The Results (based on 778 responses)!
First, the raw data on how people felt about the words & whether or not they wanted to use them for themselves:
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 28.4%
5: 18.8%
6 or more: 53.1%
Use:
4 or less: 46.1%
5: 7.6%
6 or more: 37.7%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 28.2%
5: 16.1%
6 or more: 54.4%
Use:
4 or less: 43%
5: 9.2%
6 or more: 47.8%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 14.1%
5: 9.4%
6 or more: 76.5%
Use:
4 or less: 30.2%
5: 7.5%
6 or more: 62.3%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 16.7%
5: 17.9%
6 or more: 65.5%
Use:
4 or less: 37.8%
5: 15%
6 or more: 47.2%
Boygirl or Girlboy / Boygirls or Girlboys
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 16.4%
5: 12.2%
6 or more: 71.2%
Use:
4 or less: 49.5%
5: 7.1%
6 or more: 43.2%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 10.9%
5: 17.6%
6 or more: 71.4%
Use:
4 or less: 56.2%
5: 13%
6 or more: 30.7%
Neo-Nouns (the ones most people haven't heard of)
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 57.5%
5: 19.8%
6 or more: 32.7%
Use:
4 or less: 76%
5: 9.1%
6 or more: 14.9%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 66%
5: 16.1%
6 or more: 18%
Use:
4 or less: 88.2%
5: 4.9%
6 or more: 7%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 51%
5: 18.5%
6 or more: 30.5%
Use:
4 or less: 77.8%
5: 8.8%
6 or more: 13.3%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 59.4%
5: 19.3%
6 or more: 21.4%
Use:
4 or less: 84.2%
5: 7.1%
6 or more: 8.8%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 64.2%
5: 16.3%
6 or more: 19.6%
Use:
4 or less: 88.2%
5: 5.7%
6 or more: 6.1%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 68.9%
5: 12.3%
6 or more: 18.8%
Use:
4 or less: 87%
5: 4.4%
6 or more: 8.7%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 63.6%
5: 14.8%
6 or more: 21.6%
Use:
4 or less: 85.9%
5: 6.7%
6 or more: 7.3%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 61.9%
5: 13.4%
6 or more: 24.7%
Use:
4 or less: 82.8%
5: 7.6%
6 or more: 9.3%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 87.9%
5: 5.9%
6 or more: 6.2%
Use:
4 or less: 98%
5: 1.1%
6 or more: 0.9%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 76.7%
5: 9.4%
6 or more: 14%
Use:
4 or less: 92.2%
5: 3.7%
6 or more: 3.9%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 29%
5: 18.5%
6 or more: 52.5%
Use:
4 or less: 58.6%
5: 12.8%
6 or more: 28.7%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 66.2%
5: 16.8%
6 or more: 17%
Use:
4 or less: 85.9%
5: 7.3%
6 or more: 6.8%
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 47.6%
5: 19.2%
6 or more: 33.3%
Use:
4 or less: 76.3%
5: 8.3%
6 or more: 15.2%
Asolb or Ajub / Asolbs or Ajubs
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 58.3%
5: 18.6%
6 or more: 23.1%
Use:
4 or less: 87.9%
5: 6.4%
6 or more: 5.7%
Fohman/Fohmen (& alt. spellings)
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 49.9%
5: 19.4%
6 or more: 30.6%
Use:
4 or less: 78.6%
5: 7.1%
6 or more: 14.4%
Feohr or Feor / Feohrs or Feors
Hate/Love:
4 or less: 45.3%
5: 17.9%
6 or more: 36.7%
Use:
4 or less: 76.8%
5: 9.3%
6 or more: 13.9%
Some (increasingly rambling) thoughts:
Altogether, the most popular word was, by far, genderqueer- for both the common nouns & the neo-nouns. This isn't really surprising, given both how its the most expansive word and it doesn't have the same neutral-monogender associations that "nonbinary" has built up.
I was curious about where enby would end up, since its a somwhat contentious word- a lot of people mentioned feeling infantilized by it or describing it as "cutesy". Based on this, around half of people like the word, but more people wouldn't want to use it for themselves than would.
Words derived from Old English (/Latin in one case, although I've said that I think "fidant" would work better in other contexts) tended to be more well received than others, which I think can be contributed to the fact that they tend to use sounds that feel more natural in English, and also just sound cool to a lot of people. Of these, kyth/kith was the most popular- and also the only neo-noun on this list that the majority of respondents liked!
The biggest reason (aside from simply not liking neologisms for NB/GQ people in general) for people being hesitant to use these was how well-know they are. A lot of people gave some variation of "I would consider using [x word] if it got popular."
I mentioned this in another post, but this both makes sense and presents a problem: a lot of people obviously don't want to use a term that requires a lot of explaining, but words don't get mainstream knowledge without use. To get a word mainstream enough, both needs to be generally likable and also have people use it enough that others think of it as "something I need to know about."
At the same time, a lot of NB/GQ language struggles to get off the ground because of exorsexism/NBphobia. Things associated with nonbinariness/genderqueerness is often automatically associated with being juvenile, feminine, and pointless, whereas binary language- which dominants out language for obvious reasons- is just naturally seen as adult, respectable, and useful. NB/GQ language that isn't focused on adhering to the binary- nouns, titles, labels like NBLNB or ceterophobia- tends to be ignored in favor of things that are associated with the binary and are therefore validated as being useful and normal, which perpetuates the cycle.
I also think this comes from the problem of the monogender understanding of "nonbinary." I think this is partially because NB/GQ advocacy is still in its infancy- even as trans activism is starting to get its place in the spotlight and there is nonbinary activism alongside that, our discussions are still overwhelmingly binary and because we often discuss the issues of anyone who isn't monogender binary by just using one word. In a world where being nonbinary is still not well-understood or well-discussed, only using one term to describe agender people, androgynes, neutral people, third gender people, xenine people, etc. is doomed to pick up one single monogender connotation.
There's obviously benefits to grouping together, but there's also the fact that we just do not see NB/GQ people or identites as having equal worth to binary ones. In binary society, monogender, binary man & womanhood has history, mythology, community, and a diverse spectrum of language through which it can re-assert & explore itself/selves. NB/GQ-hood does not, because it has been constantly targeted and erased. It is not seen as having equal depth or worth or significance. Its hard to find academic discussions on being nonbinary that focus on being nonbinary- whatever that means in that moment- and not being trans at large. & all of this is part of the same problem that leads nonbinary people to have less awareness of & access to non-traditional HRT and surgery.
I know there's many people who identify as NB/GQ specifically because they don't enjoy or relate to gender, period, and want to disconnect themselves from it as much as possible. I respect that, and relate to it, sometimes. But I also have experienced a lot of self-loathing and despair from the feeling that my agender-neutral identity means nothing- that its nothing but a hyper-individual label, completely disconnected from anyone or anything else, that I can wear whatever and call myself whatever but at the end of the day, only man/woman has any cultural weight or ability to connect me with others. And its also very infuriating to know that, if our society hadn't been built on a foundation of patriarchal exorsexism, this wouldn't be true- that we may have had cultural mythologies outside of male/female, and a sense of community. My opinions on gender also tend to align with gender liberation as opposed to gender abolition (as I don't think gender is any more inherently bad as a construct than, say, connecting different colors with emotions or traits).
That's all to say: I really hope that we can find a way to engage with nonbinary/genderqueer identity, community, language, etc. in a way that's able to connect everyone who finds those terms useful. I don't really have a good gauge on how common my feelings on being NB/GQ are, but I hope that, at the very least, people found some funny new words to try out from this survey 👍
snowghoul
ellievsbear
pixelskylines
theartofmadeline
blakekathryn
origamiaround
