Writing, mostly

Passion in a relationship is often defined purely in terms of sex, but John is sex-repulsed, so where does that leave him? He’d been accused of lacking passion by past partners, and at first he was so afraid that Martin would feel the same, that he wouldn’t feel adequately loved or desired because of it. He didn’t need to worry. Turns out, they are both more than eager to explore nonsexual forms of intimacy, demonstrating passion and appreciating it in one another. He’s always felt like he has so many shortcomings, but not when he’s with Martin. He feels whole. He feels like he’s enough, like he could possibly deserve the happiness they’ve carved out for themselves. Martin makes loving him seem easy, which is not something he could have ever imagined. He hopes he makes Martin feel the same. And he does. 

I’ve been struggling w writing so I’m just gonna pitch a bunch of scenarios with a sex-averse John bc we need more content.

if your response to, “I wish there was more sex repulsed asexual representation,” is to point out not all aces are sex repulsed, maybe first stop and ask yourself why you are doing that. We live in a society that’s constantly telling us we need to have sex and I’m so glad there are aces who aren’t bothered by that, but it doesn’t invalidate those of us that do not want to. This isn’t a competition, I want to see all kinds of aces, being upset with a lack of respect for sex repulsed aces doesn’t mean I think the rep that’s already there for sex positive aces should be changed. I am capable of wanting both, why aren’t you?

in ep 146, John makes a “woosh” noise as a descriptor. Did he learn that from Basira?? That is so cute if so

I’ll never forget my experience of first listening to The Magnus Archives because we have this serious dour man who dismisses all of these cases as ridiculous regardless of how invested and sincere he sounded while reading them. And I’m like, okay, he’s the only window into this world we have, maybe he’s right. But then a couple episodes later he reveals that Jane Prentiss is actually truly real and well documented and they need to notify the authorities immediately if it isn’t too late already, and I’m left there like, what??? The worm sex episode is the one you believe??? And it’s the first clue you get that John isn’t what he seems, he really believes more of this than he is letting on and you realize that there is so much more going on here than we could ever guess.  

I’m really sorry I haven’t updated any fic lately, I didn’t mean to leave two short ones hanging at the end. I’ve just been having a hard time lately and haven’t been able to write anything I’m even remotely happy with. Hopefully I’ll be able to get them finished soon.