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child stars dying young directly or indirectly as a result of fame-related trauma is just so especially sad. for me it’s the tragedy of how kids don’t really know what they’re signing up for when they ask to be famous, especially back in 2008. liam’s mistakes, addiction, and bad decisions, are all so inarguably tied into his career and the carelessness of the entertainment industry. the 31 year old man that just died is the same 16yo boy that was given drugs and alcohol to keep him quiet while he was being overworked and exploited. corey haim, river phoenix, judy garland, and so many more. you can think what you want about liam and have your own opinions, but don’t lose sight of the larger picture that he was a victim of.

i think it’s really weird to treat everything as a “hollywood conspiracy” when someone famous dies. not everything has deep layers of evil plot. like maybe think about how fame and celebrity oftentimes sets up young people for failure, and that reality is actually far more sinister.

i can’t stop thinking about that interview where harry said that when a friend dies you always keep asking yourself what if you had reached one more time. and it breaks my heart a little more.

I’ve lost friends and family before and gone through some truly awful things, but this grief feels different. I think it’s because I’ve never lost something so intrinsically and almost solely linked to joy. like that’s what 1d represented for me for so many years and still does. when I’m at my absolute lowest, to this day, I put on 1d songs to make me feel happier, and it always works. and now I’m at loss, because I don’t know what to reach for