Step into my Parlour

god grant me the strength to send this email, the courage to send this email, and the wisdom to send this email

why are you reciting the triforce

how else am i supposed to send this email

bastard keeps sprinting to get ahead of me then walks really slow so i accidentally kick him and then meows all pathetically like i attacked him

I’m sorry, does your cat’s name tag say “hello my name is bastard”

@agayworthfightingfor

If you’re one of those public speakers that say “Goodmorning….Oh come on we can do better than that, GOODMORNING” I automatically do not like you from that moment on.

bitches will listen to a female cover of "can't help falling in love" and cry as they fantasize about a future with a loving wife. bitches will hear the line "take my hand/ take my whole life too" and just fucking lose it. it's me. i'm bitches.

fandom moms do not interact

*is being held by a leash* *growling* (lowkey a fandom parent)