Diary of a rotten Mind🥀

Drogen sind zwar scheiße, aber hätte ich sie damals nicht genommen wäre ich heute nicht mehr hier.

There’s a reason why we feel lonely even though we aren’t alone. It’s because loneliness is not about how many friends we have or how many people are in the room with us. It’s a disconnection from others. Being social doesn’t cure loneliness, loneliness comes when there is not a single person close enough to see past the illusion to who we really are and what we really feel inside.

„Heute war wieder verdammt schwer, aber vielleicht ist es morgen schon wieder besser.“

nothing changes. nothing gets better. no one changes, and no one simply cares. all you can do is accept and try to stay alive.

I fucking hate looking in the mirror. Why the fuck do I look like that and why the fuck can’t I be different and how the fuck can anyone even tolerate being near me.

Please tell me i'm not as forgettable as your silence is making me feel.

My brain cannot seem to fathom when people WANT to talk to me. Like you actually want to hear from me? Me of all people? Amazing. That's weird? Are you okay? You find connection in ME? I'm worthless though, and my opinion doesn't.. .really matter to anyone, so why does it matter to you? I'm not cute, popular, or famous, I'm kinda a loser...and you want MY time? ......unbelievable.

sorry i cant hang out i forgot how to mimic human like behaviour

BPD math: they said I can come "if I want" instead of "you should come" so that means they hate me and they wish I was dead.