Jupiter's Fish Blog

please allow me to introduce you to everyone’s favorite Rubik’s cube of the sea, the Yellow Boxfish. they’re, uh.

 well. see for yourself.

a vision of geometric perfection and kissy lips

yeah.

despite looking like an ocean-borne Bethesda glitch, the Yellow Boxfish is a real animal with hopes and dreams just like yours.

well, maybe slightly more angular

found in warm water reefs worldwide, (say that five times fast) Yellow Boxfish start life tiny and bright yellow, eventually fading in color as they reach their adult length of about 18 inches. they live mostly off algea and the bitter tears of mathematicians. (just wait until they discover the Hypercube Boxfish)

your frustration sustains me!

we STILL don’t know how they work- being a literal cube seems to make them incredibly agile swimmers, but we’re not sure why. maybe the ocean is just really into right angles?

nature just loves rectangles I guess

also just in case they weren’t weird enough, they also have a bad habit of squirting a deadly poison everywhere whenever they get startled, like an excitable toxin grenade

PANIC! PANIC! RELEASE THE TOXINS

while it is an efficient way to murder the shit out of every other fish in the general vicinity, this toxin has zero effect on humans. unless you were to attempt to eat the Boxfish, so don’t do that.

you probably couldn’t anyway, this is what a Boxfish skeleton looks like

Chain Moray (Echidna catenata)

the Chian Moray is a species of moray eel found in shallow parts of the western Atlantic Ocean and the Caribbean. It is mainly nocturnal, hiding in holes and crevices in shallow water during the day. Although it may reach a maximum length of 165 cm (65 in), lengths of about 40 cm (16 in) are more common.

Photograph by Betty Wills

Petco is now advertising for betta soroties and will have a tank devoted to female bettas. This highly debated housing and treatment of female splendens is, in my opinion, unethical and abusive.

I ask of you guys to not lash out, and protest petco. Instead inform and teach people the proper treatment of bettas and explain that sororities are a very stressful environment and usually end with the death of many fish.

their arms are similar to our tongues in that their muscle fibers are  oriented in three different directions 

octopuses are disconcertingly strong (anecdotal evidence says that a 15 inch wide octopus was as strong as the scientist handling it)

on that note that same scientist said that when her octopuses escaped she would have to run behind them, “like cats” (paraphrased from sy montgomery’s the soul of an octopus)

aquariums have “octopus enriching programs” so they don’t get bored and fuck shit up in their tanks

they are crazy smart like. really. really fucking smart 

but we can’t compare their intelligence to ours because our evolution branched from the same common ancestor so long ago we cannot comprehend how they think

it’s believed that their intelligence evolved when they lost their shell, and had to adapt to predict how countless of different prey and predators would act, how to avoid them, distract them, lure them or trick them 

they visualize how other creatures are going to act, which means they have have awareness that others are individuals which is a type of consciousness but i can’t remember what it’s called right now 

like, they use tools 

they have distinct personalities 

aquarium octopuses are socialized from a very young age and even though in the wild they are solitary creatures they become extremely friendly with enough human exposure

sometimes they dislike people for no apparent reason and will shoot water at them

they have three hearts 

each of their arms has a tiny brain that controls movement and sensory input on its own i shit you not

they are color blind and yet they can camouflage their color and nobody knows how 

they can change the color and texture of their skin faster than human eyes can keep up with it

great pacific octopuses are white when they are peaceful, and red when they’re excited 

aquarium octopus have escaped their tanks and slithered down pipes into the ocean 

escaped their tanks to eat the fish in other tanks 

escaped their tanks to go fight other octopuses cuz they were bored

octopus fight club

learned how to take photographs

cost thousands of dollars by flooding new floors

they can feel, taste, and smell with their suckers and all of their skin

they enjoy tasting their food by slowly moving it through their suckers instead of shoving it in their beaks

they can rewrite their rna. no, really

the only reason why they haven’t evolved to take over as the next dominant race is because they’re doing pretty well  in the ocean so there’s no need for them to adapt further 

there’s a ton more but i’m so overwhelmed by love i can’ think of any at the moment i’m going to cry

FERDINAND

I got Ferdinand for free from work since he was suffering from awful fin rot and getting progressively worse. He is very shy and has a black hole for a stomach.

KEIKO

Keiko is a beautiful slightly rosy-colored halfmoon female betta, who reminds me of my dearly departed Poppy. She is very nosy.

MAGIKARP

Magikarp is the culmination of months of searching for the perfect orange betta. I’ve wanted an orange betta to sate my want of goldfish, which I don’t think I’ll be able to have (due to space). He is developing much attitude.

CLEO

Cleo is a rehome. She was living with her sister Aggra and a male in a bowl and for several days it didn’t look like she would make it. Her fins are growing back beautifully and her favorite thing to do is dance.

AGGRA

Aggra is Cleo’s sister and was rescued from a life in a bowl with Cleo and a male. Her tail seems permanently split from fighting and has EXPLODED - it’s twice as long as it was when I brought her home. She never sits still and always goes to the top left corner of her tank to be fed.

KUHLI LOACHES, BLACK

Kuhli loaches are my absolute favorite fish. I love watching them slither through the sand and decor and watch their cute little faces. I have eight black kuhlis, collectively called the Noodles: Osiris, Lakshmi, Ganymede, Nagi, Persephone, Pakhet, Lamia, and Sif (pictured).

KUHLI LOACHES, STRIPED

All my kuhlis live in the same tank. Because I can only get striped from my LFS, I am very slowly building my striped population, collectively called the Striped Spaghettis. Currently I have Clytemnestra, Electra, Hector, Damballah (pictured), and Nephthys.

QUEENIE

Queenie is Poe’s little brother, who I at first thought was a girl and who I still sometimes call a girl. She is a camera hog and likes to spy on me, as my chair is right by the tank.

POE

Poe is slightly older than Queenie and spends most of her time playing in the plants and pooping in the filter. She is a vicious wormy hunter.

HENRY BERNARD FRIEND, aka “BERNIE”

APOLLO

Apollo is my baby boy. He was rescued from a neglectful situation and has been with me since he was born. He has epilepsy and may be mentally special needs. He is the most affectionate, loving animal I have ever met.

LUNA

Luna is the light of my life. I received Luna as a present after losing a baby, and this flea-and-worm-infested bundle of grey fur became my new baby. Luna is the smartest cat I’ve ever met - all of my drawers and cabinets are babyproofed and my doors are locked, and my tanks and Bernie’s cage are all double locked because Luna can get into anything.

AISHA