Jon's Brain Farts

BF002 - Retrofy your laptop

Imagine a USB stick, you put into your laptop. It stores files and lets you carry your data easily and safely. Now imagine it makes your keys sound like a typewriter. AAAAAnnd it has a lever on it to make the computer hit return. AAAAAAAAnd it makes the sound of that. Now that would be awesome. 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAnd you can serenade your office space with performances of the below.

(also it’d be a lot of fun to put it into people’s computers without them knowing and watch the confusedness)

Happy 2019, I figured this year I might try to buy nothing for myself all year.  In the run up to Christmas, I was asked what I’d like as presents and as normal I thought about how spoiled I have been with a wife who always gets me awesome things that are nicer than I’d get for myself and how incredibly lucky I am with family and friends and the gifts I get. I don’t really need anything. I don’t really need anything. Not in the real need sense.

So for 2019 I’m going to try and go without buying myself anything new. There are three notable exceptions to this rule.

1. Food - yeah no second hand food for me. The yes men concept was funny but this shit eating grin doesn’t need the real thing. 

2. Parts - second hand parts are great for the Maestro Van i own but they’re a headache and if you actually want to fix most things some new ancillaries make sense. If you disagree, try rebuilding an engine with an old head gasket and then we’ll talk.

3. Underwear - I’m gross but i’m not that gross, my daggy boxers might need replacing. I want to finish the year with socks without too many holes. I might need to get fresh undies. 

Ok so getting the ball rolling here’s the idea that’s been rattling around in my brain the last week...   Many years ago I used to visit an awesome salad cart for lunch in covent garden. The lady running it and her partner had a pair of stalls in Central London where you could get an awesome box of salad and a chunk of bread for 5 quid. They only ran them in the summer and i joked they should sell soup in the winter using the same produce they used to make the salad. It never went anywhere but like a horrible parasite the idea lay dormant in my brain to rear up occasionally like some kind of mental malaria. 

The other day it flared up again and some new bits fell into place. 

What would happen if you flipped the model of a soup kitchen on it’s head? You set up a stall selling soup and bread. Seasonal produce from local farms, so called ‘ugly veg’, donated past it’s sell-by but still perfectly fine veg, all made into tasty, wholesome soup. Warming, cheap, honest, nutritious and delicious.

Sold to the general public from market stalls for a good price from the start of autumn through to the end of spring. 

Now for the good bit. 

The soup is made and sold by homeless people who need a job. A reliable source of income and something to get a start on the ladder and change one’s circumstances.

Maybe some chances to learn new skills like baking and cheffing. Cash in hand if needs be but ideally as a way to allow staff members to start a bank account and the dross of paperwork that are required to get other base needs sorted. Think of it like a big issue you can eat. Potentially the start up cost is mitigated by the simple nature of the venture. A kitchen to cook in, a tea urn and a place to sell. The model is simple and hopefully relatively cheap at it’s heart. We sell based on weight so people can bring their own containers so it’s not dependent on shitty chuck away plastic. Pay it forward initiatives and gifting of soup could help the spread. Commercial partnerships to sell larger volumes of soup to canteens and maybe even one day frozen for people to consume later. Geotagging and a digital presence would allow for people to find where the good soup is being served and what the soup of the day is. People in need of a good meal or down on their luck can get a 100% discount and the stall is run and managed by the staff who are employed. Even if it’s just a warm urn to warm cold hands around, ideally this should end us a force for good to allow people to help themselves.