Hi/Bi Babe

Lmfao the pause

Love her frames and braids… Aye she pretty

PSA for malwarts employees: check your PPTO balance. They're going to take it to pay you for thanksgiving. If you don't want them to, you gotta go in and request unpaid time off. Same with Christmas. Don't let them steal your PPTO (unless you want the holiday paid)

pandemic episode of malcolm in the middle: malcolm struggles to reconcile his commitment to quarantine safety measures with the fact that all the girls his age are so lonely and isolated that they're suddenly willing to go on dates with HIM, of all people. reese discovers that egging neighbors' houses still counts as a "socially-distanced" activity and has the time of his life. dewey does some mental calculus and realizes that he gets fewer wedgies per day from his brothers than he does from the school bully and decides he'll keep these lockdowns in effect at all costs, so he starts calling in fake pandemic data to local health districts to bump the numbers up. lois gets in a physical altercation with a non-masker at the lucky aide and starts duct taping people's mouths shut, which craig finds both alarming and oddly alluring. (craig then immediately gets infected from licking his hand to slick back his hair in a bid to impress her.) hal works from home but, after slacking off on the family computer all day, is driven to obsession by the thought of becoming the digital solitaire world champion.

“I will erupt, feral, from the cardigan screaming, pounce over the counter and eat the entire five kilograms of cheese”

Side note on this: all those college conservatives saying liberal professors are shutting them down because of their conservative ideas and refusing to hear otherwise? In my experience the “shut down” is just being asked to DEFEND their position for the first time and not accepting shitty half thought out “proofs” that fall apart on their own.

UNDETECTABLE MEANS UNTRANSMISSIBLE

*drives up to the humane society and yells out my window* YEAH I’D LIKE A MEDIUM PEPSI

Someone on Twitter pointed out that apart from all the different elements, this is a master class in story telling and comedic timing.

good morning to all the long-legged socialists, smooth-skinned marxists, ethereal bisexuals, and pseudo-intellectuals

garlic has never wronged me… been a friend through it all

It also allows for the top (less hard to get and more disposable) mask to be switched out regularly while keeping the N95 on consistantly, which helps prevent germs from being spread even more! 

This is what I had to wear during the height of the pandemic working at the hospital. I got to hour 15.5 of a 16 wearing both before I started to feel slightly light-headed (I also didn’t drink much water or eat much that day so there were other factors)