G-d’s most heterosexual transman

God likes you sweaty

literally no one knows how to be fans of musicians in a respectful, non-intrusive way anymore, except for my mutuals, who are trying to convince 82 year old bob dylan that he is nonbinary

Davening is a lot like driving I think. Everyone going faster than you is a shkutz and everyone going slower than you is an overcompensating flip-out

liberalised religious people love saying "no one actually literally believes [orthodox belief of centuries which the recognised global leaders of the religion hold as true and the majority of local religious figures teach as to be believed literally]" it's literally their favourite thing to say. it's enrichment for them.

god likes you lonely. god likes you crushing on him. rumor is he's clingy. rumor is he's buried in the valley of negev. i know he's in your bed, though. i know his knees are to his chest on your bed, his cheeks flushed the color of lilacs. i know he loves you. he tells me this

20 Then the LORD said to Moses, "Swinging in the backyard pull up in your fast car whistling my name. 21 Open up a beer and you say get over here and play a video game. 22 I'm in his favorite sundress watchin me get undressed take that body downtown. 23 I say you the bestest lean in for a big kiss put his favorite perfume on. 24 Go play your video game"

i've got an amazing homoerotic dark academia father issues coming of age drama for the girls to try. it's called the chosen

The level of surprise one reacts with when I say that I’m Jewish correlates directly with how attractive they think I am beforehand