Jay's Semi-Charmed Kind of Life

In fact, it is outright illegal to try and collect those debts from a person who didn’t cosign the loan and isn’t executing the will.

My great-grandmother had her identity stolen before she died at the age of 93, and thousands of charges were racked up on credit cards in her name. After she passed away, they called my mother to try and collect. My mom laughed at them, and told them: “She’s dead, good luck collecting.” The credit card asked my mother, “Don’t you want to clear your grandmother’s debts? Don’t you want to clear her good name?” My mom laughed at them again. “No,” she said. “Because a 90 year old wasn’t watching porn with those credit cards, and her name is fine. Don’t give credit cards to old women likely to pass away soon. This is on you.”

If a loved one of yours dies and bill collectors (credit cards, loans, etc etc) start calling you off the hook and request that you pay off their debts, tell them in no uncertain terms to go fuck themselves.

The reason being is that the moment you give them a single penny, that debt is now on YOU because you’ve now agreed to pay it off.

DO NOT EVER PAY OFF DEBTS THAT AREN’T YOUR OWN. 

DO NOT EVER PAY OFF DEBTS THAT AREN’T YOUR OWN. 

DO NOT EVER PAY OFF DEBTS THAT AREN’T YOUR OWN.

Beautiful and scary; that’s so Pokemon.

For those who aren't aware, as I wasn't until I googled it, 8 minutes and 46 seconds was the exact amount of time that George Floyd was pinned on the ground.

A lot of people were perplexed by criticism of AOC using her free time and “government wages” to play video games. 

It’s her money. They know that. 

But conservative logic is never very logical.

“Robert” later tried to justify his comment. 

And James felt the need to tack this on to Robert’s justification.

These two seem very concerned about how congresspeople manage their finances. If $400 to play a video game is a big deal I wonder how they reacted to this… 

This idea of AOC “wasting taxpayer money” is an extension of a much more common criticism she gets. They think earning money is antithetical to her ideals–constantly telling her that because she is a “socialist” she should be giving her salary away. 

It’s a constant theme in her Twitter replies. 

And it is a continuing frustration of mine that conservatives don’t know what the hell socialism is. I mean, one of the goals of Democratic Socialism is that charity shouldn’t be necessary because everyone’s needs are met. So I’m not sure where they got this “GIVE YOUR MONEY AWAY!” schtick.

They see all socialism as akin to authoritarian Soviet Union style “communism” or authoritarian Cuban style “communism” or corrupt Venezuelan “socialism” or the authoritarian “Communist” Party of China. 

None of those examples are particularly socialist. More rebrands and bastardizations. Conservatives always ignore the “corrupt” and “authoritarian” qualifiers and then also refuse to acknowledge that people can call things whatever they want–even if it is inaccurate. Hence the oft debunked “Nazis were socialists” trope.  

I mean, I’m a chubby hairy human that wears a bear hat and I call myself “The Frogman.” 

(When I send unsolicited duck pics, people are very confused.)

In their minds, socialism is just bread lines and empty shelves.

Note: Picture taken in an American CVS during a pandemic where capitalism almost immediately collapsed into a hellscape with nothing to wipe our bums.

Well, almost nothing…

Then you’ll hear them bring up “wealth redistribution.” 

I’m pretty sure this is how they imagine that concept…

Everyone lines up and puts all of their money into a giant pot. 

The money is counted.

The people are counted.

The total amount of money is divided by the number of people. 

Everyone lines up again and each person is given the same amount.

Societal collapse.

Cannibalism?

Yadda yadda yadda… “And that’s how you get vEneZuELa!” 

Except… no one is proposing anything like that. That was nowhere on Bernie’s presidential to-do list. 

(Some might think that is a “Bernie is old” joke but, like me, he believes regular bowel movements are important at any age. Get that fiber, kids.) 

Even with universal basic income, you can still earn beyond what you are given. But the right can’t resist a sad simplification of progressive policies. Personally, I think a more accurate term would be “wealth equity”–meaning peoples’ labor is valued appropriately and all wages are enough to live on.

AOC makes about $175K per year. She is constantly reminded of this and told she has come into great wealth. And, yes, it sounds pretty decent, but she has to maintain two living spaces with high security (she gets constant death threats) and she must travel back and forth from DC to New York quite a bit. 

Her salary is above average, but I think her labor is valued appropriately. And I don’t think she takes that for granted. 

She takes her role as “representative” very literally. 

She doesn’t do the typical 9 to 5 and clock out. She works as much as she can fit into her day without burning out. You’ll often see Instagram stories at 10pm where she is just finishing her day. She travels back to her district much more than many of her fellow representatives. She actually cares for her constituents and communicates with them regularly via community outreach and town halls and… visiting their bitchin’ Animal Crossing islands. 

Recently she set up a food bank and organized a team to help her personally deliver necessities to people affected by COVID-19. 

Her NY office has also been calling everyone to check up on them and ask if they need anything. 

Can you imagine Mitch McConnell doing that?

The other reason they think she should give all her money away is because they don’t think she earns it. They say she hasn’t passed a single piece of legislation. This shows a deep ignorance of how Congress works. For one thing, freshman reps rarely have the cachet to create and pass their own legislation. That said, she is a sponsor or co-sponsor of 13 bills currently. 

Unfortunately, any progressive legislation created in the House goes directly under Mitch McConnell’s ass where he proudly sits on it.

It’s hard to create legislation when a surly turtle man refuses to even put it up for consideration. 

Maybe we should see how she compares with another legislator and their lawmaking achievements. How about everyone’s favorite Canadian Texan… Ted Cruz! A man only his daughter could love. 

Or not.

Ted has had 4 terms and sponsored 180 bills. That’s a lot more than 13. However, a grand total of 2 have become law. Though I am sad to see this one did not get any traction. 

So Ted’s had more time and more chances but his batting average is about the same. Also, AOC is trying to save the planet and Ted can’t get balloon pilots to shape up and fly right. 

Beyond that, creating new laws is not all that representatives do. Another important job is oversight and investigation. That whole “checks & balances” thing we are struggling to hold on to. 

AOC was put on the Financial Services Committee which is super rare for a first-term representative. And I think this is where she really “earns” her pay. Her questioning of capitalist scumbags is something to behold. She doesn’t waste her time. She is extremely prepared. And she is able to draw useful information out of just about anyone she questions. 

One of my favorite exchanges was when she questioned Michael Cohen. While others were wasting their time trying to get him to bad mouth the president or catch him in lies, she got him to point directly at where the bodies are buried and at the people who covered them up. 

If we are ever able to hold Trump accountable, I have no doubt these answers will be very useful and damning. 

And if you want to watch an hour of her grilling more scumbags and making them look like giant tools (among other things), this compilation is pretty great. 

I don’t believe in stanning politicians. I want to remain objective and not find myself in a position where I defend their every action and statement. I want to be able to criticize and influence them to work for the best interests of me and those I care about. 

We the people are their boss.  

That said… it is really hard for me not to break that rule for AOC. Because she always seems to be fighting for the dignity of the downtrodden. 

Conservatives are right to fear her. She has a chance to inspire a new generation that will destroy their backwards 1950s values and create a more equitable society.   

They try to call her stupid, but that falls apart under any amount of scrutiny. 

They try to call her a child of privilege, an elite, and a fraud…

Wow, look at that palatial estate!

But then they also try to say she is just a lowly bartender not worthy of the Congress of the United States. 

They can’t make up their minds.

And then there is the most common attack they all fall back on when they can’t find anything else to criticize. 

She magically, and all on her own, swatted Amazon away from New York and lost like… a zillion jobs. 

Even though she really only amplified a movement led by many of her constituents. (Ya know, those people she represents.) You can find this great sin mentioned in many of her Twitter threads–whether it is relevant or not. 

Some folks even bought a billboard in New York. 

(By “some folks” I mean small business owner and billionaire founder of Home Depot, Bernie Marcus.)

All of those numbers are misleading and it doesn’t mention the billions of dollars in subsidies New York was planning to give for the privilege of having an Amazon headquarters. 

But… Amazon came anyway… without the incentives. 

No, it wasn’t quite the 25,000 jobs that Amazon promised they’d deliver. But having Amazon around hasn’t exactly worked out for everyone and she was probably right about it being a bad idea. 

The attempts to quash her spirit have been unsuccessful. She continues to thrive and gain momentum in her career. They seem to be running out of ways to criticize her so they have become desperate to find things that will tear her down. She seems to have inherited Obama’s “Grey Poupon” attacks on the daily now. 

With everything she does, they must find some way to criticize. This Animal Crossing thing is only the latest ridiculous attempt. And it wasn’t just “Robert” saying that–the GOP candidate running against her tried the very same thing. 

I wonder how that went for her. 

I think one of my favorite failed attempts at criticism was when the news broke that AOC was using her own campaign contributions to feed her district during this pandemic. 

This is the money she needs to get reelected. You’d think this selfless act that risks her campaign’s resources would be seen as positive… even by the coldest right wing hearts. Seems like a safe, criticism-free activity. 

But as Dr. Ian Malcolm said…  

Suddenly they all became campaign finance experts. 

“You are feeding the poor incorrectly!” –Jesus probably

It would seem they didn’t google the FEC regulations before making this accusation.

And if they are truly that concerned about campaign finance laws, then I’ve got a doozy for them. 

Remember kids, never leave a paper trail when paying off adult film stars.

In conclusion, my personal politician-stanning rules be damned… 

AOC has twirled into my heart and given me hope that things can change. 

I think she’s neato and I want to have a puppy playdate with Otis and Deco. 

sway hips in a figure 8 motion

do this while bending the knees into a squat position

come back up

raise arms above head

look at armpit seductively

put hands in hair

don’t pay attention to the beat

at all

this is your dancefloor

you rule the school, Megan