hazy thoughts unending

i said i’d stop, i meant to try, but every day loops back again a wound i kiss instead of clean. the sky won’t weep, it only dries, it holds its ache like inkless pen, and hides the wreck behind the sheen.

A flash of warmth within my cheeks That waves “hello!” so quaintly greet… This beacon from which good embarks To shine throughout the dark: You are so bright. I wince; this sunlit merriment Spurs squints but hints encouragement. Now blinded, I suspect much more: I’ve never seen before. You are so bright.

If you’re the deep end And I don’t know how to swim, You know I’ll jump in.

you were never mine to lose, but god, didn’t i mourn you like a grave i dug myself.

I mourn anew every single day. I refeel the gut-wrenching loss over and over and over.