James B 🤷

@faiiryteenz sorry this took so long, you’ve probably already forgot you even requested this. I’ve just been so busy, so again, I’m sorry. Enjoy :)

Warnings: Female Reader, Cursing, General grossness cuz this is the Jackass and CKY boys we’re talking about, Don Vito

@asskickedbygirl @butttxray

Meeting Bam, Ryan and the rest of the boys around 1993 or 1994, right as they started high school. Maybe you were a witness to one of Dico’s absurd pranks, maybe you watched Raab shit on one of the lockers at the high school, or maybe you ran into Bam at the skate park while he was practicing a trick; no matter how you met them or who you met first, you hit it off with all of them right away, and you quickly became the first (and only) permanent female member of the little group. With most friend groups, it takes a while for new people to become fully integrated into the group and to be invited to hang out with everyone else regularly, but in your case, it barely took a day. Almost immediately, the guys would start inviting you to come with them everywhere, from filming stunts to watching Bam do tricks at the skatepark to accompanying them to concerts, and soon enough it would feel like you’ve always been a part of their little group. They would pull pranks on you and made fun of you just as much as they did to each other, but if you were ever in a tight spot or were getting messed with by someone outside the group, they’d all stand up for you without question (by stand up for you I mean start a fistfight and then film the whole thing for CKY 1).

Almost immediately being dragged into the filming of clips for CKY 1. You’re already in a lot of stuff just by virtue of being present for it (such as the infamous bee incident and most of the street fights), but the guys would also want you to actually do stuff, so you would get to participate in a lot of the pranks, star in some of the skits, attempt skate tricks with Bam’s help (usually those would end with you flat on your ass on the pavement, but if you actually landed it everyone would go wild), and also be the unfortunate victim of a few practical jokes, usually from Dico or Bam. Dico goes for the more psychologically torturing stuff, like calling you at 3am every day for a month with a creepy voice telling you he’s watching you through your window, while Bam goes for the painful stuff, liking throwing bricks at you. After a while, the guys wouldn’t even have to ask or tell you to do certain things; they carry cameras around everywhere so they can start filming if anyone does anything interesting, and after being with them for a while you’d start cracking funny jokes and pulling good pranks and doing little stunts of your own without being told what to do or how to do it. Being around the guys does that to a person. I can picture you pulling a prank on Dico for the first time or attempting to do a prank call without his help and pulling it off perfectly and him just being so genuinely proud.

Being super close with all of the guys, but especially close to Bam and Ryan. Dico, Raab, Rake and all of the others are awesome and funny and you get along with them great, but you and Ryan have a special relationship where you can joke around with each other while still coming to each other for advice and to rant about serious stuff, and you and Bam switch between acting like siblings, acting like best friends, acting like an old married couple and acting like rivals. Sometimes the two of you hang out for days at a time (to the point of staying at each others houses), laugh at absolutely everything together, and hype each other up like no one else (no one hugs Bam tighter after he completes a hard skate trick than you do), but then other times you bicker and fight and butt heads to the point of dramatically declaring that you’re never speaking to each other again and giving each other the silent treatment for an entire week. People who aren’t aware of the relationship you and Bam have and who only witness the fights you have probably assume that you hate each others guts and don’t care about each other, but that couldn’t be farther from the truth; you and Bam know each other better than anyone else, and you wouldn’t argue so intensely if you didn’t care about each other so much. In contrast, you and Ryan almost never argue because of how well you understand each other and how patient and compassionate Ryan can be. He gets a little snippy when he’s in a bad mood, but you never take it personally, and he almost always apologizes later if he thinks he was too mean.

Becoming one of the main Jackass members (and the first and only female member at that point) due to how close you are with Bam and Ryan and how talented you are with pulling pranks and making jokes and just overall being really entertaining. Some of the other CKY boys, like Dico, Rake, and Raab, became more of the background guys for one reason or another (Dico wasn’t super interested in the spotlight, Rake had an actual job, and Raab was in a decent amount of stuff but not to the extend of Ryan and Bam by any means whether by choice or otherwise), but because you’re pretty much always hanging out with Bam and Ryan and able to pull off interesting stunts and pranks on your own, Jeff really pushed you to have a prominent role in the series and eventually in the movies. You have a great rapport with the rest of the Jackass guys, easily joking around with them and making them laugh, and you’re not afraid to volunteer for stunts and pranks no matter how gross or potentially dangerous they are.

Getting tons of injuries, both mild and severe, while doing stunts for the show and for the movies. The guys all get hurt pretty often, and you aren’t exempt from this. You’ve broken bones, needed stitches, gotten cut up, gotten bit by random animals, and nearly passed out several times, as well as sustaining at least a few concussions and needing several hospital visits, some longer than others. The guys usually don’t freak out too much, since you’re just as capable of dealing with pain as the rest of them, but Ryan does get a little more worried than the rest, and Bam gets pissed at you if you agree to shit that he thinks is way too dangerous for you or if you actually get seriously injured. Seriously, he’ll throw a total fit, argue with you about it for hours, ignore you for days at a time to teach you a lesson, and say “I told you so” if you do get hurt like he said you would. To his credit, though, he’s always the first to congratulate you and even apologize if you pull the stunt off successfully and don’t get hurt too badly, and he only gets so upset cuz he genuinely cares about you. If you ever came up with an idea that was way too dangerous, to the point where even Jeff and Johnny were against it, and you decided to do it anyway and got hurt, Ryan probably would get at least a little upset with you and tell you off, but again, it’s out of concern for you, and he’s usually pretty chill about stuff like that and doesn’t hold it against you for too long. Ryan and Bam are always the first ones to visit you in the hospital and the first ones to volunteer to ride with you if you ever have to be taken in an ambulance, and they get you gifts for your hospital stay, too; Ryan will buy you flowers and come by often to talk to you and watch shows on the hospital room TV with you, and Bam will get you a nice little card (which he writes a slightly mean but also heartfelt message on in his messy writing) and stay with you for hours to show you new music and tell you about whatever’s going on. Half the time, he ends up falling asleep on the hospital bed with you cuz he stays so late.

Hanging out with all of the Jackass guys in different ways. Steve-O will take you out for a wild night on the town, Knoxville will invite you over to watch a movie or listen to music, Pontius and Dave England will take you out for bowling, Wee Man will show you some cool skateboarding tricks, and Preston and Ehren are fun to just chill out with at a bar or a restaurant. Bam and/or Ryan will often come with you to hang out, and sometimes the entire Jackass crew will go out together to celebrate something or even just for the fun of it. You also hang out with the CKY crew a lot, also usually with Bam and Ryan, since they’re always fun to be around and since you still film stuff with them pretty often, such as episodes of Viva La Bam. Dico, Raab and Rake may not be in Jackass that much, but they’re still childhood friends of yours, and you’re not gonna give them up or stop being close with them just because you’re a bigger part of Jackass than they are. Often, they’ll all come to Bam’s house with you and the whole group will watch comedies together or throw parties or go out and look for trouble or even film movies such as Haggard and record episodes of Radio Bam.

Speaking of Radio Bam, you are 100% a main part of the show, appearing in pretty much every episode alongside Bam and whoever else decides to come on. A lot of interesting things happen whenever you come on, and so you’ve become a favorite of many listeners; you’ll tell tons of interesting anecdotes with Rake and Raab and make jokes with Dico that have everyone in laughing fits, you’ll get into bickering matches with Bam about god knows what, you’ll have sweet moments with Ryan about your friendship (and even occasionally have sweet moments with Bam when he’s in a more sentimental mood and gets vulnerable enough to tell you how much he genuinely cares about you), and you’ll gets tons of fans calling in to either compliment you or to tell you weird sexual shit that makes everyone in the room lose their shit. For one reason or another, you seem to attract all the weirdos and sexual deviants as intense fans. Episodes like this are also pretty much the best way for fans to see how you interact with the guys who aren’t prominently featured in Jackass or Viva La Bam, like Novak, Frantz, and Jess. Novak in particular has a very interesting rapport with you where he very clearly wants to bang you and always has a flirty remark or innuendo to make, but you always flatly shoot him down or make a joke that has everyone laughing at his attempts.

Being a main cast member on Viva La Bam, because why wouldn’t you be? Similarly to Radio Bam, Viva La Bam is where a lot of your funny interactions with Bam, Ryan, and the rest of the CKY guys take place, and where the fans really get to see your friendships with all of the guys. You’re there for basically every big moment, from finding jobs with the guys to pay off the heating bill to being involved in competitions to being Ryan’s lawyer during the State of Bam episode to witnessing Raab getting married to a Russian mail order bride. Bam also makes sure that you get plenty of moments of your own, and you often come up with a lot of the weird ideas for fun stuff that you and the guys can do to make the episodes more interesting. One of the best things about you being in Viva La Bam is your interactions with Bam’s uncle, Don Vito. Don Vito is known for being extremely obnoxious, and often gets loud and incomprehensible when he yells. When this happens, you often end up yelling right back at him just as loudly and incomprehensibly as he does, and this is usually extremely hilarious since no one has any clue what either of you are saying (plus it’s hilarious to see an old drunk man getting into a yelling match with a woman in her early twenties). Both of you throw your arms around and yell gibberish and just generally get all pissed off with each other and it always gets included in the actual episode because of how funny it is. The odd thing is that Vito actually seems really fond of you despite how often the two of you yell at each other; he always seems to talk you up and defend you when Bam is being a dick to you or when whoever Bam’s dating at the moment does something Vito doesn’t like (“Why can’t your girlfriend be more like her”, etc etc).

Getting to meet all kinds of musicians and famous people through being introduced to them by Bam. Bam’s an absolute fanboy for bands he likes, and he always insists on you meeting all his favorites, like HIM (Ville Valo seems to come over at least ten times a month and you’ve wondered if Bam has an actual crush on him at least a few times), Turbonegro, and Jimmy Pop of Bloodhound Gang. He insists on you listening to all of these bands with him, but if you actually start to become a fan or even date one of the many musicians he introduces you to, he gets all smug and insists that you wouldn’t have known about the band or musician without him and therefore he deserves the credit. He expects you to attend every concert with him, meet every musician with him, and rock out to the music with him whenever he plays it, and he’ll throw a little fit if you don’t. As much as it can be annoying, it’s also a little fun to get to meet so many fun people like Jimmy Pop who are always a blast to hang with, and it’s nice to see Bam to happy and excited.

Spending a lot of time chilling out with Ryan. Ryan’s super laidback and fun to be around much of the time, and the two of you have plenty of fun together without having to do anything crazy. You’ll talk for hours at a time while sitting on your front porch, you’ll watch TV together, you’ll help Ryan work on cars or just listen to him talk about cars in general since he loves them so much, or you’ll go out to a restaurant or a bar with him and just laugh and enjoy each other’s company for a while. Hanging out with him is as peaceful as it is fun, and he’s always there to listen to any problems you have while also keeping the mood light. You always try to find time to hang out one-on-one with him, whether it be between filming scenes of Haggard and Viva La Bam or during a free weekend. Even if you and Bam and the others are all in another country to film something, you still find time to sneak off with Ryan and hang out alone together. He’s your best friend for a reason.