it'scomplicated

I'll idealize and realize that it's no sacrifice; Because the price is paid And there's nothing left to grieve.

Get Gone - Fiona Apple

recently I dug out TPOF. was lacking ideas and details for analysis, so it was time for the oldies to shine. not sure if I can call it that, but still it has a whole DLC dedicated to Ren. should've been a great boost but instead, it gave me a deja-vu and a topic for research. you see, talks about how Ren copied Strade's entire personality were going around a lot, but I didn't see it this way; I just thought that Ren was using his abuser's stuff as a pacifier, aka to cradle own wounds. but I was wrong.

this goes much deeper than Ren trying to comfort himself, but that also has a place. actually, there seems to be two main reasons on why the stuff he does is copying and coping.

first and foremost, attachment issues. he was never loved. his mother, who was supposed to be safe, killed Ren's siblings, leaving him alive for whatever reason. I'm thinking she tried to keep the bloodline clean, but does that matter? she was his mother. she was supposed to protect him unconditionally. and if she doesn't, it's only natural for Ren to think that he's disposable; I mean, he could've been at any of his siblings' place. and if he's not good enough to even exsist, even for his own mother, then what is he worth? he might believe that there's something inherently wrong with him. that he's unlovable or conditionally acceptable at best.

an online date only worsens it. they ditch Ren, confirming whatever thoughts he had at that point. and then there's Strade - manipulative, exploiting, but also loving. he kept Ren alive and running, bought him whatever trinkets, gave a room instead of keeping him down in the basement. I'm sure he even comforted Ren after forcing him to kill or hurt somebody. to a person, who never knew love, that's everything. yes, it comes with burns and cuts, but what is that price, compared to a thing he always wanted? obviously, that's why he got genuinely attached to Strade and has issues letting him go. Ren can't just throw him away. not when it was the only person ever, who made him feel loved.

second is much more simple - coping mechanism. that's the topic I needed to research, for I couldn't wrap my head around the paradox; a protective mechanism, supposed to protect one's mind, supposed to shield them- how copying your whole abuser could do that? but that's a two-sided coin. when the trauma is something overwhelming and unpredictable, one's mind will try its best, just to rein that somehow. thoroughly research every aspect of the trauma, repeatedly putting themselves in a loop, trying to act different every time - anything just to regain some control. copying your abuser falls to that category, because you literally become the embodiment of that traumatic force. that's the highest you can get, which means nothing will hurt you there. a rough explanation, but hope you get the point.

so, having all that, I'll say that Ren was doomed from the start. it was only a matter of time for someone like Strade to exploit his vulnerabilities.

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I feel like Ren's therapist when writing posts like this, lol. I like uncovering his nuance but it makes me so sad too. he's such a good character auugghhhh(((((((

look what else I can do, lol. saw the pic and immidiately thought of Ren.

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saw someone say that Strade could possibly Pavlov player into liking gore. rushed to search that in the game and he could. he absolutely could. he even did that to Ren already, for I doubt that he was into gore before.

I'm terrified of how smart Strade has become in ykmet.

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if you don't know what Pavlov I'm talking about, this article might help. take care!

okay, I wasn't planning on posting so soon but I saw a wildest take about Ren Hana and just had to share my thoughts.

I lost the original thing (or maybe it was deleted), but it stuck in my head deep enough, hence I'll paraphrise it. I'm not going to say anything about the author, bc we're allowed to have opinions; that post just was a really bad simplification of Ren for me.

<<Ren is still a monster. Neither his Lima syndrome or his trauma could explain his actions. He IS a well written victim, but he shouldn't be described better than Strade. No way we're making Strade actions worse and explain Ren's, only because he's a victim and might have a reason to be this way.>>

right. I'm not sure which timeline we're talking about - pre or post Strade (I'll also talk about it ), so let's take the first thing. and the take is already losing its credits, because while Ren was in Strade's basement, all of his actions had a pretty strong explanation. he's literally restricted and shocked for various reasons, plus Strade is a mind-break freak. he might enjoy some resistance, but even so, there's only two outcomes:

to fold and to do what he asks;

to die.

seriosly, this man has ironclad dominance and won't allow anyone to push it. Ren tries to survive, not to stay morally clean. yes, the ways he's doing that are disgusting, but there's no other way with a man loke Strade. Ren doesn't have any other, more safe ways to resist and postpone his own death.

now to the post-Strade days. here that take re-gains points, for Ren had more accountability when his abuser died. I won't justify him, as he still did terrible things, but I won't say that he could have a better life either. because trauma isn't a one-time event, especially such a complex one; it has lifelong consequences. Strade had made Ren so mentally wrecked that it's hard to talk about any "better options". at least because to start healing and to choose a different path one has to be emotionally content and face own wounds. not going to talk about the first, for Ren never had a change to develop proper EQ: his whole life was centered on survival. and I'll be short on the latter - he can't. it still hurts, still too big of a pill to swallow (he gets emotional, talking about all the stuff in btd2) and he has no one to hold his hand through. he's stuck, but that's the tragedy of his character. he just kept doing torture, without stopping to think or reflect, because it hurt too much.

now, for the conclusion. I think that we can't lump Strade and Ren together, for the reasons they do crime are completely different:

it was Strade's choice. he had a good childhood, a good life overall; he just decided that it's the thing he wants to do;

while Ren wasn't sane enough to even think that he has a choice.

the last thing I'm going to say is that there's a difference between justifuying and understanding a character. while I can't justify Ren, I think that his trauma is an exoustive explanation for the way he is.

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©itsccomplicatedd

hey hey! got a small bit of analysis, for I don't have time on a full swing lately. it's not so much about the game, but a pattern I've noticed in some fan art. an unusual format for my blog, but I still wanted to share a detail that I've seen around a lot.

as we all know, Ren is Japanese. this country is deeply rooted in traditions and symbolic meanings, so I knew I'd find something about the kimono color he usually wears in fan arts. to see what I'm talking about check out renhana_mylovelymalewife account on tiktok. their very first post has Ren dressed up in olive color. from the bits I could find, it symbolises a strong connection with nature. which is a bit funny, because Ren, being a beastkin, couldn't be more tied to it. also, for it's a shade of green, it might represent vitality, which is also very fitting. he managed to get the collar and outlive his own abuser; of course, it cost him his own head, but his body is still there. he's still alive. now to his mother. a shadowy lady, but I've seen a lot of her drawings too. she wears red, which is all about life force and passion. careful, for the next thing I say is cruel, but I think that it ties a lot to her primal nature. we don't know much, only that she killed Ren's siblings & her own children, and that's how it happens with actual animals. they're driven by instinct to keep the bloodline (colony, in her case) strong, and so get rid of the cubs that are weak or unhealthy. that's the life force she shows, along with protection; in kimonos red is also meant to ward off any evil, but here it's ironic, for she became an evil herself.

maybe I'm looking too deep in the simple things, but hey, that's the spark of it. it's amazing to watch how such small points can connect to a bigger picture, even if it's just colors. okay, that's all for now. take care!

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©itsccomplicatedd

p.s. I'll drop cites that I used in here, just to backup my research.

today I want to cover some abstract things. the possibility of another person getting the collar, to be exact, because I've seen a lot of oc's in it, and it makes my thoughts wonder.

! before I'll start the rant I want you to know that I have nothing against people making their own characters. they're just having fun and I'm just shoving you all the nooks my curiosity had lead me into. these are just my views on the story unfolding. !

first of all, Ren would be ecxited. he spent months without any normal connection, barely having anyone to talk to, and now they're going to be here every day. well, he makes sure of it; once the person settles, he'll tell everything they need to survive in Strade's house. what provokes, what makes him excited, even how to cause less harm for yourself. this is the lest he could do, if he wants his mind slipping away slower. I mean, Strade's talk is overwhelming sometimes. think about that day-3 convo, when he presses the player to the saw table, speaking peoplemachines stuff. most of it just went over my head, even though I scrolled back over and over. man talks in riddles and Ren just needs someone who won't do that.

it could appear like the beginning of a friendship, but no. Ren knows better than getting attached; just imagining what Strade would do if he found out there's a bond makes him sick. and actually, the person beside is mortal still. they could die anyday and anyhow, starting from Strade's carelesness. well, it's partial, but Ren is always afraid that it might be too late one time or another.

now, let's move to the more complex part. jealousy. not the usual one, where one gets upset by receiving little attention. well, to some extent, but it's more dread than anything else. what if there's more to a new pet than to him? what if he stops being interesting? that means Strade will just get rid of him. that he'll just kill Ren someday because that's the only way he goes with people who are no fun. and that's what terrifies Ren the most. he could start to be more agressive, provocative even but only because he doesn't want to die. he would do anything if it meant he'll be intriguing for Strade.

now every moment where something seems wrong could make him crawl up the walls.

but even with all that being said, I think he'll enjoy having someone around. it's a lot of benefits, including easier distraction from whatever's going around, or the opportunity to replicate something, resembling normal relationships. his feelings would vary, but the good ones would prevail more often. after all, he's not the type to turn his nose up on the only normality around.

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another enormous text brick, lol. Ren has so much nuance it's hard not to dig in it, and I could write more if my thoughts weren't so vague. not in that format, tho, more like some headcanon dump on how life with Ren could be. imma think about it. take care!

one of my favourite ones. it's so funny how blud came rushing down the stairs as soon as he heard that player is hurt. he's so emotionally intelligent but didn't have a single thought about that yell being odd maybe we weren't shown that it's still funny.

he's absolutely stupid when he's excited.

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song: Rebug - run run run

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I couldn't find the credits on that Ren art I used, so if you have them, lmk!

okay, I'm not going to post only memes. I'm in a process of writing a new analysis thing, and these pics are my way of taking breaks ^__^ I'll be back on track soon. take care and remember to rest too!

foxes are naturally vocal, so perhaps, Ren is no different. Strade likes talkers, they're one of his favs, but do you think he ever just:

because foxes are loud. they make noise on every ocassion, squeaking or barking, especially when they are excited or afraid. could be hard to human ear. could make some torture sessions end sooner.

Ren probably has a barking laugh tho-

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my favourite things about Ren and the general fox symbolism is how they conradict. foxes are self-sufficient, while he's, uh... let's just say that it's quite tough because of his abandonment fear. even when he tries to be cold or distant, it makes him emotionally dependent on every person close. he needs someone near, so there's no self-sufficiency in the first place. but no blaming. we all know how lonely he is.

another interesting fact: the fox symbolises adaptability.

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returning briefly to the topic of Ren having mitski's songs vibes, I also want to mention Cop Car. it would be a crime if I didn't, even though there's not much about lyrics this time. the ones I put in the headline made me think about how his character was before Strade.

I see Ren as a fiery and brisky fox, perhaps with a bit of a temper. can't say he doesn't have one, since he keeps lashing out at player, but hey. there's a reason. he might've been very lively before Strade took him.

I have a feeling that menace of a man would call him feisty, so let's do that too. I hate it, but it's the most coherent way to explain. Ren definitely was feisty in the moment of abduction - biting, scratching and simply trying to resist what was going to happen. I see him as a fighter type, but a broken one. Unfortunately, Strade is smart, and knows how to make people snap.

Ren could put up a fight as long as he wanted, but got confused and supressed. Strade makes a great deal of an emotional swing, going back and forth in extreme steps: at first he only hurts and mocks but then seems to care and soothe all of a sudden. that would throw every person off balance, right? that's why, after such acts of "kindness" Ren could begin to doubt that his rudeness is justified. He wouldn't want to bite the hand that feeds him, would he? and about supressed, look. I would not be putting up a fight if I was tied up and the man before me was holding up a drill. it's only natural that Ren quieted down after that.

later, if his vigour happened to renew, Strade could take him to the basement and just leave him there, aka "sit there and think about your actions" thing. remember the moment when Ren was showing the grate? he said that happened and, oh, do I need to tell how stressful that is? to just sit somewhere, hungry, losing track of time and unsure, if Strade will come down ever again. of course, he would, but to Ren every such punishment felt like his last days. so, after a couple of them he becomes well-behaved, just to never expirience that again. plus, that presses on his fear of abandonment

sooo. that explains why he's afraid of Strade but could jump at player if they trigger him in any way. in "escaped with clear hands" ending Ren literally attacks the player when he sees his collar remote in their hands. but with Strade he tries to persuade him not to press the button. like. he's not obedient, he just knows who and what could get him killed.

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please tell me you got what I meant because I wanted to share this piece of psychology so bad. take care!

today I want to share one of my Ren Hana headcanons, because, oh boy, he's messed up, and I love that type of characters.

Ren is mitski-coded. someday I was listeting to his characters' playlist on spotify, suddenly heard Drunk Walk Home there, and it strucked me so bad. especially 'For I'm startin' to learn I may never be free' one.

but I want to talk about I Don't Smoke, from the same album, because that's literally how Ren feels about Strade?? l mean?? Literally??

being with you makes the flame burn good - Ren's hurt, physically and mentally and we all know that. he also does, but in the "you let him to bloody freedom" ending, he snaps at player, saying that Strade was the one who loved him. you see what I'm seeing? he's being hurt, but he conciders it as a sign of love of some kind, and that's what makes it easier to endure.

if your hands need to break more than trinkets in your room, you can lean on my arm, as you break my heart - that one is pretty obvious.

now the rest of my days are just waiting, for when you come down and tell me - that one's too. with Strade Ren's life narrows to anticipation of being acknowledged.

just don't leave me alone, wondering where you are - there goes my favourite!! Ren's deepest fear is abandonmet and he will do anything, anything it takes, to keep that fear from becoming a reality. even if it means being tortured; Strade's attention is violent, with hurt being the only way to get it, but Ren will still try. that's his only way to be interesting, thus not forgotten about.

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oh, phew. explaining my head is tough, but I hope I made myself clear with that one. have a good day and take care of yourself!