellations with his fingertips against the fabric of his bedroll. Tonight, the sky is a mess of clouds, so he counts the stitches in his tent’s ceiling instead. Thirty-seven. Thirty-eight. Thirty-nine.

Outside, the fire pops softly, sending up embers that flicker like dying fireflies. Someone, probably Astarion, has left a half-empty bottle of wine near the coals, and the smell of it, warm and faintly sour, drifts on the breeze. Gale shifts onto his side, listening to the chorus of his companions’ breathing: Shadowheart’s measured exhales, Karlach’s occasional snort, Wyll’s steady rhythm. All asleep. All content.

Except, no. Not all. Not everyone is asleep.

There’s a rustle near the edge of camp, the sound of fabric shifting, then a quiet, frustrated sigh. Gale sits up, pushing his blanket aside. He knows that sigh. He’s heard it before, late at night when the others are lost to dreams, and the world feels too big.

Gale slips out of his tent, bare feet whispering against the dew-damp grass. The night air is cool, invigoratingly so, and he wraps his night robe tighter around himself as he pads toward the source of the sigh. There you are, sitting with your knees drawn up to your chest, fingers tangled in the curls at the nape of your neck, the ones he’s always thought looked like spun moonlight when the fire caught them just right.

“Darling,” he croons, crouching beside you. His voice is rough with sleep, warm as the embers still glowing in the firepit. “Still awake, I see.”

You startle, then relax when you recognize him. “Couldn’t sleep,” you admit sheepishly, picking at a loose thread on your trousers. The fabric is worn thin at the knees, and Gale makes a mental note to mend it for you later. “Mind’s too loud.”

“Ah, the dreaded insomnia.” He clicks his tongue sympathetically. “A most unwelcome companion.” When you don’t respond, he nudges your shoulder with his. “Come on, then. My tent’s far cozier than this patch of dirt, and I’ve just the thing to quiet that busy mind of yours.”

You hesitate, fingers stilling against the frayed fabric of your trousers. The offer is tempting, Gale’s tent always smells like old books and something faintly spicy, like cinnamon left too long in the sun, but the thought of being so close to him sends a flutter of nervous warmth through your chest. “I don’t want to be a bother,” you mutter, tucking a curl behind your ear only for it to spring free again in stubborn retaliation.

Gale huffs a quiet laugh, his breath visible in the cool night air. “Sweetheart, if you were a bother, I wouldn’t have offered.” He stands, offering you a hand, his palm upturned and waiting. There’s ink smudged along the side of his thumb, and the sight of it, so ordinary and domestic, makes something tight in your chest loosen. You take his hand.

His tent is exactly as you remember, cluttered in the way of someone who’s always thinking three steps ahead. Spellbooks are stacked haphazardly beside his bedroll, a half-finished letter to home, Waterdeep, peeks out from beneath a teacup, and a single candle flickers on a makeshift desk of overturned crates. Gale kicks a pair of socks out of the way with the heel of his foot, clearing a path for you. “Make yourself at home,” he says, waving a hand. “Though I’ll admit ‘home’ is currently somewhat… lived-in.”

You snort, settling onto the edge of his bedroll. “Lived-in is one way to put it.”

Gale kneels beside you, his fingers brushing against the spines of his spellbooks before settling on a well-worn volume with gilded edges. "Ah, here we are," he murmurs, flipping it open with practiced ease. The pages are dog-eared and annotated in his cramped handwriting, margins filled with scribbled thoughts and corrections. He clears his throat dramatically, adjusting an imaginary pair of spectacles. "Tonight's selection: The Ballad of the Moonlit Duel, a rather charming tale of mistaken identities and ill-advised wizardry. Unless you'd prefer something drier? Theories of Arcane Transmutation has a particularly soporific chapter on- "

"No, no," you interrupt, giggling softly. "The ballad sounds perfect." You tug at the hem of your sleep sweater self-consciously, suddenly hyperaware of how it rides up when you sit. Gale notices, fucking of course he does, but he doesn't stare. Instead, he reaches for a blanket draped over a nearby stack of books and shakes it out with a flourish.

"Cold?" he asks, already tucking it around your shoulders with almost too much care. His fingers linger for a moment, warm against your collarbone.

You nod, pulling the blanket tighter. It smells like him, ink and ozone and something indefinably comforting. "A little, yeah."

Gale settles beside you, close enough that you can feel the warmth radiating from him, but not so close that it panics you. He holds the book in one hand, the other gesturing absently as he begins to read. His voice is smooth, melodic, the kind of voice that could make a grocery list sound like poetry. Damn him. You let your eyes drift shut, listening to the rise and fall of his words, the way he lingers on certain syllables like he’s savoring them.

“And so the rogue, cloaked in shadow,” he reads, “crept toward the duelist, unaware that the moon had betrayed her silver silhouette…” His free hand finds yours under the blanket, his thumb brushing over your knuckles in absent comforting circles. You don’t pull away. Instead, you curl your fingers around his, anchoring yourself to the moment.

Halfway through the ballad, you shift, trying to find a more comfortable position. Gale pauses, glancing down at you. “Alright, darling?” he murmurs. You nod, but he’s already moving, adjusting the pillows behind you with a flick of his fingers, a touch of magic, just enough to fluff them into something more inviting. “Here,” he says, guiding you to lean back. “Better?”

You hum in agreement, sinking into the softness. Gale resumes reading, but his voice has softened, slowed, as if he’s tailoring the rhythm to the steady rise and fall of your breathing. His hand never leaves yours.

Your eyelids grow heavier with each word, the cadence of Gale’s voice weaving through the quiet like a lullaby. The tension in your shoulders melts away, replaced by the warmth of his hand in yours, the gentle pressure of his thumb tracing idle patterns against your skin. You’re vaguely aware of the blanket slipping down your shoulder, but before you can adjust it, Gale’s fingers are there, brushing the fabric back into place with a tenderness that makes your breath catch.

“There we go, you can relax, Gorgeous…” he coos, pausing mid-sentence to tuck a stray curl behind your ear. His touch lingers, tracing the shell of your ear before retreating, as if he’s memorizing the shape of you. “You’re nodding off, sweetheart.”

You blink up at him, fighting the pull of sleep. “M’not,” you mumble defiantly, though the words slur together. The candlelight paints his face in gold and shadow, softening the sharp lines of his jaw, the curve of his smile. He looks younger like this, unguarded.

Gale chuckles, closing the book with a soft thump. “Liar,” he teases, setting it aside. “But I’ll forgive you.” He shifts, turning to face you fully, his free hand coming up to cup your cheek. His palm is warm against your skin, his thumb brushing the apple of your cheek. “You’re beautiful like this,” he says quietly, as if it’s a secret. “All soft and sleepy.”

You want to protest, to scoff or roll your eyes, anything to deflect the warmth pooling in your chest, but exhaustion weighs heavily on your limbs, and Gale’s thumb tracing slow circles under your cheekbone is hypnotic. Instead, you nuzzle instinctively into his palm, a quiet sigh escaping you. His breath catches, just slightly, at the movement.

“Honey,” he murmurs, shifting closer. The bedroll dips under his weight as he leans in, pressing a kiss to your forehead, chaste but lingering, his lips warm against your skin. “Let’s get you properly settled, hm?” His hands slide down to your shoulders, guiding you to lie back fully, and you go willingly, boneless with drowsiness.

Gale arranges the blanket around you with a precision that borders on ceremonial, smoothing out every wrinkle before draping a second one that’s thicker, and woolen over your legs. “There,” he says, satisfied. “Now, unless you’d like me to resume thrilling tales of magical mishaps- ”

“Stay,” you interrupt, the word slipping out before you can stop it. Your fingers curl into the fabric of his sleeve, holding fast. The request hangs between you, vulnerable in its simplicity.

Gale goes very still. For a heartbeat, you think you’ve overstepped, that he’ll politely extricate himself with some scholarly excuse, but then his breath leaves him in a quiet rush, and his fingers tighten around yours. "Well," he says, voice rougher than before, "since you asked so nicely." He doesn’t move to pull away. Instead, he shifts carefully, stretching out beside you atop the blankets, his body a warm line against yours. His arm hesitates for a fraction of a second before settling around your waist, his hand splaying possessively across the curve of your hip.

"You fit, almost perfectly," he murmurs, surprised, as if he hasn’t spent months imagining this very moment. His nose brushes the crown of your head, inhaling the scent of your hair, campfire smoke and the faint herbal tang of travel soap. "Like you were made to slot right here." His thumb strokes idle circles through the fabric of your oversized sweater, tracing the curve of your waist. You shiver, and he misinterprets it, tugging the blanket higher. "Cold still?"

You shake your head, pressing closer. His heartbeat thuds steadily beneath your ear, a counterpoint to the rustle of canvas in the breeze. "Just... never done this before," you admit. "Been this close to someone." The confession hangs between you, raw and unvarnished. Gale’s hand stills on your hip.

"Oh, sweetheart," he says softly. There’s no pity in his voice, only a quiet wonder that makes your throat tighten. His fingers resume their path, mapping the swell of your hip, the softness of your belly, with a reverence that steals your breath. "Then let me tell you," he murmurs, lips brushing your temple, "you are wonderful to hold." His palm presses flat against your stomach, warm even through the layers of fabric. "Like holding sunlight. Or… no, that’s not quite right." He huffs a laugh, his chest vibrating beneath you. "Perhaps I’ll think of a better metaphor tomorrow when I’m not half unconscious. For now..." His arm tightens, pulling you flush against him. "Rest.”

Gale’s heartbeat is a slow, steady drum beneath your ear, his breath stirring the curls at your temple. The weight of his arm around you is solid, grounding—an anchor in the quiet dark. You trace idle patterns against his chest, fingertips skimming the soft fabric of his shirt, and feel him shiver.

"Tickles," he giggles sleepily, catching your wrist with playful gentleness. His fingers slip between yours, lacing tight. "Though I’ll hardly complain if it keeps your hands busy." There’s a smirk in his voice, warm and teasing. You huff, but don’t pull away.

The candle flickers, casting long shadows across the tent walls. Gale exhales, his thumb stroking the inside of your wrist. "You know," he says, quieter now, "I’ve spent years memorizing incantations, tracing every line of power in the Weave, but this?" His hand squeezes yours. "This is the first magic I can’t quantify."

You tilt your head to look at him. Firelight catches in his lashes, gilds the curve of his lower lip. "Poetic," you tease, though your voice wobbles.

Gale's smirk softens into something tender, his eyes reflecting the candle's glow like pools of molten honey. "Only for you," he croons, pressing a kiss to your knuckles. His lips linger just a heartbeat longer than necessary, and you feel the warmth of it travel up your arm, settling somewhere beneath your ribs.

Outside, an owl hoots, low and mournful, but inside Gale's tent, the world has narrowed to the space between his breaths and yours. He shifts slightly, his thigh brushing yours beneath the blankets, and you freeze, suddenly aware of every point where your bodies touch. Gale notices, because of course he does, and his hand slides up to cradle the back of your head, fingers tangling gently in your curls. "Easy," he whispers against your hair. "I'm not going anywhere."

You exhale, unclenching muscles you didn't realize were tense, and let yourself melt into him. Gale hums approvingly, his fingers massaging slow circles into your scalp. "That's it," he coaxes. His other hand finds the small of your back, rubbing soothing strokes up and down. "You carry so much tension here, sweetheart. Like you're always bracing for impact."