This month has fucking sucked.
So, let me start at the beginning. In early February, I got a dude here on this very platform, a dude sent me a message. He was basically putting out an advertisement for being a sugar daddy. And easy money sounded good to me. I mean, all he asked for patience and honesty and promised no nudes or sex, so I thought to myself "Okay, this seems like a good deal."
So I get in contact with him because he gave me three different ways of contacting him and he tells me about where he's from, his age, his job. All he wants is someone to spoil. He's looking for honesty and transparency and trust. He wants to "be my mentor". He's had at least 50 past babies and he knows what he's doing because he has clips of women saying they enjoyed him.
And after a bit, he says i need to pay his account manager $100 to get started. And so I do. And then it all goes downhill from there...
I dont mind paying the account manager. I do mind when I cant actually get the money.
See, I have CashApp. But since it have never had anywhere near that much money getting dropped into the app, it wouldn't take it. So now we're doing a weird "payment plan" that involves a lot of me sending him fucking bitcoin. Because thats a great way to do anything... and he talks about the registration fee and his account manager and...
I gave him the money I pay my mom in rent
The next month is a wombo combo of polite conversations and him asking about money and me trying to be friendly and getting more and more frustrated with the entire endeavor. He talks about what he does for a living. He talks about his dogs and his family and what he's been up to that day. And I try to reciprocate. I talk about my job and my current going on.
But he also keeps asking about my bank. Can I pull from this account? (No.) Can I ask my family? (No.) Can i buy gift cards? (Hard no.) Can I get a loan? (I got TWO.)
Yes, I took out loans. And this motherfucker is talking about his money, always reminding me that he "has it safe".
He was born to wealthy parents and got a job where in the past month he made a million dollars. He has traveled to Miami with his team and he payed four figures to have his house and his dogs taken care of while he was gone. And I cant scrounge up enough for half a tank of gas. I haven't gotten my damn hair done in over a month, so its looking bad. I cant do a damn thing because everything cost money and I don't have any.
And his crew... he has an account manager and a lawyer. One is a middleman who jumps in when I apparently get too frustrated and the other is the one who keeps changing amount numbers on me. Sixteen hundred turns to eight hundred and then i need to pay another grand, but its okay because im some sort of exception and Daddy will put up some of the expenses.
And a few days ago, I gave up. I was tired of the runaround and the fees and his lawyer told me about the rules I had never heard of because "they are private" so he doesn't have another legal issue like he had in the past. So I call him.out on lying by omission and putting me in bad spots snd I tell him he can go fuck himself. I block him and his two stooges.
Meanwhile, I am having a bad time at work. I work at a bakery. I have for about six months. And I'm just struggling.
I cannot remember temperatures. I always need guidance. An entire batch of blueberry bagels had to be tossed because my dough wanst right. I tried to rush something really simple just yesterday and had my boss tell me she was struggling not to fire me. So I am stuck on bagel duty because I "cannot be trusted to handle Sunday morning prep".
And since its tax season, of course that wants to be difficult as well. Can't for the life of me get into my id dot me account because its suspended for some damn reason. I cant finish my taxes because I can't get access to a specific pin that I need. So who knows how this tax season will work out for me...
And finally, I think my mom knows something is up. She keeps dropping advice about "using my head" and "not getting taken advantage of".
So, I have a job that I am barely holding onto, no money and two loans to start paying off and a barely there mental/emotional state that i am clinging on to desperately. My life is a mess of my own making and I just want... I dont even know what I want...
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