jules

why are all the actual real human jobs like baker and florist and childcare worker barely paying livable wages but the fake jobs like ai specialist boot licker or marketing campaign dick sucker making six figures

are those two dudes from supernatural ok? it’s been like 14 years. there’s high schoolers younger than their contract. i don’t think i’ve ever seen them in any other shows. are they allowed to leave? do they feed them?

jesus christ

This man lives in a world that 99.9% of humanity is unprepared for

This man is like the opposite of Simone Giertz

at some point someone’s gonna kiss you on the forehead which is just fucking stellar so stay alive for that

I have so many questions

In the name of everything decent in this world, you have got to turn the sound on.

why does the chain by fleetwood mac go so hard there’s no beat drop or anything just a guitar/bass instrumental and lyrics that absolutely fuck

Amy Adams could do The Revenant but Leonardo DiCaprio could never do Enchanted.

she’s not into you shes just social

me when i see my cat rub against someone i don’t like

I’m so ready to be able to legally drink. only eating all these years has left me very thirsty. I have heard very good things about water

John Mulaney needs to make another Netflix special cause I already memorized all of his work

Is it just me or is the reason that Eartha Kitt’s original version of “Santa Baby” is better than all the rest (other than the fact that Eartha Kitt is inimitable) the fact that Eartha was actually singing to a sugar daddy that she was playfully calling “Santa” and was dead serious about all the things she was asking for (…and Michael Buble was really trying to sing to Santa)

wait do people genuinely think that santa baby is about santa??? i’ve known that it was about a sugar daddy since i was like 11 i

Michael Buble doesn’t know what a sugar daddy is and that’s the flaw that will finally kill him

sleeping with your stuffed animals is punk rock don’t let anybody tell you different

being single is like… it’s just you and your bottle of water