Chapter 7

He left me because he said it was for his career and his family. 

How are you? - I’m doing okay and it is better than the 1st week, I am slowly getting myself back :) thanks to our busy schedule in school.

What are the things that made you focus again? - Well, so far I am reorganizing my goals because previously I included him all in my plans. - My goals now are somehow the same though I just deleted our plans together

What are your goals now? Graduate 2019 > Physician and Resident Surgeon by 2020 > Legit Surgeon 2025 > The rest would be to treat my mom like a queen, to do volunteering abroad, to have my own family, to take MBAand lastly to have my own foundation to help people like free clinic or consultation; or to sponsor students with financial problems who want to become a doctor too

Are there other things that made you forget him? - I deleted Facebook account and Instagram app for me not to check on him as well as not to see any people related to him may it be my friends or his friends. In addition, I don’t want to see any bad vibes on my news feed so I created a new FB account with no friends at all just purely academics because we have this class group that all announcement or corrections are there. - I went trekking (haha) with my relatives to the volcano’s crater and seriously it helped a lot in bringing myself back. I’m happier and I feel free. - I just tried the tinder app, because I am curious about it. It’s not that I’m looking for another man or a relationship, I’m just really curious about it. I enjoyed swiping left and right with my friends and my cousins too (hahaha). It somehow boosted my self-esteem because I thought no one would like me again, but looking at it somehow there are still guys who are interested or liked me (probably based on my profile picture).

Day 0 - Watched movie and cried; Made myself more beautiful on Christmas Eve. Day 1 - Same Day 2 - Deleted everything and Unfriended him; Spent more time with friends and family Day 3, 4, 5, 6 - Being sarcastic and played and sang sad songs Day 7 - NYEve of course I forgot him for a while Day 8, 9 - Happy Me Day 10 - Back to School; Paid Bills; kept myself busy Day 11 - Cleaned my stuff and saw some stuff that reminded me all of him; Restless and went to sleep early

We were really in love with each other, he kept on saying we’ll be together forever… And I foolishly believed it.

We were totally fine, exchanging sweet messages, doing our good night facetime, updating each other once in a while. And then…. Few days later he became cold. I asked if there was a problem, he said none and he said he was just busy. I understand.

Another cold days, no calls nor texts at all. Thinking that he was really busy.

I asked if I was a burden to him. He said Maybe. I asked if he still needs and loves me. He said He doesn’t know. Then it became quiet.

Days gone by until I asked if what are his plans because I can definitely understand and adjust for him. He said it’s hard and still doesn’t know.

24th of Dec, he just ended everything with just one SMS saying he’ll be focusing on his career.

What happened to those happy days? How about our future plans? Our promises to each other? What went wrong? Am I not good enough for him? Is he really busy? Or he found someone else?